IMHO, Megalopolis is the worst movie of 2024.
I know I had already given Challengers a 3.0/10, and I still stand by that review of though it seems like the "official critics" thought it was AMAZING, but at least Challengers was a solid (although bad) story. This was completely incoherent.
My score for Megalopolis, depending on how you look at it, is either 1.5/10 or Incomplete. The 1.5 was for what I actually watched. The Incomplete was for the fact that I walked out about an hour into the film.
The movie opens up with “Megalopolis: A Fable”. I think Coppola is trying to parallel the U.S. to Ancient Rome. New York is renamed as New Rome. Adam Driver plays Cesar, an architect, who has created a design of "Megalopolis” that basically looks like a playground of random junk. But apparently, Cesar is some "Godfather" that has a cult of personality. All Cesar thinks about is how Megalopolis is "The Future!!!!" and he knows this because he has the power to stop time. We don't know how Cesar got this ability or what good it will be far. Cesar's popularity puts him at odds with New Rome's Mayor Cicero (Giancarlo Esposito) because the mayor is "too stuck in the past". The mayor is also in trouble in the city because New Rome is crippled with massive debt.
Cesar is tortured from the death of his wife and it appears that Cicero had framed him for her death. The rivalry between Cesar and Cicero gets worse when a romance starts between Caesar and Cicero's daughter (Nathalie Emmanuel).
At no point did any of Coppola's "thoughts" become fully completed. It's like they ALL stopped in mid-sentence.
Madison Square Garden is "The Coliseum" and there's a musical for the "virgin sweetheart" (Grace VanderWall) who is pledging her virginity as a fundraiser for New Rome. It looks like New Rome will be getting out of it's debt! BUT WAIT! There's a steamy scene exposed between her and Cesar! The horror! Cesar, who is laid out backstage being high, is taken out of The Coliseum.
Dustin Hoffman looked lost. Jon Voight looked even more lost. Shia LaBeouf is randomly in some toga drag, but he's not a performer in the Coliseum. None of this made sense.
Then Caesar, while he still knocked out high on the car ride home, is arrested for statutory rape of the Grace VanderWaal character. At that point, I decided to walk out. Because I didn't care anymore.
I'm sure some more hysterical stuff happened afterwards but I can't see it improving this film. AT ALL.
Hopefully, Joker: Folie à Deux will be a better film next week.