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  1. #1
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    Chris Bowman in the Courts

    Hadn't seen this posted anywhere here:

    http://detnews.com/article/20100530/...310/1409/rss36

    So sad.
    In my spare time, I like to interview figure skating legends.

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    Freeman, who is married and still lives with her husband, said Bowman had lived in Lake Orion with her and her husband and two daughters for the last six years of his life. She said she met Bowman at the Detroit Skating Club, where he coached her daughter.

    "We became friends, then intimate friends and also business partners," she said, adding her marriage was "one of convenience."
    Nice. I'm sure her daughter appreciates knowing she was just a byproduct of convenience.
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    Quote Originally Posted by genevieve View Post
    Nice. I'm sure her daughter appreciates knowing she was just a byproduct of convenience.
    Those types of marriages tend to work out better than those done for "love", to be perfectly honest.

    I'm sure a kid would rather see a marriage that works, for whatever reason, than emotional or physical abuse between two adults, which happens in many marriages. There's nothing wrong with marrying out of convenience. Most people do this, whether they realize it or not. You can love someone all you want, if you don't want the same things out of life, it won't work.

    No reason to be so judgmental. Marrying for reason is better than marrying for emotions in the grand scheme of things. Emotions aren't tangible, and non-tangible things shouldn't be used for life planning.

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by tangerine_dream View Post
    Those types of marriages tend to work out better than those done for "love", to be perfectly honest.

    I'm sure a kid would rather see a marriage that works, for whatever reason, than emotional or physical abuse between two adults, which happens in many marriages. There's nothing wrong with marrying out of convenience. Most people do this, whether they realize it or not. You can love someone all you want, if you don't want the same things out of life, it won't work.

    No reason to be so judgmental. Marrying for reason is better than marrying for emotions in the grand scheme of things. Emotions aren't tangible, and non-tangible things shouldn't be used for life planning.
    ...Marry me?

    (IOW, ITA.)

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by tangerine_dream View Post
    No reason to be so judgmental. Marrying for reason is better than marrying for emotions in the grand scheme of things. Emotions aren't tangible, and non-tangible things shouldn't be used for life planning.
    I'm not judging her marriage. I am familiar with marriage for reasons other than love. I'm judging the tackiness of being so public about her business arrangement marriage, which I think will probably have some negative results for their daughter.
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    Quote Originally Posted by tangerine_dream View Post
    Those types of marriages tend to work out better than those done for "love", to be perfectly honest.
    And you are basing your perfect honesty on what?

    Quote Originally Posted by tangerine_dream View Post
    I'm sure a kid would rather see a marriage that works, for whatever reason, than emotional or physical abuse between two adults, which happens in many marriages
    And they don't happen in marriages of convenience? And people don't change their goals or priorities if they marry for convenience rather than love? And people don't end up having the same problems that show up in any marriage if they marry for convenience? And you can so easily separate emotional reasons from reasons of convenience?

    If only things were so simple.

    Quote Originally Posted by tangerine_dream View Post
    No reason to be so judgmental.
    Followed by:

    Quote Originally Posted by tangerine_dream View Post
    Marrying for reason is better than marrying for emotions in the grand scheme of things. Emotions aren't tangible, and non-tangible things shouldn't be used for life planning.
    Oh, the irony.

    Quote Originally Posted by genevieve View Post
    I'm not judging her marriage. I am familiar with marriage for reasons other than love. I'm judging the tackiness of being so public about her business arrangement marriage, which I think will probably have some negative results for their daughter.
    And there must have been something there besides business at some point.
    "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."-- Albert Einstein.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by manleywoman View Post
    So sad.
    Truly. He could have had it all, but he just couldn't conquer his demons.
    "I miss footwork that has any kind of a discernible pattern. The goal of a step sequence should not be for a skater to show the same ice coverage as a Zamboni and take about as much time as an ice resurface. " ~ Zemgirl, reflecting on a pre-IJS straight line sequence

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    Most marriages in the world are arranged ones and the success rate of them is significantly higher than those which are not.

    How absurd that his family thinks she would steal his body. She would need a court order to have him exhumed and those are not easy to get. $$$$$$$$. Love of money is the root of all evil. His ending was sad enough without being made more so by this. I do hope the autobiography is published or made into a film, assuming it is authentic.
    Let's see who could play Chris and who Frank?

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    How tacky on the website's part that this story comes up alongside a banner ad for "be a pharmacist"

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    Quote Originally Posted by Iceman View Post
    Most marriages in the world are arranged ones and the success rate of them is significantly higher than those which are not.
    A marriage of convenience is not an arranged marriage. Not sure what the correlation is supposed to be, but I suppose they are free of emotional and physical abuse, too. That's how you know they are successful!

    Does any of this matter? No matter how you look at the relationships involved, it's a terrible thing that this is going to play out in the newspapers.

    Quote Originally Posted by overedge View Post
    How tacky on the website's part that this story comes up alongside a banner ad for "be a pharmacist"
    I doubt if the website has any more to do with the ads that come up on their website than we do for what shows up in the ads here. They're triggered by words on the site, no more and no less. There's one for diet aids at the top of this page right now, and I'm sure that was triggered by the story as well.
    "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."-- Albert Einstein.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Prancer View Post
    I doubt if the website has any more to do with the ads that come up on their website than we do for what shows up in the ads here. They're triggered by words on the site, no more and no less. There's one for diet aids at the top of this page right now, and I'm sure that was triggered by the story as well.
    Most newspaper websites are careful to put some controls on their ads so inappropriate ads don't show up with the content of stories. I know that ads are generated by keywords in the text, but it is possible to put limiters on the ads so, for example, the site doesn't get an ad for a gun shop showing up next to a story about a shooting death.

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    [QUOTE=Prancer;2776050]A marriage of convenience is not an arranged marriage. Not sure what the correlation is supposed to be, but I suppose they are free of emotional and physical abuse, too. That's how you know they are successful!

    Not all, but some arranged marriages are marriages of convenience. The Van Snooties want their off spring to marry a Van Snob to significantly increase social and/or financial clout and/or political influence.

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    JMO but I think this Freeman person is kinda shady. I think she's a opportunist who thinks she's going to make money off his book draft. His family - parents and daughter are the one's who should profit from any book or movie deals. Was he estranged from them? I didn't really get that from the article. The body snatching thing is a little over the top. Also if he was so happy with the Freemans why did he "slip up" after three years? I don't care what her marriage is like she seems skeevy.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Iceman View Post
    Not all, but some arranged marriages are marriages of convenience. The Van Snooties want their off spring to marry a Van Snob to significantly increase social and/or financial clout and/or political influence.
    Again, I have no idea why such a thing is relevant, but if we are talking about parents making arrangements for offspring, we are talking about an arranged marriage--provided, of course, the Van Snooties get their way. Arranged marriages are usually arranged for the purpose of increasing or maintaining wealth and property, maintaining tradition, etc., etc. If you are equating success with the lower divorce rate, then you must also consider that the social pressure against divorce in countries in which arranged marriages are a tradition is very high.

    A marriage of convenience is one in which two parties agree to marry because there are advantages for the two of them. Typical examples of this would be marriage for citizenship, marriage for insurance, "lavender" marriages, etc. I would be very surprised if such marriages lasted beyond both parties reaching the end of whatever it was they found convenient about the relationship, but I don't know that there is any way of knowing about such things, as I don't think anyone keeps records on marriages of convenience. That's why I asked tangerine_dream what she was basing her claims on. I've known of a few people who have made them and none of them were married more than five years--but that's strictly anecdotal.

    I think this Canadian Immigration issue illustrates the difference quite well: http://www.cbc.ca/canada/toronto/sto...marriages.html

    What I think this woman has is a marriage in which a married couple decided to not divorce because it was more convenient to stay legally married. It just seems unlikely that a marriage of convenience would produce two children, but I'm not a party to their agreement.

    And for the record, neither of those two children belonged to Christopher Bowman; he fathered his daughter with his former wife, not April Freeman.

    Quote Originally Posted by REO View Post
    Also if he was so happy with the Freemans why did he "slip up" after three years?
    Oh, dear, if you are going to blame other people for his behavior, you could say the same thing about his parents, as he was an adolescent when he started using drugs, and his former wife, as he used drugs when he was married, too.

    Most habitual drug users and addicts use drugs no matter what else happens; it's only a few who ever stop. You can't love somebody out of an addiction.
    "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."-- Albert Einstein.

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    At times I think my marriage is one of convenience, other times out of love, but always with friendship as the continued undercurrent.

    IMHO, the ones that really last and are successful have those three things.

    I do feel bad that this is media fodder for the daughter though.
    ~I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.~ (Charles R. Swindoll)

  16. #16
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    IME, a "marriage of convenience" in this context is "I sleep with whomever I want and my spouse doesn't complain too badly for whatever reason."
    Actual bumper sticker series: Jesus is my co-pilot. Satan is my financial advisor. Budha is my therapist. L. Ron Hubbard owes me $50.

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    I didn't mean that they were the ones who made him slip up, just that if things were going along so swimmingly with his relationship with her he'd be less likely to after three years of sobriety. Stress can make addicts fall off the wagon. And then again perhaps that wasn't completely true either. Who knows.

    MacMadame I agree. I think open marriage is more to the point than convenience.

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    Quote Originally Posted by REO View Post
    I didn't mean that they were the ones who made him slip up, just that if things were going along so swimmingly with his relationship with her he'd be less likely to after three years of sobriety. Stress can make addicts fall off the wagon.
    So can happiness, perverse as that may be. Addicts often crave excitement; contentment is too boring for them. And for many of them, having someone in their corner is just another excuse to slip.
    "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."-- Albert Einstein.

  19. #19
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    The whole thing is incredibly sad. Too bad those people can't just let him RIP for goodness sake. No wonder he was an addict.

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    Bowmans's final amateur performance at 1992 Worlds:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sHBCT...eature=related

    I have to wonder if he is on cocaine here. The drama queen reaction to a fall, and really the entirety of his program. This is not a sober individual. Never could get a guestimate of his pupils, the camera didn't give us a good shot.

    I'd be interested to read his memoir.

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