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Anyone Work In HR? Gay issue question....

Discussion in 'Off The Beaten Track' started by Flatfoote, May 11, 2010.

  1. Debbie S

    Debbie S Well-Known Member

    I don't have a problem with that. This particular card (I don't remember a lot - it was 9 years ago) was just really super-religious, almost proselytizing (sp?). And like I said, the girl was young, and I thought maybe a little hint from mgmt (not directly, I didn't name names) would be a good idea for her personally, and it wouldn't hurt for others to be aware of the issue.

    But given that she was a recent college grad, I was almost a bit more annoyed....b/c shouldn't someone educated (in our modern times, lol) not be quite so clueless?
  2. my little pony

    my little pony war crawling into canada

    lol, you reminded me that when I was that age I'm pretty sure I gave out cards I got for free and probably had no idea what they said
  3. IceAlisa

    IceAlisa discriminating and persnickety ballet aficionado

    Oh the things educated people do. It's a whole other thread. In PI.
  4. Rob

    Rob Beach Bum

    But was it food from a Chinese restaurant? If it was a Thai or Japanese restaurant, and everyone called it Chinese food (a la the old 60s notion that anything or anyone Asian is Chinese), I might see her point. But how do you distinguish Chinese food from Thai or Japanese (very different) if you don't call it Chinese. I wonder how she refers to Mexican or Indian food?

    ITA with Andora, if people order the food with fake accents or jokes etc. that is another issue. My brother will ask if we want to go for Indian food using a fake Indian accent and I always tell him "not if you are going to speak in that manner."
  5. Debbie S

    Debbie S Well-Known Member

    LOL! Well, this girl lived at home and I figured she probably just took a bunch from the family stack. But I thought she should have realized not everyone she was giving one to shared her beliefs....or maybe she did. :shuffle:
  6. my little pony

    my little pony war crawling into canada

    No, it was a Chinese restaurant. The poor guy who did the ordering was about the quietest person I ever met. Asking the girl next to him if she wanted Chinese food once a week was probably the only time he spoke out loud. She complained constantly. Part of her job was to translate either Mandarin or Cantonese, I can't remember which. She also said that this objectified her and she didnt want to do it. But it was her only job function. When she refused to translate, she had no job duties left.
  7. Bev Johnston

    Bev Johnston Well-Known Member

    Not saying that she would, but tell her to be careful if she's thinking of using this as a defence.

    Case in point, a few years ago, my boss, another co-worker, and I were talking about the show "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy". I don't remember anything offensive that was said - just discussion of the show - but someone who was out to get my boss made a complaint against her for offensive language. She was "counseled", and during the meeting with HR, said that she thought it was really the pot calling the kettle black, considering that this guy discussed all of his sexual exploits in detail and didn't seem to care who overheard or was offended. Well, long story short, she got written up for not reporting him, which meant no merit increases or promotions until the undetermined warning period was over. He got off scot free.
  8. danceronice

    danceronice Corgi Wrangler

    This is why I wonder if the word "lesbian" was offensive, or if the person who reported her thought SHE was being insensitive.

    "Food of Asian origin"? I don't know whether to laugh or cry. What if it WAS Chinese? How about Chinese-American? If they ordered sushi could they call it Japanese? What if it was Japanese sushi made at a Chinese restaurant owned by Koreans?
  9. IceAlisa

    IceAlisa discriminating and persnickety ballet aficionado

    Damn, I missed a chance to feel objectified when I translated medical literature from Russian to English and back.
    ebayj and (deleted member) like this.
  10. Flatfoote

    Flatfoote Active Member

    Thanks for all the great input. Keep it coming! I should see her this weekend, and I will direct her to this thread.
  11. silverstars

    silverstars New Member

    I don't know how far your sister would want to take this, but Colorado does have LGBT employment discrimination laws that ban employers from discriminating against employees because of sexual orientation or gender identity (they actually have unusually strict laws--most states either don't have them at all or just have them for state employment). I think that certain LGBT groups have also started using Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964 (equal protection under the law regardless of race, gender, etc.) in order to combat discrimination in the workplace.

    Again, this might be farther than she wants to take things at the moment, but she's definitely protected under the law--especially if her workplace allows men to talk about women, but then had her written up for mentioning that she's a lesbian (that's something that could turn her case into one of obvious discrimination, since they're enforcing something on one group, but not another). If things get worse, she can always looking into the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission and see if they can do anything for her.
  12. Karina1974

    Karina1974 Well-Known Member

    Damn, I'm glad bullshit like this doesn't go on where I work. But then again, at 35 I'm the 2nd youngest in an office filled with 40+ and 50+ year-old people (aka -- people who actually have "been around" and have a respectable amount of life experience). We're in that office to sell steel. Period. Not to push our own personal agendas in everyone's face.
  13. genegri

    genegri Active Member

    I am sorry your sister has to deal with this kind of BS.
  14. CantALoop

    CantALoop Well-Known Member

    What if an employee was a minority and said as a joke, "If you get lost, just ask people where the [ethnicity] person lives, I'm the only one in town!" It'd be just plain strange if someone of another background got offended just because that person is different.

    As for the Chinese food one, talk about making something out of nothing. :rolleyes: However, if it was a Margaret Cho "Asian chicken salad" sort of situation, then she might have something. :p
    Last edited: May 12, 2010
  15. Louis

    Louis Well-Known Member

    Now I KNOW we work for the same company. I have heard this story through independent sources and always thought it was folklore. I guess not!


    This is sadly not the most ridiculous HR "diversity" issue I've come across.
  16. made_in_canada

    made_in_canada INTJ

    ((flatfoote's sister)) I'd be furious... No advice to give, just my sympathy and a renewed desire to do my part.
  17. essence_of_soy

    essence_of_soy Well-Known Member

    Margaret Cho would love the Chinese food complaint. I'll have to send it to her website.

    In future, maybe there should be a picture board for people in the office to reference so that words people find offensive to the ears, can be indicated with a pointer or hand held laser instead.

    For example, Chinese food can be a panda eating bamboo shoots, and lesbians can be a two lemons towing a U-Haul.
  18. Finnice

    Finnice Well-Known Member

    (((Flatfoot´s sister))) Again, no good advices, although I wish they should be forced to stop discrimination at her workplace.

    What a BS, really!
  19. vesperholly

    vesperholly Well-Known Member

    But self-referential jokes don't seem so harmful to me. And she didn't even use a slur! :rolleyes:

    ETA CantALoop, the :rolleyes: is at the situation, not you :)
    Last edited: May 12, 2010
  20. CantALoop

    CantALoop Well-Known Member

    Oops, I guess my post was ambiguous, but yes I agree.that referring to herself as a lesbian is no more offensive than referring to oneself with other descriptors such as religion, or ethnic background.
  21. Auntie

    Auntie Well-Known Member

    The write up is complete and utter BS but I wonder if there is something else going on in the work environment. Are "they" (a disgruntled coworker, dissatisfied manager, budget cutters, etc. ) looking for excuses to reprimand her?
  22. talulabell

    talulabell Well-Known Member

    You've already gotten lots of great advice from other, more knowledgeable folks here. The only thing I was going to do was to stress the suggestion to document everything. I'm curious as to what the write-up actually says. But it does sound, to me, like it's a definite case of discrimination.

    I just cant believe the one about the Chinese food. It actually is a Chinese restaurant, that serves Chinese food... how is that "objectifying"? Can people say they’re getting Italian food, or do they have to call it “food of a Mediterranean European origin”. I love how this person got hired to translate, and now feels objectified and wont do it. Sounds like someone has issues.
  23. overedge

    overedge Janny uber

    Back in the day when there was lots of professional wrestling on TV, there was one network that was trying to increase its ratings outside the US. It told the commentators on one wrestling show that if a wrestler brought something into the ring like a chair, the commentators were no longer allowed to call it a "foreign object". It was to be referred to as an "international object".
  24. slicekw

    slicekw #ICanFixYourComputerButICan'tFixIceNetworkFreezes

    oh PLEASE PLEASE have her send it in to the Evil HR Lady. She'll love it and give amazing advice.
  25. IceAlisa

    IceAlisa discriminating and persnickety ballet aficionado

    I forgot about the Evil HR Lady! :lol:
  26. vesperholly

    vesperholly Well-Known Member

    I should ask her about my company. They want our bosses to give us driving tests. I do not work at the DMV nor do I drive/get mileage for work. The exact purpose — or potential consequences of not passing! — has not been explained.
  27. sk8pics

    sk8pics Well-Known Member

    My company does something similar, in that we have annual on-line training and have a fellow employee ride along with us and fill out a checklist on our driving. So it's a peer not your boss, but it's still :rolleyes:. The reason for it is that there are probably more injuries on and off the job related to driving than anything else. They have different categories of drivers depending on how often we drive for company business. I drive back and forth between two sites that are two miles apart, so I'm a frequent driver. Sigh.
  28. star_gazer11

    star_gazer11 practising choreo

    :lol: Great idea.
  29. Aussie Willy

    Aussie Willy Hates both vegemite and peanut butter

    Unless driving is a required part of your job then there should be no requirement to test someone's driving.

    However working in the safety area of where I work, we have so many incidents that come from driving. We even had someone hit a pedestrian recently. But most are people reversing back into poles.

    As for the initial post, I think that is crap. I would like to think these days that people who did complain about someone using the term "lesbian" should be severely reprimanded for being a knobhead.
    Flatfoote and (deleted member) like this.
  30. Ozzisk8tr

    Ozzisk8tr Well-Known Member

    Knobhead, I love it. :lol: "I'm writing you up because you're a knobhead".