what happens when you cross an elephant and a rhinicerous?
Little skateycat got out of school early yesterday and lunch was at home. Elephino gave me a chance to use my linguist training and whip out a three-line translation for the answer to the joke.
What do you call a cow with now legs? Ground beef.
What crime did the peanut complain about? He was a-salted.
What did the mommy tomato say to her slow baby tomato? Ketchup!
When hugging a grammar nazi, I always say "there, their, they're."
Why did the elephant have 3 white sneakers and one yellow sneaker?
He forgot to lift his leg.
What happened to the butcher who backed into the meat grinder?
He got a little behind in his work.
the Founders ...left us the keys to a system of self-government, the tools to do big things and important things together that we could not possibly do alone --Barack Obama
Not sure how old your son is, so I'm not sure if this joke would work for him. But I think it's a good one anyway:
An executive was interviewing a young woman for a position in his company. He wanted to learn something about her personality, so he asked, "if you could have a conversation with anyone, living or dead, who would it be?"
She quickly responded, "The living one."
I'm off to the Patrick Chan threads...where you can watch a molehill become a mountain in seconds!!!
A few more from the Laffy Taffy jar:
Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
What does a 500 pound parakeet say? TWEET!!
What happened to the wind? It blew away.
Why is your nose in the middle of your face? Because it's the scenter.
What kind of candy gets the giggles? Laffy Taffy!
Am I there yet?
I saw this one on Facebook:
What do you call a motorcycle that likes to tell jokes?
"Michelle would never be caught with sausage grease staining her Vera Wang." - rfisher
What was Eeyore looking at in the toilet?
He was looking at Pooh.
The first joke I can remember being told as a kid was What has four wheels and flies? A garbage truck.
Not exactly kid-appropriate, but this one always makes me laugh: A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walked into a bar. None of them saw it.
What is grey and has a trunk?
A mouse on vacation.
"Me, cutie/chicken, the egg cup, I am the hammer of my spoon!"--Jen_Faith translation