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Parents, Don't Dress Your Daughters Like Tramps

Discussion in 'Off The Beaten Track' started by overedge, May 2, 2011.

  1. overedge

    overedge Janny uber

  2. Aceon6

    Aceon6 Hit ball, find ball, hit it again.

    It's getting harder, even for sizes as small as 6. By the time you get into the pre-teen stuff (10-12), it's either too short, too tight, or too revealing. Fortunately, our family's only remaining pre-teen is a jock, so she's happy in jeans or sweats for school as are most of her friends.
  3. soxxy

    soxxy Guest

    What a good question, I'm waiting for the replies. I thought the problem was always, "All the other kids are wearing.....".
  4. CynicElle

    CynicElle Well-Known Member

    I'm not a mom but I've done some shopping for girls' clothing, and although I can still find outfits that don't make me cringe, I really was :eek: at some of the clothes out there for fairly young girls. I guess I'm getting old.
  5. barbk

    barbk Well-Known Member

    Lands' End. LL Bean. The clothes last forever, and they don't do trashy or suggestive.
  6. Prancer

    Prancer Cursed for all time Staff Member

    Where are these people shopping?

    I don't have a little girl any more, but even my teenager can find perfectly presentable, unslutty clothes in stores (and she is WAY more modest than even I would demand her to be). I go shopping with a friend who has a nine year old girl, and, while we roll our eyes over some of the things we see, we never have any problem finding her daughter clothes, either.
  7. BigB08822

    BigB08822 Well-Known Member

    I don't have a little girl but I see tons of appropriate clothing at places such as JC Penny, Macy's, Dillards, Old Navy, etc. I think all the slutty clothes are at specialty stores in the mall such as Forever 21, Wet Seal, etc.
  8. Cyn

    Cyn Well-Known Member

    And Abercrombie, and Aeropostale, and Hollister, and Express, and on and on.

    Clothing that is more modest and age-appropriate is out there, but it' is far outnumbered by the skimpier, skankier stuff that dominates -- when MiniCyn and I go shopping, it's an all-day ordeal that is punctuated repeatedly by my grumbling at the lack of selection/:eek: hemlines or revealing tops/cursing the Bratz Dolls under my breath. The excursion is never complete without the requisite 473 times I have to tell MiniCyn to put whatever she's picked out back on the rack as it's too short/too low cut/too mature/won't fit her body type.

    She's not horrible about it in that she's not trying to deliberate dress like a slut; she's trying to follow a lot of the fashion trends. We can usually find a happy middle ground that isn't sleazy but at the same time isn't resembling Quaker fashion :eek: .
  9. PRlady

    PRlady flipflack

    The clothes at Urban Outfitter are fun and trendy and offbeat without being sluttish. I wish they had UO around when I was young enough to wear most of their stuff. It's too old for pre-teens, though.
  10. Stormy

    Stormy Well-Known Member

    Express isn't even for children or teens, nor is it marketed towards them. Express has plenty of appropriate clothing, I shop there all the time for work clothes. Yes, they have items also for more club or going out wear, but again, it's age appropriate. There's no problem with Express carrying short skirts for adult women. Just because a store has trendy music blasting doesn't mean it's trying to corrupt youth.

    Believe it or not, Abercrombie, Hollister, etc DO have some clothing that are just fine for teenagers. There are plenty of regular non midriff baring t-shirts, sweatpants without ass logos, hoodies, sweaters and dresses. Yes, I know they have low rise jeans and teeny skirts as well. But the entire Abercrombie store isn't a slut shop and never has been. Yes, the marketing is quite racy, I don't deny that either. But it's up to the parent to say "No, you may not have this skirt that barely covers your hoo-ha, but you may have this t-shirt with the moose on the front".

    Even in Abercrombie kids....what's wrong with any of these? http://www.abercrombiekids.com/weba...12103&categoryId=12151&parentCategoryId=13113

    Or these? http://www.abercrombiekids.com/weba...12103&categoryId=13112&parentCategoryId=13113

    I think the point of the article is spot on....don't dress your daughters like tramps. It might be a pain finding it, but there is plenty of age appropriate clothing out there that will look good on them. And even if they insist on Abercrombie or Hollister, there are things that are ok in there for them. I guess it just bugs me when people in general vilify the store instead of having the parents take more accountability for what their kids wear. I know I am way past the target age but I go to both Abercrombie and Hollister all the time. I have shirts from both stores that have lasted me forever. The quality is actually pretty good. I'd rather pay $25 for a shirt I'll have for 5 years than $5 for an Old Navy tissue tee that'll last the summer.
  11. PDilemma

    PDilemma Well-Known Member

    Stormy--I'm willing to believe you about Abercrombie; I've seen decent stuff in there. But I have underwear that covers more than the shorts and skirts at Hollister. You can get quality t-shirts and such at American Eagle, Gap, Banana Republic, etc... and shorts and skirts that cover your entire ass.
  12. marbri

    marbri Hey, Kool-Aid!

    I'm surprised to read people find Hollister, Abercrombie and Aeropostale slutty. Maybe it's the way some kids are wearing them that you are seeing ( ie. wearing clothing too small for them ) but I see teens everyday in these brands and I wouldn't think any of them are trashy looking. :confused: Even Forever 21 and Wet Seal have enough modest clothing to choose from.
  13. PDilemma

    PDilemma Well-Known Member

    At a school awards night, we were all treated to a full on view of a girl's business, shall we say, in her new Hollister skirt she had previously bragged about wearing to the event. If the shorts have an inseam the same length as boy short style underwear, it is hard to wear them modestly. And showing butt cheeks is not modest.

    And I am not a prude at all...I just don't want to know what kind of wax job someone gets just because I happened to see her in shorts or a skirt that are either way too short or way too low rise. Cover the butt cheeks and the hip bones, at least, people.

    I agree about Forever 21, FTR.
  14. marbri

    marbri Hey, Kool-Aid!

    So whatever that particular girl was wearing sounds inappropriate. I don't know what's inappropriate about the vast majority of their clothes though as they are t-shirts, hoodies, plaid shirts, jeans and sweatpants and the jean shorts mine has don't show butt cheeks or wax jobs. I see no exposed hipbones or bellies or cleavage at all.

    The skirts on the other hand can be short, particularly depending on the body shape, most kids I know wear biking shorts under them.
  15. Aussie Willy

    Aussie Willy Hates both vegemite and peanut butter

    Very impressive article.

    It is not just kids. So many people these days wear stuff that just isn't suitable for them. They think they are looking fashionable but end up just looking skanky. And that is because the majority of stuff available is just cheap, not well made and doesn't suit a lot of body shapes.

    But these are probably the same parents who put those headbands on their babies heads, even if they haven't got hair (one of the more ridiculous baby fashion trends). And a while back there was a company that made high heels for babies too, even though the kids couldn't walk.
  16. susan6

    susan6 Well-Known Member

    Perhaps marbri lives in an area where the parents are a little more involved in clothing selection (or the teens are more modest). Fashion trends and associated peer pressure may vary from place to place. My brother in law is a school bus driver and in his area he says it's absolutely sluts on parade. Abercrombie and their ilk wouldn't be offering bras and thongs for pre-teens unless they were selling.
  17. rjblue

    rjblue Having a great day!

    If the majority of girls are showing their hipbones, then why is it slutty to be exposing your hipbones? Modesty is not the fashion right now. Skin and piercings, and short skirts are the fashion, and a girl has to go really extremely underdressed to look odd right now.

    I find the whole tramp/slutty thing rather offensive, because to me it is very close to the argument I used to hear in the '70's where they would defend a boy's actions because the girl was "asking for it" by the way she dressed.

    A modestly dressed woman from the 1950's was wearing much less clothing than a prostitute from the 1900's. Was she dressing in a slutty fashion?

    Also- young women have always pushed at the boundaries of what is acceptable, and it takes maturity (and guidance from their parents) to achieve the right balance. Some parents just let them go out and make a spectacle of themselves, and some make them look ridiculously prudish.
  18. ryanbfan

    ryanbfan Active Member

    I used to work for the Abercrombie company.

    Just sharing here, target markets for Abercrombie owned stores -
    Ruehl 925 - around age 23 and up
    Abercrombie and Fitch - 18 - 22 years old
    Hollister - 15/16ish years to 18
    Abercrombie - 10 - 14

    My brother used to work for Express. That is definitely a store who's target market is not a pre teen. More like a young, working adult.

    But I do agree, lots of girls, especially younger ones are dressing incredibly provocatively lately. It's gross.

    ETA: Oh and have you guys noticed the new trend lately? Push up bathing suit tops. I'm pretty sure Abercrombie (the kids one, the adult one is Abercrombie and Fitch) has them. Target has them also. There's a trend I'll never understand.
  19. RockTheTassel

    RockTheTassel Well-Known Member

    I think there's plenty of jeans, tops, and dresses available, even if there's a lot of ill-fitting, trashy stuff to sift through in order to find it. It's mostly just parents needing to help their daughters shop and not allow them to buy bad looking clothes just because they're the latest trend.

    The only thing I haven't been able to find in recent years is a good pair of jean shorts. Everything available is either granny style or about as tiny as a swimsuit bottom. The tiny shorts are not only too revealing, but they're usually unfortunate looking for anyone without toothpick legs. I have one pair of shorts I bought years ago, nice normal ones, that I've been hanging onto since I can't find anything else. My sister has tried to steal them from me several times. :lol:
  20. nubka

    nubka Well-Known Member

    Parents don't don't put headbands on baby girls because of hair. They do it because it's easier than trying to keep a bow or barrette in. I think a lot of them are really cute. :summer:
  21. rjblue

    rjblue Having a great day!

    It also somewhat lessens the question- "How old is he?" Although it is surprising how many people will even overlook bows and headbands and ask about your little boy.
  22. Stormy

    Stormy Well-Known Member

    Ruehl doesn't even exist anymore. Abercrombie closed the brand well over a year ago. I liked their stuff but it was hella overpriced.

    So.....what's the difference between a push up bra and a push up bathing suit top? Both accomplish the same thing. And no, Abercrombie Kids doesn't offer the push up top anymore. Abercrombies does, but most adult bathing suit manufacturers do.

    Also, Hollister skirts- http://www.hollisterco.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/category1_10251_10201_12595_-1_12552 Yeah, the denim ones are too short, defintiely. But...there's plenty of pretty, more modest alternatives.
  23. rjblue

    rjblue Having a great day!

  24. LuckyCharm

    LuckyCharm Well-Known Member

    I always thought that was the main reason those headbands existed, i.e. to distinguish little bald baby girls from little bald baby boys.

    I also often cringe when I walk past the girls' department at many stores, but I also know there's plenty of appropriate stuff available in those stores too. The questionable items do seem to be displayed more prominently though.
  25. IceAlisa

    IceAlisa discriminating and persnickety ballet aficionado

    This. I recently took my 8 year old niece shopping--she requested my presence because "Auntie IceAlisa has style" :D. We got her long tank tops, cardigans and jeggigns (denim leggings) for school. I did see some inappropriate clothing for her age group and was pleasantly surprised that my niece was very aware of critical of them. Her style of clothing is very relaxed, yet cute and age-appropriate.

    My other niece is 12 and wears lots of jeans, sneakers and tees and tanks. She is starting to use make up and it's a bit of a struggle for her mom to keep it very light. But no, the answer is--most clothes for girls that I've seen are age appropriate.
  26. ryanbfan

    ryanbfan Active Member

    Personally I think push up bathing suit tops are tasteless. Then again I'm modest.
  27. wickedwitch

    wickedwitch Well-Known Member

    Finding any appropriate non-athletic shorts has been my summer shopping goal for three straight years. Ann Taylor's Loft has a good selection, but they're also quite expensive.
  28. Andora

    Andora Skating season ends as baseball season begins

    Oh, it it wasn't left in the '70s. You still run into this boneheaded mentality these days.

    I think slut-shaming is irresponsible and unfair. That said, it's not a terrible thing to keep kids looking like kids while you still can.
  29. danceronice

    danceronice Corgi Wrangler

    Personally, I say if it's not for sale, don't advertise, but if you're an adult you can do what you want. (People are entitled to not take you seriously because of it, as how you dress is how you want to be viewed unless someone FORCED you into wearing what you are. Like wearing an old t-shirt and flip-flops to an office job.)

    If you're a kid (ie under the age of majority), no dressing like a tramp, either the sluty kind or the hobo kind. And it's not in fact, as mentioned, hard to find decent clothes that are practical.

    As for push-up bathing suits, I hate them, but then I only wear a bathing suit if I actually want to SWIM. If they're being worn just to walk around, whatever kind of support you think you need. (Better too much than too little for some people.)
  30. made_in_canada

    made_in_canada INTJ

    Depends on the size of your chest and the coverage of the suit ;) If you're rocking DD's and they're falling out of your top, well yes that's pretty tasteless. However, I wear bikinis with a little bit of extra help and it isn't trashy. I have barely any breasts and look like a stick though.

    I don't really see that many young girls dressing like tramps around here. Although I will say that it seems that those that do usually have a mother or some other female caregiver around that's dressed questionably.