#TeamTrainwreck 22: Every dark cloud has a pewter lining!

[Jeschke]

Even I'm not delusional enough to think P/R will be on the podium.

Amateur.

Kostornaia is out.

Out out? Must have missed.

Gumennik is going to let those wings fly!

 

[rfisher]

Out out. As of today.

If Trusova cannot capitalize on this, she doesn't deserve to by my favorite any more.

Or Kamilla.

I'm good either way.

 

[taz'smum]

Out out. As of today.

If Trusova cannot capitalize on this, she doesn't deserve to by my favorite any more.

Or Kamilla.

I'm good either way.

Trusova is my favourite too, I love it when she has the bit between her teeth and goes for it!

 

[Colonel Green]

Given Liza’s luck, I’m assuming she will win the national title this year since she there’s no Euros or (let’s be realistic) Worlds to go to.

 

[Vagabond]

Out out.

Damned spot! Out, I say!

 

[Ka3sha]

Mishin said that both Liza and Kolyada have some problems with health (recovering, I guess), but intend to compete and have made it to Chelyabinsk

 

[Colonel Green]

Apparently both Sinitsina and Katsalapov had YKW, but Victoria’s was a really bad case.

 

[mjb52]

Poor things, they're having a very difficult year. Hopefully by late March they should be much better. I think some of these other competitions have been sacrificed to Worlds. You may all call me Pollyanna if you like but I really think Worlds is the one thing the ISU and federations will make happen.

 

[Jeschke]

Sokolovskaya style

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That hashtag game is challenging mine ?

 

[mjb52]

The one that just says #men is the best one.

 

[AngieNikodinovLove (ANL)]

and have made it to Chelyabinsk

Topic drift here but isn’t that where the astroid exploded in Russia? I’ve watched enough history channel and “ancient aliens” that the city sounds familiar to me

 

[NAOTMAA]

Topic drift here but isn’t that where the astroid exploded in Russia? I’ve watched enough history channel and “ancient aliens” that the city sounds familiar to me

It was a meteor in 2013. Exploded right over the Urals

 

[Vagabond]

I enjoy Pog's skating so much, but I almost always wanna check the results / protocol BEFORE I watched her in case it was once of those crashing performances.

Pogorilaya without splats is like ice without skating.

 

[AngieNikodinovLove (ANL)]

It was a meteor in 2013. Exploded right over the Urals

That’s what I meant, meteor. For all of those who have never seen this on the history channel you should go to the YouTubes and watch it. There’s quite an amount of different angles of the explosion. Knocked out all the windows of all the buildings in the city as well.

 

[Jeschke]

Dear train riders,

this has been quite a year. With all what's going on in the world, this thread, as usual, has always been a great distraction for a few moments.
Thanks for all your input, random links, bizarre stories, the and above all: the laughter!

Merry Christmas and happy holidays to all of you!? Stay healthy and have a great time with your famiies and friends, even when it might be a little different this year
This counts the same for all those not celebrating christmas at all/now, or having their festivities on a totally different date.

Alt er love!

--

As I will be off over the christmas days, your present comes early. Vice and i thought long about delivering you a very special kibosh-ian christmas present, but were kinda worried it might lead to endless pack whining over the christmas days. So we postponed kibosh until new year, to start it in style

So, to lighten the mood, here's our present for you: MESS Shortlist 2020/21 Part 1

--

Boss is out ??‍

 

[Ka3sha]

Congratulations to Anna Pogorilaya and Andrei Nevsky on the birth of their daughter.

https://twitter.com/ifsmagazine/status/1341539815750332420

 

[rfisher]

Remember the Christmas when Boss man was away and we ran amok adding skaters to the team? And Vice was one of the prime instigators? #gleafulanticipation

 

[SmallFairy]

Vita Kareva made the short list?

 

[Vagabond]

Remember the Christmas when Boss man was away and we ran amok adding skaters to the team? And Vice was one of the prime instigators? #gleafulanticipation

Do you have any suggestions?

 

[taz'smum]

Remember the Christmas when Boss man was away and we ran amok adding skaters to the team? And Vice was one of the prime instigators? #gleafulanticipation

Go for it! While the cat is away, the mice get to play....???

 

[mjb52]

I feel like the last times we went awry and pushed skaters onto the team they ended up breaking up! Maybe we shouldn't chance it.

 

[rfisher]

Do you have any suggestions?

I'll let you know starting tomorrow.

 

[AngieNikodinovLove (ANL)]

Remember the Christmas when Boss man was away and we ran amok adding skaters to the team? And Vice was one of the prime instigators? #gleafulanticipation

Lollll yes. These are the times I usually try and slip in The Knierims for ticket holders!!! Lolz

 

[rfisher]

Lollll yes. These are the times I usually try and slip in The Knierims for ticket holders!!! Lolz

You only have half a Knierim so, it might work this time.

 

[AngieNikodinovLove (ANL)]

You only have half a Knierim so, it might work this time.

Bwahhhh

???

 

[Vagabond]

For those who are new, have forgotten, or have not been paying attention:

-Patron-Saint:
Pogorilaya, Anna

Ladies:
Glenn, Amber
Honda, Marin
Konstantinova, Stanislava
Leonova, Alena
Lim, Eunsoo
Nugumanova, Elizaveta
Peltonen, Emmi
Schott, Nicole
Tuktamysheva, Elizaveta

Men:
Aymoz, Kévin
Březina, Michal
Litvintsev, Vladimir
Nadeau, Nicolas
Pulkinen, Camden
Sadovsky, Roman
Samohin, Daniel
Yan, Han

Ice Dance:
Shpilevaya, Anastasia / Smirnov, Grigory

Criteria:
1) Skater needs a complete package to potentially be a top skater at Euros/4CC's/Worlds/Olympic level
2) Skater needs to have the ability to absolutely rock one day and splat the day after. Even better: rock and splat during one program
3) Skater is not afraid of breaking one's heart over and over again
4) Skater needs more splat/messy performances than great ones

Rules:
1) Worlds/Olympic medalists and Euro/4CC's champions are not eligible
2) Multiple Euros/4CC's medal winners are not eligible
3) Membership and changes to the Rules and Qualities shall be decided by consensus among longstanding posters in the #TeamTrainwreck Threads, subject to points 1) and 2)
4) The pinky166 is not allowed to make more than one proposal a day
5) Proposals can be submitted in the #teamtrainwreck thread
6) New membership is granted only to current skaters
7) New membership is only granted to senior skaters (at least one international senior competition)
8) Membership can be cancelled due to points 1) and 2), numerous decent skates in a row or not being competitive on elite level anymore.

Qualities:
1) Being a student of Volchkova/Rukavicin
2) Big boobs/nice ass
3) Boobs/belly/nipples showing
4) Mule kick
5) Being Uzbek/Russian
6) Last name called Schott
7) Bizarre off ice incidents
8) Coach
9) Costume (-Malfunction)
10) Splats
11) Bizarre Choreo
12) Hair
13) Bizarre salchows
14) Penchant for dying in the second half of the program - NEW

Also, my nomination of Deniss Vassiljevs was under consideration, pending further evidence.

I respectfully renominate Telenovela in full knowledge that he may be relegated back to being under consideration when and if Daddy ever gets back.

Wenn die Katze aus dem Haus ist, werden die Mäuse auf dem Tisch tanzen! ???

ETA: I keep meaning to change Quality #6 to idiomatic English, but I just can't! ?‍

 

[taz'smum]

6) Last name called Schott


ETA: I keep meaning to change Quality #6 to idiomatic English, but I just can't! ?‍

How about upping the anti - Last-name called Schott ?

 

[kwanfan1818]

Telenovela

 

[Vagabond]

Further assistance for those who might need it:

Glossary:
#TTW = Team Trainwreck
1930's Belarussian = Katsiarina Pakhamovich
Big Bro = Michal Březina
Bossman = Jeschke (not Norman Jeschke)
Cave In = Kévin Aymoz (from the French pronunciation of his first name and his tendency to cave in)
Comfy Balls = Sondre Oddvoll Bøe (from his brand of shorts for underwear, as reflected on his social media posts)
Danny Salmon = Daniel Samohin
Elvis = Nicolas Nadeau (from his Elvis Presley Free Skate of a few of seasons ago)
Lil Sis = Eliška Březinová
Lovebirds = Two young skaters who display their affection for each other on social media (exact meaning depends on context)
Narcissus and Echo = Guillaume Cizeron and Gabriella Papadakis
Our boy = Dmitri Aliev
Perkov = Anton Shulepov (through his marriage to Perkova)
Perkova = Alena Leonova
Poster boy = Daniel Samohin
Poster girl = Stanislava Konstantinova
Pressman = Vagabond
Queen U = Elizaveta Ukolova
Romsky = Roman Sadovsky (from his moniker on social media)
Telenovela = Deniss Vasiljevs, either with or without his coach (for obvious reasons)
TM1 = Maria Artemieva (Trainwreck Maria #1)
TM2 = Maria Stavitskaya (Trainwreck Maria #2)
Tsareva = (1) To react impassively to success or failure; (2) not to suffer fools gladly.
Vice = alchemy_void

MEEPOTS = Most Epic Ending Pose of the Season
MESS = Most Epic Splat of the Season
MIMOS = Most Important Minion of the Season
POTS or -POTS = Performance of the Season
Tursy-POTS = Kiss and Cry Performance of the Season (from Elizabet Tursynbayeva's mother)

FAQ:

If I post in this thread, does that mean I'm on #TTW?
No, the skaters are the ones on the Team, not us. But you may aspire to joining the Fans' Auxiliary.

Who decides whether a skater's membership should be cancelled on grounds other than medalling or retirement?
Normally, the bossman, possibly with the advice of vice. But there's always a first time for everything.

Why are Alena Leonova, Elizaveta Tuktamysheva, and Han Yan on the List?
The bossman has his delusions, and we humor him.

Do you have to be voidy to be on the Team?
No, but it helps. You do, however, have to be heartbreaking.

Is there an anti-American bias here?
Not at all. Several Americans are or have been on the team, e.g., Amber Glenn, Camden Pulkinen, and Gracie Gold.

What is the Black Mark of #TTW?
It's our own special curse, bestowed when da bossman allows a skater to the Team based on a certain number of votes rather than his own judgment or a consensus, as required by Rule #3. The curse has been known to end skaters' careers or send their lives into a tailspin.

Sally Skater and Peter Partner tripped each other after doubling their salchows at last weekend's competition. Surely that makes them worthy of the Team.
In and of itself, falling once or even several times in one program does not warrant membership. Please reread the Criteria.

Why aren't skaters allowed on the Team before they skate Seniors at the international level?
We want to give them time to mature without putting too much pressure on them.

Why is this thread in The Trash Can, whereas From Russia with Love is in Great Skate Debate?
That's a good question.

Is there a King and Queen, or is everybody equal?
No, but we do have the bossman and vice.

Can someone clarify what this thread is for/about?
No.

 

[kwanfan1818]

I really like Emily Zhang's skating a lot, but she had an axel mishap at the current US qualifier that could have made the MESS tape.