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Names You Will NEVER Give Your Children

Discussion in 'Off The Beaten Track' started by Cachoo, Nov 1, 2012.

  1. Quintuple

    Quintuple papillon d'amour

    1.) Wasn't there an entire thread dedicated to the college guidance counselor named Marijuana Pepsie Sawyer?

    2.) Aquanetta, as mentioned above, is the name of the mother of the boy who's the best ecolocuter in the world.

    3.) Not made up: My cousin went to school with a brother and sister whose last name is Choice. The girl's first name? NEW UNIQUE. The boy's first name? THE RAW.

    4.) Friend went to high school with two brothers name Limonjello and Orangello.

    5.) Same friend has a friend who's a 911 dispatcher. Friend got a call one night: "MY DAUGHTER MISSING."

    "Ma'am, how long has she been missing?"

    "OVER 24 HOUR."

    "All right, could you spell her name for me?"


    "Uh huh."




    "Go ahead."


    "Got it."


    "Yup ..."


    " ... ... female?"

  2. RockTheTassel

    RockTheTassel Well-Known Member

    For my generation, it's Sarah, Katie, and Brittany. I've met dozens of girls with these names over the years. I actually went by one of these names as a kid but finally started going by a nickname because the former name was just so common.
  3. Japanfan

    Japanfan Well-Known Member

    I don't care for the names 'Apple' or 'Free'. I met an Apple tonight and she's Chinese. Chinese people often adopt cute or unusual names for their English name. But this girl, she was cute as an Apple and the name suited her. But you can't count on that when a child is newborn.
  4. taz'smum

    taz'smum Well-Known Member

    My mother who would be 86 if she were still alive, went to school with a Nora Bone!! Poor Nora was a little bit simple to boot!

    Other names can become unfortunate, such as Richard Head!

    Other real names from my past, Orson Cart and Sunshine Brightly!!
  5. snoopy

    snoopy Team St. Petersburg

    What makes a Hebrew name Hebrew? Is it tradition or sound?

    A Muslim told me that a Muslim name is sound based - putting together syllables of sound found in the Qu'ran.

    I was looking at Hebrew names for girls very recently and there didn't seem to be a lot of modern choices.
  6. Zemgirl

    Zemgirl Well-Known Member

    Nevaeh is such a stupid name - why would you want to spell heaven backwards? Are the Naveahs being expelled from heaven? Do people ever spell other things backwards as names?

    Hebrew names will usually have some meaning in Hebrew, and/or be Biblical. There are actually lots of lovely Hebrew names for both boys and girls, both modern and retro, but I'm not sure how they'd sound to non-Hebrew speakers. PM me if you want some ideas ;)
  7. Nomad

    Nomad Celebrity cheese-monger

    My paternal grandmother was christened "Berthe-Mathilde de Créqui" in Alsace-Lorraine in 1900. She emigrated to the US with her family in 1913 and never forgave the officials at Ellis Island for changing her name to "Bertha Matilda Creaky". She was still bitching about it eight decades later. :lol:
    SpiralGirl and (deleted member) like this.
  8. misskarne

    misskarne #AustraliaForTheTeamEvent


    I wish there had been more Karens around when I was at school. I always felt like I had such an old, odd, rare name. When I was a kid I hated it and wanted to change it. :lol: at being a kid. Now I love it.
  9. shan

    shan Well-Known Member

    :rofl: That is bizarre!

    That is unfortunate... (((Bertha Matilda Creaky))) :scream:
  10. Rae35

    Rae35 Active Member

    Have read most of this thread and been amazed at the names. When I was thinking of what not to name a child - Bertha, Maude and Mavis were my first thoughts, which now seem tame and acceptable given everything above. I can't think of any unacceptable boys names, (of the ordinary variety). Bruce is no longer fashionable. You don't hear that name very often. What other "regular" names have gone out of fashion over the past two generations?
  11. gkelly

    gkelly Well-Known Member

    There are plenty of names that are perfectly normal and acceptable for other people to name their kids but that I would never use because they're associated with religions I don't belong to. E.g., I would never name my child Christina or Muhammed. Or even something like Veronica or Madeleine.

    Nor would I name a child Mark, etc., after my mother Marcia -- I wouldn't want to celebrate war (Mars). On the other hand, I would consider naming a son Dmitri.
  12. Jenny

    Jenny From the Bloc

    I know a kid named McKenna, and I'm guessing it's a family name. Problem is, the kid is a boy (is it just me, or is that not one's first guess?), with long blonde hair and quite cute. I'm sure when he gets to school age everyone is going to think he's a girl.
  13. Twilight1

    Twilight1 Well-Known Member

    Moses or Apple. No offense Gwenyth Paltrow
  14. loulou

    loulou Let It Snow

    Did you tell her missing consonants were making the job harder?

    It's not one of my absolute favourites, but Lolita is indeed a pretty nice name. Was it at the beginning of the book (sorry, I read it a long time ago) that Nabokov said - I googled it:

    I was in some highschool with brother and sister Sun Ra and Tantra. I was once introduced with brother and sister Blue and Strawberry.
  15. liv

    liv Well-Known Member

    I think names are ridiculous if they have apostrophes in them. Those are usually used when letters are missing, like in don't for do not... so what is missing in those names? I also dislike names starting with La or Le... like LaShawn... it makes it sound French and not even the French do that unless it's a last name and has a purpose.
  16. Nan

    Nan Just me, retired

    The woman I shared a hospital room with when I had my third daughter was very soft spoken, so when the official came in to register her child's name, I don't really know what she said or how she spelled it, but the response from the official was, "Sweetheart, there has to be a vowel in there somewhere."
  17. TheGirlCanSkate

    TheGirlCanSkate Well-Known Member

    The thing about a ' or a - in a name is that the government won't recognize it. My daughter's social security card has it off as well as other legal documents. I knew it going in. The - was to honor my best friend (she has a -) and she rolled her eyes and said WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO HER????? :D Also Gerber won't recognize it - you can get a free silver plated engraved spoon from them and they sent it without the -. So the La-a of the world are really just Laa.
  18. aliceanne

    aliceanne Well-Known Member

    Oh I could see Mildred or Edna making a comeback. They were top of the list in the early 20th century, plus they have that ever popular unisex vibe. When I was school age Emily, Sarah, and Ava were considered quite dowdy. Robin, Karen, and Susan were the most popular names. I knew one Emily who always introduced herself by saying "I know, I know Emily reminds you of an old lady with a cat!".

    I always thought Dolores was a very dramatic name (Latin for sorrow).

    I don't think Agnes or Gertrude have ever gone away. There always seems to be one around.
  19. danceronice

    danceronice Corgi Wrangler

    ROTFL....though technically, if she used Y a lot....

    I have used a lot of names I like (Marcus/Mark, Alan, Kevin, Josef/Joszef, Juliet, Elaine, Nadia/Nadezhda) on book characters and would feel odd using them on a child. (And yes, clearly, I prefer old-world names with old-world spellings.) I cannot STAND trendy names, or names that don't include a reasonable amount of vowels. Family tree names are problematic as some of them aren't English-speaker friendly, though I've always liked my great-grandmother's name (Michaelina, usually went by Lena) and the perverse part of me likes Stanislas as it doesn't get more Polish than that (though undoubtedly like my oldest uncle it would end up Anglicized to Stanley.) Also a fan of Abigail, Laura, Mary, and of Ian, Malcolm, John, and Michael. Rebecca is a good one, as I have a good friend named Rebecca.
  20. gkelly

    gkelly Well-Known Member

    Really? So the government would consider Mary-Kate and Jim-Bob to be MaryKate and JimBob?
  21. KikiSashaFan

    KikiSashaFan Well-Known Member

    I used to work at a job where you had to wear a name tag, and if you forgot yours you had to wear one that said Gertrude. No one ever forgot more than once :lol:
    PeterG and (deleted member) like this.
  22. Jenny

    Jenny From the Bloc

    Actually that one I believe has a reason - as I understand it, the prefix le or la and I think also de is of African origins and means "of god" - thus the popularity among African Americans for names that begin with those letters. Given that it's technically a prefix, marking it with an apostrophe or hyphen makes some sense, rather than as a separate word, which can be confusing for forms and dbases. I think in the past it was usually just blended with the rest of the name, but I can see why it's become popular to highlight it given its meaning.
  23. cygnus

    cygnus Well-Known Member

    Friends of mine named their daughter L'lyn (pronounced "Ellen"), which is not even the correct use of the apostrophe, as there is no missing letter between the l's. The poor child will have a rough time with her name, as computers often won't reorganize the punctuation, and nobody can pronounce it let alone spell it.
  24. TheGirlCanSkate

    TheGirlCanSkate Well-Known Member

    Mary Kate and Jim Bob. They put in a space. So my daughter would be something like Mary Kate Elise Davenport instead of Mary-Kate Elise Davenport. She goes by Mary-Kate at school, on anything we write out.
  25. mkats

    mkats Well-Known Member

    I remember we played a basketball team once that had a player on it named God'sGift (his parents were missionaries).
  26. skatingfan5

    skatingfan5 Past Prancer's Corridor

    THey could have saved the poor kid some teasing and just named him Jonathan (which means gift from God), but I suppose they were going for something less subtle. :shuffle:
  27. Cachoo

    Cachoo Well-Known Member

    So everyone called him King?
  28. MacMadame

    MacMadame Cat Lady-in-Training

    You are lucky. Most of the Karens I know are beetches. :D

    As for the apostrophe, it's not just for missing letters. In other languages it's a glottal stop. And also sometimes just a pause.
  29. Badams

    Badams Well-Known Member

    A friend of mine was determined to name his child Chinacat Sunflower. Thank GOD they had a boy first, and grew up before the girl came. LOL!
  30. julieann

    julieann Well-Known Member

    I love how Oprah was born Orpah and since no one could pronounce it, Oprah is what they called her and she kept it. I doubt most would get it right anyway.

    I don't think Apple is anymore stupid than Penney or Paige. I just wouldn't name a newborn Bruce or Russell, it works for an adult but not a little baby.

    What about the parents who get so lazy they just name their boy 'Guy'?