Page 2 of 5 FirstFirst 1234 ... LastLast
Results 21 to 40 of 92

Thread: A bra?!

  1. #21

    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Toronto, Ontario
    Age
    26
    Posts
    2,055
    vCash
    400
    Rep Power
    985
    Quote Originally Posted by myhoneyhoney View Post
    Thank you! Those kinds of bras seem more appropriate than the typical one for women. I saw these at Walmart. Your basic sport bra style. These should work too, of course she'll want to decorate them with fabric glitter or something, hehehe.

    I wore those at age 8/9, but only because I truly needed them. I hated them because I was the only one in my class wearing a bra.

    Spoiler

    .
    There is a certain degree of peer pressure when it comes to young girls and bras. The only reason I hated them was because noone else was wearing them, not because they were uncomfortable or anything because they weren't. In your daughter's case, the only reason she wants to wear them is because her friends DO wear them (regardless of whether they need them or not). The good thing here is that when she starts to develop she probably won't have a hard time adjusting to having to wear a bra for real.
    I personally think it's perfectly fine, but then again it's not my kid. As long as it's cute and girly and not sexy, then why not?
    Good luck.

  2. #22
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Location
    Celebrating Jeremy Abbott's FS at 2014 Worlds...
    Posts
    21,222
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by myhoneyhoney View Post
    My first thought was "way too young" too, but am I being one of those moms who wants to keep her babies "babies"? Now I'm scouring online mommy boards and looks like 8/9/10 are the ages when girls start wanting to wear them these days. Maybe I can compromise with her and buy something like these at Target, more like cropped camis/sport bra style than the classic bra. I just showed these to her and she ♥ them. I guess these will be ok, not trampy at all.
    I getting your daughter one of those is fine - it's not a true "brassiere" with cups, padding, and adjustable straps.

    I'm not sure where it came from, but MiniCyn has always been fairly modest, and when she was in 4th grade, she asked if she could start wearing one. She wasn't starting to develop at that point, but she was becoming self-conscious about her upper chest (aka her "décolleté" - it feels strange to refer to the upper chest area of a child as such ) when she was wearing shirts that had a "V" or scoop neck (even though they weren't cut low enough to show anything ). We found a few pretty, youthful-looking (aka not sexy) ones for her to wear under her shirts, and she felt a lot more comfortable or secure (I suppose) with it. They also looked cute, but at the time, layered shirts/tanks with different colored straps were in style.

    When it came time for her to need a real bra, however, she fought tooth and nail about wearing one because she found them to be uncomfortable. Go figure .

    Quote Originally Posted by Southpaw View Post
    I don't see how one of those Target "bras" is really any worse than a dance leotard. Or a skating dress. It's not like the girl is going to be walking around with just the bra on, it's going to be worn under clothes.

    I'm in the "they grow up too fast why can't they just be kids" camp, too, but those Target "bras" just look like bathing suit tops to me.
    Exactly.

    As long as she's not trying to grow up too fast and isn't trying to be all hoochie, I don't see any problem at all with getting some of those.

  3. #23
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Cali baby
    Posts
    1,846
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    Oh don't worry, she an individual and she does stand up for herself. I heard enough from her teachers at last night's back to school night that she's not afraid to voice her opinion!

    Really, should I be resisting something that will help her cover up? Shouldn't I reserve that for if she wants to cover less?

  4. #24

    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    Location
    Thankfukky watching skating
    Posts
    13,674
    vCash
    317
    Rep Power
    41192
    Quote Originally Posted by myhoneyhoney View Post
    That's pretty much how it is as a parent.

    I also see those Target "bras" as cut off tank tops. She will be wearing them under clothes and not parading them around. I already broke her heart at the start of the school year when I said NO on the cell phone. (uh, yes, the majority of her classmates HAVE cells!) Hubby thinks it's ok for me to buy her some as long as they're the girly kinds. I'm going to try and call my mom to see what she thinks.
    You're the parent & you know your kid so IMO you should trust your instinct. I'm one of those who think they grow up too fast as it is, but I don't see any harm in granting this wish. At 8 they need something...I don't see where it matters whether it's a bra or an undershirt.

    My mother said no to lipstick when I was 12 but I don't think she would have said no to cute underwear if she could have afforded it. Unfortunately I needed a bra at 12 so we'll never know. And no one had cute underwear back then. The fanciest they ever got with young girl's underwear was days of the week panties.

  5. #25
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Location
    Celebrating Jeremy Abbott's FS at 2014 Worlds...
    Posts
    21,222
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by myhoneyhoney View Post
    Really, should I be resisting something that will help her cover up? Shouldn't I reserve that for if she wants to cover less?


    Makes sense to me. That's pretty much why I had no problem getting the cami-bra thingees for MiniCyn - what mother in her right mind is going to complain about her daughter wanting to expose less flesh?

    Now, if she comes home from school wanting to wear a thong or get a tramp stamp …….

  6. #26

    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    Location
    Thankfukky watching skating
    Posts
    13,674
    vCash
    317
    Rep Power
    41192
    I'm out of it...what's a tramp stamp?

  7. #27
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Cali baby
    Posts
    1,846
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Cyn View Post
    Now, if she comes home from school wanting to wear a thong or get a tramp stamp …….
    Hah, that's when she'll hear me tell her, "oh HELL NO! You're sooooo NOT gonna be a freakin' hoochie!"

  8. #28
    Corgi Wrangler
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Not Wearing Enough Sparkles
    Posts
    6,457
    vCash
    510
    Rep Power
    5546
    Quote Originally Posted by taf2002 View Post
    I'm out of it...what's a tramp stamp?
    Tattoo at the base of the spine/small of the back, visible if the person is wearing low-rise jeans...

  9. #29
    Registered User
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    USA
    Age
    32
    Posts
    2,274
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    tatto on your lower back

  10. #30
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Cali baby
    Posts
    1,846
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    I'm pretty sure a tramp stamp is a tattoo on the middle of the waist/hip/back area that shows above the waistline of jeans.

  11. #31
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Cali baby
    Posts
    1,846
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    oops, typed too slow... at least now I'm sure of what a tramp stamp is, lol

  12. #32
    Port de bras!!!
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Location
    Ravenclaw
    Posts
    30,139
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    34921
    Exactly, Cyn and myhoneyhoney. Save it for when she wants a tattoo, a piercing and a micromini.
    "Nature is a damp, inconvenient sort of place where birds and animals wander about uncooked."

    from Speedy Death

  13. #33
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    Dashing Between Bennetton and Krispy Kreme
    Posts
    2,457
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    Why spend more money than you have to?

  14. #34
    Bountifully Enmeshed
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    At the Christmas Bizarre
    Posts
    38,168
    vCash
    250
    Rep Power
    46915
    One of my friends' daughters was bugging her for a bra when the daughter was five. My daughter didn't want one until I insisted that the time had arrived (and now she never goes without ). Different strokes for very different girls.

    I'm really not sure what having a bra has to do with growing up too fast and not having one doesn't. It's a bra, or what passes for one at this age.

    I didn't wear an undershirt when I was eight; neither did anyone I knew. Why would I have needed one?
    "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."-- Albert Einstein.

  15. #35

    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Posts
    9,543
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    2819
    Quote Originally Posted by myhoneyhoney View Post
    My 8 year old daughter just surprised me with this. She asked if she could start wearing one. I asked her why? She said her friends at school wear them and showed them to her.
    This situation is not about “the bra”, it’s about conformity, peer-pressure, and wanting to do/have something “because others do/have it”.

    You’ve already asked her (good for you!) why she wants one. Ask her again, ask her if there are any practical utilitarian reasons why she should wear one (perhaps there are). If there are such (practical utilitarian) reasons and she can logically explain, buy her the darn bra, 1-2 bras for $5-$10 is not a big deal. It does not matter if her body needs it or not. If she is able to logically prove to you her reasons, other than “fitting in with the masses”, she deserves a reward.

    If her only reason is “others wear them” – say to her “If others jump out of a 5th-floor window, will you do it too”? You must cut the tendency at its root to want to “follow the masses” without thinking.

  16. #36

    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Location
    Vancouver Canada
    Age
    55
    Posts
    12,720
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    11600
    Quote Originally Posted by IceAlisa View Post
    Oh for goodness sake. I see toddler girls in bikini tops on the beach, covering/supporting what exactly?

    And so on. Much ado about nothing.
    Yes, it is part of gendering - teaching little girls to be female - even though they don't have anything to cover up in a bikini top

  17. #37
    gold dust woman
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
    Location
    Olympia, WA
    Age
    35
    Posts
    4,061
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    I really wanted a bra when I started 5th grade, since I noticed other girls wearing them. I had a horrible time asking my mom to get me one--which is odd, since I have a very good relationship with my mom. Anyway, she got me a few that year, even though I didn't really need them. I ended up not liking how they felt, and I wore stretchy camisoles until 7th grade.

    Everyone is different! You might end up getting the bras and your daughter won't like them!

  18. #38

    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    the rink of course!
    Posts
    3,214
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    830
    May I suggest Justice (formerly Limited Too) cami tops? All the girls wear cami's as an undershirt these days - albeit with the pretty lace showing at the bottom and sparkly straps at the top. I think the layered look is what most are after. As cold and rainy as it is here today, it's a good thing!
    "awwww....shades of Janet Lynn" - Dick Button on anyone who makes more than one mistake in their program.

  19. #39

    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Living every week like it's Shark Week
    Posts
    2,177
    vCash
    4396
    Rep Power
    2061
    I've noticed moms use the cami "bras" a lot to help girls transition into real bras. Often when the time comes for a need to wear a bra, the young lady finds it uncomfortable or difficult to remember to wear it everyday. It's like early clothing pattern reinforcement.

    I don't think it's distinguishable really from an undershirt or other methods of layering kids employ. Just remember, If she cares about how it looks, she'll probably be showing her friends. Afterall, they showed her, right?
    Last edited by NinjaTurtles; 09-30-2011 at 06:36 PM.
    Sometimes I think I lost something really important to me, and it turns out I already ate it.

  20. #40
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Cali baby
    Posts
    1,846
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Tinami Amori View Post
    This situation is not about “the bra”, it’s about conformity, peer-pressure, and wanting to do/have something “because others do/have it”.
    I'm not too concerned about that. She's shown me that she can handle it. For example, Labor Day weekend, for some reason a lot of her friends got their ears pierced that weekend. They were showing them to her and telling her she should get hers pierced too. I asked her if she wanted her ears pierced and she looked at me like I was crazy. She exclaimed, "Mommy, they hurt themselves, they put holes in their ears on purpose! Why would I do that?!" To this day she's the only one without "bling" and she hasn't not uttered a peep to change it.

Page 2 of 5 FirstFirst 1234 ... LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •