Deciding to split, after having the skating equivalent of feelers and job interviews, ie feelers and tryouts, is very different than working together for months before giving notice to the old partner or coach. The couples you mentioned didn't have a chance to work extensively behind the old partner's back, not that they necessarily would have, because the old partners were caught out early.Didn't people know that Katsalapov would be splitting with Ilinykh before she did? And Daria Popova heard that Massot would be skating with Savchenko via Romy Szolkowy? And those were active partnerships!
Also IIRC Mukhortova skated in the gala at 2010 Worlds knowing that Trankov was headed elsewhere.
And it's not just coaches/part of the team, like Julie Marcotte in J/R's situations: the Feds can be involved as well.
Or she found out more about how long it was going on and the involvement of her sister-in-law that made her change her mind that he was being aboveboard when she gave him her blessing.Then she must have talked to other people about it and got more and more stuck only in her own point of view (which is a lot of disappointment, and a feeling of betrayal, which I totally understand
Did he really think it wouldn't all come out? Was he setting her up to look bad, knowing she'd be likely to be angry after it did come out, and knowing her well enough to bet that she'd go public and people would be saying she should have kept it private, while he told everyone she was fine with it?