Coughlin's Former Pairs Partner Alleges He Abused Her

[thvu]

That people don't get that she was speaking specifically about John and not their cousin, uncle, son, husband....is indicative of the level of their intelligence and analytical capacities. Sad.

Nobody means not a single person. It's one thing to say that there is an interpretation that makes the most sense given the situation and the context. It's completely another thing to attack the intelligence and analytical capacities of others for reading what is said plainly.

Even the subtext that you are reading is, at the end of the day, an assumption. So, while everyone else here is taking this in and speaking from a personal place, maybe you shouldn't be going around being unnecessarily (and ignorantly) insulting.

 

[coppertop1]

It’s possible they’re not skating fans and know nothing about Coughlin. There’s a band of men’s rights activists on social media, big Trumpies and virulently anti-#MeToo, who go after harassment and assault victims ideologically. They’re the lowest of the low.

Yep. The whole #himtoo movement. Just look at how Dr Blasey Ford was treated after testifying against Kavanaugh. Yet, people criticize victims for not coming forward.

I've reported a bunch of those posts to Facebook. Not sure it will do any good, but they were too disgusting to do nothing about.

We should all do the same. Facebook standards are suspect but if you get large numbers of people reporting, they might be more likely to do something.

 

[okokok777]

Also not that I’m trying to speak for Bridget but from a victim’s perspective I would read the comment “nobody innocent hangs themselves” as “if he had not sexually assaulted anyone, he wouldn’t have hung himself because there would be no allegations”. Like...if you didn’t do it, no one would be talking about it. I am sure his suicide was very traumatic for her and most likely she has to reassure herself she didn’t do anything wrong, and if that’s what she has to think and say to cope with this, then ok.

It takes a lot of courage for someone to speak out, especially knowing that the accused was popular and has committed suicide. I give Bridget a tremendous amount of credit for coming forward.

But she is very wrong about "nobody innocent hangs himself" part. Wrong message to put out.

I know for a fact that Bridget has dealt with a lot of backlash after coming forward from within the skating community (we have a few mutual friends from UD). Several of the "Justice for John Coughlin" members were also her mentors and family friends.

While I don't agree with the comment of "suicide=guilt", we have to understand that people that are (or were) close to her have endlessly defended her abuser for months. She's been blamed for his death time and time again. She has been gaslit, verbally harassed and cyberbullied.

 

[JamieElena]

Nobody means not a single person. It's one thing to say that there is an interpretation that makes the most sense given the situation and the context. It's completely another thing to attack the intelligence and analytical capacities of others for reading what is said plainly.

Even the subtext that you are reading is, at the end of the day, an assumption. So, while everyone else here is taking this in and speaking from a personal place, maybe you shouldn't be going around being unnecessarily (and ignorantly) insulting.

Except that she didn't use the word "nobody" - the poster here misquoted her. It's very clear she is speaking about John specifically.

Further, if all anyone can focus in on is one statement - that's been misquoted & misconstrued repeatedly - they're missing the bigger picture and quite frankly, are part of the problem.

edited bc I hadn't seen all her posts.

 

[tony]

Except that she didn't use the word "nobody" - the poster here misquoted her. It's very clear she is speaking about John specifically.

She did, the first time she replied.

 

[JamieElena]

She did, the first time she replied.

Ok, I see there's another post further down....I got caught up in reporting all the flamer posts & didn't scroll down. It's still clear who she's referring to & I still say that if that's all someone can focus on, they're missing (& avoiding) the point.

 

[Minou]

“Nobody innocent hangs themself ”

This is BS! She can go to hell!

I found that disturbing too.
However, that negates neither the trauma she has suffered or the courage it took courage it took to make her story public.

 

[PRlady]

Here’s some research out today on what happens to women reporting sexual harassment, if you’re interested.

http://theconversation.com/women-ta...assment-but-metoo-may-be-changing-that-116794

 

[all_empty]

Here's the article by Yahoo (which essentially plagiarized Brennan) and there are already 1,200+ comments there.

https://sports.yahoo.com/united-sta...ged-sexual-abuse-john-coughlin-005740713.html

To post her story on her FB account shows a lot of courage but also opens Bridget up to a lot of scary people.

Just as a reference for anyone, you can turn off comments on Facebook even before posting.

https://m.facebook.com/help/1766818986917552

Of course, there are the vile people who will go after alleged victims on other platforms, but this affords some protection for someone who come forward publicly like this.

I'm very interested to see how, or even if, USFS responds.

 

[puglover]

Sometimes it seems to me that the more understanding and progress we make - the more comfortable it is to fall back on old thinking and habits. Victims of rape often were subjected to having their entire sexual history presented in open court. Most of us, for good reason, know very little about the sexual proclivities of our friends and coworkers. Probably a coach can speak volumes about their love and respect for an athlete - but what do they know about that athlete's sexual preferences? It seems those who originally came forward did so appropriately to SafeSport and it was quietly investigated. SafeSport's subsequent actions towards John indicate that they, at least, had concerns about his conduct. One thing that takes these allegations from a "he said - she said" is numbers of "she said" and especially if there are no signs of collusion between the accusers. John's actions put an end to further investigation of the allegations. Of course, innocent people can take their own life, but questions will remain that only they could have answered.

 

[Jimena]

I knew John, like I said. Not well. Nice guy, always fun to be around, which is what made this whole situation so shocking to me and lots of people I know who knew him well. But anyone can do stuff like this and you'd never know. She has no reason to lie, and even though I liked John as a person from what I saw of him, I remember thinking the whole thing with Caydee was very, very strange and inappropriate. But you justify these things when you see only one side of a person.

I haven't followed US pairs for a while so I'm in the dark about "the whole thing with Caydee". What happened between them?

 

[coppertop1]

Here's the post by Yahoo (which essentially plagiarized Brennan) and there are already 1,200+ comments there.

https://sports.yahoo.com/united-sta...ged-sexual-abuse-john-coughlin-005740713.html

To post her story on her FB account shows a lot of courage but also opens herself up to a lot of scary people.

Just as a reference for anyone, you can turn off comments on Facebook even before posting.

https://m.facebook.com/help/1766818986917552

Of course, there are the vile people who will go after alleged victims on other platforms, but this affords some protection for someone who come forward publicly like this.

I'm very interested to see how, or even if, USFS responds.

If the USFSA doesn't respond, they're definitely complicit. There's so much concern about the young teen girls in Russia being abused but it all comes out hollow if people aren't willing to fix things in their own backyard.

It makes me wonder how long this type of thing has gone on for. It troubling that when SafeSport said that abuse has gone on for a while the response was to get angry at SafeSport.

 

[coppertop1]

It looks like the Remember John Coughlin group is gone from Facebook. They changed it to Secret after Bridget spoke up.

 

[AngieNikodinovLove (ANL)]

Ive tried not to chime in on the whole Coughlin thing,..but now that an actual survivor has come forward I will.

In my personal beliefs I always knew that most times where there is smoke there is fire, and even rumors have at the very least a drop of truth to them.

One thing that sticks out in my mind still that has made me angry is when Dalilah at Nationals tried to have a lot of her skaters where John Coughlin hats or what not. (I was like... Dalilah... just because you knew him one way doesnt mean that was the same way others knew him).

It's like my Republican friend trying to ask me to wear a MAGA hat. Now in my 40s I could firmly say "Beat It" but Im not sure as a 19 or 18 yr old I would have the confidence to tell my coach or someone I am to respect to get lost.

I hope that victims are able to find peace and to move forward in this tragedy.

Heart breaks.

 

[AngieNikodinovLove (ANL)]

The people who don't believe the accusers or even Dr. Blasey Ford get me so very agitated.

If you are the victim of something (especially sexual abuse) MOST people dont have the confidence or courage to report... sometimes they cant report or talk about it their entire life....

Fear is very debilitating!! Fear prevents all of us from taking action on so many things. Because of fear I did not move to Europe to make a life with someone.. Because of fear I missed out on work opportunities and because of fear victims are afraid to fight and report.

I understand it and get it. I wish others could at least listen.

Ugggg.

 

[Badams]

I think it says a lot about us that we are condemning her for not speaking up correctly. She made a comment, probably in the heat of the moment, and that's what so many people seem to be focusing on. She was probably nervous/angry/fed up/scared as hell/emotional. She probably didn't think of running it by a publicist. I'm sure that she wasn't meaning to condemn every human who has ever committed suicide as guilty criminals.

The comments on her Facebook page are disgusting. And odd. Are they even from real humans?

 

[5Ali3]

Thank you to everyone who is speaking up in support of survivors. Many people in the skating community read FSU and your support is noticed and makes a difference.

One thing that sticks out in my mind still that has made me angry is when Dalilah at Nationals tried to have a lot of her skaters where John Coughlin hats or what not.

Some of those skaters felt very strongly that they did not want to wear those damn hats, but Delilah didn't give them a choice. She litterally put hats on the heads of on athletes who didn't want them. If you watch Tarah Kayne, she tried hard to avoid putting that hat on - when she clutched it to her chest, she covered it completely with both hands, deliberately. The fact that athletes in their 20s didn't feel like they could stand up to their coach in the middle of Nationals is a major indictment of figure skating culture, without question.

(I was like... Dalilah... just because you knew him one way doesnt mean that was the same way others knew him).

This is the main thing that I don't understand that people don't understand. Just because all of your interactions with someone were positive doesn't mean that someone else's interactions with that person weren't negative!

 

[okokok777]

Former skating partner says KC’s John Coughlin sexually abused her when she was a teen

https://amp.kansascity.com/news/local/article230646344.html

This article from the Kansas City Star provides a bit more information, including statements from Bridget, John's sister Angela and SafeSport representative Dan Hill.

 

[Perky Shae Lynn]

Anyone questioning whether Bridget is telling the truth, why speak up now, etc. Folks, she has NOTHING to gain (except some inner peace) from this revelation. This is not the fame anyone ever wants. She's putting herself in a serious line of fire. Think about that, before saying "she's got no proof"....

 

[blue_idealist]

I haven't followed US pairs for a while so I'm in the dark about "the whole thing with Caydee". What happened between them?

I thought this just referred to him dumping Caitlin Yankowskas to skate with (and date the much-younger) Caydee, but maybe there's something else I don't know about, either. This confession from Bridget makes me wonder if something bad went on behind the scenes with him and Caitlin, since their breakup was surprising.

 

[coppertop1]

I think it says a lot about us that we are condemning her for not speaking up correctly. She made a comment, probably in the heat of the moment, and that's what so many people seem to be focusing on. She was probably nervous/angry/fed up/scared as hell/emotional. She probably didn't think of running it by a publicist. I'm sure that she wasn't meaning to condemn every human who has ever committed suicide as guilty criminals.

The comments on her Facebook page are disgusting. And odd. Are they even from real humans?

Exactly my thoughts. She's going through all this and she gets criticized for not being objective or perfect?

Former skating partner says KC’s John Coughlin sexually abused her when she was a teen

https://amp.kansascity.com/news/local/article230646344.html

This article from the Kansas City Star provides a bit more information, including statements from Bridget, John's sister Angela and SafeSport representative Dan Hill.

Thank you the article. It's a good read. SafeSport is damned if they do, damned if they don't.

 

[WillyElliot]

Anyone questioning whether Bridget is telling the truth, why speak up now, etc. Folks, she has NOTHING to gain (except some inner peace) from this revelation. This is not the fame anyone ever wants. She's putting herself in a serious line of fire. Think about that, before saying "she's got no proof"....

Well, if she's been in trauma therapy since January, I'm not seeing the case for her to be making this up. And I agree that she has really nothing to gain by doing all this. It's not like she's suing Tom Collins or someone who could pay her off. Hopefully the other 9+ accusers will also come forward and share their stories.

Also, I think her statement that nobody who is innocent would kill himself wasn't meant as a gospel fact. It's her opinion. But people, some of whom have admitted being suicidal at times in their life, are twisting her statement as *Everyone* who would kill him/herself is guilty of something. And that to me was clearly not her intent. Suicide is strange. Some of the seemingly happiest people kill themselves. Bad break-up, financial problems, or just organic mental illness, who knows. So she didn't perfectly articulate her statement, so what? I am bothered by Tara Modlin's response. That name sounds so familiar, and it was linked to something unprofessional or unsavory IIRC. Was she Baiul's agent? Oh, wait, Johnny Weir's agent? I just remember something unpleasant regarding her.

 

[Perky Shae Lynn]

I think it says a lot about us that we are condemning her for not speaking up correctly. She made a comment, probably in the heat of the moment, and that's what so many people seem to be focusing on. She was probably nervous/angry/fed up/scared as hell/emotional. She probably didn't think of running it by a publicist. I'm sure that she wasn't meaning to condemn every human who has ever committed suicide as guilty criminals.

I disagree. She is not being condemned for making a comment. It's being pointed out that the comment is insensitive at best. The only way to break the cycle is to be respectful to other people's feelings. All around.

 

[attyfan]

Pointing out that innocent people do kill themselves in response to accusations should not be taken as condemning this speaker. There is (or at least ought to be) a huge difference between pointing out a factual error about innocence and suicide and the wrongful attacks that discourage victims.

 

[UGG]

I disagree. She is not being condemned for making a comment. It's being pointed out that the comment is insensitive at best. The only way to break the cycle is to be respectful to other people's feelings. All around.

If I had just revealed a controversial sexual assault allegation (due to the abuser being a beloved member of the community) and the well like, respected abuser killed himself therefore sending myself trauma therapy and people were being critical of a statement made on my Facebook that very apparently was referencing my abuser and not every single person who has taken their own life, I would tell those critics to F off..

I do not believe it is illogical for someone in her situation to think “If he was innocent, he would not have killed him self because there would never be allegations”

 

[tony]

More that still bothers me:

John having said he's not allowed to comment on the situation and that they weren't telling him anything (ie. he knows nothing about where it came from) - we've known for a while now that is not true and that he had certain rights.
The insistence that this all started over someone being jealous of him and trying to keep him from getting a commentating job (someone remind me who specifically started that- was it his sister?) - are we now to believe that the at least four and maybe as many as ten people all colluded together because they all wanted said position or were to benefit because of that?
And it still remains-- if it was indeed because of a commenting position, why Modlin and Maurizi wanted to get in touch with certain individuals involved in the situation following his death.

 

[Perky Shae Lynn]

Pointing out that innocent people do kill themselves in response to accusations should not be taken as condemning this speaker. There is (or at least ought to be) a huge difference between pointing out a factual error about innocence and suicide and the wrongful attacks that discourage victims.

That would be your right. Doesn't make me a monster to dislike the comment. Unfortunately, innocent people do hang themselves. As a person whose best friend attempted suicide after a false child abuse allegation and public humiliation (yes, she was 100% cleared), I reserve the right to wish that people would be kind. Even if they have experienced horrible unkindness and hurt. Maybe because they have experience those things.

 

[attyfan]

....

I do not believe it is illogical for someone in her situation to think “If he was innocent, he would not have killed him self because there would never be allegations”

That it is understandable that someone might think a certain way does not elevate that belief into evidence. For example, I recall reading someone say that an accused person must be guilty because the families thought he was and they had no motive to lie. This may be logical, but the opinions of the family are not evidence ... and they did not become evidence because there was other evidence showing that the accused was guilty.

Similarly, John Coughlin's suicide is not evidence of guilt -- and neither the logic of the victim's belief nor the other evidence (that Tony Wheeler pointed out) -- changes that.

Furthermore, from what I have been reading (have not personally checked the Facebook posts), the real attacks on the victim are not connected to the evidentiary value of a suicide.

 

[attyfan]

That would be your right. Doesn't make me a monster to dislike the comment. Unfortunately, innocent people do hang themselves. As a person whose best friend attempted suicide after a false child abuse allegation and public humiliation (yes, she was 100% cleared), I reserve the right to wish that people would be kind. Even if they have experienced horrible unkindness and hurt. Maybe because they have experience those things.

I meant to agree with you, and I apologize for anything I said that you thought made you look like a monster. Innocent people do kill themselves (that is why I said the victim made a factual error in saying that they don't) and I don't consider pointing out the victim's factual error to be an attack on her.

 

[Tinami Amori]

If you can even call them "people"- they are like bots, maybe all one person, without pictures of themselves, and instead notice they all have pictures of Trump on their profiles. Maybe terrorists of some sort.

Yea I did notice they are all trump supporters with like 1 friend.

It’s possible they’re not skating fans and know nothing about Coughlin. There’s a band of men’s rights activists on social media, big Trumpies and virulently anti-#MeToo, who go after harassment and assault victims ideologically. They’re the lowest of the low.

Clearly this is a "false flag" operation, commonly practiced on FB and other social media by Radical mad Lefties. They register as obvious "pro Trump" and "far right", make extreme statements to cause provocations and to stir up anger on sensitive issues. It is a well known tactic of the Radical Left.

Now in my 40s I could firmly say "Beat It" but Im not sure as a 19 or 18 yr old I would have the confidence to tell my coach or someone I am to respect to get lost.

That's your choice and/or your personality. Back in the 70's, in schools in USSR, few students age 12-13 stood up to teachers whom they highly respected and admired, against various "communist issues" they did not agree with, risking serious consequences for the rest of their lives. It took until 90's for the rest of the country to realize that they were right. sometimes it takes time..

If one does not have "the confidence" to stand up for oneself or what one believes in, one needs to change him/herself, and develop that "confidence" and not blame others for "not giving/allowing that confidence". Normal human instinct is "if someone grabs you or forces you, and you don't like it, punch/escape/avoid that person, and report to the authorities".

Former skating partner says KC’s John Coughlin sexually abused her when she was a teen
https://amp.kansascity.com/news/local/article230646344.html

I am glad the lady spoke out. Finally people are learning details, and at least now we know that it was reasonable to suspect JC of at least a "statutory rape".

The "abuse" term is still an issue for me. I would like to hear more specifics; did he "force her physically", or just actively and persuasively "seduced her" into relationship?. To me there is a difference, especially since their partnership lasted 2 years.. and because of this mention in the Kansas City article, i too find it interesting....

Coughlin had been living with Namiotka and her family at their Pennsylvania home during at least part of the time they trained and competed together, his family told The Star earlier this year.