Tara Lipinski's podcast on infertility

Wyliefan

Ubering juniors against my will
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44,203
Many of my fellow Christians have tried to get the word out there about having children at younger ages, but IMHO, they've done it all wrong. They attach so much shame and blame and judgment to it. (As a childless woman, I'm so often on the receiving end of the "Welp, you missed your chance, you'll die alone and cats will eat your face, sucks to be you!" attitude.) It does far more harm than good.

Whereas, if people would just make it a point to talk honestly and without judgment about the biology of it all, maybe young aspiring parents would actually listen.
 

Coco

Rotating while Russian!
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So many young men I know are putting off marriage and kids because of housing costs and general $$$ issues, despite having worked regularly since high school and living simply. 30 years ago, I might have thought that was a bit of a pretext for other reasons, but now ... it's a really harsh economic reality out there for the under 40s.
 

skategal

Bunny mama
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12,060
It’s hard to get the message out there because as soon as someone tries, someone else pipes in with “my grandmother had babies until she was 48 and there is no reason I won’t be able to also.”

But the reality is you may be like your grandmother or you may not be and you have no idea which it is when you are 25…30…35.
 

dewey

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143
While I know that fertility drops off in a woman’s mid-thirties, infertility is not confined to people that age and older. I personally had friends who needed fertility assistance in their mid-20s and early 30s due to endometriosis and PCOS. Also, I recall seeing news articles about sperm counts dropping in men. People should be mindful of these realities before throwing around opinions that a woman (and it’s always the woman) “waited too long” to try to get pregnant.
 

manhn

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14,814
So many young men I know are putting off marriage and kids because of housing costs and general $$$ issues, despite having worked regularly since high school and living simply. 30 years ago, I might have thought that was a bit of a pretext for other reasons, but now ... it's a really harsh economic reality out there for the under 40s.

One of the key takeaways so far is the importance of employers and insurance companies to provide fertility procedures as part of a standard employment benefits package. I am not sure how Canada is doing in this regard.
 
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One of the key takeaways so far is the importance of employers and insurance companies to provide fertility procedures as part of a standard employment benefits package. I am not sure how Canada is doing in this regard.
The company my husband works for provides some benefits for fertility procedures. It certainly doesn’t cover everything though. A couple of his coworkers have been trying to have babies for awhile so it’s come up in the lunch room.
 

alexikeguchi

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While I know that fertility drops off in a woman’s mid-thirties, infertility is not confined to people that age and older. I personally had friends who needed fertility assistance in their mid-20s and early 30s due to endometriosis and PCOS.
Absolutely. I'm sure Tara will talk about it more in the upcoming episodes, but she probably had endometriosis for quite some time. She already mentioned that her periods didn't begin until she was in her mid 20s, and I doubt she was exercising intensively at that time since I believe she had retired from even professional skating several years earlier. Even if she didn't foresee marriage and children at that point, she should have been evaluated by a gynecologic endocrinologist anyway because it was a red flag that she wasn't having menstrual cycles.
 

Jimena

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Absolutely. I'm sure Tara will talk about it more in the upcoming episodes, but she probably had endometriosis for quite some time. She already mentioned that her periods didn't begin until she was in her mid 20s, and I doubt she was exercising intensively at that time since I believe she had retired from even professional skating several years earlier. Even if she didn't foresee marriage and children at that point, she should have been evaluated by a gynecologic endocrinologist anyway because it was a red flag that she wasn't having menstrual cycles.
That baffled me. In what medical world does that not trigger an evaluation? That's how low down the totem pole reproductive health can be found, I guess.

I listened to both episodes and I'm liking them so far. Both Tara and Todd come across very well.
 

mtnskater

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3,212
Really impressed with this podcast from Tara and Todd. As Todd said, Tara‘s personality is so perpetually upbeat he had never seen her depressed until this journey. It is a very riveting and personal account, even though it’s a subject I don’t have much interest in. My husband and I never wanted children and have had a great life and long term marriage without them.

I think Tara and Todd are really helping so many people by talking about this subject. Kudos to both of them and hugs too. I’m anxiously awaiting the next episodes to drop.
 

TanithandBenFan

Author of the Ice and Edge Series
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9,339
Really impressed with this podcast from Tara and Todd. As Todd said, Tara‘s personality is so perpetually upbeat he had never seen her depressed until this journey. It is a very riveting and personal account, even though it’s a subject I don’t have much interest in. My husband and I never wanted children and have had a great life and long term marriage without them.

I think Tara and Todd are really helping so many people by talking about this subject. Kudos to both of them and hugs too. I’m anxiously awaiting the next episodes to drop.
Same for me as the subject isn't relevant to me at all, but I'm greatly enjoying hearing their story. I feel like we're getting to see Tara's real personality through the podcast, and she and Todd have such a loving, fun rapport with each other. I'd like to see them do more projects together. I told a friend I'd rather listen to Tara and Todd commentate on skating together than Tara and Johnny.
 

Sylvia

TBD
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Tara posted this today: https://www.instagram.com/p/CxY0SPBym25/

Episode 7 is out! And this one figure skating fans will like.

We discussed how Michelle Kwan and I reconnected last year, over a topic that has obviously become so important to me. If you told me this 25 years ago when she and I were just little teenagers competing at the Olympics, I wouldn’t have believed you.

We have certainly seen each other through the years at events, but this re- connection was a special one.

I’ve always felt a bond with Michelle, how can I not? We have a shared experience together that is quite unique. We competed against each other at the highest level in sport during the height of figure skating popularity. I can explain to people what it feels like to skate to center ice at a competition but you kinda have to live it to understand. Now all these years later being able to have a supportive kinship/friendship and connection seems a bit unexpected in the best way possible.

Last year we had a longggg phone call that was truly beautiful in so many ways. To be able to be vulnerable and open up about these intimate and private moments while bonding through this conversation was very meaningful. It’s what life is about right? Sharing, supporting and building special relationships.

The funny thing is- Michelle and I were “considered” “rivals”. But we were just two elite athletes competing against each other. And during those years, many (thank goodness not all) figure skating fans intensely divided and became either “Michelle fans” or “Tara fans.” And to this day I still get some pretty hateful messages from disgruntled fans.

So what really makes me giggle is Michelle knows my entire story. I hadn’t told many people in my life until now and for all of you listening you are still not caught up yet to where we are currently in our story. But Michelle knows, and over the last year giving her these updates has made me think about what is so amazing about these interactions. Women supporting women. It’s so important. Life is hard and you never know what someone is going through behind closed doors, so be kind. Friendships between women that are supportive and uplifting can make this crazy world a better place.


Michelle's reply:
It’s so courageous for you to share your journey with others. I know it will help so many people to feel less alone as they deal with their own challenges🙏🏼
ETA the link to this podcast's YT channel: https://www.youtube.com/@TaraLipinskiUnexpecting
 
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Jimena

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I was so happy Tara talked about her conversation with Michelle. It made me happy that Michelle supported Tara when she needed it the most.

I have to say, I hope the podcast has a happy ending of some sort. At this point, with everything they've gone through, I just want them to have a baby!
 

Allskate

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12,813
I was so happy Tara talked about her conversation with Michelle. It made me happy that Michelle supported Tara when she needed it the most.

I have to say, I hope the podcast has a happy ending of some sort. At this point, with everything they've gone through, I just want them to have a baby!
I loved Tara's discussion of her conversation with Michelle. What a cool relationship they have. It's great that Tara has so much respect for Michelle and that Michelle was a source of confidence for Tara and made Tara feel heard.

Also, more importantly, after all the loss and emotional and physical distress, it's great that it seems like Tara and Todd finally are going to have a baby via a wonderful surrogate. There have been some hiccups during the surragacy, but I hope that they soon have a healthy baby.

I do wish their doctor had recommended that they see an immunologist and had done so years ago. Ditto for finding that septum. It might have saved them a lot of heartache and saved Tara a lot of procedures, physical pain, and anxiety. Hopefully, Tara sharing this information might lead others to obain this information more quickly.

Tara really is such a force, educating herself and advocating for herself and getting the diagnoses she needed. I hope this podcast inspires others to do the same.
 
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skategal

Bunny mama
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So happy for them that their surrogate is several weeks pregnant with their baby. :cheer2:

They have been using the word “baby” as opposed to “he/she” but when talking about the 20 week scan Tara said “He looked great.”

So maybe she let it slip that it’s a boy? :40beers:

Crossing fingers for a safe delivery.
 

TanithandBenFan

Author of the Ice and Edge Series
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9,339
So happy for them that their surrogate is several weeks pregnant with their baby. :cheer2:

They have been using the word “baby” as opposed to “he/she” but when talking about the 20 week scan Tara said “He looked great.”

So maybe she let it slip that it’s a boy? :40beers:

Crossing fingers for a safe delivery.
Tara said in an IG Q&A that she was referring to the doctor when she said “he” and wasn’t going to spill the information so easily 😄

It sounds like the transfer happened right before Nationals this year so she should be due very very soon!!
 

Allskate

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12,813
So happy for them that their surrogate is several weeks pregnant with their baby. :cheer2:

They have been using the word “baby” as opposed to “he/she” but when talking about the 20 week scan Tara said “He looked great.”

So maybe she let it slip that it’s a boy? :40beers:

Crossing fingers for a safe delivery.

Their latest podcast left me with the impression that they are very far along in the pregnancy. Quite a bit beyond the 20 week mark. An earlier podcast left me with the impression that the surrogacy transfer took place around a major skating competition, which sounds like Nationals. Poor Tara is so horribly afraid that something will go wrong that she mentioned she wished that the doctor could go in and get the baby now. She has been through so much. Listening to the podcast, there have been times that I have wanted to just reach through the screen and give her a hug.

I really respect how considerate she is of other people's feelings. Not just the surrogate, but other people dealing with infertility. She repeatedly makes it clear that her path and her choices might not be the same or right for other people and she really hopes that sharing her experience will help other people.

ETA: Here is a link to the IG story where Tara answers questions:


She confirms that the immunologist results are what led them to change to surrogacy. It's such a shame that their doctor hadn't recommended that testing.
 
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jackson

Active Member
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102
Their latest podcast left me with the impression that they are very far along in the pregnancy. Quite a bit beyond the 20 week mark. An earlier podcast left me with the impression that the surrogacy transfer took place around a major skating competition, which sounds like Nationals. Poor Tara is so horribly afraid that something will go wrong that she mentioned she wished that the doctor could go in and get the baby now. She has been through so much. Listening to the podcast, there have been times that I have wanted to just reach through the screen and give her a hug.

I really respect how considerate she is of other people's feelings. Not just the surrogate, but other people dealing with infertility. She repeatedly makes it clear that her path and her choices might not be the same or right for other people and she really hopes that sharing her experience will help other people.

ETA: Here is a link to the IG story where Tara answers questions:


She confirms that the immunologist results are what led them to change to surrogacy. It's such a shame that their doctor hadn't recommended that testing.
I am so happy for them that their dreams are coming true! With modern medicine I am so glad that many people who want to be moms, have the option if they are fortunate to do so.
 

skatfan

Well-Known Member
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8,448
So happy for them that their surrogate is several weeks pregnant with their baby. :cheer2:

They have been using the word “baby” as opposed to “he/she” but when talking about the 20 week scan Tara said “He looked great.”

So maybe she let it slip that it’s a boy? :40beers:

Crossing fingers for a safe delivery.
I think it was clear that the embryo was genetically male.
 

Allskate

Well-Known Member
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12,813
The latest podcast is a Q&A that they just recorded this week. (They have been working on the podcast for a year and most of the episodes were taped quite some time ago.) This episode made me really happy for them. It is the first time that Tara did not sound anxious and sad and instead sounded happy and excited. Tara finally was able to get past her fear and be optimistic enough to have a shower/party so I think the baby must be due pretty soon. Tara's Instagram posts this past week also have been sharing landmark points in the pregnancy, which makes me think that she is feeling less fearful, too.
 
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Stefanie

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3,287
Tara says there is going to be a big podcast episode tomorrow. Hmmm. Doing the math.

It's official!

Congrats to Tara!!! :)
 

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