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What sport would you have your daughter do if she was equally good at all she tried?

Discussion in 'Off The Beaten Track' started by TheGirlCanSkate, Nov 30, 2012.

  1. Anita18

    Anita18 Well-Known Member

    Just because she skates doesn't mean she has to compete. Skating is still an expensive sport if you count private lessons and skates/blades and such. But competing makes it much more expensive with the choreography and costumes and fees. :lol:

    My fiance gets very very grumpy if he doesn't skateboard on a regular basis. So he just goes out to a local skatepark and practices his tricks for a few hours every day when the weather permits. When he was young he thought he was invincible and got himself pretty hurt a few times, but now he's older and knows his limits. No rail tricks, obviously. :p But the physical activity and camaraderie with his skateboarding friends relaxes him.

    "Sports" can just be really any activity, it doesn't have to be structured if you either don't have the funds for it or if that's not what makes her happy. :)
  2. mkats

    mkats Well-Known Member

    Ooh, I really wanted to be an ornithologist in 5th grade!! We had an assignment to find someone who did what it was that we wanted to do when we grew up and interview them, so I called up my local Wild Bird Center and found a local ornithologist. When I got to his house and found his garage filled with rows and rows of dressers, each filled with dead birds with their wings splayed out and eyes rolled back, that was the end of that :yikes:

    Of course fifteen years later I had no problems with cutting up a real human body in grad school anatomy...
    kwanfan1818 and (deleted member) like this.
  3. danceronice

    danceronice Corgi Wrangler

    Well, the kind of horses you need for the Big Eq are less lifelong friends than 'hope you can get your $100,000+ investment back', and the GP horses belong to owners who have the money to campaign them. At the top of Juniors, you're already learning sponsors, owners, and resale value.

    When it comes to safety issues, though, I'd rather have a kid galloping at the track (exercise riding) than in hunters. Gambling means the sport's regulated a lot better, while hunter shows have people more needle-happy than your average heroin addict. As far as accidents, any time you're around horses, riding or not, there's a chance you're about to die, so that's kind of a wash no matter what discipline you pick. Racing where you've got trouble is maintaining your weight if you want to ride (I wasn't even old enough to gallop before I knew I would never be able to make weights), and finding a trainer to work up under if you want to train. (And accepting it's a business first, which I like about it as you don't run into as many sentimental hangups as with ammy owners.) Anything involving a horse, if you make the kid work for it (rather than middling-level hunters where the goal isn't a career, just having fun) will teach them to respect the animal, and to just accept that some days it is not going your way, and you will never get a reason because...its a horse. Horses teach you humility.

    Team sports honestly never even crossed my radar. I doubt I'd put much support or emphasis behind a kid doing any sort of team sport type of thing unless they were SO incredibly talented they realistically could go pro or get a full ride.

    Oooh...fencing is a good one. My cousin was big into it, but (at least back then) she would have had to move to New York (IIRC) to train seriously, and she went to engineering school instead.
  4. Angelskates

    Angelskates Well-Known Member

    Right, but does she want to be an athlete? None of the things you listed require her to do an incredibly high level of a sport. If she wants to be a skating coach, depending on her age, she can possibly start that pretty early. If she doesn't want to be an athlete, let her do all the sports she wants within your budget. Consider only letting her compete up to a certain level, or within a certain region to keep the costs down. I think it's silly to spend a fortune on a sport just because it's liked - even if she's good at it, unless she wants to try and be an athlete. I'm unhappy if I don't have sport/exercise - it just means I do some every day, not at a high level, but it still is good for me.
  5. TheGirlCanSkate

    TheGirlCanSkate Well-Known Member

    HA! She has met ornithologists and she has seen a lot of stuffed/dead birds. It's human blood makes her panic.
  6. Aceon6

    Aceon6 Hit ball, find ball, hit it again.

    Agree 100%. There's a gal in our area who plays golf at a very high level, as well or better than some pros on the Symetra tour. She HAS to play, as it's a big part of her life. For grins, she's happy to take $100 out of the pocket of any guy who thinks she "can't be all that good." Shes a doctor.
    kwanfan1818 and (deleted member) like this.
  7. Wiery

    Wiery Well-Known Member

    Not sports, but I recommend ballet or tae kwon do; IMO, they're surprisingly similar because they both foster self-discipline, and both are strength and coordination-building activities that would complement any sport she decided to do.

    Also, the flexibility she would develop would help protect against sports-injuries she might develop (to a point; however, hyper-flexibilty can make her injury prone).
    Last edited: Dec 1, 2012
  8. wickedwitch

    wickedwitch Well-Known Member

    I'd steer her away from any sport where losing weight is frequently encouraged, so no skating, dance, or wrestling.
  9. Anita18

    Anita18 Well-Known Member

    Yeah I'm a little befuddled why everyone jumping on the "serious athlete" bandwagon so soon.

    I loved to skate when I was in high school. Didn't have money for private lessons (let alone anything for comps or shows) so I just took group lessons and skated on public sessions. Never tested, never competed, but it was something I wanted to do for myself. My parents never supported me. In fact, my mom even criticized me one year for "wasting so much time skating" when I had no accomplishments to tout for it. In retrospect, I could have said the same thing about piano, which she put me into, because I never tested or competed in that either. :lol: We were never a sports-oriented family, and I think my sister and I turned out fine.

    It was just something I could do for me. And I did write about why I loved to skate for my college essay so that worked out in the end. :p
  10. Anita18

    Anita18 Well-Known Member

    Or any sport where there are sparring competitions. My friend in tae kwon do made weight to spar. She learned it in college and was on the collegiate team, so it was mostly fun instead of competitive. (She has the wrong body type for seriously doing tae kwon do anyway - long legs and skinny frame are best!) But it still behooved her to make weight.
  11. mkats

    mkats Well-Known Member

    ...are you me? This sounds exactly like me, even down to the college essays. :lol:

    Yeah, my mom also decided that I would play piano at a young age. It turned out that I never liked it, never enjoyed it, and never really had any desire to progress in it, but it sort of became a "we bought you a big expensive piano so shut up and practice and be grateful" kind of thing. It didn't really end well, and I was never any good at it. I realize that a little kid is probably going to change their mind quite frequently about what they want to do, but there's something to be said for not forcing the kid to do something because it's your dream.

    And in high school, when I first learned to drive and started working, I started taking learn-to-skate lessons. Never got any encouragement from my mother (also frequently got the waste-of-time line), but I really did enjoy it. And sure, I was never spectacularly good at that either, but I did it because I genuinely wanted to do it, so it was a LOT of fun :)
  12. Anita18

    Anita18 Well-Known Member

    Aren't you in med school? You're certainly more ambitious than me! :lol:

    I was actually very good at the piano, but I didn't have any accomplishments for it on paper. I have no idea what "level" I am, even. Put me in front of one though, and I'll play Rachmaninoff and show you exactly what I can do. ;) And my mom played too, so there wasn't the "we bought this big expensive thing FOR YOU so you'd better use it!" I will say that I enjoyed it more when I got older and could apprecite the emotional nuances. I'm not sure if I could have come to that conclusion if there had been a lot of pressure to compete or test.

    My fear is that if a parent pushes the "serious athlete" thing on their kid too soon, there's going to be a lot of pressure to participate and keep at it even if you don't like it anymore. There's an implicit obligation - if you've spent so much money on it, you can't just back out. And there is a huge difference between "I want to quit because this trick is too hard and I'll never get it" and "I want to puke if I ever see the training site ever again."

    The solution then, is to make the kid prove that they want it badly. Then you can give them the good coach or horses or fees to compete nationally. Then you'd be supportive instead of pressuring.

    I find it doubtful that the daughter really loves ALL her sports equally. My sister loved mock trial and speech & debate "equally," but when push came to shove and she had to give one up (because she couldn't physically be in two places at once), it was mock trial. I mean, there has to be one that she'd fight to keep participating in, even it took a big chunk out of her day and several solo bus rides. Has she proven she wants a sport that much? The decision should be easy if she's overcome obstacles to keep pursuing a sport.
  13. Badams

    Badams Well-Known Member

    My daughter likes to run. She really enjoys just running. The solitude of it, the non-competitiveness of it, the time to think...she loves it. But it would kill her to be on a track team and have to compete. So I let her run. For the love of it. I wish I had that love.
  14. Dragonlady

    Dragonlady Sew Happy

    Our daughter started out with a range of activities - not just sports, really anything she wanted to try. When she was little, she played T-ball, did gymnastics, swimming lessons, choir, ballet, Brownies and figure skating, over a period of about 6 years.

    She LOVED to skate. Every year, as she moved up, she skated more. Since we had a house rule - only one activity per day. We tried going from skating to T-ball one year and that was a disaster, and she was too tired at the end of the day. So if she wanted to skate more days, she had to give up what she was doing on those days, but the choice of what to give up was hers. By the time she was 10, she was doing skating and ballet.

    But always, she the choices were hers to make, because it was her life.
  15. rjblue

    rjblue Having a great day!

    That was my oldest daughter. Skating was her love, and she skated to quite a high level.

    My younger daughter tried skating, swimming, and soccer, but curling was the only sport that she loved, and she curled to quite a high level, and plans to return to curling when she is finished university.

    My son just likes to play. He enjoys physical activity and playing with his friends, but has no desire to practice outside of team time, and will never be on a high-level team. It's a shame because he's 6'5" and not fully grown, and quite smart, so with a medium amount of practice he would be able to get an athletic scholarship to a small school. However, as long as my kids are/were active and involved, I never make them focus on something that isn't their own choice.
  16. Dragonlady

    Dragonlady Sew Happy

    I was a swimmer. I rode horses, played basketball, volleyball and badminton, but swimming was my favourite. I was a summer swimmer as there were no indoor pools in the town where I grew up. I was on the town swim team and every week we competed at meets with other small communities. I was at the pool from the time it opened in the morning, until swim team practice ended at 7:00 p.m. We went home for lunch and dinner and then back down to the pool.

    To this day, when I want to exercise, I go to the pool and swim.
    PeterG and (deleted member) like this.
  17. Cachoo

    Cachoo Well-Known Member

    I never understood why girls were given softballs when hardballs were smaller and fit their hands better. I think I would want my daughter to be a good pitcher with a hardball. Of course that is only if she had no natural interest in anything else...
  18. TheGirlCanSkate

    TheGirlCanSkate Well-Known Member

    It was "mostly" a hypothetical question.

    You can't make a child do any sport they don't want to do without negative effects.
  19. mkats

    mkats Well-Known Member

    FWIW, judging from your posts in MITF, you've always seemed like a very reasonable skating parent to me. :)
  20. TheGirlCanSkate

    TheGirlCanSkate Well-Known Member

    This injury has me really shaken up. It's not the end of the world - she will heal, but I can't help but wish she didn't love skating so much. Who knew it would bother the parent more than the kid? I wish she loved something less dangerous more. Yoga maybe. :D

    But thank you!