Lead roles that don't have romance/dating storylines in Non-Romance genres

[LeafOnTheWind]

So the topic of how to write romance in non-romance genres came up elsewhere and I've been thinking a lot about it since. My response was simply don't. Because when you stop to think about it, is there really any non-romance genre without some sort of sexual/romantic relationship?

I tend to watch non-romance exclusively with the occasional rom-com because most of the romance story lines make it sound like being single is the worst possible state of being. If I do watch a rom-com it tends to be movies like The Proposal with Ryan Reynolds and Sandra Bullock where they weren't actively looking to date. They just kind of happen to realize they love each other. The non-romance genres really don't have single characters but at least don't spend the majority of the story on the romance/dating aspects. If single characters exist, they tend to be supporting roles and are often the least human characters in the case of Sci-Fi and Fantasy.

I can't really think of any "datable" lead role that was just simply single and wasn't trying to hookup for a night, long-term relationship or thinking about starting a relationship. It would be nice to hear about an anti "When Harry met Sally" where the dating prospects are simply friends, coworkers, etc. If you can think of any "datable" single lead characters that are simply just being single and getting on with the story I would like to know.

I am excluding buddy type movies/books or other similar story lines because they aren't meant to date. I am specifically looking for roles that would normally be written as coupling up and refreshingly did not. I expect this to be a very, very short list if it exists at all.

 

[skategal]

I’m thinking “Murder She Wrote” but not sure if that counts as she was widowed as opposed to never married.

It’s also been a long time since I saw it so could be misremembering if there was a romance sub-plot somewhere.

 

[LeafOnTheWind]

I think there was an occasional flirtation for Murder She Wrote but it was mystery focused for the most part. That kind of brings up an interesting side thought though. Does Hollywood count Jessica Fletcher as datable because she was "too old"? I am having an equally hard time thinking of many roles in movies or books where the more mature actors get to still have sex. I think that has been changing slowly but still is an issue. It's the opposite of what I'm looking for here but if anyone wants they can start that thread.

ETA: Just clarifying that I am interested in any storytelling media that allows the leads to be single in a non-romance genre.

 

[MacMadame]

The non-romance genres really don't have single characters but at least don't spend the majority of the story on the romance/dating aspects.

I am confused. There are single characters all over non-romance novels.

 

[LeafOnTheWind]

I am confused. There are single characters all over non-romance novels.

Are they lead characters instead of sidekicks? List them. Are there specific types of non-romance genres that routinely skip romance side stories? List them.

100% of action movies that I can currently think of have a romantic interest subplot. Why is it there at all? I need a lead action hero that doesn't have one.

Book-based example is Dresden Files.

Spoiler

There is absolutely no reason at all to have him date Murphy. They had the Susan love interest to start before they killed her. I would be perfectly fine with all the story lines without any love interest at all. He could have adopted a kid for killing the red vampire line for that one to work.

 

[MsZem]

Are they lead characters instead of sidekicks? List them. Are there specific types of non-romance genres that routinely skip romance side stories? List them.

100% of action movies that I can currently think of have a romantic interest subplot. Why is it there at all? I need a lead action hero that doesn't have one.

The Terminator?

In the romance genre, the focus is by definition on a romantic relationship with an HEA or at least an HFN. In other genres, there is no requirement to have or not have a romantic component, so I don't see how we can make any broad statements about what happens routinely in those. But I will say that plenty of war/military movies don't focus on romantic subplots (e.g. Saving Private Ryan, Dunkirk, Black Hawk Down, Crimson Tide, A Few Good Men).

For characters to date or have romantic relationships seems to me just a reflection of human experience. It's what most people do at some point, even if not everyone ends up in a committed relationship.

 

[vgerdes]

The Terminator?

Well... Sarah Connor gets into a romantic relationship (that results in a child), even if the Terminator himself doesn't.

 

[MsZem]

Well... Sarah Connor gets into a romantic relationship (that results in a child), even if the Terminator himself doesn't.

I was referring to the character

Besides, that is not a lasting relationship, and it's not part of Terminator 2.

 

[LeafOnTheWind]

For characters to date or have romantic relationships seems to me just a reflection of human experience. It's what most people do at some point, even if not everyone ends up in a committed relationship.

It is also a reflection of human experience to not be in a relationship and not looking.

So far my list of single characters not in a relationship are Jessica Fletcher and the Terminator. One falls under Hollywood's misogyny because older women don't need sex and isn't "dateable" and the other isn't even human. That was kind of the point of my first post. Anyone have a dateable human example?

 

[skategal]

It is also a reflection of human experience to not be in a relationship and not looking.

So far my list of single characters not in a relationship are Jessica Fletcher and the Terminator. One falls under Hollywood's misogyny because older women don't need sex and isn't "dateable" and the other isn't even human. That was kind of the point of my first post. Anyone have a dateable human example?

I think at the time Hollywood probably considered Jessica Fletcher undateable. Now I think we see the older widows and widowers dating and in relationships (see Virgin River).

But possibly having Jessica Fletcher in a relationship would have majorly cut down on her time and ability to solve murders so it was shelved as an idea.

 

[quartz]

I’m reading the Shardlake series and the main character is a single, 40 something, lawyer. He does mention a couple of past infatuations, and in one book he has bit of a crush on a woman that goes nowhere. He is intelligent, well-mannered, resourceful, fairly well-off, but the women in his life seem to only want to be friends or need him in a professional capacity.
The series is, however, set in the time of King Henry the 8th, and there are many references to his “romances”, and we all know how that went…
Personally, I am not overly interested in romance in books or movies, (or in my real life either ) as it is generally quite tedious and boring, and I find any flirtatious/coquettish displays very unappealing.

 

[LeafOnTheWind]

I think at the time Hollywood probably considered Jessica Fletcher undateable. Now I think we see the older widows and widowers dating and in relationships (sew Virgin River).

Agree. I think that Golden Girls was one series that was incredibly ground breaking and had a lot to do with changing that stereotype. It still tends to be a more frequent type of storyline for the older woman. There were so many female detectives sleuthing around. As much as that is a gain for older women to still be seen as sexy it also eliminates one of the more abundant sources of material for anyone avoiding relationship garbage in a movie, tv series or book.

 

[skategal]

Just thought of another one.

The Mandolorian hasn’t done a romance storyline yet IIRC.

You never know though….it’s possible they could.

 

[MsZem]

It is also a reflection of human experience to not be in a relationship and not looking.

So far my list of single characters not in a relationship are Jessica Fletcher and the Terminator. One falls under Hollywood's misogyny because older women don't need sex and isn't "dateable" and the other isn't even human. That was kind of the point of my first post. Anyone have a dateable human example?

Well, if you narrow it down to only main characters who are "dateable" but never date/have a relationship even outside of the events of the movie or book, that's pretty limiting.

Sandra Bullock's character in Gravity and Matt Damon's character in The Martian are all on their own and don't date anyone in those movies, but they probably did so in the past. Does that rule them out? Do the films I mentioned in my previous post not count because some of them have ensemble casts rather than a single main character with no romantic subplot?

I really don't see why fictional relationships need to be referred to as "garbage". It's fine not to like reading/watching them, but garbage? Really?

 

[LeafOnTheWind]

Well, if you narrow it down to main characters who are "dateable" but never date/have a relationship even outside of the events of the movie or book, that's pretty limiting.

That's why I started this list. It pretty sad how limiting it is and doesn't need to be.

Sandra Bullock's character in Gravity and Matt Damon's character in The Martian are all on their own and don't date anyone in those movies, but they probably did so in the past. Does that rule them out? Do the films I mentioned in my previous post not count because some of them have ensemble casts rather than a single main character with no romantic subplot?

They don't count because they were in space or on a hostile planet alone. There was no one to date. I'm sure if they had been trapped with someone they would have put in someone of the opposite sex and we would have had a sex scene at some point. It would count if they were trapped with someone in their field of play and sex didn't happen at all.

 

[manhn]

What about all of the procedurals? The personal lives of the characters are pretty secondary.

 

[MsZem]

That's why I started this list. It pretty sad how limiting it is and doesn't need to be.


They don't count because they were in space or on a hostile planet alone. There was no one to date. I'm sure if they had been trapped with someone they would have put in someone of the opposite sex and we would have had a sex scene at some point. It would count if they were trapped with someone in their field of play and sex didn't happen at all.

So in addition to the other limitations, the characters must have dateable options but no desire to have a romantic or sexual relationship with anyone, ever?

I'm all for ace and aromantic representation, but I think you're putting so many limits on your search that you'll have a hard time finding much that fits these criteria.

 

[VALuvsMKwan]

What about all of the procedurals? The personal lives of the characters are pretty secondary.

Clarice Starling in the film version of "The Silence of the Lambs"?

The Silence of the Lambs (film) - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

The less said about the sequel "Hannibal" with Julianne Moore (since Jodie Foster declined to appear as Clarice in it), the better.

 

[caseyedwards]

How about war genre in films like saving private Ryan ,the thin red line, the big red one etc

 

[LeafOnTheWind]

John Wick counts. I don't care about past or future relationships as long as they aren't interfering with the story now. I can't believe I forgot that one because it's my favorite action movie for that reason alone. He definitely not looking for a hook up. He's hanging out with Halle Berry in the 3rd one and just goes on a killing spree.

 

[skategal]

Elsa in Frozen

I know you could argue it’s a kids movie but she was an adult princess and no romance even discussed.

Rare for a Disney movie.

 

[AxelAnnie]

Judging Amy has a fabulous story line with Tyne Daley and Richard Crenna . I don't remember how old they were, but they were hot! Really hot!

Movie: The wedding dress: Tyne Daley (again) wonderful love/intimacy story line with The Wedding Dress with Jay Brazeau. These are two movies that portray seniors who are both romantic and sexually active.

 

[LeafOnTheWind]

Elsa in Frozen

I know you could argue it’s a kids movie but she was an adult princess and no romance even discussed.

Rare for a Disney movie.

Which goes to show you how young we start training women to think everything is about being in a relationship. We could use more of these.

 

[Yehudi]

Luke Skywalker in the movies( he- fortunately- never got far with Leia)

The Doctor in Doctor Who was imagined as asexual by Jonathan Nathan Turner (with Susan being birthed asexually).

 

[LeafOnTheWind]

They did the same with Jenny in the The Doctor's Daughter with David Tennant. She was birthed asexually and fully grown.

 

[Cachoo]

This is an intriguing subject. I watched a film about two cops (Jason Statham, Paddy Considine) tracking a serial killer in “Blitz” and romance was not in the cards for them at all. It is on Tubi.
One of my favorite contemporary Masterpiece series was “Summer’s Lease” based on the John Mortimer mystery. Molly Pargeter is the main character with three daughters, an obnoxious father and a husband who is seeing another woman. She rents a villa for the summer and stumbles into a mystery. She does reconcile with her husband but that is an afterthought. She is consumed by the mystery and the viewer is enchanted by Italy (at least I was.). But Molly is not datable so she doesn’t fit the parameters.

 

[genevieve]

I find that male lead characters are often allowed to have lives that don't center around a romantic relationship, because in general, men's lives and stories are considered interesting in and of themselves, while women don't usually get the same grace. See: The Bechdel Test.

Kinsey Milhone in the Sue Grafton series is a notable exception. I think there may be some books where there is some sort of romantic possibility, but IIRC never anything that sticks.

 

[A.H.Black]

I'm thinking of some Denzel Washington movies. Equalizer (original) Unstoppable (?)

Denzel seems to focus on roles where he is not a romantic lead. I like that.

 

[MacMadame]

Are they lead characters instead of sidekicks? List them. Are there specific types of non-romance genres that routinely skip romance side stories? List them.

I started to list them but there were so many.

The Stephanie Plum series
The Kinsey Milhone series

Star Trek has lots of single people in important roles in all their shows. Sometimes they have romantic entanglements but they are brief and there is no sense they are looking when they don't. Some don't ever have romance.

It's been a while since I read Asimov or Bradbury so I can't list books or names, but they definitely have single characters, some of whom end up in a romance but many that do not.

IME with reading non-romance fiction, mostly sci-fi and mysteries, single people who don't have romantic entanglements are the norm.

 

[ballettmaus]

Which goes to show you how young we start training women to think everything is about being in a relationship. We could use more of these.

Somewhat on the subject of Disney princesses, while the Evil Queen in Once Upon a Time did date, she ended up realizing that she did not need romance/a love interest to be happy but that her son and friends were enough.

I'm thinking of some Denzel Washington movies. Equalizer (original) Unstoppable (?)

Speaking of Denzel Washington, I don't think there was any romance in The Pelican Brief, was there? If memory serves, the main character and the professor who got killed in the car bomb were involved but that was it, I believe.

I think there are a number of other John Grisham main characters that are single and don't date.

I recently caught a few reruns of The Mentalist and I don't think there was much, if anything, in terms of dating for the two main characters until the end of season 6.