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  1. #41
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    Well some people you can just look at and decided for yourself.

    My question is, has Joubert come out yet?

  2. #42
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    Quote Originally Posted by euterpe View Post
    It's his choice to come out or not.
    It's not always necessary to make such a choice - it's not like Buttle has been concealing anything or pretending to be something he's not. From what I can tell, he's always just been himself, so no need to "come out."

  3. #43
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    Being gay and out since I was 16-17 (including while I was still skating), I can remember being a teenager and it being a big deal to me. I was damn proud of myself and wanted everyone to know! Over the years, I'm still just as "damn proud", but it's not something I necessarily even think about on a day to day basis. I think this holds true for many people, skaters or not. I can tell you with absolute confidence that there are a LOT more male figure skaters that are out there that are absolutely as gay as the day is long, many having boyfriends, that the casual fan will not ever know about. It has nothing to do with "not being out" - as many of them are completely among skaters, friends, family and the people in their lives - but about keeping their personal lives private from the entire world, which includes fans, who they very much enjoy. I know of one very prominent Canadian skater who dated an acquaintance of mine for quite some time... I have friends who have slept with well known skaters. It is what it is - none of anyone's business unless they choose to broadcast it from the rooftops. I sure do, but it's not for everybody, and I ABSOLUTELY respect that.

  4. #44
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    I always thought Jeff was a peter pan wannabe. I think if you are a male figure skater, people assume you are gay already so no need to come out. If you are a straight male skater, you might wanna come out.

  5. #45

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    Quote Originally Posted by VIETgrlTerifa View Post
    PeterG and maladiegrand totally hit it out of the park with their responses.
    I agree!

  6. #46
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    Quote Originally Posted by numbers123 View Post
    I use homosexual in my wording because it makes me feel uncomfortable to use the word gay. To me the word gay is offensive because so many of the straight population use it as an insult when calling names. To me, it is like using the words N***** or colored people or spics or pollacks. But I also have been told that many homosexuals wear the name of gay proudly - so I am torn on what wording to use or type.
    Just speaking for myself here, but I prefer the word gay. I think it summarizes who I am better than the word homosexual because, like others have mentioned, it's not all about sex. Of course, it is frustrating when people use gay as an insult. I refuse to let those people take ownership of that word though.


    Quote Originally Posted by numbers123
    I've stated before and will continue to say this to my straight friends and straight society: The person who is homosexual has no interest in being involved in my marriage or my straight relationships. I have no right to be involved in their relationships other than to fight for their rights to marry, to be recognized as a next of kin, etc.
    Thank you. ((numbers123))

  7. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by ks777 View Post
    If you are a straight male skater, you might wanna come out.
    I felt Michael Weiss did this throughout his career "My girlfriend Lisa...", "My fiance Lisa...", "My wife Lisa...", "My wife Lisa and kids...", "Yes, I'm the only skater married with kids...", "It's tough when I'm on the road and away from my wife Lisa and the kids...", "Oh, did I mention my wife Lisa and kids?"...

    I guess it's understandable, considering many do consider a straight male figure skater an oxymoron.

  8. #48
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    I am late to this conversation and I am sure this has probably been mentioned in the earlier pages - but:

    Honestly, I can't believe this is even being discussed.

  9. #49
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    Quote Originally Posted by duane View Post
    I felt Michael Weiss did this throughout his career "My girlfriend Lisa...", "My fiance Lisa...", "My wife Lisa...", "My wife Lisa and kids...", "Yes, I'm the only skater married with kids...", "It's tough when I'm on the road and away from my wife Lisa and the kids...", "Oh, did I mention my wife Lisa and kids?"..
    He could still be bi.

  10. #50

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    I think the innocent speculating is in sort of the same vein as posters wondering if their skating crush has a bf/gf. I think what some may have issue with regarding the "why should people even care, it's all about their skating" aspect is that in a way, you're de-sexualizing particular skaters either in a paternal protective way or in a "I don't want to think about them being gay" sort of way while posters don't have that attitude, in general, regarding most straight skaters (outside underaged ones obviously).

    There are tons of threads about skaters being porny (mostly straight male skaters) or asking who a skater is dating, etc. The only difference between a straight skater and an allegedly gay one is that the straight skaters never need to have their sexuality speculated on while the only way a gay skater can stop the speculation is by coming out or just doing something in public (like talk about their boyfriend/girlfriend on Twitter). Although I have seen a few posters on another forum who try to speculate or even accuse straight skaters (I say straight in that that's how they present themselves in public) of being gay, but do it in some demeaning way as if it somehow makes them less-than because they were not being honest. Some posters even use it as an insult. It is interesting to note that it was mostly openly gay posters who were doing that.

    Anyway, how are we defining "coming out?" I think some people think it means making a big declaration, while others are saying it's just simply not hiding it, not necessarily making a big deal about it.

  11. #51
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    Quote Originally Posted by duane View Post
    I felt Michael Weiss did this throughout his career "My girlfriend Lisa...", "My fiance Lisa...", "My wife Lisa...", "My wife Lisa and kids...", "Yes, I'm the only skater married with kids...", "It's tough when I'm on the road and away from my wife Lisa and the kids...", "Oh, did I mention my wife Lisa and kids?"...

    I guess it's understandable, considering many do consider a straight male figure skater an oxymoron.
    But to me, this has always been one of the tragedies of homophobia--that it has kept gay people from being able to talk about their partners and families publicly.

    My husband is a very important part of my life. If I were a public figure, I would talk about him because it would be very hard not to in some situations; he is part of almost everything I do and it would be very difficult to talk about my personal life in any way without mentioning him.
    "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."-- Albert Einstein.

  12. #52
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    Quote Originally Posted by Prancer View Post
    But to me, this has always been one of the tragedies of homophobia--that it has kept gay people from being able to talk about their partners and families publicly.

    My husband is a very important part of my life. If I were a public figure, I would talk about him because it would be very hard not to in some situations; he is part of almost everything I do and it would be very difficult to talk about my personal life in any way without mentioning him.
    I agree.

  13. #53

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    I say to all the people who choose to live their lives as openly and freely as they want to be. The day that I look forward to is when being openly gay isn't news anymore, but rather that people make news for their accomplishments or how about just being all around good people? I know we are still a long way from that day, but as an openly gay man myself, I'd rather make news for raising money for cancer research or winning a sports championship, or whatever else, not for loving who I love.

    Until that happens though, everyone should be free to encourage and express who they are as individuals, that's especially true for those feeling isolated, Gay or Straight, If we have more resources to help people be who they want to be, then all the better.
    Kyle

  14. #54

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    I don´t care a bit if somebody is gay or heterosexual, if I don´t plan to date them.

    I do care very much about all the sexual orientations getting the same civil rights and to be equal.

  15. #55
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    Quote Originally Posted by N_Halifax View Post
    Being gay and out since I was 16-17 (including while I was still skating), I can remember being a teenager and it being a big deal to me. I was damn proud of myself and wanted everyone to know! Over the years, I'm still just as "damn proud", but it's not something I necessarily even think about on a day to day basis. I think this holds true for many people, skaters or not. I can tell you with absolute confidence that there are a LOT more male figure skaters that are out there that are absolutely as gay as the day is long, many having boyfriends, that the casual fan will not ever know about. It has nothing to do with "not being out" - as many of them are completely among skaters, friends, family and the people in their lives - but about keeping their personal lives private from the entire world, which includes fans, who they very much enjoy. I know of one very prominent Canadian skater who dated an acquaintance of mine for quite some time... I have friends who have slept with well known skaters. It is what it is - none of anyone's business unless they choose to broadcast it from the rooftops. I sure do, but it's not for everybody, and I ABSOLUTELY respect that.
    Where is the applause emoticon. Thank you for articulating my frustration with this topic.

    This reminds me of a gay friend of mine who'd say, "Ask me what you want, but be prepared for me to ask you the same thing in return." Translation: It's none of anyone's damn business.

    Certainly in Australia, a few of the elite skaters are gay, but unfortunately the sport here is quite gossipy, bitchy and homophobic from the inside out. A friend of mine who was a judge was always upset with me for acting gay around him, particularly when he was with his skating friends. I guess he felt gay by association, so I'd really play it up just to make a point.

  16. #56
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    Quote Originally Posted by kylet3 View Post
    The day that I look forward to is when being openly gay isn't news anymore, but rather that people make news for their accomplishments or how about just being all around good people?
    I think that day is already here in many ways - Buttle himself has made headlines countless times over the years for his athletic achievements, his work as a choreographer continues to be discussed (and admired), and he's generally referred to as a good person.

    It's not for everyone in every situation, but I think the fact that Buttle never hid anything and just lived his life paved the way for everyone to focus on his accomplishments and personality, rather than distraction about whether or not he was gay being the main topic of discussion around him, as it has been with some others.

  17. #57

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    I never understood why ppl are obsessed
    with someone's sexual preference .. It's their
    business .. Why are ppl so intrusive fan or not ?

  18. #58

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    I think a person's sexual preference is such a basic and important part of who they are. I don't blame people for wanting to know. What I wish for is that it can be told without any concern for negative stigma or social reprocussion. Obviously, we're not there yet, judging by the sensitivity of this topic. Whether you prefer men or women partners should be no more sensitive a topic than whether you prefer chocolate or vanilla ice cream. But that's not the case in our world today.

  19. #59
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fozzie Bear View Post
    Just speaking for myself here, but I prefer the word gay. I think it summarizes who I am better than the word homosexual because, like others have mentioned, it's not all about sex. Of course, it is frustrating when people use gay as an insult. I refuse to let those people take ownership of that word though.
    Thanks - that helps me understand.

  20. #60

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    Really?? My sexual presence is part of who I am.
    How shallow is that. What flavor I prefer does not
    Shed any light on me as a person , professionally etc.
    That's the problem judge me know me for me. Not
    who I'm attracted to. It's like clicks in high school.
    That's why this world is the way it is. Ppl should Mind there own Business.
    My View...

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