What to play at your mother's funeral

**Jot the Dot Dot** · 10-12-2010, 08:43 AM

I know this is a sad topic, but I got to thinking about it, having heard the sad news about my Dad several years ago. Amazing Grace never ceased to bring an emotion from Mom (still alive, thank God). It was even played at Spock's funeral in The Wrath Of Khan!

**uyeahu** · 10-12-2010, 09:38 AM

My mom wanted Spirit in the Sky - Norman Greenbaum. And she got it.

**CDANN1013** · 10-12-2010, 11:08 AM

Mom told me that she wanted to hymns played at her funeral. One I can't remember to this day and the other was Hail Mary, Gentle Woman.

Carol

**ChelleC** · 10-12-2010, 12:59 PM

We've never discussed it. I know she would want hymns, possibly Amazing Grace and Old Ship of Zion.

**Spiralgraph** · 10-12-2010, 01:23 PM

When my mom passed away two years ago. I remember her saying years before that she wanted Panis Angelicus. So that was one of the hymns we selected.

**Aceon6** · 10-12-2010, 01:38 PM

My mother wanted Ave Maria. If I make it past 80, I'll want Forever Young as a reminder to the living.

**Aceon6** · 10-12-2010, 01:39 PM

Originally Posted by uyeahu

My mom wanted Spirit in the Sky - Norman Greenbaum. And she got it.

I think I would have really liked your mom.

**LilJen** · 10-12-2010, 05:50 PM

My mom doesn't want a lot of hymns and a formal service--though she herself is very religious, she fears this would turn off the rest of our (totally unreligious except for me) family. I'm like, 'don't you want a memorial service to reflect who you are?' Thoughtful, but I think there can be some balance, and no, attendees shouldn't be forced to shuffle back and forth in The Book of Common Prayer (Rite I? Rite II? Which reading? Huh?), but come on, include SOMETHING that is meaningful and dear to you!

**FigureSpins** · 10-12-2010, 06:30 PM

DH and I have handled the liturgy for our parents as well as various aunts & uncles who passed on. Two that we like in particular are "We Will Build A City of God" and "(He Will Lift You Up) On Angel's Wings."

Both very nice songs with an upbeat message of going to Heaven, and eventual resurrection.

It's incredible that kids associate strong emotions with songs played at events. When they hear certain songs at Mass, it makes the kids a little sad to remember those funerals and who we said goodbye to on those days. "Angel's Wings" sets off my oldest daughter every time she hears it, and she's almost 21.

At my uncle and my mother's funerals, they both wanted "Edelweiss" played, so we used it as the recessional. So, you don't have to use only church hymns, even at a Catholic service.

**KCC** · 10-12-2010, 06:35 PM

I have a CD of beautiful dulcimer music, with one of my favorite songs on it being "All is Well With My Soul". We gave a copy of the CD to our local funeral home after several people commented that it was very peaceful and comforting.

**genegri** · 10-12-2010, 06:43 PM

I debated between Amazing Grace and In the Arms of an Angel. In the end, I chose a folks song.

Today would have been her 70's birthday. Happy birthday, mom!

**skatemommy** · 10-12-2010, 10:33 PM

I want "I Can Only Imagine" and "Fly to Jesus (the untitled song)". I guess I should write this down somewhere.

**Kasey** · 10-12-2010, 10:35 PM

My mom wants "I believe in Love" by Don Williams.

**susan6** · 10-12-2010, 11:57 PM

My mom wanted "What a Wonderful World" by Louis Armstrong.

**KatieC** · 10-13-2010, 12:16 AM

I picked with the help of the minister for my mum -
The Strife is O're, (for someone after a long illness)
Abide With Me, (my favourite)
Silent Night (Mum died at Christmas.)
Jesus Christ is Risen Today.

Dad's was
The King of Love My Shepherd is,
Abide With Me,
For the Beauty of the Earth.

I find funerals very comforting sometimes.

**ebayj** · 10-13-2010, 06:12 AM

My mother (she died last year) wanted only the same hymn that was performed at her mother's funeral in the early 1950s - Den Store Hvitte Flok (Behold a Host, arrayed in white) - and I built outward from that to a stunning and fitting group of hymns recorded by the Oslo (Norway) DomKor.

Jot - ask her what she wants. That is the most important thing. If it is not comfortable, talk about what you want at yours. That will make it easier.

**John 3 17** · 10-13-2010, 01:57 PM

Originally Posted by skatemommy

I want "I Can Only Imagine" and "Fly to Jesus (the untitled song)". I guess I should write this down somewhere.

I love both of those. "Fly" is so precious.

-Bridget

**Gypsy** · 10-13-2010, 01:59 PM

A woman I work with (and I am not kidding) has actually put it in writing and had it notarized so that her daughter goes thru with it.

She wants "Ding Dong the Witch is Dead" played at her funeral!!

**PDilemma** · 10-13-2010, 03:05 PM

Originally Posted by Gypsy

A woman I work with (and I am not kidding) has actually put it in writing and had it notarized so that her daughter goes thru with it.

She wants "Ding Dong the Witch is Dead" played at her funeral!!

I can think of a few people that should have that played at their funerals, and it would be if I were allowed to choose. But why would someone choose it herself? Humor or true self-awareness???

**professordeb** · 10-13-2010, 03:30 PM

Count me in as another who wants I Can Only Imagine. I also want East to West by Casting Crowns. I asked son (who has a lovely singing voice - a gift he refuses to use) if he would sing them for me but his response "mom, I don't think I could sing on that day". Then there's the old hymn It Is Well With My Soul. If I have Amazing Grace, I'd like to sung to the tune of either The Lion Sleeps Tonight or House of the Rising Sun. I've heard it done by the College & Career group I belonged to back when I was in my 20's (which was about 30 years ago) and I simply loved the way it sounded. I realize this may sound kind of wierd but I've had a warped sense of humour for years so why not celebrate it at my funeral - since this is supposed to be a celebration of my life.

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