#TeamTrainwreck 19: The Journey of a Thousand Miles Starts with a Single Splat

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J

Jeschke

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:gallopin1 -Patron-Saint:
Pogorilaya, Anna

Ladies:
Gold, Gracie
Gubanova, Anastasiia
Honda, Marin
Konstantinova, Stanislava
Leonova, Alena
Sakhanovich, Serafima
Schott, Nicole
Tuktamysheva, Elizaveta

Men:
Aliev, Dmitri
Aymoz, Kévin
Březina, Michal
Nadeau, Nicolas
Sadovsky, Roman
Samohin, Daniel

Pairs:
Peng, Cheng / Jin, Yang

Ice Dance:
Shpilevaya, Anastasia / Smirnov, Grigory


Watch List:
Ladies: tba
Men: Pulkinen, Camden
Pairs: Panfilova, Apollinariia / Rylov, Dmitry
Dance: tba
 
Vagabond

Vagabond

Well-Known Member
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23,768
The journey of a thousand miles starts with a single splat. But if you're a Pairs or Ice Dance Team, it may start with a double splat. :yikes:

For those who are new to these thread, have forgotten everything, or haven't been paying attention, here's how we roll here:

Criteria:
1) Skater needs a complete package to potentially be a top skater at Euros/4CC's/Worlds/Olympic level
2) Skater needs to have the ability to absolutely rock one day and splat the day after. Even better: rock and splat during one program
3) Skater is not afraid of breaking one's heart over and over again
4) Skater needs more splat/messy performances than great ones

Rules:
1) Worlds/Olympic medalists and Euro/4CC's champions are not eligible
2) Multiple Euros/4CC's medal winners are not eligible
3) Membership and changes to the Rules and Qualities shall be decided by consensus among longstanding posters in the #TeamTrainwreck Threads, subject to points 1) and 2)
4) The pinky166 is not allowed to make more than one proposal a day
5) Proposals can be submitted in the #teamtrainwreck thread
6) New membership is granted only to current skaters
7) New membership is only granted to senior skaters (at least one international senior competition)
8) Membership can be cancelled due to points 1) and 2), numerous decent skates in a row or not being competitive on elite level anymore.

Qualities:
1) Being a student of Volchkova/Rukavicin
2) Big boobs/nice ass
3) Boobs/belly/nipples showing
4) Mule kick
5) Being Uzbek/Russian
6) last name called Schott
7) Bizarre off ice incidents
8) Coach
9) Costume (-Malfunction)
10) Splats
11) Bizarre Choreo
12) Hair

Pantheon:
Gimazetdinova, Anastasia
Hubert, Laëtitia
Miner, Ross
Sandhu, Emanuel

Fans' Auxiliary:
alchemy_void
pinky166
SmallFairy
rfisher

Glossary:
#TTW = Team Trainwreck
1930's Belarussian = Katsiarina Pakhamovich
Big Bro 1.0 = Michal Březina
Big Bro 2.0 = Jorik Hendrickx
Bossman = Jeschke (not Norman Jeschke)
Cave In = Kévin Aymoz (from the French pronunciation of his first name and his tendency to cave in)
Comfy Balls = Sondre Oddvoll Bøe (from his brand of shorts for underwear, as reflected on his social media posts)
Danny Salmon = Daniel Samohin
Elvis = Nicolas Nadeau (from his Elvis Presley Free Skate of a couple of seasons ago)
Empress, The = Aliona Savchenko
Lil Sis 1.0 = Eliška Březinová
Lil Sis 2.0 = Loena Hendrickx
Lovebirds = Two young skaters who display their affection for each other on social media (exact meaning depends on context)
Narcissus and Echo = Guillaume Cizeron and Gabriella Papadakis
Our boy = Dmitri Aliev
Perkova = Anton Shulepov (through his relationship with Perkova)
Perkova = Alena Leonova
Poster boy = Daniel Samohin
Poster girl = Stanislava Konstantinova
Pressman = Vagabond
Queen U = Elizaveta Ukolova
Romsky = Roman Sadovsky (from his moniker on social media)
Susie = Ksenia Stolbova (from Google Translate)
Telenovela = Deniss Vasiljevs, either with or without his coach (for obvious reasons)
TM1 = Maria Artemieva (Trainwreck Maria #1)
TM2 = Maria Stavitskaya (Trainwreck Maria #2)
Tsareva = (1) To react impassively to success or failure; (2) not to suffer fools gladly.
Vice = alchemy_void

MEEPOTS = Most Epic Ending Pose of the Season
MESS = Most Epic Splat of the Season
MIMOS = Most Important Minion of the Season
POTS or :gallopin1-POTS = Performance of the Season
Tursy-POTS = Kiss and Cry Performance of the Season (from Elizabet Tursynbayeva's mother)

FAQ:

If I post in this thread, does that mean I'm on #TTW?
No, the skaters are the ones on the Team, not us. But you may aspire to joining the Fans' Auxiliary.

Who decides whether a skater's membership should be cancelled on grounds other than medaling or retirement?
Normally, da bossman, possibly with the advice of vice. But there's always a first time for everything.

Why is Alena Leonova on the List? She has a World Silver Medal.
There's a Perkova Rule, which is so obvious it doesn't need to be included in the Rules above, namely, a skater is on the Team if she (1) has only one World or Olympic Silver or Bronze Medal and no international gold medals, (2) has never won her home country's National Championship, and (3) is Perkova.

What about Liza Tuktamysheva?
The bossman has his delusions, and we humor him.

Do you have to be voidy to be on the Team?
No, but it helps. You do, however, have to be heartbreaking.

Is there an anti-American bias here?
Not at all. Several Americans are or have been on the team, e.g., Ross Miner, Richard Dornbush, Gracie Gold, and Mirai Nagasu.

What is the Pantheon?
The Pantheon is something we cooked up here in the #TTW Press Office to promote those skaters who have retired. Each member of the Pantheon must embody in his or her own way the essence of Team Trainwreck as determined by the pressman.

How do I get on the Fans' Auxiliary?
Not by asking or campaigning for it.

Why isn't being French and hot one of the Qualities?
It's implicit in being French and hot that a skater has the listed Qualities in spades.

Sally Skater and Peter Partner fell on their side-by-side triple flips at last weekend's competition. Surely that makes them worthy of the Team.
In and of itself, falling once or even several times in one program does not warrant membership. Please reread the Criteria.

Why aren't skaters allowed on the Team before they skate Seniors at the international level?
We want to give them time to mature without putting too much pressure on them.

Is there a King and Queen, or is everybody equal?
No, but we do have da bossman and vice.

Can someone clarify what this thread is for/about?
No.

Why is this thread in The Trash Can, whereas From Russia with Love is in Great Skate Debate?
That's a good question.

:gallopin1
 
Last edited:
aliceanne

aliceanne

Well-Known Member
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If a skater with World & Olympic medals changes disciplines, are they eligible for TTW in their new discipline?
 
J

Jeschke

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aliceanne said:
If a skater with World & Olympic medals changes disciplines, are they eligible for TTW in their new discipline?
Click to expand...
New discipline - no.
New partner - yes.
If it's Perkova - no one cares!

Are you already planning for Daisuke?

Edit: Rereading, my statement makes no sense at all. But that feels very appropriate for #ttw standards :D
 
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J

Jeschke

Guest
SamuraiK said:
ummm Tiff channelgin La Khokh!!?
Click to expand...
I just want to point out, these were not the costumes I suggested (as I have praised before) :drama:
I campaigned for those:
simplyalexandramyfavoritethings.blogspot.com

Have You Heard? // "Rewrite The Stars" - Zac Efron & Zendaya (Greatest Showman Soundtrack!)

Happy Friday Friends! I hope that you guys had a great week! It was a nice laid back week -- which is good because this weekend is going to...
simplyalexandramyfavoritethings.blogspot.com simplyalexandramyfavoritethings.blogspot.com
Would have been so good. (((@taz'smum )))
I am pleased Krusty got rid of Jon's costume already :p
 
J

Jeschke

Guest
GP USA Pairs SP recap by boss
(as it happened)

J/B - Lost for words. But well, great for her. The hairdo for both 🆘
C/J - Love the intense beginning. They kept the mood right through the program, great. 'Light of the Seven' is such a good piece of music. #teammargaery :drama:
R/W - Few seasons ago I thought they were promising...
D/F - At least the unitard of NHT is gone. But well, this program does nothing for me and does not fit (especially him) at all. Awesome lift entrance :respec:
A/W - I have a soft spot for him (well, his looks) but they still don't work as a pair for me at all.
P/K - Awesome look :love: Oh yes, this was fabulous! So good! :encore:They are not going down without a fight!
CG/LD - How I can't stand the entrance! Great spin entrance, the rest, surprise, is way too much for me :rolleyes:
P/J - They always have such good short programs, another great vehicle. Loved it.

Ehm, the harder lifts are now allowed for SP too? Must have missed that.
 
alchemy void

alchemy void

Post-its for the win.
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27,291
rfisher

rfisher

Let the skating begin
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72,409
Our boy :cheer2:

Michal :cheer2: We take what we get

Keegan: normally I'm ambivalent but that was a little emotional.

Brown: I acknowledge his skill, but I just keep waiting for him to climb into Orser's lap. You know he wants to.

Nathan wasn't up to his usual standards, but it was certainly enough to win.
 
SamuraiK

SamuraiK

Well-Known Member
Messages
4,445
Skate America Pairs SP Recap:

40yo Cinderella and Bald Prince: Love their guts for still going. Will they sneak a berth for 2022? dont think so but who cares.
LIu & Johnson: Loved the music. Freak stupid fall on the choreo. I would say they have potential but they should have accomplished it some of that by now Im afraid.
Ruest & Wolfe: Compared to previous 2 way faster. Seem nice kids and liked the music but Im already forgetting them.
The other Denney & Simba: I felt they skated more confidently than in previous years but again the SBS jumps what's up with no one landing them? I know this is pairs but still.
Aussies: Improved on the chemisty a bit. It was non existent before. She was really upset.
P&K: Amazing after all the so so skates but why so serious?
US only hope: Umm this pseudo serious thing does not work with them. Back to the sass trash please.
Leftovers: YAY.. they always bring quirky interesting choreo. A bit wuzrobbed. He's so charismatic.

Best Dressed: Windsor
Do Hard: Jin

Best Moment:
 
RoseRed

RoseRed

Well-Known Member
Messages
2,106
SamuraiK said:
Skate America Pairs SP Recap:

40yo Cinderella and Bald Prince: Love their guts for still going. Will they sneak a berth for 2022? dont think so but who cares.
LIu & Johnson: Loved the music. Freak stupid fall on the choreo. I would say they have potential but they should have accomplished it some of that by now Im afraid.
Ruest & Wolfe: Compared to previous 2 way faster. Seem nice kids and liked the music but Im already forgetting them.
The other Denney & Simba: I felt they skated more confidently than in previous years but again the SBS jumps what's up with no one landing them? I know this is pairs but still.
Aussies: Improved on the chemisty a bit. It was non existent before. She was really upset.
P&K: Amazing after all the so so skates but why so serious?
US only hope: Umm this pseudo serious thing does not work with them. Back to the sass trash please.
Leftovers: YAY.. they always bring quirky interesting choreo. A bit wuzrobbed. He's so charismatic.
Click to expand...
It's Calalang/Johnson now. He split with Liu and this is their 2nd season together.
 
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