Feel for ya! My family's not too messed up, though. My biggest thing is that one of my sisters only has one kid (to my three) and the other sister has none. Yet they and everyone else in the family seem like they are ALWAYS telling my kids what to do and criticizing their behaviors, either directly or indirectly (like by throat clearings, eye rollings, and heaving sighs) which drives me berserk. I am always on edge when we're having a full-family get-together, because I'm always afraid every little thing my kids say or do, someone's going to have a problem with it.
Maybe I'm just the one with the problem? Oh well. Fortunately not too many occasions require us all to get together for extended periods, except for the upcoming family vacation I may start another thread about.
As for you, Woodstock, I'd say spending Christmas with just your boyfriend and his family or off by yourself somewhere sounds perfect!!! Go for it!