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  1. #1

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    Prayers and Good Thoughts for my mom, please

    Last evening I got home from a hockey game and found three message from my sister - the one with whom my mother lives. My mom was taken by ambulance to our local hospital because she couldn't breathe in spite of using her "puffer".

    Some background info: she's 76, at least a 1/2 pack a day smoker, an alcoholic who drinks at least 3 beers per night, has arthritis in many joints in her body, has been diagnosed with OPCD (?), can't get around without the aid of her walker and tends to use it or a wheelchair the odd time she leaves the house, she's had a stroke and many TIAs (mini strokes) over the past 10-15 years.

    After spending a few hours at the hospital (I got there close to 11), they have finally settled her in ICU with a diagnosis of congested (or congestive?) heart failure. Needless to say, she gave us quite a scare. She'll be in ICU for a couple of days and then moved to another room for an unspecified time. My sister was with her when she was examined by the heart physician and he asked a couple of questions regarding how much - how shall I put this correctly - effort? should be put into keeping her alive. I guess the PC term is heroic? They asked her the questions not because they believe such will happen but they want to be prepared "just in case".
    Well, I'm not very conversant in doctor speak, and I'm not really sure exactly what is wrong or the extent of it. I don't know if this is just one episode and there will be more to come, if livestyle changes can help or if we are looking at the beginning of the end. I'm really feeling confused and wish I had some more answers. I imagine I'll get more later today but in the meantime, I would ask those who pray to please keep my mom in prayer - she's the only parent I have had since I was 14 and the only living grandparent my two children have. Good thoughts and wishes are also welcomed.

    OK, i'ts almost 3am here and I really should get some rest as I have an appointment with my physiotherapist for a slightly damaged hip flexor.
    Crazy about sports!

  2. #2

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    I am so sorry to hear this. I will be thinking of your mom, you and your entire family. Best of luck with everything and keep us updated.
    -Brian
    "Michelle would never be caught with sausage grease staining her Vera Wang." - rfisher

  3. #3

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    Deb, I am sorry you are going thru this. The questions the doctors asked are pretty routine for ICU. Some patients have signed medical wishes regarding DNR, life support or other measures. Saying a prayer for all.
    "awwww....shades of Janet Lynn" - Dick Button on anyone who makes more than one mistake in their program.

  4. #4

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    Very sorry you are going through this, you are in my prayers!

  5. #5
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    Prayers for your mother and your family.

  6. #6
    GPF Barcelona here I come
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    sorry to hear Deb.. my thoughts will be with you
    Thanks to PI .. I discovered I'm actually a Nontheist

    "Love is better than Anger, Hope is better than fear" Jack Layton 1950-2011

  7. #7

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    Praying, Deb.
    Charter member of the "We Always Believed in Ashley" Club and the "We Believe in Ricky" Club

  8. #8
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    She's "in" on the nightly candle in ND.

  9. #9
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  10. #10

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    Bless you and your mom and your sister. Praying that things go well for her and that you can all come to an agreement on what's next for her in terms of treatment, care, lifestyle changes, whatever.

  11. #11

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    (((Deb))) -- Sending good thoughts to you, your mom, and your family. Don't forget that the hospital chaplain can be a wonderful resource and comfort no matter what your faith, for both you and your mom.

  12. #12

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    Thanks all.
    Only update we've got so far is that she did suffer a minor heart attack and that they've now put her on the lower level mask for oxygen.
    Crazy about sports!

  13. #13
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    (((professordeb))) Prayers and best wishes to you.

  14. #14

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    Quote Originally Posted by professordeb View Post
    Some background info: she's 76, at least a 1/2 pack a day smoker, an alcoholic who drinks at least 3 beers per night, has arthritis in many joints in her body, has been diagnosed with OPCD (?), can't get around without the aid of her walker and tends to use it or a wheelchair the odd time she leaves the house, she's had a stroke and many TIAs (mini strokes) over the past 10-15 years.

    Well, I'm not very conversant in doctor speak, and I'm not really sure exactly what is wrong or the extent of it. I don't know if this is just one episode and there will be more to come, if livestyle changes can help or if we are looking at the beginning of the end. I'm really feeling confused and wish I had some more answers. I imagine I'll get more later today but in the meantime, I would ask those who pray to please keep my mom in prayer - she's the only parent I have had since I was 14 and the only living grandparent my two children have. Good thoughts and wishes are also welcomed.
    Been there, done this. Ok, my dad had congestive heart failure, and usually what happens they'll put her on something like lasix (sp) which will drain the fluid off. But it's kind of like once you sprain your ankle it's really easy to sprain it again. There is a chance that it'll be an ongoing kind of a thing.
    Congestive heart failure puts a lot of pressure on your kidneys and lungs, so anything that will help limit it is a good thing. ie no beer. And of course, you know the drill - no smoking. But at this stage of the game 76, I guess that's up to her.

    Feel for ya, it's not fun.

  15. #15

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    I will think good thoughts for you and your family. The discussion you had with your mom's doctor is a reminder of what we should all tell our families about our healthcare decisions.

    My mil did not have those conversations and refused to have them when I tried to get some answers from her when she was admitted to the ICU. After a semi-routine bypass surgery, she experienced complications. Leaving my husband and his half-brother with some very difficult decisions.

    Life style changes will need to happen for your mom and that maybe the most difficult thing for her and you.

  16. #16
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    (((professordeb))) sending good thoughts your way.

  17. #17

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    Prayers coming your way.

  18. #18

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    I'm sending prayers as well. I pray it all works out for her, you and your entire family.
    Give me one more quiet night, before this loud morning gets it right, and does me in.
    ~DC

  19. #19
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    Thoughts and prayers coming your way, professordeb.

    Congestive heart failure is the term you were unsure of. The other one is COPD (chronic obstructive pulmonary disease).

    I strongly recommend that everyone make their wishes known to whoever will be their "substitute decision maker" when the time comes for decisions about heroic/less than heroic measures. Regardless of our age or current state of health, we never know when such decisions will have to be made. Forearmed is definitely better than having to make determinations under the stress of the moment. I have had the experience of having to make these decisions for my late mother.
    Can't skate but love to watch

  20. #20

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    Sorry to hear about your mom. It's tough to see a parent in a serious condition. I have been there.

    She and you are in my thoughts.

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