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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Louise View Post
    At least the baby survived and will never have to worry about her mother putting her life in danger again.
    Did you think through this remark at all? Just curious. What a horrible thing to say.

    I read this today and thought it summed it up well:

    http://thestir.cafemom.com/toddler/1..._sacrifice_for

  2. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahclear View Post
    I read this today and thought it summed it up well:

    http://thestir.cafemom.com/toddler/1..._sacrifice_for
    I thought that was pretty horrid, actually. The mom made the best of the situation by getting the baby clear of the train, but in no way is she a hero, nor did she make "the ultimate sacrifice". And the line that she must have crossed under the safety bars purely out of a mother's need to get her baby home as quickly as possible...well, that's just romancing the hell out of it.
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  3. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahclear View Post
    Did you think through this remark at all? Just curious. What a horrible thing to say.
    If I witnessed this happening and the mother survived, I'd have called 911 and then Child Protective Services (useless as I've found them to be).

    This was no less dangerous than dangling a child from her ankles out a window or driving drunk at 90 mph with a child unrestrained in the car.

    I have a lot of sympathy for the child (hopefully she won't remember this), but calling this mother a hero is a bit far fetched. :

  4. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahclear View Post
    Did you think through this remark at all? Just curious. What a horrible thing to say.
    Horrible, maybe, but all too true. But then again, I can remember working at a NYS Thruway rest stop gas station and seeing a car come in from Canada with a woman in the front passenger seat holding a toddler on her lap. In blatent disregard for NYS law as it relates to where children are supposed to be riding in any vehicle, and in what type of restraint. If I hadn't been so busy running things (the shift leader was out on a road call so I was alone), I'd have called the State Trooper dispatch and reported that car.

    Louis, ITA. If I had been a witness, and the mother had actually survived, she'd have had at least 4 new assholes by the time I got done with her. Sheer stupidity. Whatever happened to Safety First?

  5. #25
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    Ok fine, I get it. A little overly sentimental. But saying the child is better off with a dead mother? Beyond the pale IMO.

  6. #26
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    What's so unfortunate is that she had a second chance, if you will: the article states it got stuck the first time, she got it free, and then kept going and it got stuck again. For chrissakes, pick the stroller up a few inches and walk with it to be clear of the rails.
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  7. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by genevieve View Post
    I thought that was pretty horrid, actually. The mom made the best of the situation by getting the baby clear of the train, but in no way is she a hero, nor did she make "the ultimate sacrifice". And the line that she must have crossed under the safety bars purely out of a mother's need to get her baby home as quickly as possible...well, that's just romancing the hell out of it.
    Exactly. Saving time isn't THAT important, especially for a parent. My mom told me she once dropped everything and left a store when I started to throw a tantrum. Would she have been a better mother had she plowed ahead and let me yell my head off for the sake of saving time and getting all the errands done? I don't think many people here would agree.

    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahclear View Post
    Ok fine, I get it. A little overly sentimental. But saying the child is better off with a dead mother? Beyond the pale IMO.
    No, I agree with that part. If she'd had a really close call (like if the stroller had been destroyed but both people were safe), the child might be stuck with a stupid mother but there could have been a wiser grandma at home to smack some common sense into said mother. Death is too harsh a punishment for mere stupidity, but unfortunately that's what her punishment was.

  8. #28

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    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahclear View Post
    Ok fine, I get it. A little overly sentimental. But saying the child is better off with a dead mother? Beyond the pale IMO.
    I read that line as sarcastic, snarking on the mother's priorities in choosing to cross the tracks in the first place. I.e., better late for wherever they were headed than orphaned.

    Which, yes, speaking ill of the dead, not in great taste. But not the same as actually claiming the kid is better off without the mother.

  9. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahclear View Post
    Did you think through this remark at all? Just curious. What a horrible thing to say.
    You know, rereading what I wrote it does sound a bit less than compassionate. This was a horrible tragedy, but oh so easily avoidable and somewhat predictable. What I meant was if the mother showed that kind of blatant lack of judgement, who knows if the next day the mother does something else that puts her little girl's life in danger. Not just health, but LIFE.

    Can you imagine the outrage if the Mom made a run for it if she could not get the stroller loose and only the baby was killed? She'd be villified. And if this baby girl did not get free and died with the mother she'd be villified for that too. What I meant was that at least this baby girl does not have to worry about a caretaker putting her life in danger again with such egregious lack of judgment.

    It just boggles the mind, because I'm sure we've all seen a movie or tv show where someone does something so predictably stupid like this and pays the price. Why tempt fate? I'm sure this has probably been done before, down to the stroller getting stuck. Too bad Superman didn't arise out of the blue and swoop down and save them... I mean, REALLY, lights and bells are going off, the RR arms go down, and then you have some clueless or reckless mother with a *baby stroller* going through the gates and, quel surprise, it gets stuck and the train keeps blowing it's horn until it runs them down.

    I feel sorry that the mother paid the ultimate price for her error in judgment. Who knows, maybe that's the first stupid thing she's ever done in her life. I certainly do not think the child is 'better off' without her mother, but the child might have been better off in the care of someone else like the grandmother with the mother only getting supervised visits. Seriously, who would have done this? On other boards people are criticizing anyone who calls attention to how stupid this was, saying, you all would probably have done the same thing. Uh, no.

    When I was growing up a family had a burmese python and two toddlers. I'm sure you can imagine what happened there too. Sometimes people are just SOOOOO stupid, that you get so angry and want to scream. I don't want to sound heartless, but some people are too stupid to live, and in the process they harm others with their stupidity.

    Just a very sad tragedy.
    Last edited by Louise; 10-11-2011 at 02:27 AM.

  10. #30
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    my cousin died like this, but there was no baby. he got stuck on the tracks trying to beat it. he didnt work so it wasnt like he had to be anywhere. when people asked how he died, my grandfather used to say natural selection killed him.
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  11. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahclear View Post
    Ok fine, I get it. A little overly sentimental. But saying the child is better off with a dead mother? Beyond the pale IMO.
    I wonder if the people who feel this way plan on volunteering to do all the stuff the dead mother did for her baby? Feed her, bathe her, change her diapers, etc. Any takers?

  12. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by Louise View Post
    What I meant was if the mother showed that kind of blatant lack of judgement, who knows if the next day the mother does something else that puts her little girl's life in danger. Not just health, but LIFE.
    Or she could have learned from her mistake and been more careful in the future.

    All parents do stupid things at times. Luckily most of us survive anyway. But to think that we'd be better off without our parents because sometimes they do stupid things is ridiculous.
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  13. #33

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cupid View Post
    Where were the Good Samaritans that day?
    They didn't want to die. I would not have helped; a person is never going to win going up against a train. That's why the warning gates go down before the train actually arrives, because it takes time for the train to stop. I would do exactly what those who were there did - yell.

    Quote Originally Posted by MacMadame View Post
    All parents do stupid things at times.
    There's a difference between doing something stupid and doing something unsafe, and life threatening for you and/or your child.

  14. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by Angelskates View Post
    There's a difference between doing something stupid and doing something unsafe, and life threatening for you and/or your child.
    I don't agree. I think this mother was a moron and paid for it. But I find the idea that some people truly believe her child is better off now to be completely horrifying.
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  15. #35

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    Quote Originally Posted by MacMadame View Post
    I think this mother was a moron and paid for it. But I find the idea that some people truly believe her child is better off now to be completely horrifying.
    I agree. But I don't think doing something stupid is the same as doing something life threatening/dangerous not just for yourself but for someone else. She was more than than stupid, she was selfish.

  16. #36

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    Quote Originally Posted by Angelskates View Post
    She was more than than stupid, she was selfish.
    But she gave up her life for that of her child, which is arguably as selfless as a person can be.

    Who knew what her mindset was when she entered the tracks? She could have been panicked about something and in a hurry. And she didn't know the stroller would get stuck. . .

    So I don't know how fair it is to judge her stupidity? People do stupid things all the time that could potentially have negative consequences for themselves or some else. Even fatal consequences. Except, most people get away with it.

  17. #37
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    Yes, of course, she was an absolute idiot. But at least she was willing to pay for her stupidity by putting her child's life first. I just don't think "luck" is compatible with "motherless two year old." That little girl is now without the person pretty much every child psychologist will tell you is the most important in the first three years of life. I damn well hope she's got an awesome dad, grandma and aunties.

  18. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by MacMadame View Post
    But I find the idea that some people truly believe her child is better off now to be completely horrifying.
    I immediately took Louise's comments as sarcastic and angry at the mother because of her actions, and she later clarified her comments.

    As stated...what if both the mother and child had survived? No one would be calling the mother a hero for saving her child, but would be insisting that the child be removed and the mother charged with child endangerment. Of course, if the mother had survived and the baby killed, everyone would be calling for the mother's head.

    The mother was not just "stupid". She was reckless...putting herself and, even worse, her child's life in danger. And I don't think people do reckless, life-threatening things all the time--especially when their child's life is involved.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Civic View Post
    I wonder if the people who feel this way plan on volunteering to do all the stuff the dead mother did for her baby? Feed her, bathe her, change her diapers, etc. Any takers?
    Yes, because those menial tasks are what motherhood is all about.

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    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Naix-f6KSIg

    MST3K running commentary and goofy 1950s acting aside, railroad safety video still applies. It's not the train's fault.

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