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  1. #321

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gazpacho View Post
    I'm doing better, thanks. Last night I had a crying spell but recovered from it surprisingly quickly. I hope this is a sign of things to come.
    I hope it is, too!
    "Liking this sport is ridiculous, so you’re a little different for liking it, she explained. But you’re allowed to like what you like." - Robert Samuels

  2. #322

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    Spoke too soon. Woke up at around 4am in a panic and had a crying suicidal spell until about 9am despite taking a medication that is supposed to calm me down very fast.

    The fact that things vary day to day makes it harder because I don't know what to expect. If I know in advance when I will have bad days, then I can prepare for them. But I don't know.

    I'm still scared of ECT's cognitive side effects. There are memories I'd like to forget, of course, but you can't pick and choose what you remember and what you forget. It also supposedly leads to increased distractibility(sp?). I already need to take medication for attention deficit (which is a misnomer; it should be called attention regulation), so I fear that if I lose any more ability to concentrate, I wouldn't be able to drive a car or do many other things safely.

    The doctor admitted he didn't know much about ECT, just that he has a colleague who is getting trained in it and has seen many people do better after ECT.

    Insurance wouldn't cover the treatment, so it's kind of a moot point anyway.

    Thanks again for all your support.

  3. #323

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gazpacho View Post
    Spoke too soon. Woke up at around 4am in a panic and had a crying suicidal spell until about 9am despite taking a medication that is supposed to calm me down very fast.

    The fact that things vary day to day makes it harder because I don't know what to expect. If I know in advance when I will have bad days, then I can prepare for them. But I don't know.

    I'm still scared of ECT's cognitive side effects. There are memories I'd like to forget, of course, but you can't pick and choose what you remember and what you forget. It also supposedly leads to increased distractibility(sp?). I already need to take medication for attention deficit (which is a misnomer; it should be called attention regulation), so I fear that if I lose any more ability to concentrate, I wouldn't be able to drive a car or do many other things safely.

    The doctor admitted he didn't know much about ECT, just that he has a colleague who is getting trained in it and has seen many people do better after ECT.

    Insurance wouldn't cover the treatment, so it's kind of a moot point anyway.

    Thanks again for all your support.
    Unpredictability makes anything more difficult. One thing is predictable ... you can count on your friends at FSU for all the support we can provide to you.

  4. #324

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    Quote Originally Posted by attyfan View Post
    Unpredictability makes anything more difficult. One thing is predictable ... you can count on your friends at FSU for all the support we can provide to you.
    This; and this!

  5. #325

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    Sorry to hear about this today, Gazpacho. But yes, you can count on us being here. I continue to keep you in my thoughts. {{{Gazpacho}}}

  6. #326
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    Quote Originally Posted by attyfan View Post
    Unpredictability makes anything more difficult. One thing is predictable ... you can count on your friends at FSU for all the support we can provide to you.
    Definitely. It's so tough, but believe me, any progress is good. Even if the progress is backwards at times. It's still a step.

    But we'll always be here for you.

  7. #327

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    There are going to be ups and downs, unfortunately. I wish for your sake it were all ups. But I know we're all proud of you for fighting for things to get better. Your life and health and happiness are worth it.
    Charter member of the "We Always Believed in Ashley" Club and the "We Believe in Ricky" Club
    Old, lonely, pathos-hungry, and extremely gullible

  8. #328
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    Good morning Gazpacho. Saw your post in the DST thread. Hoping you are feeling better! Please let us know how it is going. XOXOXO
    Last edited by cruisin; 03-10-2014 at 09:44 PM.

  9. #329

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    (((Gazpacho))) I really wish I could do more to help you. Thanks for checking in with us and sharing your days -- it can't be easy. Just know that we care and are always here to listen.

  10. #330

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    Quote Originally Posted by attyfan View Post
    Unpredictability makes anything more difficult. One thing is predictable ... you can count on your friends at FSU for all the support we can provide to you.
    Nicely said. Yes, Gazpacho, you can always count on us. I hope you are feeling better. Hugs.

  11. #331

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    Sending support your way, Gazpacho.

  12. #332

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    Thanks everyone. I am continuing to feel a bit better. The sun going down later, especially after the clocks changed last weekend, is helping I think.

  13. #333
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gazpacho View Post
    Thanks everyone. I am continuing to feel a bit better. The sun going down later, especially after the clocks changed last weekend, is helping I think.
    Great to see your other post. Keep going, keep trying new things. We're with you all the way!

  14. #334

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gazpacho View Post
    Thanks everyone. I am continuing to feel a bit better. The sun going down later, especially after the clocks changed last weekend, is helping I think.
    I'm so glad!! For your sake I can even manage to be glad about Daylight Savings Time, which otherwise I hate.
    Charter member of the "We Always Believed in Ashley" Club and the "We Believe in Ricky" Club
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  15. #335
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    Gazpacho, so glad you checked in. and even more glad you are feeling better. I hope it continues to get better. I asked this before, but have you ever been diagnosed with Seasonal Affective Disorder?

  16. #336
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    Glad you are feeling better Gazpacho!

  17. #337

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    Quote Originally Posted by Anita18 View Post
    Great to see your other post. Keep going, keep trying new things. We're with you all the way!
    Seconding this!

  18. #338

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    Hope things are still looking up for you!
    "Liking this sport is ridiculous, so you’re a little different for liking it, she explained. But you’re allowed to like what you like." - Robert Samuels

  19. #339
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    Hi Gazpacho. It's been a few days since anyone has posted here. I am hoping that you are still experiencing a positive upswing. I think about you, a lot. Please let us know how you are. XOXO

  20. #340

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    I second that!
    Charter member of the "We Always Believed in Ashley" Club and the "We Believe in Ricky" Club
    Old, lonely, pathos-hungry, and extremely gullible

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