Or small(er) gifts that have value because they're personal.
Abby on “The View” (who I almost always disagree with!) made an interesting observation. This shower was thrown by and attended by fairly new friends who for the most part, with the exception of Jessica Mulroney and I think one other, A list celebrities. There were no old school friends or family. Meghan’s mother who was a short flight away in LA did not attend. I don’t get the impression that “personal” was a goal here. It definitely looked like a see and be seen weekend and I really question the judgement here. As
@AxelAnnie mentioned above, can you imagine the different impression if the friend had gone to Meghan? If that money was pumped into the British economy? If instead of gifts they put together welcome baby boxes for low income moms?
The point is they still could have had a lovely weekend together in the privacy of a British country home somewhere - except that I don’t think they wanted privacy. They wanted to be photographed coming and going from a shower given to a British Princess. And there, sports fans, is the root of the problem.
ETA: before someone says something like “why shouldn’t Meghan get gifts?” I would like to point out that no one is stopping people from sending baby gifts and no one seems to be suggesting that getting together was a problem. The problem was getting together in such a public and indulgent way and then trying to spin it all by donating floral arrangements to kids with cancer. That was just odd IMHO.
Even in my very middle class neighborhood, by DD and her friends decided very early on (I think by their 6th birthdays) that instead of giving each other gifts they would choose a charity and everyone would make a donation. One child who was born in December always had the kids bring a gift that would be given to the Christmas Bureau. They ask for new, unwrapped toys, so the guests would buy a toy, wrap it in Birthday paper. The birthday girl opened them and then they were all donated.
It is easy to be a humanitarian, feminist, environmentalist, whatever else, when it is not inconvenient. It is much more difficult when it is inconvenient and you have to give up something that is important to you.