Is anyone watching Making the Cut? I hope so, because I MUST TYPE ANGRILY IN ALL CAPS about this show. General rant about all the seasons: for the most part, the designers rung rings around the designers on all other fashion shows. I tried to watch Stiched and just...no. It was like amateur hour. Even Project Runway, the top designers can compete, but not most. Which brings me to rant two: how are you going to assemble some of the best up-and-coming designers and have sad, narrow-minded (fashion-wise) judges? When NICOLE FREAKING RITCHIE is the voice of fashion reason, something is way off. I ask myself this season, do I really, really, really like Nicole Ritchie as a judge, or is it like being the tallest pygmy?
This segues nicely into rant three, which is specifically aimed at Heidi Klum. Heidi Klum needs to have a come-to-Chanel moment with the fact that yes, she is aging, and all the micro minis, hot bodyguards, and plastic surgery will not make her 25 again. Leonardo DiCaprio will never date her, and she needs to get over that. I feel like early-30s Heidi Klum understood that not everyone can dress sexy, or most importantly, wants to. For example, I am all in favor of girls dressing however. You want to wear that bikini, go for it. Barely there bra top at the club, knock yourself out. But I don't dress that way, and it's not because I'm in my 40s and now rather fluffy, it's because I've
never dressed that way. Sparkly, cute, maybe tangential-naughty. It's not because I have body issues, it's because it's not my aesthetic. Early PR Heidi totally got that, but I feel like as she gets older, she has a much more narrow version of what fashion is, and it's all either club wear of after-party awards show. Not everybody wants or has the means to be photographed in Ibiza. And Tim Gunn is now useless. He's too far removed to be an effective mentor, and I feel like the designers on this show are beyond needing mentorships. And some of his suit patterns are questionable at best.
Rant the Fourth: Jeremy Scott. Does he bring any value to the show at all? Like, seriously. I would be happier with Isaac Mizrahi and this point. Hell, I'll take a nice turkey-disco ball from Michael Kors. And I don't want to turn this into PR II. I like the way they have it structured to where it's actually a competition about getting to run a business/global brand and all the designers actually design...but they need someone like Tommy Hillfigger (sp?) who I feel was totally the wrong judge for the final on PR this past season, but would be perfect for Making the Cut. Scott is just mean and bitter and I feel like an old stereotype of a designer, and I"ll bet he's on this show just to steal ideas. The way he talked to Yannick was beyond the pale. And Yannick just stood there stoic, because Yannick knows he's better than Scott on Scott's best day.
Which brings me to Rant E, which is on this latest episode specifically:
Hailing from south Louisiana, trust me when I say I am a festival wear expert. Festival wear in south Louisiana, especially, New Orleans and Lafayette, is no joke. It is an absolute art here. There's a way to do things. I have been to every major festival in Louisiana and most of the minor ones in southern Louisiana. I have been to Coachella. I've camped at Bonaroo.
I've been to Down on the Farm. (RIP, DotF) My festival-wear cred is legit. And let me say, Heidi, Jeremy, and Nicole have clearly never been to a festival. Ever. Except for maybe five minutes when they were in the VIP section being photographed. One of their criticisms was the cape wasn't long enough on one of the designers. WHO WEARS A FULL ON DENIM CAPE TO AN OUTDOOR FESTIVAL WHICH IS EITHER DESERT OR MUD. WHO. One of the criticisms was "it isn't practical." Errr...it's a festival. Especially if you're going to Burning Man, it's supposed to get weird. One of the looks they praised the girl had a pound of theatrical make up on. Just no; it would melt off. The idea of a high end and accessible look for festival wear is

as festival wear is really neither. Another criticism is that the looks were "too crafty." Errr, again, it's a festival. Especially for a Louisiana festival, it's literally supposed to look like you've made it at home. That's a look you are specifically going for is crafty.
Now, I will say, the clothes were...not good. But neither was the assignment. First of all the judges bitched that there were too many pastels. Well...it's festival. At least no one used tie-dye. And for their inspiration, they sent them to a "dream museum" which was all...pastels. So...what did they expect? And how is a dream museum related to a festival? Then some of them did international festivals, because the judges weren't specific, and they aren't very well educated in other cultures. If you're going to have international designers who are going to design for their festivals in their hometowns, you need to know something about it. From a fashion standpoint, I agree that my favorite Sienna should have gone home, but she was designing for a festival I don't know much about and neither do the judges. Her looks could have been bang-on. The other designer who went home designed for Pride. They sent him home because his look was impractical, but to me, it was very practical. Southern Decadence is going on RIGHT NOW in NOLA and I promise you, lots of people would look right at home in his outfit. Was it fashion? Maybe not. Was it FESTIVAL? ABSOLUTELY.
I think the judges should just be honest: design something Heidi would wear to attract a man in this situation. That needs to be the directive for all challenges. The brief for this should have been: Heidi has been invited by Overpriced Water Bottle Company to hang around their VIP booth at Coachella for ten minutes and be photographed like the B-list celebrity she is.