Gracie Gold's memoir published February 2024

[Trillian]

I loved it when women began wearing workout attire during official practices rather than fancy practice costumes. Honestly, many of them looked much better in workout attire than in their performance costumes.

I remember reading an interview with Michelle Kwan in a fashion blog or magazine in recent years, and she was laughing about the fact that she used to get a lot of flack for wearing leggings instead of dance skirts to practice in the 90s. She thought it was funny that the basic black leggings that are ubiquitous now raised so many eyebrows when she wore them. But in retrospect, she was probably one of the few women with enough clout to say, “Yeah, I’m not going to do that” without repercussions.

 

[overedge]

At the time, the higher ups wanted her to look more WASPy. A nose job was suggested. They also had issues with her hair

IIRC Debi Thomas was also told she should get a nose job, for the same reason. And Linda Fratianne did get a nose job.

 

[Allskate]

But they don't direct the day to day and what gets posted on official social channels and I can guarantee there are plenty of high-ups in USFS and clubs that are clutching pearls over many things about current skating culture, out LGBTQ skaters probably one of them (unfortunately).

I don't doubt that. I just don't believe that the USFS is giving Amber a hard time because she is bi though I understand why she was concerned about coming out. And, more to the point that was raised here, I don't think they are singling her out for the way she dresses at practice and expecting her to wear white gloves.

And, even more to the point of this thread, I don't get the focus on practice outfits when there are much bigger issues currently taking place in skating and much bigger issues for Gracie, who is the subject of this thread.

 

[canbelto]

Didn't the judges also want Nancy Kerrigan to cap her teeth? Tell me I'm not hallucinating about that.

 

[overedge]

Didn't the judges also want Nancy Kerrigan to cap her teeth? Tell me I'm not hallucinating about that.

I don't know if the judges wanted her to, but her coaches (the Scotvolds) wanted her to, and she did it. They thought it would make her more marketable for endorsements etc and also build the "American ice princess" image they were promoting.

 

[overedge]

Anven more to the point of this thread, I don't get the focus on practice outfits when there are much bigger issues currently taking place in skating and much bigger issues for Gracie, who is the subject of this thread.

Because the expectations for how female skaters should look and behave, on and off the ice, are part of what contributed to Gracie's negative experiences.

 

[Coco]

A lot of this push towards "sparkle" is like a snowball, and it exacerbates each person's feelings of inadequacy and how they handle their feelings of inadequacy.

One skater or parent can hear 'wear more eye makeup and get highlights' and another can hear "you will never be good enough but because you'll never give up, max out your credit card to get a nose job, cosmetic dental work, starve yourself and rent luxury cars when attending competitions.'

 

[Sylvia]

For anyone in the Chicago area who might be interested:

Signing Line with Gracie Gold/Outofshapeworthlessloser

Join Anderson’s Bookshop for an in-person event with author Gracie Gold , to celebrate the release of Outofshapeworthlessloser , on Sunday, February 25th at...

www.eventcombo.com

“Join Anderson’s Bookshop for an in-person event with author Gracie Gold, to celebrate the release of Outofshapeworthlessloser, on Sunday, February 25th at 4pm in our Naperville Store.

Event Format

• Signing & Photo Line

Pre-registration is required for this event because space is limited.”

ETA a link to Gracie's photo from her booksigning last Sunday in Ridgewood, New Jersey: https://www.instagram.com/p/C3izhuOO4oD/

 

[AngieNikodinovLove (ANL)]

For anyone in the Chicago area who might be interested:

Signing Line with Gracie Gold/Outofshapeworthlessloser

Join Anderson’s Bookshop for an in-person event with author Gracie Gold , to celebrate the release of Outofshapeworthlessloser , on Sunday, February 25th at...

www.eventcombo.com

“Join Anderson’s Bookshop for an in-person event with author Gracie Gold, to celebrate the release of Outofshapeworthlessloser, on Sunday, February 25th at 4pm in our Naperville Store.

Event Format

• Signing & Photo Line

Pre-registration is required for this event because space is limited.”

Oh my gosh years ago, I almost took an apartment around the corner.

 

[Allskate]

Because the expectations for how female skaters should look and behave, on and off the ice, are part of what contributed to Gracie's negative experiences.

I'm nor denying that at all. But, Gracie was expected to wear white gloves at practice? As I said, according to her book, there are more significant issues that affected Gracie. Reaching back to events and expectations of over 25 years ago is unnecessary and unproductive, IMO. We need to deal with the here and now. There definitely are unhealthy expectations now, so how about we address those?

 

[overedge]

I'm nor denying that at all. But, Gracie was expected to wear white gloves at practice? As I said, according to her book, there are more significant issues that affected Gracie. Reaching back to events and expectations of over 25 years ago is unnecessary and unproductive, IMO. We need to deal with the here and now. There definitely are unhealthy expectations now, so how about we address those?

No one said Gracie was expected to wear white gloves in practice, or that anyone ever was. I mentioned the white gloves, and I mentioned them as part of the stereotype of a "nice girl" in the 50s - a stereotype that is still very present in skating.

As mentioned earlier, many of the powers that be were around more than 25 years ago, were around when Gracie was competing, and are still involved in the sport in various capacities. So these attitudes, as dangerous and outdated as they are, are still around.

People who are more recent fans may not know that skaters have been asked to alter their physical appearance to fit the "nice girl" stereotype. And that skaters have actually had nose jobs and teeth capping to look more like they're expected to look. That's important IMO in understanding the strength of the expectations that Gracie and other skaters have faced.

 

[Allskate]

People who are more recent fans may not know that skaters have been asked to alter their physical appearance to fit the "nice girl" stereotype. And that skaters have actually had nose jobs and teeth capping to look more like they're expected to look. That's important IMO in understanding the strength of the expectations that Gracie and other skaters have faced.

People were talking about white gloves and practice costumes and expectations from the eighties and nineties as if that is the state today. As someone who has been a skating fan for close to forty years, I think it is more productive to actually address the spceific things Gracie complained about and the current state of skating and expectations. I think that is more productive than talking about Linda Frattiane's nose job. You obviously have a different perspective.

Also, I think it is very important to understand that much of Gracie's eating disorder, which has been such a huge issue for her, is not about looks, and she generally does not discuss it that way. I don't think most coaches who emphasize weight are doing it because of appearance. I think they are doing it because they perceive it as performance-related. Gracie clearly thinks that was the case. She refers to the sport as a lightweight sport. There are other factors for her eating disorder as well, including a desire for control. IMO, eating disorders are still a major problem today.

 

[overedge]

I completely disagree that most coaches who tell their skaters to lose weight are doing it for performance-related reasons. Most coaches don't have enough training (or any training) in sports physiology to be able to make that sort of assessment - and if anything losing weight may make a skater too weak to do the more difficult elements reliably.

Coaches know that female skaters are expected to appear slim and feminine. That's where that advice is coming from.

 

[Aceon6]

I completely disagree that most coaches who tell their skaters to lose weight are doing it for performance-related reasons. Most coaches don't have enough training (or any training) in sports physiology to be able to make that sort of assessment - and if anything losing weight may make a skater too weak to do the more difficult elements reliably.

Coaches know that female skaters are expected to appear slim and feminine. That's where that advice is coming from

I train at a gym with a trainer who has some figure skaters as clients. He’s working on a formula that would allow him to monitor strength to weight ratios that allow the skaters to get the most hang time. He’s very much a “one pound at a time” guy. He says that most of the coaches understand neither basic physics nor physiology. There are exceptions, but it frustrates him that he has to explain things over and over to these supposed “experts” when he’s fairly certain that a pound or two of glute or quad mass would really help a skater.

 

[MacMadame]

While it's true some people involved in the sport 45 years ago are still around, many are not. There are judges who not only are gay but are married and completely out. There are younger judges who grew up listening to rock music. It's a mixture and USFS is not a monolith.

I'm not saying that nothing toxic is going on. I just get annoyed when people refer to judges and/or USFS as if they operate with one hive mind.

If figure skating wants to change and become healthier, it needs to educate everyone involved (skaters, coaches, parents, judges, officials, etc) and it needs to encourage the voices who don't have this restrictive, toxic approach. They are there!

 

[Trillian]

I completely disagree that most coaches who tell their skaters to lose weight are doing it for performance-related reasons. Most coaches don't have enough training (or any training) in sports physiology to be able to make that sort of assessment - and if anything losing weight may make a skater too weak to do the more difficult elements reliably.

Coaches know that female skaters are expected to appear slim and feminine. That's where that advice is coming from

I think the point is that the weight issues are often based on the perception that losing weight will improve performance - not that those ideas are necessarily valid. This is a tricky one in skating because there’s still very much a component of aesthetic preference involved in the pressure for skaters to lose weight, but it’s less socially acceptable to say that out loud anymore, so those conversations have shifted to being about performance even if the science doesn’t support that logic. I know ballet dancers have said the word “fit” has replaced “thin” in their world - so now they’re told they need to be “more fit” and everyone understands that’s code for “more thin.” I think it’s the same in skating.

So, I’d imagine it still varies a lot depending on the person, but that new framing has convinced a lot of people in skating that weight loss will help them improve their performance. And I got the impression that in Gracie’s case, that was definitely at play.

With that said, I also thought she made clear that the pressure to cultivate a certain image also contributed significantly to her problems. The exact nature of the ideal “ice princess” might have changed over the years, but the point is that the pressure to conform still exists and it’s harmful for the people who feel they can’t live up to it - which is almost everyone, in one way or another. Gracie made clear that this was a huge part of the reason she didn’t feel she could seek help for a long time, so I would say it’s certainly relevant to any serious discussion of the issues she raised.

 

[peibeck]

In the book, Gracie says her Chicago coach, Alex Ouriashev, said she struggled with jumps because her "ass was too big," when in reality many factors were in play, from body changes due to puberty, fatigue, anxiety (both performance and feeling her success was key to keeping her family together), and the beginning of her marked periods of depression. Add on top of that the coach's bouts with alcohol and being absent and wrong-headed on how Gracie's success was going to line his own pockets.

His Soviet era coaching helped her develop her powerful jumps, but in a lot of other ways he ignited a lot of her festering emotional problems which only grew over the years that followed. Gracie, sagaciously, doesn't lay all the blame at his feet, but notably remarks that under Alex's tutelage is where things started emotionally spinning out of control for her, even as her skating career was just starting to rise exponentially.

 

[JeffClair1979]

She does not name him. I don’t think she would be allowed to legally. Check your pm.

I feel dumb but I have not even a clue who it could be. Can I get a PM too pretty please?

 

[overedge]

I feel dumb but I have not even a clue who it could be. Can I get a PM too pretty please?

The mods have asked posters to contact people directly via PM, rather than post requests in the thread.

 

[JeffClair1979]

The mods have asked posters to contact people directly via PM, rather than post requests in the thread.

Sorry! I didn’t realize how behind I was in reading this thread Haven't gotten that far yet.

 

[bladesofgorey]

Also, I think it is very important to understand that much of Gracie's eating disorder, which has been such a huge issue for her, is not about looks, and she generally does not discuss it that way. I don't think most coaches who emphasize weight are doing it because of appearance. I think they are doing it because they perceive it as performance-related. Gracie clearly thinks that was the case. She refers to the sport as a lightweight sport. There are other factors for her eating disorder as well, including a desire for control. IMO, eating disorders are still a major problem today.

It absolutely has been about looks. Most coaches historically want their skaters to have a certain lean look, regardless of whether that thinness helps their skating or not. Being ballerina-thin has historically been the ideal, and when skaters with other body shapes have had huge jumps and excellent skills they've been derided as lacking gracefulness or "good lines".

 

[Ananas Astra]

It absolutely has been about looks. Most coaches historically want their skaters to have a certain lean look, regardless of whether that thinness helps their skating or not. Being ballerina-thin has historically been the ideal, and when skaters with other body shapes have had huge jumps and excellent skills they've been derided as lacking gracefulness or "good lines".

True dat.
The first one to defy this law was Irina Slutskaya in "modern" skating before figures was the most important part. Trixi Schuba wasn't a prima ballerina either.

 

[her grace]

The expectations of the past definitely play into what shaped Gracie Gold. She was constantly compared to Grace Kelly, who isn’t contemporary by any means.

 

[Ananas Astra]

The expectations of the past definitely play into what shaped Gracie Gold. She was constantly compared to Grace Kelly, who isn’t contemporary by any means.

Grace Kelly was uncomparable to anybody, as my late dad said.
Being compared to her was definitely losing in the first place.

Frank Carroll should have made her "The First Gracie Gold" instead of some cookie-cutter version of the unreachable Grace Kelly or whomever.

 

[4rkidz]

I completely disagree that most coaches who tell their skaters to lose weight are doing it for performance-related reasons. Most coaches don't have enough training (or any training) in sports physiology to be able to make that sort of assessment - and if anything losing weight may make a skater too weak to do the more difficult elements reliably.

Coaches know that female skaters are expected to appear slim and feminine. That's where that advice is coming from.

I have heard many coaches tell young skaters that “fat doesn’t fly” , in Canada coaches are required to have their coaching levels. Also judges are held accountable somewhat so the days of being a certain look over landing jumps has changed the past decade. The Russian skaters were basically starved in order to do quads as the slimmer they are the easier to rotate.

 

[overedge]

I have heard many coaches tell young skaters that “fat doesn’t fly” , in Canada coaches are required to have their coaching levels. Also judges are held accountable somewhat so the days of being a certain look over landing jumps has changed the past decade. The Russian skaters were basically starved in order to do quads as the slimmer they are the easier to rotate.

Yes, coaches are required to have their levels. But for some of them it seems to be a box checking exercise, and they just keep coaching in the abusive ways they always have. Younger coaches seem to take it more seriously IMO.

And please don't perpetuate the myth that only slimmer skaters can rotate faster.

 

[skatingguy]

I have heard many coaches tell young skaters that “fat doesn’t fly” , in Canada coaches are required to have their coaching levels. Also judges are held accountable somewhat so the days of being a certain look over landing jumps has changed the past decade. The Russian skaters were basically starved in order to do quads as the slimmer they are the easier to rotate.

They were/are starved to delay puberty because the jump technique that is being used only works with a particular body type, and once the body type changes the jump technique degrades.

 

[cheremary]

I just finished the book and it's really very well done. I'm surprised by her openness but also grateful that she has started the conversation on so many topics that should be addressed in figure skating. I remember chatting with her briefly at events and being initially surprised at how approachable and real she was, when her on-ice persona at the time seemed anything but...and I'm glad she's finally had the chance to tell her story in an authentic way and hopefully help change the culture around skating. One of the goals she wrote about in treatment was to "stay free and fearless in [her] authenticity and vulnerability," and I think she's done just that with this memoir.

I was curious what the last names of Susie and Jen were, the dietician and doctor who worked for US Figure Skating who helped her get treatment and whether they're still with USFS. (I assume Brandon, the strength and conditioning coach with USOPC is Brandon Siakel, who also worked with Nathan Chen?) I'm glad they were there and cared about her well-being beyond just her skating. I can understand why the last names and identities of certain people were left out, but in this case, they should be recognized for doing their jobs well and looking out for the person behind the athlete.

Also, does anyone know why Karen Crouse is not credited on the cover and only mentioned in the acknowledgements? Genuinely just wondering whether there's some unspoken rule if a certain percentage of the book was not ghostwritten, or if it's more likely a contractual thing, since most athlete memoirs are credited as being authored by the athete with the writer.

 

[Former Lurve Goddess]

Also, does anyone know why Karen Crouse is not credited on the cover and only mentioned in the acknowledgements? Genuinely just wondering whether there's some unspoken rule if a certain percentage of the book was not ghostwritten, or if it's more likely a contractual thing, since most athlete memoirs are credited as being authored by the athete with the writer.

Co-writer/ghost writer credits definitely depend on how the contract was drawn up. In some cases, the co-writer is contractually guaranteed to be credited on the front cover. But often for marketing purposes, a publisher may prefer that the celebrity get the cover/copyright page credits and the ghost just gets well-paid to be out of the spotlight.

 

[just tuned in]

How did Gracie's rivalry with Ashley Wagner affect her? In addition, many in the FS fan base were actively rooting against her in favor of Ashley. That has to be a challenge for anyone, to know that fans are rooting harder for someone else.