I think it would help if at least they only allowed restarts from the point where the music stopped, and not from the element that was missed. V&M didn't abort a lift (it never went up) but they did skate through it. They should have been allowed to start the program when the music had stopped and then it would be their choice to resume the program (and skip the lift) or to try to cram in the lift in a different section of the music (and risk messing up their timing on all the other elements). BTW, they had a big enough lead over Chock/Bates that they would have had silver even if they didn't get the 10+ points the lift was worth.
I also find the referee's reaction the French team curious, although well-intentioned I am sure. I don't think the intent of the rule is "oh dear, don't withdraw, you have 3 minutes to rest!" I thought the 3 minutes was there to limit the time (I can't find a video of the Zhangs but I think their stop was substantially longer), basically to say if your problem is so big that it can't be resolved in 3 minutes, you're done. I expect that at least the ISU will issue clarification there, and more likely, they will come up with either a deduction or rule change.