Page 3 of 4 FirstFirst 1234 LastLast
Results 41 to 60 of 80
  1. #41

    Join Date
    Jul 2002
    Location
    Singleville aka 7th Circle of Hell
    Age
    34
    Posts
    12,385
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    11679
    I'll concur that BR is pretty quiet in RL, but I think that's more from being all agog at whatever Tanith Belbin was not wearing than any kind of introvertedness.

    And she talked to me! Of course, it could also be that I am one of the few extroverted people on this board and could talk the bricks off the walls if I had

    RockTheTassel--those traits definitely describe my younger brother and me, only in reverse.

    It's interesting--I can be defined as both an oldest, middle, and only child. My older brother and sister are 18 and 16 years older than me respectively, and my younger brother is six years younger. I've read that if there is more than five years difference between siblings, the conventional wisdom regarding oldest/youngest "resets." Personally, I like the age difference. My younger brother and I are much closer than we are to the older ones, and despite the closeness in age, closer to each other than the older ones are for each other. If you're going to have multiple children, five years is a good spread. The oldest one gets plenty of parent time/attention on his own before going off to kindergarten, and again, just personal experience, there's less jealousy. Also, you're not at school at the same time except elementary school, and possibly college (grad school where my brother was an undergrad).
    "The practice of sport is a human right. Every individual must have the possibility of practicing sport, without discrimination of any kind and in the Olympic spirit, which requires mutual understanding with a spirit of friendship, solidarity and fair play." –Olympic Charter

  2. #42
    Bountifully Enmeshed
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    At the Christmas Bizarre
    Posts
    38,168
    vCash
    250
    Rep Power
    46915
    Quote Originally Posted by Matryeshka View Post
    If you're going to have multiple children, five years is a good spread.
    It might be good for the kids, but I think most parents would be less thrilled at the prospect .

    It's interesting to me that so many onlies say they were never lonely because they read a lot. I did and do that, too, but I'm not convinced that being entertained or engaged is the same thing as not being lonely.
    "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."-- Albert Einstein.

  3. #43
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Rejecting your reality and substituting my own
    Age
    30
    Posts
    11,005
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Matryeshka View Post
    I'll concur that BR is pretty quiet in RL, but I think that's more from being all agog at whatever Tanith Belbin was not wearing than any kind of introvertedness.

    And she talked to me! Of course, it could also be that I am one of the few extroverted people on this board and could talk the bricks off the walls if I had
    Well, did she talk to you or did you talk to her? Tanith talked to me once but that's cause when she got on the shuttle back to the hotel, the only empty seat left was next to mine. And the gridlock was terrible and she really wanted to get back and suggested she could get off and make a run for it. I looked down at the drivers next to us and said that would probably be a bad idea, since everybody was texting.

  4. #44
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Sochi voids
    Age
    25
    Posts
    2,137
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    I got the best of both worlds. My brother was 12 when I was born and my sister was 9. My brother was a senior in high school when I was in kindergarten and my sister graduated a year early when I was 8, so I spent most of my school-aged years essentially an only child. I don't think I'm as close to them had they been nearer to me in age, but we rarely fought because they were so much older than me.

  5. #45

    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Posts
    10,060
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    211
    Quote Originally Posted by Prancer View Post
    It's interesting to me that so many onlies say they were never lonely because they read a lot. I did and do that, too, but I'm not convinced that being entertained or engaged is the same thing as not being lonely.
    Reminds me of when I respond to questions about where I grew up. We moved about every 4 years from state to state until I was 18. Most react with "oh, that must have been HORRIBLE!". Not really. I can't imagine, for example, having divorced parents. At least the nuclear family remained intact as my father accepted a better job than the last one. The pros of that upbringing included not getting homesick when I went to college. It was just another move to me . But I probably don't value friendship as much as most. I purposely reduced the number of friends I had just before a move so I wouldn't need to say goodbye to as many people, especially in junior high and high school.

    And maybe being an only child isn't as lonely as decades ago, with the Internet and all that. I recall reading a couple of very successful entertainers who led desperately lonely childhoods (Frank Sinatra, Robin Williams), but the personal pain was translated into creative thinking as a result of so much free time in their youth.

    What about China and their one-child policy? I'm sure those children have been studied. A nation with very few aunts and uncles.
    Last edited by deltask8er; 08-18-2010 at 02:29 AM.

  6. #46

    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    FSU Witness Protection Program
    Age
    26
    Posts
    28,065
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    35661
    My brother and I are 15 months apart(), and we've always gotten along really well. We fought, obviously, but never too bad. We played together all the time as little kids, and planned stuff out together when we were older. My sister is 4 years younger, and as kids we fought all the time. I don't think I really liked her until she hit age 10 or so, and I didn't enjoy her until she was about 13. We get along well now, though, and I am closer to my sister than I am to my brother.
    Adelina Sotnikova is the 2014 Olympic champion!

  7. #47
    Port de bras!!!
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Location
    Ravenclaw
    Posts
    30,139
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    34921
    Quote Originally Posted by Prancer View Post

    It's interesting to me that so many onlies say they were never lonely because they read a lot. I did and do that, too, but I'm not convinced that being entertained or engaged is the same thing as not being lonely.
    Alright. When my parents asked me (and this happened many times) if I wanted a brother or a sister, I consistently replied with an emphatic "No!" I may have tried to negotiate for a cat instead a few times.

    I don't ever remember feeling that I wished there was a sibling with whom to play or feeling deprived in any way. I was thrilled when I got a change to play with my cousins who were only one year younger than me but I never as a child wished for a sibling.

    The first time I felt extremely lonely was when I was stuck on the East Coast years ago over Thanksgiving while my family was on the West Coast. From then on I always have Thanksgiving dinner at my house.

    Another time (this was when I was already married and Mini Ice was very little) hubby took Mini Ice to see his folks on the East Coast. I couldn't come because of grad school. But when the weekend rolled around and their absence became too much that I used my points to hop on a plane to follow them.

    Neither of these episodes of acute loneliness involve having or not having a sibling.
    Last edited by IceAlisa; 08-18-2010 at 02:40 AM.
    "Nature is a damp, inconvenient sort of place where birds and animals wander about uncooked."

    from Speedy Death

  8. #48

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Where the wind blows
    Posts
    9,681
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    5033
    Quote Originally Posted by Prancer View Post
    It might be good for the kids, but I think most parents would be less thrilled at the prospect .

    It's interesting to me that so many onlies say they were never lonely because they read a lot. I did and do that, too, but I'm not convinced that being entertained or engaged is the same thing as not being lonely.
    I also lived where I could ride my own horse any time, had a lot of pets, and had peer interaction on an hour's bus ride each way to school It depends on where you lived I guess.

  9. #49
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Looking for cupcakes
    Posts
    30,765
    vCash
    5550
    Rep Power
    0
    Spouse is an only child of sorts. He had a half-brother who lived with his dad. He had a step sister who lived with his dad and stepmom. So he was an only child with siblings

    My extended family is quite large. I have 23 first cousins on my mom's side and she has 6 siblings - at the largest when everyone was married and some had kids, there would be Christmas dinners with ~50 people. That overwhelmed him big time. On my dad's side, I have 7 first cousins, but he is estranged (sp) from one sister and her kids.

    Quote Originally Posted by oleada View Post
    My brother and I are 15 months apart(), and we've always gotten along really well. We fought, obviously, but never too bad. We played together all the time as little kids, and planned stuff out together when we were older. My sister is 4 years younger, and as kids we fought all the time. I don't think I really liked her until she hit age 10 or so, and I didn't enjoy her until she was about 13. We get along well now, though, and I am closer to my sister than I am to my brother.
    My brother and I are 15 months apart too. My other brother is 4 years younger and my sister is 7 years younger. I don't think I would say that I was particularly close to any of them. My younger brother and I really didn't even like each other. Even today, we are civil, but not much more.

    I grew up taking care of the siblings and being the responsible one. Maybe I would have liked being an only child?

  10. #50

    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    3,174
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    4024
    Due to circumstances during and following his birth, my son is my only. He's never asked for a sibling, he has plenty of friends and I do not think he has suffered from being an only child. My only regret is that when he is grown, if something happens to me or my husband, my son will have to deal with it on his own and not have a sibling to share the responsibility and expense of caring for an aged or dependent parent. Hopefully if he choses to marry, his partner will be helpful and understanding.

  11. #51

    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Location
    Vancouver Canada
    Age
    55
    Posts
    12,720
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    11600
    Quote Originally Posted by deltask8er View Post
    And I assume that most people who spend a lot of time online recreationally are introverts. They can express themselves much better by typing out their thoughts, allowing some time to process their thoughts, than in real-life conversations. I would also assume that this type of communication would feel torturous to an extrovert, on the other hand.
    I'm not quite sure that's true. We should do a poll.

    I'm an introvert but have had certainly more extroverted periods. The Internet - and this forum in particular - and the fact that I work alone at home have led me to favour an introverted lifestyle.

  12. #52
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Location
    Lapsed skating fan
    Posts
    14,713
    vCash
    550
    Rep Power
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Prancer View Post
    It's interesting to me that so many onlies say they were never lonely because they read a lot. I did and do that, too, but I'm not convinced that being entertained or engaged is the same thing as not being lonely.
    I agree. I read a ton as a kid and do now as well, but as a child, it was often as a substitute for someone to talk to, especially when I was old enough to stay at home while my parents worked.

  13. #53

    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Location
    living in Crazytown
    Posts
    2,676
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    5392
    Quote Originally Posted by Prancer View Post
    It's interesting to me that so many onlies say they were never lonely because they read a lot. I did and do that, too, but I'm not convinced that being entertained or engaged is the same thing as not being lonely.
    Where we lived there was always a house or two nearby with girls living there the same age as me so I always had friends to play with. We would go back and forth between houses all day long.

    Also, my mom's younger sister lived with us when I was between the ages of 4 - 10. She is 11 years younger than my mom (and coincidentally 11 years older than me.) In some ways, she was like a 3rd parent and in other ways, more like a much older sibling.

    My parents enrolled me in social activities a couple of times a week as well, plus the time I was in school I was surrounded by friends....so I really didn't feel lonely at all.

    I recognize that others did feel lonely as an only. But for me, it wasn't an issue.
    I'm not spoiled...I deserve all my stuff.

  14. #54
    ((Swedish skating dudes))
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Posts
    2,440
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    1090
    Quote Originally Posted by Matryeshka View Post
    I've read that if there is more than five years difference between siblings, the conventional wisdom regarding oldest/youngest "resets." Personally, I like the age difference. My younger brother and I are much closer than we are to the older ones, and despite the closeness in age, closer to each other than the older ones are for each other. If you're going to have multiple children, five years is a good spread. The oldest one gets plenty of parent time/attention on his own before going off to kindergarten, and again, just personal experience, there's less jealousy. Also, you're not at school at the same time except elementary school, and possibly college (grad school where my brother was an undergrad).
    My sister is 6 years older than me, and my parents planned it this way, because my dad'd constantly fight with his sister (3 years older than him), but got along fine with his older brothers (6+ years between them). My sister and I didn't really have much interaction until I was in my teens, but have been close ever since.

  15. #55
    AYS's snark-sponge
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    in the Bobrova & Soloviev Fan Clubhouse
    Posts
    41,911
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    30529
    My sister and I are 11 months apart. In my experience, this has been excellent.
    Congratulations 2014 World Ice Dance Champions Anna Cappellini & Luca Lanotte!!!

  16. #56
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Posts
    23,863
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    0
    OT, but I've never understood how babies can be born so close together. I guess you would have to not nurse. Or maybe the second is premature. But two full-term babies? How does a woman's body recover that quickly to conceive again?

  17. #57
    AYS's snark-sponge
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    in the Bobrova & Soloviev Fan Clubhouse
    Posts
    41,911
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    30529
    Quote Originally Posted by agalisgv View Post
    OT, but I've never understood how babies can be born so close together. I guess you would have to not nurse. Or maybe the second is premature. But two full-term babies? How does a woman's body recover that quickly to conceive again?
    I don't know, but my mother and her sister were 11 months apart too.

    Now my sister was born premature, but I don't know what effect that had, mostly because I'm sort of clueless about this stuff. Maybe I'll ask my mother.
    Congratulations 2014 World Ice Dance Champions Anna Cappellini & Luca Lanotte!!!

  18. #58
    Prick Admin
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Location
    Having a kiki
    Posts
    42,416
    vCash
    506
    Rep Power
    26080
    Quote Originally Posted by floskate View Post
    I'm an only child and can't say I've ever been at a disadvantage socially. Like you IceAlisa I was reading very early and that is still one of my favourite pastimes. My Mum was always a big reader and trying to get her attention while she was stuck in a good book was a lost cause so I guess I thought if you can't beat 'em..... I don't ever remember being lonely and even today, I enjoy my own company as and when the occasion arises. My partner on the other hand, who is from a large family of siblings, hates being alone.
    That's the exact opposite of Mr. allezfred and me. I'm the third of four and Mr. allezfred is an only child. I'm happy enough doing things on my own whereas he is not.
    To think that fun is simple fun, while earnest things are earnest, proves all too plain that neither one thou truthfully discernest.

  19. #59

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Where the wind blows
    Posts
    9,681
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    5033
    Quote Originally Posted by agalisgv View Post
    OT, but I've never understood how babies can be born so close together. I guess you would have to not nurse. Or maybe the second is premature. But two full-term babies? How does a woman's body recover that quickly to conceive again?
    My husbands siblings are all a year or so apart, except for the last who is 12 years younger.

    1st one - 1 year and 1/2 older
    2nd - 11 months older
    my husband
    4th - exactly one year younger
    5th - 13 months younger


    My mil was a busy woman.

  20. #60

    Join Date
    Feb 2002
    Location
    Planning? No, no. Let's keep it suicidal.
    Posts
    5,016
    vCash
    500
    Rep Power
    34851
    I'm an only child and for the most part didn't have too much trouble making friends and adjusting to things like living with roommates.

    The one time I did wish I had a brother or sister to talk to was when my family moved to the US and I didn't really know anyone at my high school, nor did I speak enough English slang to be able to fit in as quickly as I would have liked. I think in the end you learn for those types of experiences, too.

Page 3 of 4 FirstFirst 1234 LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •