Gracie Gold's memoir published February 2024

[canbelto]

I agree @Sparks is right. The rivalry seemed a bit one-sided. I believe Tara spoke to Michelle during her infertility struggles. It's nice to see they moved on from whatever happened back then.

I love fans of MK thinking that she still hates Tara. If you've followed either of them on SM you'll know they follow each other and seem to be on good terms. Seriously, stop thinking rivals from 25 years ago need to still hate each other.

 

[pixie cut]

I love fans of MK thinking that she still hates Tara. If you've followed either of them on SM you'll know they follow each other and seem to be on good terms. Seriously, stop thinking rivals from 25 years ago need to still hate each other.

Especially since they're both women who became first time moms after age 40, they have something significant in common.

 

[AngieNikodinovLove (ANL)]

The crux of the Lipinskis' argument was that the USFS favored and pushed Kwan, even after Lipinski started routinely beating her in 1997

In some way it was one of those classic cases of opposites. Michelle Kwan, the graceful queen, who did have great technique up against the stunning technician who could do jumps that she could not. Kind of like the Nancy and Tonya situation Grace and artistry versus jumps and athleticism.

Now, having said all that I do think Tara was quite graceful and an artist, and Michelle Kwan certainly capable of a triple toe, triple toe, and great technique.

 

[canbelto]

Especially since they're both women who became first time moms after age 40, they have something significant in common.

MK frequently leaves comments under Tara's IG too. The two ladies are fine. And as you said, they both had an interesting journey to motherhood.
I think in general, figure skaters are a small group and they're closer than fans would like them to be. For instance I once saw Oksana Grishuk leave a long comment under Anthony Ponomarenko's IG that Anthony's mother Marina was the kindest, most wonderful person ever ... Back in the day G&P were rivals with K&P as well.

 

[cholla]

Why being rivals should necessarily mean hating one another? I know a lot of skaters who are rivals i.e. competing within a small group and who are on friendly terms off ice or during galas/shows. IAM dancers, Malinin and Siao Him Fa, and so on. I know fans love drama but skaters' lives are tough enough, most of them don't have time to waste energy on negative feelings. They are at worse indifferent, but the ones who truly hate one another's guts are the exceptions.

When I was a competitive freestyle skier, I had once a coach who called me a "fat cow" for an entire season. As an aerialist I was not supposed to be light as a feather anyway. But I was coming from alpine skiing, and I had the typical big thighs of a downhiller. To him that was a lethal sin. I went on a very strict diet for a few months and as a result... my thighs looked even bigger compared to the rest of my body because you don't chose the part of yourself that goes thinner. And I damaged my back because I had lost what I had: muscles. One day I finally yelled back at him: that's the way I'm built!! And his answer was: with willpower you can change the way you're built but it takes some work. I told him to feck off. Luckily for me, he was fired 1 week later. I was a competitive aerialist for much longer than he was a coach. But I wasn't the only one he had harassed about her/his weight and 2 of my team mates had given up and left. It was more than 30 years ago and I'm appalled things haven't changed.

 

[tony]

Fans want the drama and want two top skaters to have beef with each other. Some here might say they don't, but a lot of people 'live' for that type of stuff and always have. There are people constantly looking to see who is following/unfollowing who, for example.

I think it was easier pre-social media to come up with whatever storylines and theories one wanted, because we didn't get such an inside look on the skaters' lives or their comments sections. Butyrskaya and Slutskaya had a rivalry that built up so quickly, people started to believe Irina was behind the bombing of Maria's car during Russian Nationals one season. They have been very supportive of each other on Instagram as of late and I think they even commented in articles that it was this idea of a rivalry that built up without them ever really having negative feelings toward each other. Kwan and Lipinski, the same thing. They are very, very supportive of each other and the somewhat similar life patterns they have going on these days.

However, I am 100% sure that the Lysacek/Weir rivalry and seething annoyance of each other was actually very real. That Andrea Joyce couch interview with both of them was surely her peak moment. Yagudin and Plushenko as well. Evgeny was once asked, I think by Peter Carruthers, what he had learned from Alexei and he replied very quickly and dryly with "Nothing." ETA- I actually have that interview on my YT: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MgSwpLNFpu0#t=1m5s

 

[Sylvia]

From the end of Nick McCarvel's article about Gracie's book (Feb. 23): https://olympics.com/en/news/figure-skating-book-gracie-gold-exclusive-memoirs-comeback

“Any plans that I've made, even, like, two-year or five-year plans have literally never worked out in my whole life,” she tells us. “So I don't really make these anymore. I try to just make six months to maybe a year if we're feeling very confident.”
She spoke to Olympics.com from the U.S. Olympic training facility in Colorado Springs, Colorado, where she had just had a long-awaited hip surgery [in Dec. 2023] after a series of frustrations around the injury.
Is a comeback to competitive skating still on the cards?
“There could be,” she says. “I mean, that just entirely depends on how my hip does. I'm just waiting to see how all the rehab [goes] and getting back on the ice [to coach]. So that's a question I'll be able to accurately answer in May or June.”
“Last time I was [in Colorado], in 2017, I got sent to rehab,” she remembers. “So this time around... we're just here for physical rehab, which is great. And it's been pretty good. In my present life. I mean, I am enjoying... [And then] we'll see if skating competitively is in the cards, or if there are other opportunities out there for me.”

 

[kwanfan1818]

Why being rivals should necessarily mean hating one another? I know a lot of skaters who are rivals i.e. competing within a small group and who are on friendly terms off ice or during galas/shows. IAM dancers, Malinin and Siao Him Fa, and so on. I know fans love drama but skaters' lives are tough enough, most of them don't have time to waste energy on negative feelings. They are at worse indifferent, but the ones who truly hate one another's guts are the exceptions.

I think of all of the sports where they compete on a circuit and live on the road, like with skiing and ski jumping, and how awful it would be if everyone hated each other, because they were in each others' faces for months at a time. For skating, it's more day-to-day with whom they train(ed) -- so more of direct competition at IAM or in Tutberidze's group -- and also who their roommates are at international competitions, which international skaters they see at competitions and socialize with there, and with whom they perform in shows. Some people are just not going to like each other, whether they are truly rivals or even in the same discipline. But it would be harder than it is if that was the norm, even if skaters aren't together as much as in other sports circuits.

However, I am 100% sure that the Lysacek/Weir rivalry and seething annoyance of each other was actually very real. That Andrea Joyce couch interview with both of them was surely her peak moment. Yagudin and Plushenko as well.

Yagudin felt displaced after being the prince-in-waiting, so that's not surprising. But it's the coaches that are making decisions to take new skaters and/or to focus on them, some of whom may be the original skaters' direct competition at the highest level. Linichuk took Domnina/Shabalin, IAM took Virtue/Moir, and Kiliakov took Davis/Smolkin. Sometimes the skaters that were already there stay (Belbin/Agosto, Papadakis/Cizeron) and sometimes they leave (Green/Parsons). But the skaters don't necessarily hate the other skaters or even the coaches, even if they hate the decision.

 

[overedge]

In David Ortiz' autobiography about his baseball career, he says that everybody assumes that the Yankees and the Red Sox players hate each other, because of the long rivalry between those teams, and because of the rabid fans of each team who hate the other team. But in reality, because those two teams play against each other so often during the season, the players get to know each other and are quite friendly. Which must have been a "Michelle likes Tara" type shock to some of the more manic Yankees fans and Red Sox fans

 

[moonvine]

These are both true. If a skater is training in the U.S., SafeSport can take action. If the skater does not compete for the U.S. AND does not live/train in the U.S., then yes, there is not much they can do in the present. However, they can flag the individual (as they did with Sorenson) so if they do ever coach or train in the U.S., SafeSport can start an investigation.

With Cipres, SafeSport had no jurisdiction b/c he left the country so they focused on the coaches' actions, as they should have. But I am sure he is flagged, if he comes back to the U.S. and tries to coach. Of course, he wouldn't do that since there is a criminal complaint and he would presumably be arrested and formally charged.

Can they keep them from competing in the US?

 

[moonvine]

I just finished reading Gracie’s book. It is a powerful read. I had tickets to Boitano’s Lounge on Friday night in Columbus. Gracie was a special guest. There were complimentary copies of her book on every table which Gracie graciously autographed. When I got a moment to speak to her I mentioned I was in the arena at one of her competitions. I told her I was on my feet cheering before she finished her performance. She gave me that million dollar smile and said “You have no idea how much that means to me”. Now that I have read the book I truly understand the comment.

LOL she knows I give her a standing ovation even if no one else does. I doubt she knows my name but she definitely knows who I am since I give her roses at every competition. I did not go to Nationals because she did not qualify and I decided to go to SA instead. Silly me, she was there but not skating.

 

[Debbie S]

Can they keep them from competing in the US?

Which they and them are you referring to?

 

[skatingguy]

Can they keep them from competing in the US?

No

 

[moonvine]

In an attempt to change the subject, I wonder what people thought of Gracie's coach Vincent Restencourt sudden disappearance in Pennsylvania. I was shocked that he just...left town, leaving most of his possessions behind. His wikiwepdia entry ends with this, "He coached American figure skater Gracie Gold. Restencourt no longer coaches figure skating in Aston, PA."

I thought it was super weird and going from what she said in the book Gracie has no idea either. Whatever the case I'm grateful to him for coaching her to where he did.

 

[moonvine]

Which they and them are you referring to?

Sorry. If a person reports Skater X who is from Y non US country, can Safesport/USFS keep Skater X from competing in the US?

 

[Debbie S]

Sorry. If a person reports Skater X who is from Y non US country, can Safesport/USFS keep Skater X from competing in the US?

They can choose to not invite the skater to comps they control, like SA. If the skater is not under investigation/disciplinary action, they can't prevent them from coming to the U.S. to compete in a club comp or at an event like 4CC or Worlds where feds are allowed to send skaters they choose. I think Challengers/Senior B's are assigned by skater feds, so USFS may not have a say. But they could also communicate privately with the fed and ask them to send their skater elsewhere.

So if Worlds were in the U.S. this year, USFS couldn't prevent Sorensen from competing, for example. However, they could make a conscious decision not to invite him to SA (assuming they have another team in their seeding group they could choose).

Now, if a skater is facing a criminal complaint in the U.S., like Cipres, they would likely face legal issues if they came to the U.S. and would probably choose not to compete here, but that's independent of USFS.

Remember that USFS can't take any disciplinary action until SafeSport issues a ruling or temp suspension. What Gracie described in her book was a communication between her coaches and USFS, independent of anything that was happening with SafeSport. Her goal was to avoid the skater at comps, so part of that involved not sending her to comps where he would be, not just his invitations.

 

[moonvine]

I just finished the book and it's really very well done. I'm surprised by her openness but also grateful that she has started the conversation on so many topics that should be addressed in figure skating. I remember chatting with her briefly at events and being initially surprised at how approachable and real she was, when her on-ice persona at the time seemed anything but...and I'm glad she's finally had the chance to tell her story in an authentic way and hopefully help change the culture around skating. One of the goals she wrote about in treatment was to "stay free and fearless in [her] authenticity and vulnerability," and I think she's done just that with this memoir.

She is absolutely approachable. When I went to see her in Greensboro I could hardly talk and was choking stuff out. She stuck her hand out to shake and said "Hi, I'm Gracie." Now i practice what I will say. At the Ice Dreams tour there was a meet and greet for VIP ticket purchasers. There was a young girl behind me who started crying when she saw Gracie. Gracie came out from behind the autograph table and dried her tears and hugged her. It was very sweet.

 

[moonvine]

From the end of Nick McCarvel's article about Gracie's book (Feb. 23): https://olympics.com/en/news/figure-skating-book-gracie-gold-exclusive-memoirs-comeback

That's interesting. I saw another article that was much more positive towards her returning to competition if her hip allows. I really wonder if she would even have the time to train. I think this book is bigger than anyone thought it would be. It's certainly got the most buzz of any skating book I've ever read. I will be seeing her in September at the Road2Gold camp near me. Whoever runs the Road2Gold Instagram is really cool. I messaged her asking if I could just come get my book signed and she (or he!) was like sure!

 

[skateboy]

Received my hard copy on Friday, I'm nearly finished. Great autobiography!

I just finished the John Coughlin chapter and am so glad Gracie dedicated it to her dear friend and shared the beautiful letter he left for her. I've always felt awkward that after John's suicide, it was awfully quiet around here... no one seemed to grieve his passing.

Of course, I knew about the allegations -- as we all did -- but he was pretty much never mentioned again, as though he never existed. I'm glad Gracie didn't forget about him.

 

[Sparks]

I met JC. He was very charming and I thought he was so nice. Excuse me if I don't grieve his passing. He is not a victim.

 

[skatingguy]

Received my hard copy on Friday, I'm nearly finished. Great autobiography!

I just finished the John Coughlin chapter and am so glad Gracie dedicated it to her dear friend and shared the beautiful letter he left for her. I've always felt awkward that after John's suicide, it was awfully quiet around here... no one seemed to grieve his passing.

Of course, I knew about the allegations -- as we all did -- but he was pretty much never mentioned again, as though he never existed. I'm glad Gracie didn't forget about him.

He raped multiple women, and children - he ruined multiple lives - you want us to reminisce about his skating?

 

[canbelto]

Received my hard copy on Friday, I'm nearly finished. Great autobiography!

I just finished the John Coughlin chapter and am so glad Gracie dedicated it to her dear friend and shared the beautiful letter he left for her. I've always felt awkward that after John's suicide, it was awfully quiet around here... no one seemed to grieve his passing.

Of course, I knew about the allegations -- as we all did -- but he was pretty much never mentioned again, as though he never existed. I'm glad Gracie didn't forget about him.

Um I don't think you got the point of Gracie's chapter on him. Like at all.

 

[skateboy]

He raped multiple women, and children - he ruined multiple lives - you want us to reminisce about his skating?

Was rape actually proven? If so, I apologize. Were they seriously allegations of physical rape?

 

[skatingguy]

Was rape actually proven? If so, I apologize. Were they seriously allegations of physical rape?

He died before the case could be fully investigated, and yes they were serious allegations.

 

[Sparks]

Bridget Namiotka was a victim. JC was not

 

[leilaofpaper]

Was rape actually proven? If so, I apologize. Were they seriously allegations of physical rape?

There were at least four separate allegations, so it is incredibly unlikely that all were false.

 

[Alilou]

And at least two were children.

 

[Tangoer]

It is difficult to feel any grief for JC knowing what he did to Bridget Namiotka. May Bridget rest in peace. She never got justice for what he did to her. JC’s agent (I won’t say her name but it’s very pertinent to Gracie’s story) absolutely slandered Bridget and contributed to her death. It is devastating. It is understandable why Gracie struggles with the complex feelings that come from someone who she feels saved her life, taking the life of his victim. I think Gracie wrote her truth respectfully, even if it was hard to read.

 

[Theatregirl1122]

Was rape actually proven? If so, I apologize. Were they seriously allegations of physical rape?

What on earth distinction is being made with "physical rape"?


I don't remember it being quiet around here. In fact, the board was quite loud with people discussing how horrible his crimes were, how horrible Delilah's behavior was, etc. It just didn't include people mourning a sexual predator.

 

[canbelto]

Was rape actually proven? If so, I apologize. Were they seriously allegations of physical rape?

Define "proven." He's dead and one of his victims is also no longer with us. So it's impossible for things to be "proven." But yes, there were multiple credible accusations of SA and rape.