Gracie Gold's memoir published February 2024

[overedge]

WHy the secrecy? Others have been named as attackers before they were found guilty? I admit I have not read the book so maybe I am missing something obvious.

Most of the cases discussed here on FSU involve actual criminal charges or SafeSport complaints that have been made public.

 

[Prancer]

ok, a teaser so to speak.

I would guess it's more of a liability issue. If she named him, she would have to deal with the fallout. She might be up for that, or she might not.

As it is, she's given enough clues that there might be fallout anyway. And for those who think there should be fallout from this, she is the victim here and gets to make that decision.

Most of the cases discussed here on FSU involve actual criminal charges or SafeSport complaints that have been made public.

Yes; quite different.

 

[Vagabond]

I would guess it's more of a liability issue. If she named him, she would have to deal with the fallout. She might be up for that, or she might not.

Perhaps more to the point, her publisher would have to deal with it. And I doubt that it is up for that even if she is.

 

[Former Lurve Goddess]

Perhaps more to the point, her publisher would have to deal with it. And I doubt that it is up for that even if she is.

PRH would never expose itself to that kind of liability.

 

[kosjenka]

ok, a teaser so to speak. Did she mention why she did not pursue charges?

I suggest to read the book. The most complicated parts are surprisingly well written.

 

[Former Lurve Goddess]

I suggest to read the book. The most complicated parts are surprisingly well written.

They really are. I was quite impressed.

 

[nylynnr]

I suggest to read the book. The most complicated parts are surprisingly well written.

No surprise, Karen Crouse is a great writer.

 

[kosjenka]

She really helped Gracie, tell her story. She’s a little bit petty on Twitter, but there we go

 

[marmalade]

Is it too late for a PM? I have some ideas, but no certainty.

 

[jkl]

I just finished reading Gracie’s book. It is a powerful read. I had tickets to Boitano’s Lounge on Friday night in Columbus. Gracie was a special guest. There were complimentary copies of her book on every table which Gracie graciously autographed. When I got a moment to speak to her I mentioned I was in the arena at one of her competitions. I told her I was on my feet cheering before she finished her performance. She gave me that million dollar smile and said “You have no idea how much that means to me”. Now that I have read the book I truly understand the comment.

 

[zee703]

Me too... requesting a PM. I just finished that chapter. This is quite a book and shocking info' re: the skating world (at least to me)... especially about the judges.

 

[aemeraldrainc]

Requesting a PM as well.
Thank you in advance!

 

[Prancer]

Can't everyone just PM the person with the info and ask instead of clogging up the thread...(DARN KIDS GIT OFF MA LAWN!!!)

Again, this is an excellent idea.

Please stop posting requests.

 

[sk8rfan]

Requesting a PM please! Thank you

 

[Prancer]

Requesting a PM please! Thank you

Seriously?

Sometimes I wonder why we bother.

I repeat--stop clogging up the thread with PM requests. Ask directly.

 

[Vagabond]

Instead of hanging around waiting for PM's, folks in the United States might use these:

Indie Bookstore Finder
Library Finder

Folks in other countries might use this:

Ecosia (A better planet with every search)

 

[Tangoer]

Instead of hanging around waiting for PM's, folks in the United States might use these:

Indie Bookstore Finder
Library Finder

Folks in other countries might use this:

Ecosia (A better planet with every search)

I think people who are asking are looking for confirmation after reading it & doing their own research. I wasn’t sure of my conclusion and felt a bit less uneasy when someone else confirmed they had come to the same one.

 

[Allskate]

I think people who are asking are looking for confirmation after reading it & doing their own research. I wasn’t sure of my conclusion and felt a bit less uneasy when someone else confirmed they had come to the same one.

For crying out loud. The person offering to respond to PMs doesn't know, either, and is speculating as well. If you want a potentially defamatory PM from this person, then PM them yourself and ask for it.

Prancer, a staff member, repeatedly has directed people to stop clogging this thread with PM requests and to PM this person personally. It's really not that hard to comply and it's pretty rude for people not to do so.

 

[pixie cut]

For crying out loud. The person offering to respond to PMs doesn't know, either, and is speculating as well. If you want a potentially defamatory PM from this person, then PM them yourself and ask for it.

Prancer, a staff member, repeatedly has directed people to stop clogging this thread with PM requests and to PM this person personally. It's really not that hard to comply and it's pretty rude for people not to do so.

I wish I could quadruple like this. The person who is responding to the PMs doesn't know for sure. Unless Gracie told you, frankly keep it among you and your personal friends not people with screen names. If someone knows for sure, I'd still keep that off of FSU because there's a good reason Gracie didn't name said person in the book. There can be consequences for doing so.

 

[Tangoer]

For crying out loud. The person offering to respond to PMs doesn't know, either, and is speculating as well. If you want a potentially defamatory PM from this person, then PM them yourself and ask for it.

Prancer, a staff member, repeatedly has directed people to stop clogging this thread with PM requests and to PM this person personally. It's really not that hard to comply and it's pretty rude for people not to do so.

I’m not disagreeing with you or Prancer on that.

 

[Prancer]

I think people who are asking are looking for confirmation after reading it & doing their own research. I wasn’t sure of my conclusion and felt a bit less uneasy when someone else confirmed they had come to the same one.

But what have you confirmed, other than you have the same suspicions as someone else?

If someone knows for sure, I'd still keep that off of FSU

That would be much appreciated, as it saves us from having to sit on this thread so we can immediately delete such a post.

I get that everyone wants to know, but I think you should have some respect for the fact that Gracie has not (yet) made the name of her attacker public and also maybe some respect for the board and our potential liability as well as your own.

 

[Trillian]

If someone knows for sure, I'd still keep that off of FSU because there's a good reason Gracie didn't name said person in the book. There can be consequences for doing so.

Just on a purely practical level, I’d point out that we have no idea who’s really behind most of the screen names here. I get trying to figure out who’s involved from the hints in the book because I did it too, and I know there are probably even some people here who have more inside dirt than that, but this is a really dicey thing to be discussing with anonymous strangers on the internet. For anyone who is naming names via PM, I would just be really careful you’re prepared for who might be on the other end of that conversation.

 

[jlai]

Yeah I want to know but I also don’t want to know

 

[pixie cut]

Just on a purely practical level, I’d point out that we have no idea who’s really behind most of the screen names here. I get trying to figure out who’s involved from the hints in the book because I did it too, and I know there are probably even some people here who have more inside dirt than that, but this is a really dicey thing to be discussing with anonymous strangers on the internet. For anyone who is naming names via PM, I would just be really careful you’re prepared for who might be on the other end of that conversation.

You didn't include that part of my post. I wouldn't be sharing speculation, for sure, or even fact with anonymous screen names. This is a serious subject. Know that the book's publisher vetted every word published. I wouldn't be shocked if FSU moderators locked down any conversation.

 

[Prancer]

I wouldn't be shocked if FSU moderators locked down any conversation.

We have no control over what people say in PMs.

It's tempting to lock this thread and others like it, but these discussions are important. People just need to recognize that there are some boundaries--and also that there is no such thing as total anonymity, here or anywhere else.

 

[pixie cut]

We have no control over what people say in PMs.

It's tempting to lock this thread and others like it, but these discussions are important. People just need to recognize that there are some boundaries--and also that there is no such thing as total anonymity, here or anywhere else.

The conversation is important. Speculation about the alleged assailant doesn't need to be a part of that.

 

[Trillian]

You didn't include that part of my post.

Sorry - I changed my train of thought midway through and left the wrong snip.

I wouldn't be sharing speculation, for sure, or even fact with anonymous screen names. This is a serious subject. Know that the book's publisher vetted every word published. I wouldn't be shocked if FSU moderators locked down any conversation.

I don’t know the law around this, but my gut feeling is that people who do have inside knowledge might end up in even more trouble if they accidentally share it with the wrong person.

Like I said, I understand trying to parse the clues. But for those of us who are primarily fans, we don’t actually need to know. Of course none of us wants to be cheering for a terrible person, but frankly, that’s the risk we take every time we get emotionally engaged with the work of a stranger.

The conversation is important. Speculation about the alleged assailant doesn't need to be a part of that.

Sometimes knowing the identity of a predator is relevant to the “how did he get away with this?” conversation, but honestly? Not usually that relevant. In the end it’s just some guy, and he got away with it for a lot of the same reasons they always do.

 

[Former Lurve Goddess]

Sorry - I changed my train of thought midway through and left the wrong snip.



I don’t know the law around this, but my gut feeling is that people who do have inside knowledge might end up in even more trouble if they accidentally share it with the wrong person.

Like I said, I understand trying to parse the clues. But for those of us who are primarily fans, we don’t actually need to know. Of course none of us wants to be cheering for a terrible person, but frankly, that’s the risk we take every time we get emotionally engaged with the work of a stranger.



Sometimes knowing the identity of a predator is relevant to the “how did he get away with this?” conversation, but honestly? Not usually that relevant. In the end it’s just some guy, and he got away with it for a lot of the same reasons they always do.

The "whisper network" is sometimes the only way that people can protect themselves and others from potential abusers, however, problematic and legally grey it may be.

 

[pixie cut]

The "whisper network" is sometimes the only way that people can protect themselves and others from potential abusers, however, problematic and legally grey it may be.

That's fine if the people you're whispering to are fellow skaters who may come into direct contact with the alleged person in similar situations. The whisper network does not include people with anonymous screen names on FSU.

 

[Trillian]

The "whisper network" is sometimes the only way that people can protect themselves and others from potential abusers, however, problematic and legally grey it may be.

I totally agree and I felt from reading the book that Gracie wanted him to be identifiable to people in the skating world, probably for that reason.

But I would guess people in the skating world already know who he is. So the “whisper network” in this case might mostly consist of fans, who are probably not at significant risk from this person as a general rule. We all want to feel good that we’re not cheering for a rapist (at least until the next one gets outed) but for most of us, there’s no real reason we need to have his identity confirmed.