The Heir, The Spare and the “Baby Brain” -The Prince Harry and Meghan show rumbles on…

[Andora]

I didn't realise you saw yourself that way.

I don't, and I think that's clear. But then I thought you were better than such half-assed attempted snarkery. I'll be sure to avoid that mistake in the future.

 

[starrynight]

For sure, Harry has been courting anti- monarchist and anti-British circles to boost his profile and probably dig at his family.

Initially probably a pretty easy target in the USA, because of course people there are anti-monarchy cause they are a republic and fought a war against Britain to be so. And it’s also pretty low stakes, because the opinions of Americans on this don’t actually have any consequences. For Harry or Americans (nothing can actually effect Harry’s royals status and on the other hand, no one is expecting US taxpayers to pay for Harry etc).

But these efforts will probably be for short term gains. Harry, who has his Royal monogram stamped all over his soft furnishings, will never satisfy the expectations of this audience.

Real abolitionist/republican circles in the UK and the commonwealth (the ones that actually matter) have seen through all of this long ago. Doubt they’ll be buying Harry and Meghans homewares and makeup lines or whatever they release next. Given Harry’s inability to withstand scrutiny or criticism, these people would probably scare the pants off of him. They won’t be nodding sympathetically while Harry complains the British taxpayer won’t pay his security bill.

 

[Husky]

It's really gross that Andrew has such a devoted online following.

I don't even like this man, but the label "pedophile" is just wrong. You don't help victims by adding to the original crime incorrect legal terms. Having sex with a 17 year old doesn't make you a pedophile. You can still be guilty of rape, abuse, exploitation, or trafficking this person.

 

[Sparks]

The correct term is Ephebophilia

Ephebophilia - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

 

[canbelto]

I don't even like this man, but the label "pedophile" is just wrong. You don't help victims by adding to the original crime incorrect legal terms. Having sex with a 17 year old doesn't make you a pedophile. You can still be guilty of rape, abuse, exploitation, or trafficking this person.

I;m not talking about you. Talking about twitter. He has ... uh, a huge fanbase.

 

[canbelto]

As I'm reading this I think it's too bad it didn't work out with Chelsy Davis. She seemed to have a good head on her shoulders.

 

[Karen-W]

As I'm reading this I think it's too bad it didn't work out with Chelsy Davis. She seemed to have a good head on her shoulders.

Same with Cressida Bonas, to be honest. But, also, both of them had the sense to walk away from the hot mess that Harry clearly always has been.

 

[Allskate]

As I'm reading this I think it's too bad it didn't work out with Chelsy Davis. She seemed to have a good head on her shoulders.

I don't see how that would have helped much. She hated the tabloids, too, and she might have preferred to live in Africa away from the tabloids and nuttiness. The tabloids would have gotten worse with her once they were engaged. The tabloids obviously wouldn't have been racist, but they still would have stalked her and made up stories about her, which would have infuriated and scared him. He also would have been worried for their children. A lot of people seem eager to blame Meghan for Harry getting so upset with the tabloids and wanting to leave. However, I think it's pretty clear that he always has detested the tabloids, even before his mother's death. And her death makes him even more scared and angry. I doubt his father would have been any more helpful or empathetic if it were Chelsy that Harry was worried and angry about and trying to protect.

Harry never was going to get what he wanted - respect from everyone and a truthful and respectful press that did not constantly hound him. And he always was going to suffer from anxiety and be part of a dysfunctional family and grow up without his mother and do some pretty foolish things. The Nazi costume and Las Vegas incidents and drugs happened before he met Meghan.

In some ways, the military was good for Harry, but I do wonder if it made some things worse for him. Harry talks in the book about PTSD and makes it seem like it was due to Diana's death, but it would not be surprising if it was from his military service, too. He saw some awful things. He lives with the frustration of not having been able to do more. Making sure that civilians were not killed and injured, but worrying that Taliban were getting away and would kill more British troops. Worrying that killing Taliban would create more Taliban but not killing them would lead to more British and allied deaths. Not being able to do more to help the Ghurkas. Not knowing what to do with himself and finding a purpose after leaving the military. My great-uncle was a navigator on American bombers during World War II. He later became a very successful business man, but I've been told that he also suffered from PTSD and he was very untrusting.

 

[MacMadame]

In what way would Harry and Meghan doing their own thing have accomplished this?

Being half in and half out is not something that is done now. It would have been a new way of being a royal.

It directly impacted them, because they would have more workload with two people less covering the existent comitments to charities and so on. I mean, Catherine is now royal patron for rugby. Harry was a much better fit.

That's really tenuous. It's still indirect because there was no guarantee that their workload would have increased anyway or that other royals who did less might not pick up the slack or that some of those patronages and other duties might not have been dropped.

I think of it this way: if an employee is thinking of quitting and is negotiating with their boss about it, why would all the other employees in the department be involved in that negotiation? Sure, if someone leaves, it impacts the work of everyone else. But that doesn't mean we get a say in whether to offer a raise to keep them or what the effective date of the resignation is or other details.

You are aware Harry doesn't agree with this right?

Why would I care what he thinks? He's part of the useless and irrelevant institution I want to get rid of.

 

[marbri]

Why would I care what he thinks? He's part of the useless and irrelevant institution I want to get rid of.

Didn't you guys get rid of them in 1776?

 

[Rainbow]

Being half in and half out is not something that is done now. It would have been a new way of being a royal.


That's really tenuous. It's still indirect because there was no guarantee that their workload would have increased anyway or that other royals who did less might not pick up the slack or that some of those patronages and other duties might not have been dropped.

I think of it this way: if an employee is thinking of quitting and is negotiating with their boss about it, why would all the other employees in the department be involved in that negotiation? Sure, if someone leaves, it impacts the work of everyone else. But that doesn't mean we get a say in whether to offer a raise to keep them or what the effective date of the resignation is or other details.

The ones, who have to agree to take on the additional workload and/or reorganise everything usually are involved in our organisation. Not in the negotiation of course, and I might add in public service there is not a lot to negotiate anyway, but in the discussion of how to handle the situation, e.g. due to a longer maternal leave. If the person, who is supposed to cover for the maternal/paternal leave taker says no, the organisation has to find another solution, for example.

 

[Andora]

As I'm reading this I think it's too bad it didn't work out with Chelsy Davis. She seemed to have a good head on her shoulders.

Same with Cressida Bonas, to be honest. But, also, both of them had the sense to walk away from the hot mess that Harry clearly always has been.

Way to miss the point, both of you. Yeah, clearly Meghan was the problem. She's definitely the one who wrote Harry's book and included all the details you gleefully bitch about.

And also, consider how obnoxious it can sound. "If only Harry had stayed with one of those nice, white girls born into rich families, who are more in line with Harry's family's ethics and values."

@Karen-W mentioning Cressida is especially hilarious considering she's... AN ACTRESS. Oh, sorry, Wikipedia also notes she's considered an "it girl," which would definitely put her in better position to be Harry's wife. Hell, Meghan seems to have accomplished more than Ms. Bonas, on screen AND off, so I'm confused as to why she would have been a better choice other than her race, ties to aristocracy, and being British. (No disrespect to Cressida herself who is lovely, I'm sure)

Neither girl was treated well by the press when they dated Harry-- I remember how mean they were about Ms. Davy, who was often made fun of for not being so refined. Neither woman wanted any part of royal life, and good for them. Because there's women who will switch schools and work unserious jobs post graduation so they can be ready to say yes to a royal proposal, the way Princess Kate did.

 

[canbelto]

Way to miss the point, both of you. Yeah, clearly Meghan was the problem. She's definitely the one who wrote Harry's book and included all the details you gleefully bitch about.

And also, consider how obnoxious it can sound. "If only Harry had stayed with one of those nice, white girls born into rich families, who are more in line with Harry's family's ethics and values."

I didn't mean that at all, but okay. I also don't think Meghan's race is the reason Harry is so unhappy. I think the vile racist attacks in the press contributed to the stress, but I also think Harry and Meghan bring out aspects of each other's personality that isn't very healthy.

 

[Andora]

I didn't mean that at all, but okay. I also don't think Meghan's race is the reason Harry is so unhappy. I think the vile racist attacks in the press contributed to the stress, but I also think Harry and Meghan bring out aspects of each other's personality that isn't very healthy.

If only FSU had an "eye roll" option under the "Likes."

 

[Karen-W]

Way to miss the point, both of you. Yeah, clearly Meghan was the problem. She's definitely the one who wrote Harry's book and included all the details you gleefully bitch about.

And also, consider how obnoxious it can sound. "If only Harry had stayed with one of those nice, white girls born into rich families, who are more in line with Harry's family's ethics and values."

Or, you know, two young women who were far more familiar with British culture than Meghan, seeing that Chelsy attended boarding school and university in the UK and Cressida was born and raised there.

Like it or not, Meghan's lack of familiarity with British culture WAS a problem, in the long run, with her ability to adapt and fit into the role expected of a senior royal. And, honestly, even as Megxit was happening, I didn't fully assign all blame on her for that failure. I felt, and Harry's memoir only confirmed it, that he was as much to blame as she for what ultimately happened.

As it is, they're both parasites of a sort.

 

[canbelto]

If only FSU had an "eye roll" option under the "Likes."

Um, I'm literally the most woke person on the board. I'm the one who says William and Kate are afraid of black people after their trip to the Caribbean. But now I'm racist?

 

[Lemonade20]

I agree, together they bring out the worst in each other.

 

[Karen-W]

Um, I'm literally the most woke person on the board. I'm the one who says William and Kate are afraid of black people after their trip to the Caribbean. But now I'm racist?

Truth! I'll back @canbelto up on this. She and I rarely agree on much and she's been one of Meghan's biggest supporters in the past. There's nothing racist in any of her criticism of Harry and Meghan nowadays.

 

[canbelto]

Ok one thing where Harry loses me is his resentment that he was pulled from the Iraq duty because of security concerns. He really, really doesn't get that being pulled from deployment over security concerns in the army is actually the ultimate privilege. There are a bunch of young army members sent overseas on dangerous deployments and many of them don't come home, but they also don't get to drop out because of security concerns.

I don;t think Harry gets that this was actually the "Firm" throwing their weight around for him.

 

[once_upon]

One thing I've learned in my almost 70 years on this earth, my opinion on who would have been a better mate for someone, rarely if ever knows anything about the relationship of the two people who ARE in the relationship.

It's all fine and good you all think Chelesa or Cressida would have been a much better choice, but for some reason they didn't. And who knows, maybe William and Charles and Elizabeth didn't think so and pushed Harry out of those relationships.

 

[Andora]

Or, you know, two young women who were far more familiar with British culture than Meghan, seeing that Chelsy attended boarding school and university in the UK and Cressida was born and raised there.

Like it or not, Meghan's lack of familiarity with British culture WAS a problem, in the long run, with her ability to adapt and fit into the role expected of a senior royal. And, honestly, even as Megxit was happening, I didn't fully assign all blame on her for that failure. I felt, and Harry's memoir only confirmed it, that he was as much to blame as she for what ultimately happened.

As it is, they're both parasites of a sort.

Meghan's familiarity with, and ability to bend to British Royal expectations, was a problem, not her familiarity with British culture. Conflating the two is completely stupid.

And her "inability" to fit into a role within the BRF was probably a draw for Harry by the time they were in Vancouver. But I'd argue she was completely human and thank god she didn't bow down and be a good (and boring) "senior royal." That whole machination is the problem, and continuing to uphold it as if it's a good thing is madness.

And the two women who were familiar with the BRF and its requirements? Knew better than to get involved in that mess. I'd argue they had much more in common WITH Meghan, in fact, than they'd be a "more suitable" choice for Harry according to people who want him to shut the hell up and keep propping up his father & brother.

Um, I'm literally the most woke person on the board. I'm the one who says William and Kate are afraid of black people after their trip to the Caribbean. But now I'm racist?

But I didn't say you or Karen were racist. I was specific in how I chose my words. I said consider how it sounds. No one called you racist. But don't let me keep you from luxuriating in your victimhood.

(And that you're the most woke person on the board)

 

[overedge]

I don't even like this man, but the label "pedophile" is just wrong. You don't help victims by adding to the original crime incorrect legal terms. Having sex with a 17 year old doesn't make you a pedophile. You can still be guilty of rape, abuse, exploitation, or trafficking this person.

And it doesn't help victims to be quibbling over technicalities as to when someone isn't or isn't a child. He was being pimped young women who were younger than his own daughters. That's disgusting enough on its own.

 

[puglover]

I have chosen not to buy the book by Harry on principle but I certainly have seen and heard many excerpts from it. In the super market the cover of Hello Magazine features a nice photo of Prince Harry with the caption " I love my family and always will". So hypocrite that I may be, I am curious to know if you get a sense of that in his selected memories. We know he loved his mother but are there wonderful details of Christmas at Sandringham or playing polo with his brother, or the happy threesome there seemed to be with his brother and sister-in-law, or even becoming an uncle? I have heard a lot about little bridesmaid dresses and choice of tiara but is there any joy in the wedding that seemed to celebrate Meghan's heritage, the acceptance of an adoring public, and his father, the future king, walking her part way down the aisle, a public statement that said "she is one of us".

 

[overedge]

I was at a bookstore last weekend and flipped through Spare. As much as I am interested in reading it....the book would be about half as long without all that dynamic paragraphing. Single-line paragraphs are great for dramatic effect when they're used occasionally, but it's overkill and not particularly enjoyable reading when they're used again and again and again.

 

[MacMadame]

The ones, who have to agree to take on the additional workload and/or reorganise everything usually are involved in our organisation. Not in the negotiation of course, and I might add in public service there is not a lot to negotiate anyway, but in the discussion of how to handle the situation, e.g. due to a longer maternal leave. If the person, who is supposed to cover for the maternal/paternal leave taker says no, the organisation has to find another solution, for example.

But that happens after the other person resigns; they get no input into the actual details of the resignation. Just like it did this time.

 

[MsZem]

Way to miss the point, both of you. Yeah, clearly Meghan was the problem. She's definitely the one who wrote Harry's book and included all the details you gleefully bitch about.

No, I think the problem is mostly Harry, who's got a lot of trauma that he hasn't processed in a healthy way. I do agree with those who wrote that Chelsy Davy and Cressida Bonas were more familiar with British (upper class) society and what it would mean to be with a member of the BRF, which is why neither wanted any part of it in the end.

AFAIK everyone ended up happily married, so I guess they made the right decision.

 

[skategal]

I have chosen not to buy the book by Harry on principle but I certainly have seen and heard many excerpts from it. In the super market the cover of Hello Magazine features a nice photo of Prince Harry with the caption " I love my family and always will". So hypocrite that I may be, I am curious to know if you get a sense of that in his selected memories. We know he loved his mother but are there wonderful details of Christmas at Sandringham or playing polo with his brother, or the happy threesome there seemed to be with his brother and sister-in-law, or even becoming an uncle? I have heard a lot about little bridesmaid dresses and choice of tiara but is there any joy in the wedding that seemed to celebrate Meghan's heritage, the acceptance of an adoring public, and his father, the future king, walking her part way down the aisle, a public statement that said "she is one of us".

I’m reading the book (almost half way through) and you can tell Harry really loves Charles and his grandparents as well as his mother.

Charles is coming off very well so far and they seem to have a pretty normal father-son relationship.

I’m finding the descriptions of Charles is the best part of the book. Sometimes hilarious but always heart warming.

Charles definitely marches to the beat of his own drum.

The relationship with William is more complex for sure.

Not much about Kate yet except that he really liked her when William and Kate got together.

 

[Tesla]

@puglover Why don't you get it from the library?

 

[taf2002]

As it is, they're both parasites of a sort.

They are supporting themselves. How does that make them a parasite?

I agree, together they bring out the worst in each other.

???

I just can't. The way you two make such sweeping statements that you have no way of knowing just boggles my mind.

 

[puglover]

@puglover Why don't you get it from the library?

If I had my wish, I would awake from a long winter's sleep and never hear about "Spare. I don't hate anyone, I have just so loved the royal family, especially the Queen. Whether she is openly criticized or not, she has been very much the matriarch of the family and this certainly attacks her legacy. She was never some doddering old dear there in name only but, although she wisely began involving her heirs in decisions, I doubt much got past her. As my mother would have said "and with her barely cold in her grave!!". I don't personally know anyone who has read the book and when I saw that head line it made me hope that perhaps the media was just ignoring some wonderful stories of the brothers growing up together.

This does touch home to me as I am the matriarch of a large family. I have 3 sons and their wives, 3 daughters and their husbands and 19 grandchildren. I can think of many moments I would like to take back and have a do over but I certainly hope none of them have the feelings that Prince Harry does. Of course, we aren't royals, but we dealt with sibling rivalry, etc. etc.