Page 11 of 12 FirstFirst ... 9101112 LastLast
Results 201 to 220 of 227
  1. #201
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Left of Center
    Posts
    1,259
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    17
    Quote Originally Posted by michiruwater View Post
    Should we just automatically assume that the father does not do his bit? I mean, shouldn't that be a pretty fair assumption to make?
    Ah, yeah...
    That is what I just said. It is to be assumed that the father does his bit. If he doesn't, then he ought to have to testicles removed with a rusty spoon.

  2. #202
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    624
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by OliviaPug
    I was just trying to give you some insight into the whys behind other folks commenting that you are

    O-

    The thing is, none of the women who say things like this to me are struggling financially. Each of them could afford to take a few years off of work if they so desire.
    But, they don't want to! Which, of course, is perfectly fine - or at least it should be! Unfortunately, enter the "Mommy Wars" and Bill Sears...
    Women are made to feel guilty for wanting to go back to work. So they make excuses for going back, and tell themselves that they would *prefer* to stay home. If only they *could* (sigh).
    My SIL just loves to tell me that she envies me so much. She wishes she could afford to stay home. She even has the option of going part time for a few years, but "can't" do that either - 'cause, well, then their household income might fall below $200k for a few years.
    I know a stay at home mom who seems to have it all-Wealthy husband, housekeeper, new luxury vehicles every year or so, vacations abroad, etc. I used to sort of hate her because she had it so "easy", until I found out that one of her daughters is special needs, will likely always need specialized care, and recently developed seizures. Most of her care is provided by her Mother, so she's not fobbing that responsibility off. She'll never be "free".

    The grass is not always greener. How do you think the Father of your children feels about having to bust his ass to support four people? Instead of envying others who have "more" than you do, why not make frieds with those communal Hispanic women in your area? Maybe you could meet someone you click with who could provide company and share baby sitting with.

  3. #203
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Left of Center
    Posts
    1,259
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    17
    Quote Originally Posted by leesaleesa View Post
    The grass is not always greener. How do you think the Father of your children feels about having to bust his ass to support four people? Instead of envying others who have "more" than you do, why not make frieds with those communal Hispanic women in your area? Maybe you could meet someone you click with who could provide company and share baby sitting with.
    Whatever....

    I get annoyed at women telling me that I'm "lucky" - women who could easily afford to stay home themselves, but choose not to (which, of course, is perfectly fine) and somehow that means that I lack empathy?
    I'm annoyed at women who feel entitled to an opinion about lifestyle, in spite of the fact that they have made different choices in life.

    Boy, judging other women is sure a good time! Trying to see things from someone else's point of view?
    It's nice that you have so much sympathy for my "poor husband" though. I'll be sure to let him know. That ought to give him a laugh. He has a posh management job with low stress and a good salary. D

  4. #204
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    624
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    If you don't want to be "judged" maybe you shouldn't post online how people are lucky they're not in the same room with you when they dare to comment on your public comments, wish people dead, and want to remove some poor guy's testicles with a rusty spoon.

    Yeah, I do feel sorry for your husband. A lot.
    Last edited by leesaleesa; 10-06-2012 at 10:21 PM.

  5. #205
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Left of Center
    Posts
    1,259
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    17
    Quote Originally Posted by leesaleesa View Post
    Yeah, I do feel sorry for your husband. A lot.


    Honey, are you married?
    Last edited by TygerTyger; 10-06-2012 at 10:28 PM.

  6. #206
    Saint Smugpawski
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Cutting Down Privet Because Food Prices Are Going Up Next Year
    Posts
    11,725
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    33860
    TygerTyger, I would gladly watch your kiddies for a few hours in exchange for the entertainment of watching you detach some testicles with a rusty spoon. I don't mind watching kids as long as I get something useful out of the deal. Money isn't always necessary for me, I'm all for bartering and slapstick entertainment counts for a lot in my world. I don't even care whose testicles you detach, you pick.
    The fastest thing out of New Jersey since Tricky Nicky in a Muscovian handbasket

  7. #207
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Left of Center
    Posts
    1,259
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    17
    Quote Originally Posted by Southpaw View Post
    TygerTyger, I would gladly watch your kiddies for a few hours in exchange for the entertainment of watching you detach some testicles with a rusty spoon. I don't mind watching kids as long as I get something useful out of the deal..
    DEAL!

    Rick Santorum is coming to WA to speak out against the legalization of Gay Marriage. Clearly his testicles need to go!

    Vote "Yes" on R-74!

  8. #208
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Posts
    23,859
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    Just want to say I know some couples who adopted/raised babies born with drugs in their system. While it worked out long-term, for the first couple years it was complete hell. And that's with no other children in the picture. I don't know how much that applies to tygertyger, but anyone willing to take in a baby born to a meth addict has my respect.

    And yes, it does get better. So hang in there.

  9. #209
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Looking for cupcakes
    Posts
    30,765
    vCash
    5550
    Rep Power
    0
    Yes, drug addicted babies are extremely taxing. I have only taken care of those babies for a very short time with lots of other people around to give me a break or two. If you are caring for an addicted baby 24/7/365 plus another infant, you may feel like no one understands what you are going through and the amount of energy is required.

    If you are caring for a drug addicted baby, you may not feel you can go out of your house/living room because you don't know what to anticipate or if you can handle everything - including the people who will tell you how you should raise your children. Comments such as "can't you control your children. You shouldn't take children out in public if you can't control them, blah,blah, blah..."

  10. #210
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    624
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    Honey, are you married?
    Not anymore, ma cher. Rather than stay and stew in misery and resent him, I left. I chose to remember the good and learn from the bad. Plenty of people have it much better than me, and plenty have it worse.

  11. #211
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Left of Center
    Posts
    1,259
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    17
    [QUOTE=leesaleesa;. Plenty of people have it much better than me, and plenty have it worse.[/QUOTE]

    It isn't a competition. Just because I'm frustrated, and a bit overwhelmed, doesn't mean that I think I "have it worse" than other people.

    My husband wants to know if the concern shown him on this thread translates to dollars. He would like to buy a pressure-washer

    Thanks to the ladies who have cared for drug exposed infants. So far our little guy is healthy. He does have a few minor physical issues. But, of course, there is no way to definitely pin them on the BM's Meth use.

    His behavior has been fairly normal so far. Though is is higher energy than our biological son. Most of the stress has been waiting for the results of various tests (BM has HIV and HEP C) and also the prolonged and expensive process of terminating the BM's parental rights (she refused to sign him over.)

  12. #212
    Saint Smugpawski
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Cutting Down Privet Because Food Prices Are Going Up Next Year
    Posts
    11,725
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    33860
    Quote Originally Posted by TygerTyger View Post
    My husband wants to know if the concern shown him on this thread translates to dollars. He would like to buy a pressure-washer
    Since you seem like the sort of married couple who knows how to negotiate with a free agent like me, tell your husband that if he lets me watch you detach HIS testicles with a rusty spoon I'll buy him the pressure washer myself.
    The fastest thing out of New Jersey since Tricky Nicky in a Muscovian handbasket

  13. #213
    Registered User
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    the other FSU
    Posts
    3,687
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by TygerTyger View Post
    His behavior has been fairly normal so far. Though is is higher energy than our biological son. Most of the stress has been waiting for the results of various tests (BM has HIV and HEP C) and also the prolonged and expensive process of terminating the BM's parental rights (she refused to sign him over.)
    What was your brother (or was it your husbands brother) thinking, and is he at least helping with this?

  14. #214
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Left of Center
    Posts
    1,259
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    17
    Quote Originally Posted by susan6 View Post
    What was your brother (or was it your husbands brother) thinking, and is he at least helping with this?
    The little guy was born to my husband's sister. She has no idea who the biological father was. She assumes that he was conceived via a act of prostitution. Who ever he was, he didn't come forward in the time legally given after being served by publication, and so his rights were terminated.

  15. #215

    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    My house
    Posts
    4,848
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    13314
    Quote Originally Posted by TygerTyger View Post
    The little guy was born to my husband's sister. She has no idea who the biological father was. She assumes that he was conceived via a act of prostitution. Who ever he was, he didn't come forward in the time legally given after being served by publication, and so his rights were terminated.
    That poor baby. Thank God he has you.
    Team Peeps!

  16. #216
    podcast mistress
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Ready to interview Uncle Dickie at any time.
    Posts
    7,823
    vCash
    2367
    Rep Power
    4368
    Well, I for one would hate to be a SAHM, even if I had the money to do it. It's not in me to be maternal all day every day. And I don't feel one ounce of guilt over it. My nanny is amazing with the baby, and our older one goes to a great school that he loves and is working well for him. If I were home with them all the time I'd go nuts.

    I adore my kids, but don't feel that maternal, and never did. As Miranda on Sex and The City said, " I don't like anyone's kids but my own." I've been told by a few people that I'm a great mom, and my kids are healthy and happy.
    In my spare time, I like to interview figure skating legends.

  17. #217
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Rejecting your reality and substituting my own
    Age
    30
    Posts
    11,004
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by TygerTyger View Post
    It isn't a competition. Just because I'm frustrated, and a bit overwhelmed, doesn't mean that I think I "have it worse" than other people.
    Very true. I think some people do have it harder (or make it harder on themselves ), but it doesn't make them better people for suffering more. Suffering sucks no matter what the cause or extent.

    Quote Originally Posted by manleywoman View Post
    Well, I for one would hate to be a SAHM, even if I had the money to do it. It's not in me to be maternal all day every day. And I don't feel one ounce of guilt over it. My nanny is amazing with the baby, and our older one goes to a great school that he loves and is working well for him. If I were home with them all the time I'd go nuts.

    I adore my kids, but don't feel that maternal, and never did. As Miranda on Sex and The City said, " I don't like anyone's kids but my own." I've been told by a few people that I'm a great mom, and my kids are healthy and happy.
    My mom is like this. She was sooo glad once we were out of the house. She spoils her dogs more than she ever did us. She was never an exemplary example of a traditional housewife, but was caring and able to teach us good values and IMO that's really all that's required of being a "good" parent.

    I feel so bad for my coworker. I asked her what she was doing this weekend, and she sighed and said, "Kid stuff. Soccer games, soccer coaching, gymnastics, cooking, cleaning..." I'm sure she could let up on say, her ridiculously high standard of cleanliness for just one weekend, but she feels like a terrible mother if she lets a single speck fall on the floor anywhere in her house. I wish she could give herself a break.

  18. #218
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Left of Center
    Posts
    1,259
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    17
    Quote Originally Posted by Badams View Post
    That poor baby. Thank God he has you.
    It's kind of you to say that.

  19. #219
    Saint Smugpawski
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Cutting Down Privet Because Food Prices Are Going Up Next Year
    Posts
    11,725
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    33860
    Quote Originally Posted by Anita18 View Post
    I feel so bad for my coworker. I asked her what she was doing this weekend, and she sighed and said, "Kid stuff. Soccer games, soccer coaching, gymnastics, cooking, cleaning..." I'm sure she could let up on say, her ridiculously high standard of cleanliness for just one weekend, but she feels like a terrible mother if she lets a single speck fall on the floor anywhere in her house. I wish she could give herself a break.
    Why do you feel sorry for her? There's nothing on that list that she didn't volunteer herself for and go into willingly. If she's wants to be a neurotic housekeeper that's her choice, just like it's your choice if you want to spend an afternoon napping contentedly. Should your co-worker feel sorry for you because you enjoy napping?

    I understand feeling sorry for someone if they catch a bad break or run into a streak of bad luck or are the victim of forces beyond their control or even if they made a stupid decision somewhere along the line that negatively impacted their life, but volunteer soccer coaching? She can quit. That would give her more time to run the vacuum cleaner 5 times a day.
    The fastest thing out of New Jersey since Tricky Nicky in a Muscovian handbasket

  20. #220

    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    My house
    Posts
    4,848
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    13314
    I WISH I had the compulsive cleaner gene! But instead, I have the compulsive exerciser gene.
    Team Peeps!

Page 11 of 12 FirstFirst ... 9101112 LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •