Results 1 to 12 of 12
  1. #1
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Where banjos play.
    Age
    35
    Posts
    8,070
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0

    CNN Opinion Article: Is Infidelity Natural?

    http://www.cnn.com/2010/OPINION/09/0...ex.html?hpt=C2

    This article cracked me up...thought I'd share.

  2. #2
    KWEEN 2016! YES WE KWAN!
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    vimeo.com/98880255
    Posts
    13,383
    vCash
    933000
    Rep Power
    84463
    What appropriate discussion fodder for the Hot Tub thread.

  3. #3
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    467
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    I never understand these issues. I was born without the jealousy gene. I don't give a damn what my men do when they aren't with me.

  4. #4
    Argle-Bargle-ist
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Location
    Vancouver, BC
    Age
    50
    Posts
    8,564
    vCash
    875
    Rep Power
    76283
    Interesting that this thread has come up, because I was thinking of doing a poll asking people if they would be more upset if their partner...

    a. shared their dreams, hopes and goals with someone other than them, or
    b. had sex outside of the relationship

    I think the vast majority of people would choose option B, but I would find A much more upsetting. Boinking some stranger on vacation is not as bad to me as emotional openness and intimacy that was not shared with me. Curious as to what others thoughts are.

    The wording of the article's title is strange to me. Why "is infidelity natural" instead of "is monogomy natural"?

    I don't expect to give a partner everything he wants as far as friendship, someone to talk to/with, travel partner, someone to have fun and laugh with, someone to share common interests with... Why is sex the only thing society says, "ONLY WITH ME!!!!"? A mate can go outside the relationship for all of their needs except sex. I think this is strange/confusing.
    It's official. I am madly in love with Meryl Davis.

  5. #5
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Where banjos play.
    Age
    35
    Posts
    8,070
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    My ex-boyfriend actually told me he talked to this one girl online(see the "halp relationship" thread I made for further details) because he could tell her anything and they had confided in one another more than anyone else and he had told her things he wouldn't tell anyone else. Considering he'd never met her, and he was dating me, yeah that hurt as bad as cheating to me.

    I have no problem with people who want open relationships...it's just not for me personally.

  6. #6
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Rejecting your reality and substituting my own
    Age
    30
    Posts
    11,004
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Aimless View Post
    I never understand these issues. I was born without the jealousy gene. I don't give a damn what my men do when they aren't with me.
    I think it also depends on the person you're with. I was an unsufferable jealous beeeyotch with my first bf, but he had low self-esteem and would try to attract the attentions of other women just to make himself feel better. Also, I was immature then.

    With my current bf, he's much more self-assured and he worked me into a relationship so patiently over half a year, if he did manage to cheat on me, I'd actually be impressed instead of angry.

  7. #7
    Duck Hunter
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Posts
    7,062
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Satellitegirl View Post
    My ex-boyfriend actually told me he talked to this one girl online(see the "halp relationship" thread I made for further details) because he could tell her anything and they had confided in one another more than anyone else and he had told her things he wouldn't tell anyone else. Considering he'd never met her, and he was dating me, yeah that hurt as bad as cheating to me.

    I have no problem with people who want open relationships...it's just not for me personally.
    I'm with you on this one.. if I didn't feel comfortable talking to my fiance (that sounds so weird lol) about anything I wouldn't be with him. Doesn't mean I won't talk to someone else about those things too.. but if it gets to the point where I'm talking to that other person and only that other person about the important things then there's definitely an issue.

  8. #8

    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    North Dakota
    Age
    33
    Posts
    3,126
    vCash
    480
    Rep Power
    35
    Quote Originally Posted by PeterG View Post
    Interesting that this thread has come up, because I was thinking of doing a poll asking people if they would be more upset if their partner...

    a. shared their dreams, hopes and goals with someone other than them, or
    b. had sex outside of the relationship
    Call me picky, but if either A or B happened, I don't want to be in the relationship. B is definitely a deal-breaker because I do not share my men willingly, and A is close behind. Sure, Mr. nerdycool can stay true to me physically, but if A happens, all it tells me is that I'm good in the sack and that's all. Basically making me feel dumb, slutty and not worthy of him. And I don't need that.

  9. #9

    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Posts
    9,269
    vCash
    567
    Rep Power
    3372
    Quote Originally Posted by PeterG View Post
    Interesting that this thread has come up, because I was thinking of doing a poll asking people if they would be more upset if their partner...

    a. shared their dreams, hopes and goals with someone other than them, or
    b. had sex outside of the relationship
    I would actually consider both to be cheating. It's just a different way of cheating. Option A depends on how deeply involved you are in the relationship though. If I just met someone I would expect option a to exist automatically. We wouldn't be close enough for me to expect that kind of intimacy.
    "Half the harm that is done in this world is due to people who want to feel important. They don't mean to do harm -- but the harm does not interest them. Or they do not see it, or they justify it because they are absorbed in the endless struggle to think well of themselves." – T.S. Eliot

  10. #10

    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Location
    living in Crazytown
    Posts
    2,669
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    5392
    Quote Originally Posted by Satellitegirl View Post
    http://www.cnn.com/2010/OPINION/09/0...ex.html?hpt=C2

    This article cracked me up...thought I'd share.



    Thanks for posting that. TOO funny...
    I'm not spoiled...I deserve all my stuff.

  11. #11
    Spin Alissa Spin!!!
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    Pennsylvania, USA
    Age
    52
    Posts
    3,657
    vCash
    565
    Rep Power
    9248
    If there was no such thing as a monogomous long-term relationship....I'd rather stay single my whole life.

    I don't think infidelity is "natural"....I think it's chosen. Heck, there are even some animals that mate for life. And won't mate with another if that mate dies. I'd say monogamy is more natural than infidelity.

  12. #12
    ...Her?
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    forcing Brooke Castile into ice dance
    Posts
    2,756
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by mpal2 View Post
    I would actually consider both to be cheating. It's just a different way of cheating. Option A depends on how deeply involved you are in the relationship though. If I just met someone I would expect option a to exist automatically. We wouldn't be close enough for me to expect that kind of intimacy.
    I definitely think they're both cheating, Option A is an emotional affair, Option B is a physical affair. Option A is worse to me. And I've seen Option A lead to Option B quite a number of times.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •