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  1. #21
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    Yeah, I'm pretty sure we all thought the same thing coming in here.

  2. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by jamesy View Post
    I think a lot of people left the thread pretty disappointed.
    Looking for tips?

  3. #23

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    Yes, I was hoping to learn how to save a troubled relationship by cramming beads up my partner's ass.

  4. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by jamesy View Post
    Yes, I was hoping to learn how to save a troubled relationship by cramming beads up my partner's ass.
    Give it a try and let us know how that works out for you.
    "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."-- Albert Einstein.

  5. #25

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    Unfortunately that wasn't the type of article so I will have to wait until the next time I see Living Saint and ask her.

  6. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by jamesy View Post
    Unfortunately that wasn't the type of article so I will have to wait until the next time I see Living Saint and ask her.
    Geesh, you helpless kids today. Can't figure out anything on your own.
    "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."-- Albert Einstein.

  7. #27
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    yep, I didn't even open the thread until I got home because I thought the beads would be put to a different use.

    I wonder if the guy who gave this author the idea gets any royalties from her book?
    Q: Why can't I read the competition threads?
    A: Competition forums on the board are available to those with a Season Pass or a premium membership How to View Kiss & Cry

  8. #28
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    So the bead remains in the jar or is it take out after sex? If it's kept in the jar, how do you know that one had been recently dropped in? What happens after all 40 beads are used? What time frame are the 40 beads supposed to be used?

    And I don't get all the private jokes about "beading". Call me naive, but I'm sure I'm not the only one.

    I also think maybe it would be fun for couples who don't set time aside for sex, but I don't think it would work for couples who have a deep resentment about something in the relationship.

  9. #29

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    I went a month and a half without sex...and that was because I had just given birth. I couldn't imagine going over a week maybe 2. The idea that only men want sex...is simply not true.

    Can I also add myself to the list that totally took a perverse turn when I saw the title. So funny that this was the first thread I just HAD to look into...hehe.
    ~I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.~ (Charles R. Swindoll)

  10. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cupid View Post

    And I don't get all the private jokes about "beading". Call me naive, but I'm sure I'm not the only one.
    Google "sex beads" if you're really interested.
    To think that fun is simple fun, while earnest things are earnest, proves all too plain that neither one thou truthfully discernest.

  11. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by Anita18 View Post
    Yeah being married to a truly asexual person would be a quandary, but I don't think demanding it is gonna fix the issue.
    No, you do what a buddy of mine does, who's been living in an asexual relationship for 6 years. He just goes elsewhere to get it.

  12. #32

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    Quote Originally Posted by Karina1974 View Post
    No, you do what a buddy of mine does, who's been living in an asexual relationship for 6 years. He just goes elsewhere to get it.
    Quoted for truth. I am in my 30's and was actually shocked to know the number of people who really do go outside of their marriage for sex, while staying married and not having sex with their spouse for years.

    My husband's uncle told me once never underestimate debt keeping families together. I laughed at the time, but I really do agree with him now that I am older.
    ~I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.~ (Charles R. Swindoll)

  13. #33

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    Quote Originally Posted by Anita18 View Post
    I had...different ideas as to what the beads would be used for, given the thread title.

  14. #34

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    Quote Originally Posted by jamesy View Post
    Yes, I was hoping to learn how to save a troubled relationship by cramming beads up my partner's ass.


    You folks are in rare form today...

  15. #35

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cupid View Post
    So the bead remains in the jar or is it take out after sex? If it's kept in the jar, how do you know that one had been recently dropped in? What happens after all 40 beads are used? What time frame are the 40 beads supposed to be used?
    I was asking these questions upthread.... I guess we have to read the book to find out... not curious enough for that!
    "Marge, if you're going to get mad at me every time I do something stupid, then I guess I'm just going to have to stop doing stupid things!" - Homer Simpson in the Mr. Plow episode

  16. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cheylana View Post
    I was asking these questions upthread.... I guess we have to read the book to find out... not curious enough for that!
    I thought it was all explained quite well in the article. She gave him a jar with 40 beads in it. There was a bowl on her nightstand. When he wanted sex, he dropped one of his beads in the bowl, and she had to put out within 24 hours. If he was being a real jerk, she had the right to turn the bowl over so he couldn't put a bead in it.

    The timing was not explained, but it sounds like she just gave him back the beads and kept the whole thing going because it all worked out so well.

    Quote Originally Posted by Anita18 View Post
    Yeah being married to a truly asexual person would be a quandary, but I don't think demanding it is gonna fix the issue.
    Maybe; maybe not. If people in a sexless marriage see a therapist, they are usually put on a schedule to have sex. There's usually some kind of medication involved, too--either hormones to stimulate sex drive or treatment for depression--and couples therapy in case there are underlying resentments at fault. That's because sex is considered a critical part of a relationship. It's not good for a relationship to force sex, but it's also not good for a relationship to deny it, either. Both parties have to give a little bit.
    "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."-- Albert Einstein.

  17. #37

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    Quote Originally Posted by Prancer View Post
    I thought it was all explained quite well in the article. She gave him a jar with 40 beads in it. There was a bowl on her nightstand. When he wanted sex, he dropped one of his beads in the bowl, and she had to put out within 24 hours. If he was being a real jerk, she had the right to turn the bowl over so he couldn't put a bead in it.

    The timing was not explained, but it sounds like she just gave him back the beads and kept the whole thing going because it all worked out so well.
    Well, yes, the timing was the thing that really had me confused. She did this in order to avoid the 40 nights in a row of sex, but what's to stop him from putting a bead in the bowl every night (which in effect would have still required her to put out night after night after night)? I guess there must have been some unexplained maximum times per week/month he could put a bead in the bowl and expect her to put out.

    Well, if it works for this woman, great, but it seems so gimmicky, like something she invented so she could write a book and make beaucoup bucks off it.
    "Marge, if you're going to get mad at me every time I do something stupid, then I guess I'm just going to have to stop doing stupid things!" - Homer Simpson in the Mr. Plow episode

  18. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cheylana View Post
    Well, yes, the timing was the thing that really had me confused. She did this in order to avoid the 40 nights in a row of sex, but what's to stop him from putting a bead in the bowl every night (which in effect would have still required her to put out night after night after night)? I guess there must have been some unexplained maximum times per week/month he could put a bead in the bowl and expect her to put out.
    I would guess that nothing would stop him, except he's 40 and 40 straight days of sex is something you're more likely to do at 20. Even guys don't want it seven days a week at that point. Well, the spirit is often willing but the flesh tends to be weak after a few days. Sometimes, ya just wanna sleep.

    Quote Originally Posted by Cheylana View Post
    Well, if it works for this woman, great, but it seems so gimmicky, like something she invented so she could write a book and make beaucoup bucks off it.
    What I don't get is that the whole idea of having sex every day for X number of days has already been done and the book has already been written. The only difference is that the original author didn't use beads; she DID plan to have sex every day (although I think they ended up skipping a few times).
    "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."-- Albert Einstein.

  19. #39
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    To each their own I say, and if it helps others even better, but at the same time, I'm really glad I'm not in that marriage. The woman never wants to initiate sex, or enjoy a spontaneous encounter? The man has to make a formal request, and even there might have it turned down for bad behaviour? Not to mention that in addition to discussing her sex life with all her friends, she's now laying it out for the world to see - and he's OK with that?

    It's like a perverse battle for control - her with enforcing a formal process (and veto power), and a calendar of sex that is determined by him. Her glee at his improved behaviour when he knows he's going to get some smacks of puppy training.

    Perhaps the most telling thing in the article is that she says they have seen many therapists over the years - maybe instead of talking through beads and therapists, they should start talking to each other.

  20. #40

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    Quote Originally Posted by Prancer View Post
    What I don't get is that the whole idea of having sex every day for X number of days has already been done and the book has already been written. The only difference is that the original author didn't use beads; she DID plan to have sex every day (although I think they ended up skipping a few times).
    Agree.... of course if the average bookstore shopper is anything like the FSUers who flocked to this thread, then maybe just putting "beads" in the title of her sex book will lead to big
    "Marge, if you're going to get mad at me every time I do something stupid, then I guess I'm just going to have to stop doing stupid things!" - Homer Simpson in the Mr. Plow episode

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