Really, part deux

pat c

Well-Known Member
Messages
12,348
bumping up as I haven't done this in a while:

Cards
The mailing address is:
Cards_4_Lee
Bentley School
Box 299, 5314 - 49 Street
Bentley, Alberta,
T0C 0J0
 

Gerry

Well-Known Member
Messages
160
Hi Team!

I have really been slacking in my 'updating' role... sorry about that. Busy time of year.

Lee is still <surprise> in the hospital... and she is still doing OK. She is eating well, and sleeping a lot, but her recovery seems to be a bit 'stalled'... not really any fast changes. I am sort of torn between thinking that is a good or bad thing. On the one hand, I hope she continues to improve, but on the other, she isn't going downhill.

What has happened in the last month... (omg - 2 months!) since I last gave you an update? Well, the kids all came up for Christmas, and got to sit on Nannie's bed and open some presents and help her open hers... that was a real highlight, because for the last 3 Christmases, she has been sort of out of it. Her hands are quite contracted and she has lost a lot of dexterity, so opening presents was kind of reduced to a rip-and-tear thing... the littlest one kept encouraging her "you can DO it, Nannie, don't give up!". What do you get the woman who has everything? Socks. Lap Blankets. A supportive neck collar so her head stays uptight when she dozes in her wheelchair. 'Jammies. Pictures for her walls. So that was a good few days.

Her Principal showed up with a bunch of cards and had a nice visit again... she is interested to see how 'her' kids are doing, and surprised that some of them are graduating this year (they were in Grade 9 when this happened, and she still 'sees' them at that size. He is bringing newer pictures when he next visits, printed bigger so she can see them better.

I have been with her as much as I can; I try to help out the nurses and HCAs who are her primary care these days; her doc keeps an eye on things, but really, there hasn't been a whole lot of change. Every so often, she surprises somebody with something she says, which tells me she doesn't talk all that much when I'm not there. It would be easy to forget that she needs what every other adult needs - conversation, intellectual stimulation, threads to follow, things to attend to... this vision thing keeps her off the computer and the staff is just too busy to spend sustained time with her. Mealtimes are probably the most 'active' times for her - when I'm not there, she often tries to skip getting up and into the chair and going out to the dining room (they will bring her meals in to her and help her eat in bed if she asks, which was the game she was playing) but I put a stop to that - told them to use their discretion, but I wanted her up and out and about at least a couple times a day. Now they tell her "Gerry will be upset if we don't get you up" when she wants to just stay in bed. One nurse laughed and said "you should hear how she responded to that the other day!".

I can just imagine. She tells me off when I push things too far or too much with the rehab I'm working on, and I actually kind of like it when she does. If she didn't still have that spark, I would worry more.

Well, I gotta go back over there. I've been away a bunch, working, so try to hang out with her at every day, especially at mealtimes so I can help out and free up some staff. Our government has a full-on-frontal-assault going on Healthcare, (including Doctors - just tore up their collective agreement the other day, which REALLY got everyone's attention), so it would be easy for the staff to be disillusioned with their jobs. I can understand that, the government has the same assault going on against education, and the schools I work with need constant reminding that just because the government is noisy, it doesn't mean they are the voice of the people... that their jobs matter, that THEY matter, that the parents/students/patients appreciate them, even if the friggin politicians don't.

What IS it about 'Austerity' governments that they want to cut all public services and privatize everything? Haven't they friggin learned that doesn't save anything, yet? Ours keeps releasing these little facebook ads or tweets that talk about the waste, the high wages, the doctors and nurses and teachers make... and a percentage of the retards out there believe everything they read. Sigh. Does my frustration show?

Anyway, that's all for today's soap opera. Thanks for thinking about her, and for the cards you send. I read them all to her, and she tells me about where she has met you (or not), which is always encouraging. Lee has good friends.
 

Simone411

Do stand. Do stand six. Do stand six feet from me.
Messages
16,559
Thank you so much for the update, Gerry! So glad that Lee's still got that spunk! Keeping you and Lee in my thoughts and prayers, and God bless y'all! 💞💓
 

Spun Silver

Well-Known Member
Messages
11,570
Thank you for the update from the trenches, Gerry. It's great that Lee's holding her own and that you're working - even if she gets it secondhand the sense of the world outside her hospital room must be very good for her.

It sounds like Lee is still waiting for the cataract surgery (?). I hope the wait ends soon - it will be so good for her to be able to read and watch TV/skating again.

Hugs!
 

skatesindreams

Well-Known Member
Messages
29,936
Thank you for the update, Gerry.
The two of you are constantly in my thoughts.

I hope that over time, your frustrations will ease.
 

once_upon

New condo owner
Messages
13,336
Thanks for the updates. I hope Lee gets feisty with you every time you push her to do something. I know that she knows you have her best interests in mind.
 

aftershocks

Well-Known Member
Messages
16,755
Thanks for taking the time to update us Gerry. God bless you and Lee, and your family. No one can truly understand your personal journey, but I am reminded of my experience with being there for my Mom throughout several nursing homes some years back. What I remember is the love and connecting with her even when she was doing poorly, and especially on her best days. The memories of being there for her comfort me, and I wouldn't trade those memories for anything.

I hope things will progress increasingly in an even better direction for Lee. I'm so glad for what she and you have already weathered. The miracles and the blessings! Keeping you both in my prayers!
 

MINAM

The "NICE" Admin
Staff member
Messages
8,341
Thanks for giving us updates. My heart goes out for you two. I know that frustration. You just have to keep going.
 

Gerry

Well-Known Member
Messages
160
Thanks for the updates. I hope Lee gets feisty with you every time you push her to do something. I know that she knows you have her best interests in mind.
Yep... today, I was pushing her to stretch and she told me (in no uncertain terms) where to go, how to get there, and when to leave. I thought the Nurse was going to have a cow...
 

Simone411

Do stand. Do stand six. Do stand six feet from me.
Messages
16,559
Yep... today, I was pushing her to stretch and she told me (in no uncertain terms) where to go, how to get there, and when to leave. I thought the Nurse was going to have a cow...
Thanks so much for sharing that.

Gerry, I'd like to share something funny with you. I'll never forget the first day of my physical therapy. I had been in ICU for nearly a month. The physical therapist came in and said "We're getting you out of bed today". She had brought a walker, and I had a wound vac attached to my leg.

I remember telling her "I'll get up when the cow jumps over the moon, pigs actually grow wings and fly and when hell freezes over!" That didn't work. She got me out of the bed anyway. She made me walk over to a chair and sit in it that was about 5 feet to the right of my hospital bed. The physical therapist did laugh about what I said. She said that usually a patient just cussed her out so my excuse for not getting up was hilarious to her!
 

victorskid

Happily ignoring pontificators & know-it-alls
Messages
7,270
@Really and @Gerry - you continue to be in my prayers, especially in these most challenging times for everyone.

A week ago we were all wondering/worrying about the possible cancellation of the World Figure Skating Championships. Practices should have begun today. What a lot of changes have taken place in that short period of time!

We should all be trying to ensure that our "social distancing" contributes to the effort to slow down the progression of this *********. That should not lead to social isolation, however. We need to find all the means we can to stay in contact with others - to try to lift spirits, provide support, and share as many virtual ((((hugs)))) as we can.

You might enjoy the live concert Jann Arden did from home via Facebook today.
 

Gerry

Well-Known Member
Messages
160
Hi, Skatefans!

Lee and I continue along, as always. She is progressing, but it's still slow; the Hospital has locked the doors to all visitors, but the staff make sure we get online facetime daily, and are reporting to me that she is doing well. (yes, they rat her out when she isn't cooperative, and I get to give her hell). Not much else to say about that...

Me? I stay home. I tend to stay relatively stocked up on supplies, so no panic buying here.. it's a legacy of living 100 miles from nowhere for much of my life. What's with Hoarding Toilet Paper? If I run out and can't get more, I'm going to chop up some old towels and start up a diaper pail, just like when the kids were little. So I do a little more laundry... big deal. The young folks probably never heard of cloth diapers, even though they might have been raised in them.

People seem to be good with the Social Distancing thing, and so far, we are trying to be brave. Our schools are all closed, all standardized testing is halted, and people are learning what Lee's job is like, albeit with smaller class sizes. I shut down my consulting over a month ago, because I just couldn't risk picking something up and carrying it back to her.

Friends of mine (and my kids) are still working, but their businesses have taken measures to space people out (one business is giving employees every second day off, running half-shifts to keep the employee density down... people are washing hands and keeping their distance, following the lead of China, South Korea, and Japan, who are showing fewer new cases, despite much higher population density issues.

Our government still has the occasional brain fart, but they have been much better about supporting our Healthcare Heroes (<-- I MEAN that... I have always revered you guys, more so since you have been taking care of Lee, but even MORE now that you're on the front lines. Thank you. From the bottom of my heart. Really.)

My advice for all of you non-healthcare types is simple; stay home, where you can. Where you can't, take the simple precautions; wash your hands all the damn time, avoid touching your face, keep your distance. It's pretty simple; be Smart, be Intentional, and be Safe. This is a virus, not the Zombie Plague - it can't come and chase you down, and it can't get through your skin... You have to provide transport to your lungs. So don't do that.

I'm beating the 'wash all the time' thing by NOT using my dishwasher (yep, in the sink with soapy water!), and by cleaning house (Lee would be so proud of me). I'm keeping my distance by being a reclusive hermit. Somebody the other day posted "I used to cough to cover a Fart... now I Fart to cover a cough". <<-- That's me.

I sure wish I could go hold Lee, but for now, I am not going to take even the remote chance of me carrying something in to her. I watch your TV stations, showing that ignorant punk on the beach in Florida, saying "If I get *********, I get *********. It's not going to stop me from partying" and I wonder how stupid and self-centred somebody has to be to do that... the mind boggles. They should have just waited until the beach was full of partyers, then fenced it off.

Anyway, be well, my friends. My prayers are with you all, just like yours have been with us for so long.
 

aftershocks

Well-Known Member
Messages
16,755
ITA 110% with you @Gerry re the strange tendency some people have to hoard toilet paper. I always keep a sufficient supply anyway, so I don't need to run out grab a lot from shelves. If there's ever a real situation with running out and not being able to get any (which I doubt will happen with stores so far being re-stocked), you are right about there being other reasonable alternatives.

We need to be creative thinkers, positive thinkers, and think along lines of what is really necessary, and not engage in hoarding.

I sympathize with you not being able to hold Lee at this time. I hope the time you are physically parted passes quickly, and that you will be sustained by being able to Facetime with her. :) My best to you and Lee, and to your family! As life moves from one crisis to another these days, you and Lee continue to be an inspiration! Thank you as always for taking the time to share with us. ♥
 

Skate Talker

Well-Known Member
Messages
7,439
I have only posted her a couple of times but always make sure to keep up with this thread. About 20 years ago my father had a cerebral aneurysm and given that experience, I have always found the way you cope admirable and inspiring. Your latest post was no exception.

Wonderful calming words, Gerry, and sound advice. All the best to you, Lee, your family, and Lee's caregivers. As always your levelheadedness and ability to calmly cope with what you are dealt amazes me.

I also have a habit of always having extra on hand due to growing up where going to the grocery store was not a simple trip up the block. The chance of a bad winter storm or malfunctioning vehicles meant it was better not to take chances of being caught short.

By the way, wouldn't our ancestors be astonished at our mass hysteria over those little white rolls of tissue.
 

nekkidgator

Active Member
Messages
512
I don't know you or Lee, but I've seen this thread consistently for a few years. I'm adding you to my prayers, as small and inconsequential as that is. We all need some prayers and encouragement right now, but you guys are extra deserving. Anyone who reads any updates has learned what true love and devotion is. I have, so thank you for that. May the Lord bless you and keep you, and darn it, let's have a miracle already. That's what I'll be praying for.
 

NeilJLeonard

Well-Known Member
Messages
4,250
Thanks, Gerry. As ever my best to you both. I hope that someday she can actually get to go home.

NJL (Where the toilet paper shortage is such that I've not seen any on store shelves for weeks..)
 

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