Josh Duggar ('19 Kids and Counting') Arrested by Feds

[skategal]

We used to be against both homeschooling and private schooling and a huge advocate for public schooling.

We’ve now considered both Homeschooling and private schooling for DS for Junior High and will not be putting him in Public School for Junior High for a variety of reasons (not the least of which is the amount of racial bullying that takes place there.)

The jury is still out on if we will go private or homeschool, but two weeks back to online learning during our lockdown and private is winning.

 

[Coco]

There are some really good companies that assist with homeschooling. And the internet lets you find other homeschoolers near you for field trips and group activities.

I have seen articles from parents of children who are not white, I don't know what the proper term is anymore, who said that the shift to online learning has spared their children from dealing with racism. They've seen noticeable changes in their personalities and demeanors.

Segregation is a problem, but if it were my kid, I would not want them to be on the front lines in an institution with predominantly white teachers and white administrators.

 

[millyskate]

I think I read recently that homeschooling is now illegal in France? I am I right in that? As I understand it, it’s part of Macron’s efforts to combat religious extremism.

It's due to be implemented in 2022, and might have been postponed by a year I think. There has been quite a bit of backlash from the few alternative education communities in France. I imagine the CNED, which is managed by the department for education and caters to young athletes, musicians and children who are suffering long-term illnesses, would still be allowed.

ETA: this article indicates that initially, only health reasons could have justified home education but they're now specifying that it has to be "in the overarching interest of the child" and that political, religious or philosophical motives could not be used. Each child will be given an educational reference number.

La fin de l'instruction en famille reportée d'un an - VousNousIls Primaire

La fin de l'école à la maison n'est peut-être plus si proche : c'est désormais "l'intérêt supérieur de l'enfant" qui devra prévaloir.

www.vousnousils.fr

Apparently, 50000 children in France are currently homeschooled. They are inspected every year to ensure they meet the required standard in core subjects. If the inspector judges the level inadequate, they are given a period of time to improve and if there is no improvement, they are required to attend public school.
I know a US family living in France and homeschooling their children who got caught out by this They were pretty shell-shocked. In the end they sent their children to a private boarding school in Germany.

 

[skategal]

There are some really good companies that assist with homeschooling. And the internet lets you find other homeschoolers near you for field trips and group activities.

I have seen articles from parents of children who are not white, I don't know what the proper term is anymore, who said that the shift to online learning has spared their children from dealing with racism. They've seen noticeable changes in their personalities and demeanors.

Segregation is a problem, but if it were my kid, I would not want them to be on the front lines in an institution with predominantly white teachers and white administrators.

We haven’t had any issues at all with the elementary school which is becoming more and more diverse each year and we hear high schools are good with lots of diversity but the junior high schools throughout the city are the weak link.

Many diverse families are also choosing private schooling.

There is a lot of private schools here as well as a growing homeschool segment.

DS is very social so I’m not sure he would do well with the homeschooling unless I wasn’t working and could make the social piece a priority.

We do have homeschool co-ops here with group activities to get the social interaction.

 

[quartz]

I’m the product of 12 years of private Christian schooling, and there were many personal issues that got in the way of my education throughout those years. My tendency to slaughter all grammar “rules” is due to missing out on a big chunk of grade 3 when I lost my hearing. Also, I despise my grade 3 teacher and don’t give a shit about anything she taught me, as she had an affair and ran off with the school principal, who happened to be my father. I did get pulled out of school when that happened, as the bullying and ostracization was getting to be ridiculous.
You may use me as a cautionary tale - no one wants to turn out like me. ?

 

[skategal]

I’m the product of 12 years of private Christian schooling, and there were many personal issues that got in the way of my education throughout those years. My tendency to slaughter all grammar “rules” is due to missing out on a big chunk of grade 3 when I lost my hearing. Also, I despise my grade 3 teacher and don’t give a shit about anything she taught me, as she had an affair and ran off with the school principal, who happened to be my father. I did get pulled out of school when that happened, as the bullying and ostracization was getting to be ridiculous.
You may use me as a cautionary tale - no one wants to turn out like me. ?

My husband and I are also the products of 12 years of Christian school (different denominations, not private).

There are many things we
wish were different but overall it was a good experience.

However, we will not be choosing Christian schooling for our son despite being practicing Christians.

We are strong believers in separation of church and state and that religion belongs in church and the home, not in schools.

 

[ilovepaydays]

I’m the product of 12 years of private Christian schooling, and there were many personal issues that got in the way of my education throughout those years. My tendency to slaughter all grammar “rules” is due to missing out on a big chunk of grade 3 when I lost my hearing. Also, I despise my grade 3 teacher and don’t give a shit about anything she taught me, as she had an affair and ran off with the school principal, who happened to be my father. I did get pulled out of school when that happened, as the bullying and ostracization was getting to be ridiculous.
You may use me as a cautionary tale - no one wants to turn out like me. ?

Yikes! ?

I have very similar stories from my time in K-12 public school. The bullying was horrendous - and unless the parents got REALLY got involved, the schools did pretty much nothing. And from about the 7th grade on, at no point did I make it six months without a story about a teacher or other school employee having an affair with school leadership or even school board members (who in most districts are usually elected). And then there’s the cases of teachers being inappropriate with minor aged students. Keep in mind that this is a small town in Arkansas of about 10,000 people. And that’s just the stories I know about........

Honestly, I’m shocked at the number of parents who don’t keep their eyes peeled about everyone who interacts with their children. It’s like they are too easy (or maybe even lazy) to blindly trust.
————————————

Back to the Duggars, if you are interested in some ? - Jill’s husband, Derick Dillard,
(derickmdillard) has been responding to tweets about the TLC shows and what he has been saying is fascinating.

 

[CassAgain]

People lecturing Derrick about the inner dynamics of the family he married into and obviously knows much more about is

 

[genevieve]

I have seen articles from parents of children who are not white, I don't know what the proper term is anymore, who said that the shift to online learning has spared their children from dealing with racism. They've seen noticeable changes in their personalities and demeanors.

My organization works with a lot of nonprofits that provide direct services to BIPOC (I think that's the term you were looking for) communities, many focusing on education, and this is the feedback we have been getting, overwhelmingly. BIPOC students are still enrolled in institutions that have predominantly white teachers, administrators and other students (that is a very important component), but the separation of attending online has provided a barrier that greatly improves their quality of life and education.

 

[million$momma]

My husband was homeschooled from grades 1-5. His kindergarten teacher told his parents that he was "retarted" because he couldn't do anything she said and he never paid attention to her. He was held back a year, then by the time he made it to first grade they found out that he was deaf. His mother was furious that so-called professionals couldn't figure out that it wasn't his intellect that prevented him from learning, it was the fact that he couldn't hear his teachers. His mother homeschooled him & his siblings for a while, but one of his sisters has severe behavioral/psychological issues that his mom couldn't handle by herself. My husband was sent to the Texas School for the Deaf from grades 6-10, but he didn't like it there so he was finally allowed to finish school at the local public high school. Some of his teachers still didn't believe that he was deaf so they didn't always give him the accomodations he needed, but he was able to do well enough to graduate at least. His family isn't religious, but if you've seen some of my posts on PI, they are suuuuuuuuper rightwing. They don't trust "educated elites" at all, so they actually talked him out of ever going to college and they make fun of ME for having a bachelors degree. One of his sisters is super duper Q-Anon brainwashed and tried to homeschool her son for a year and it was a total disaster. She gets really overwhelmed very quickly and just couldn't keep it under control. He went back to regular school in the 4th grade until the p-demic hit and then switched to distanced learning. She seems to like it better since he's at home and not getting abducted by billionaires or whatever it is she believes, but he's got actual teachers helping him and she doesn't have to split all of her attention to keeping him engaged and learning but also dealing with her younger kid (toddler-aged).

Interesting how quickly the mom attacked the teacher for not noticing that her son was deaf...The child made it to age 6/7 without the mother noticing as well...

 

[quartz]

When I went deaf in my left ear (due to a virus), my mom told me God was punishing me for having Satan in my heart. Then she took me to a faith healer to cure me. Didn’t work. So she told me that was my fault too for not believing hard enough in Jesus. ??‍

 

[Amy L]

Interesting how quickly the mom attacked the teacher for not noticing that her son was deaf...The child made it to age 6/7 without the mother noticing as well...

He wasn't born deaf, he was born with nerve damage that slowly diminished his hearing. Lord knows I have a lot of criticisms for my in-laws, but it probably happened slowly enough that they kind of got used to his "not listening" and equating it to him being a hyperactive little kid. His mom is, let's say, not great with authority figures, so of course she'd put all the blame on the teacher not noticing when her typical modus operandi would be saying something like "teacher thinks she knows stuff and didn't notice this".

 

[overedge]

Back to the Duggars, if you are interested in some ? - Jill’s husband, Derick Dillard,
(derickmdillard) has been responding to tweets about the TLC shows and what he has been saying is fascinating.

I'm quite shocked that the "Counting On" couples didn't get any payment for being on the show. I would think that Jim Bob would want to keep his cash cows family happy and productive, and at least give them a token amount of money.

 

[Coco]

Money = freedom and independence

 

[overedge]

Money = freedom and independence

True that. I was thinking just enough money to keep them quiet, not enough to finance an escape.

 

[Tesla]

True that. I was thinking just enough money to keep them quiet, not enough to finance an escape.

That’s what things are for (houses, car lots, etc.).

 

[MacMadame]

That’s what things are for (houses, car lots, etc.).

Paying the hospital bills when your daughter has a rough birth...

 

[Lacey]

When I went deaf in my left ear (due to a *****), my mom told me God was punishing me for having Satan in my heart. Then she took me to a faith healer to cure me. Didn’t work. So she told me that was my fault too for not believing hard enough in Jesus. ??‍

OMG, @quartz, your story (with the teacher/your dad the principal affair part above and now this deafness issue) is amazing. I hope you are proud of yourself for turning out so well.

 

[Vagabond]

True that. I was thinking just enough money to keep them quiet, not enough to finance an escape.

This calls to mind various Biblical verses about looking after those in need, such as "But whoever has the world’s goods, and sees his brother in need and closes his heart against him, how does the love of God abide in him?" (John 3:17, New American Standard Bible).

(IIRC, there was someone who used to use John 3:17 as her user name here. I wonder what she thinks about the Duggars.)

 

[MacMadame]

(IIRC, there was someone who used to use John 3:17 as her user name here. I wonder what she thinks about the Duggars.)

I think it was John 3:16. That's the one fundamentalist put on signs all the time.

 

[Vagabond]

I think it was John 3:16. That's the one fundamentalist put on signs all the time.

You might be right.

I still wonder what that poster thinks about the Duggars.

 

[millyskate]

I think it was John 3:16. That's the one fundamentalist put on signs all the time.

I’m pretty sure @Vagabond remembered right and the user had John 3:17 as her username.

 

[VGThuy]

With all this talk about homeschooling, my curriculum would include figure skating education with an emphasis on Kwanism.

 

[once_upon]

I think it was John 3:16. That's the one fundamentalist put on signs all the time.

No, did a search the poster was John 3 17

 

[FiveRinger]

This calls to mind various Biblical verses about looking after those in need, such as "But whoever has the world’s goods, and sees his brother in need and closes his heart against him, how does the love of God abide in him?" (John 3:17, New American Standard Bible).

(IIRC, there was someone who used to use John 3:17 as her user name here. I wonder what she thinks about the Duggars.)

No offense, but my grandmother used to tell me that the devil can quote scriptures just as well as anyone else.

 

[Vagabond]

No offense, but my grandmother used to tell me that the devil can quote scriptures just as well as anyone else.

How did she know? Were they personally acquainted?

 

[MacMadame]

No, did a search the poster was John 3 17

I must have remembered it wrong.

 

[overedge]

According to Jinger's new book, Jim Bob and the family took off in the middle of the night to escape the paparazzi when the original charges were revealed in 2015

Jinger Vuolo says Duggar family fled Arkansas in dead of night

In 2015, Josh Duggar was accused of repeatedly molesting five underage girls including four of his sisters.

www.today.com

It's but maybe not surprising that the implicit perspective in these excerpts seems to be "We had forgiven Josh so why was this a big deal".

 

[ЭPiKUilyam]

It's but maybe not surprising that the implicit perspective in these excerpts seems to be "We had forgiven Josh so why was this a big deal".

I try to put myself in their position as parents. If my son were sexually abusing his sisters, what would I do? I wouldn't go to the police. I'd try to manage it quietly, but psychiatric care would be the priority. If a psychiatrist has a duty to report, then so be it. Then he would at least be in the "system" for sex abusers and get the treatment he needs. It all could be confidential and the record expunged at 18. The problem I see is that the Duggars are extremely arrogant. Josh was their king of the brood. They wouldn't consider Josh being treated for pedophilia so he suffered really no consequences. Reading more on Josh, he was extremely arrogant and a loudmouth when he moved to D.C. Disrespected anyone beneath his "level". Basically, a S-head that deserved a comeuppance.

I can understand Jinjer's feeling, that it was long past, forgiveness was given to the abuser, and she moved on. That's healthy. She's obviously been in meaningful therapy. I'm not bothered by her reactions.

 

[overedge]

@ErikWilliam my concern with the forgiveness is that, in their religious practice, it seems to be the responsibility of the girl/woman who was abused to fix the situation by offering forgiveness - not the responsibility of the abuser to change their ways.