OK, I feel weird saying this here, but partly I need to get this off my chest and partly I want to know if there's anything I can do for this person.
A lady I work with has a husband (they've been married 25 years, but she says he's the only boyfriend she's ever had, they've been together since she was something like 16 or 17) who's very controlling. She tells me & others at work things about him, I for one don't know if she's looking for sympathy, if it's a cry for help, or what exactly is going on.
She's worked there about 6 months, in that time she's said he tells her the following :
- he won't "allow" her to work certain early morning shifts as it disturbs his sleep
- he doesn't speak to their daughter or granddaughter and he doesn't allow her to buy Xmas gifts for them. I told her she should anyway, she answered, she couldn't she'd feel too guilty
- he told her she should be willing to work 7 days a week
- doesn't allow her to wear makeup because "who's she trying to impress?"
She's said other things before, like she doesn't really have any girlfriends, I'm not sure if that has anything to do with him "allowing" it or not. Same she doesn't drive, but I'm not sure if that's by choice or not.
The real clincher happened the other day when I asked her if she'd like to contribute towards a birthday gift for another coworker. She answered "Joe" took my cards away and won't let me have any money. If she wants money she has to ask him for it.
I'm at the point when this guy comes in I don't want to talk to him. But I don't want to get her in trouble either....but if she's willing to talk openly at work about him, she shouldn't be surprised when people form strong opinions IMO....
Any thoughts/advice would be appreciated. Thank you.