Wedding/showers..advice, ettiquette, and general bitching!

Discussion in 'Off The Beaten Track' started by Smiley0884, Mar 18, 2013.

  1. cruisin

    cruisin Well-Known Member

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    Not that guests need to know they are drinking from Waterford crystal, but there is an etched Waterford mark on all of their crystal. No need for the sticker :lol:.

    I no longer lile my fine china choice. but, I do use it for holidays and dinners with guests. So, I'm glad I have it. Just wish I knew in my 20's what I would like when I was older :D.
  2. DAngel

    DAngel Active Member

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    My knowledge about crystals is very limited and I'm only familiar with Swarovski crystals... Are Waterford crystals better than Swarovski crystals?
  3. Anita18

    Anita18 Well-Known Member

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    I've definitely heard of Waterford for formal hosting use, but not Swarovski. I associate Swarovski as the stuff they use for jewelry when they can't afford diamonds. :shuffle:
  4. maatTheViking

    maatTheViking Well-Known Member

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    AFAIK, man made crystal is any glass enhanced with lead for greater clarity and shine and hardness, I think. They probably don't use lead anymore though.

    You can also cut crystal like a diamond. Swarovski cuts crystals to animals and jewelry, Waterford make stemware, plates and stuff, which is cut too, to add sparkle. Images of Waterford.

    you can also have crystal glasses that are not cut, they usually can be made thinner and have a better shine and sound. We have some Riedel wine glasses, which is simple in the design, but are crystal (no dishwasher). I personally don't like Waterford, as I find it too opulent, but tastes are different. I wouldn't mind a Waterford cake stand, though :p.
  5. madm

    madm Active Member

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    Of course people return gifts to the store where they were purchased (with a gift receipt). I returned many of the gifts my mother's friends gave us to the Geary's store where I was registered, and I used the credit from those gifts to fill in the missing place settings for my china. By buying 8 place settings, I also got all of the serving pieces (vegetable bowls, meat platter, salt and pepper, creamer) for free. It was a Lenox promotion. I was also able to purchase more of my Waterford crystal water and wine glasses. Even though I use my china and crystal only a couple of times per year for holiday dinners, I enjoy having them on display in a breakfront china cabinet in my dining room.
  6. Jenny

    Jenny From the Bloc

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    I think part of the idea of china or crystal as a wedding gift is that it's exactly what a young couple on a budget would not buy for themselves, but would eventually need when they hosted family dinners and had ladies in for bridge and tea. My MIL told me that when she got married in the 50s, her mother insisted she pick a pattern so that she had something for when she hosted her husband's boss for dinner :)

    Plus in theory unlike a toaster that you have to replace eventually, china and crystal should last for life, and be passed down to daughters and granddaughters.

    A bit outdated now of course, but some people still enjoy pretty things, and tradition, and quality, and the things that last.
  7. Skittl1321

    Skittl1321 Well-Known Member

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    Do people still do this? When we have people (not ladies, mixed sex) over for game night, we usually have beer or margaritas...
  8. Jenny

    Jenny From the Bloc

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    I was speaking of the past.
  9. Skittl1321

    Skittl1321 Well-Known Member

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    Sorry, reading comprhension fail on my part.
  10. cruisin

    cruisin Well-Known Member

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    maatTheViking answered that for you. Waterford also makes chandeliers and lamp bases. They mostly make glasses, candy dishes, serving plates, bowls, salt & pepper shakers, decanters, and some decorative art pieces. Swarovski makes crystals for decorating garments, handbags, eyeglasses - flat back and hot fix, crystals for jewelry, and decorative pieces. Waterford is almost always clear crystal, though they have a lesser priced line called Marquise that has some colored pieces. Swarovski is known for brilliant color, as well as clear crystal. Waterford started in Ireland and was considered the best stem wear crystal. Though most of it is now made in Slovenia, Czech Republic, and Germany. Swarovski is made in Austria.

    That piqued my interest, and I did a Google search. It seems that they do still use lead. For non-serving pieces, it's harmless. For drinking glasses, it's benign. However, never store liquids in lead crystal decanters. You can serve it in a decanter, but pour it out immediately after. Liquid that is in the crystal for an extended period of time is where the lead becomes an issue. I would also not keep perfume in a lead crystal perfume atomizer.
  11. milanessa

    milanessa engaged to dupa

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    It was? I always thought Baccarat and Lalique were better. Maybe it's just the cutting - Waterford tends toward "heavy" patterns.
  12. skatesindreams

    skatesindreams Well-Known Member

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    Different makers/artisans have different styles of blowing/cutting crystal.
    One manufacturer isn't necessarily "better" than another.
    It's a matter of personal preference.

    Waterford now has several more contemporary lines, in addition to their traditional patterns.
  13. cruisin

    cruisin Well-Known Member

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    I always forget that Baccarat and Lalique make stemware. I always think of them more as art pieces.

    I have Waterford water and wine for 8, and 6 flutes. Wish I had the full 12, but they don't make my pattern anymore, it's called Kildare. I have 6 Lismore brandies. There is something lovely about the weight and the way the warmth from your hand warms the brandy in heavy crystal.
    Last edited: Mar 27, 2013
  14. taf2002

    taf2002 Well-Known Member

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    I do that too.

    BTW I try to buy what the couple would like - before registries people would ask the parents/families what the couple wanted. If they weren't picking out chrystal, silver flatware, or china then I wouldn't buy them Waterford. In my younger days nearly everyone would actually use their nice things. My mother served every Sunday dinner & all holiday meals on fine china & silver flatware - with 6 kids yet! My mother believed that you don't "save the nice for company", she thought her family was pretty special.

    I would love it if it came in silver instead of gold. I gave my sisters some Lenox serving pieces for Christmas this year - I guess we're all living in the past.

    BTW, I still have ladies in to play bridge (but not tea) and I use my nice serving pieces.
    KatieC and (deleted member) like this.
  15. cruisin

    cruisin Well-Known Member

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    I love that!
  16. KCC

    KCC Active Member

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    Try this website to get replacements or to add to an existing collection. They have some of your pieces.

    http://www.replacements.com/webquote/WATKIL.htm
  17. DAngel

    DAngel Active Member

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    Swarovski has some glasses and bowls too... Swarovski's small collection.

    The price is :yikes: $600 for a vase or $415 for a set of two wine glasses :scream::yikes:
  18. cruisin

    cruisin Well-Known Member

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    Thanks, will check that out!

    That's right, I think I did see those glasses in a Swarovski store. I just never thought of them as really in the glassware business. Those stems are gorgeous, but not practical. and $$$$$ :scream:
  19. skatesindreams

    skatesindreams Well-Known Member

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    taf, I'm with you -- and your mother!
  20. Anita18

    Anita18 Well-Known Member

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    Wedding bands - acquired! We went to the mom-and-pop jewelry store we got the engagement ring at. Yay for local businesses! Alf went with brushed metal with a shiny bevel (he is definitely not a shiny guy...), and I went with teeny channel-set diamonds. The plain band was too plain, and bigger diamonds were too blingy. :p I think teeny channel-set-ones will be just right! :)

    I'm just glad we could actually get this done before the wedding, since Alf was a good boy in recovery and no longer requires a cast for his recently-broken left wrist. :)
  21. mkats

    mkats New Member

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    Pictures!! Pictures!! :)
  22. Anita18

    Anita18 Well-Known Member

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    We don't have them yet because mine has to be sized. :p The guy said they'd be done later today, but Alf wanted to pick them up next week, so they definitely should be ready by then, haha.
  23. mag

    mag Well-Known Member

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    Congratulations Anita! The rings sound lovely.
  24. vesperholly

    vesperholly Well-Known Member

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    I love buying all the random little crap that people put on their registries like spatulas and wine bottle pourers. They wanted it! For my sister's wedding, I waited until a day or two before and then bought up all the stuff that no one bought her. She was excited to get the mini whisk and stand mixer scraper :lol:

    A good friend of mine did that, and since I've been single since the dawn of time, I didn't really care (no pressure to scare up a date!). But a mutual friend, also a singleton, was really offended that she didn't get a +1. She had invited her gay roommate before getting the invite. :rolleyes:
    Last edited: Mar 31, 2013
  25. Habs

    Habs Well-Known Member

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    Mr. Habs and I were buying baby gear yesterday (found a great stroller and a diaper bag!) and got talked into doing a baby registry. We're not telling any of our friends or family... we don't want anyone to feel like they have to buy gifts for Mini-Habs. We only did a small registry to qualify for a bag of coupons and samples from the baby store, and I'm going to delete the registry online this afternoon. ;)
  26. cruisin

    cruisin Well-Known Member

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    I think it's better to not have to "scare up a date". And, the plus is that there will be others there without a date. It's like going to a High School Reunion without your spouse - more fun!

    We do have an issue for the shower. I don't like to invite people who live far away, knowing they probably won't come. It's like saying - I know you won't come, but send a gift. So, we are not planning on inviting my husband's cousins to the shower, they live in western PA. We are inviting my husband's brother's wife (AKA, daughter's Aunt). Yesterday, my husband's brother was telling me that his wife was talking to his cousins about coming to the shower. We were not inviting the cousins. this puts me in a tough situation. I really have no relationship with them. We have people staying at our house, for the shower, who we are close to. I was planning on my SIL staying here. But, I don't have room for the cousins. And, quite frankly, don't want to have to entertain the extra people here. I don't know what to do. If I had not been told, they would not have been invited. I don't want 100 people at a shower!
  27. Anita18

    Anita18 Well-Known Member

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    Ugh tell me about it. My mom has cousins she hasn't seen in years (and I've only seen once or twice), and lo and behold, they were offended when they didn't get an invite. :p My mom felt put on the spot, so she asked me to send them an invite.

    I did, but didn't include a stamp for the RSVP postcard AND it was a week after the RSVP deadline. So I'm praying they won't show up. :shuffle:

    If the cousins themselves don't express disappointment (like they did to my mom, directly), don't worry about it. You can't help what other people will say, and if they ask, tell them you didn't want to make them feel like they had to travel all the way just for a shower.
  28. Skittl1321

    Skittl1321 Well-Known Member

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    I have a had a few friends who mailed shower and wedding "announcements", best I can tell someone drops them in the mail the day of the event. That way you are 'notified' of the happening, but it is also too late to send a gift. I live states away from most of my friends.

    Habs you should just leave it up. People might ask you if you are registered somewhere, so you can get stuff you want. You don't have to offer the information. Besides, a lot of places have a 10% discount on anything that wasn't purchased after the baby is born.
  29. cruisin

    cruisin Well-Known Member

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    That's my thinking. They are invited to the wedding. But, I don't expect them to come all of the way out here for a shower. I don't know why my SIL is involving them before invites went out or asking me who is invited. These people did not come out for my shower (neither did SIL - and she was in the wedding), so I certainly didn't expect them for this one. My daughter is getting upset that so many people she doesn't know are invited. My husband doesn't get that I don't want to have to entertain virtual strangers, I want to enjoy my daughter's shower. I have enough to do already! He's always volunteering me to cook dinners for people.
  30. manleywoman

    manleywoman podcast mistress

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    A friend of ours did that. She got us the leftover measuring cups and spoons, a salad spinner, and a set of utensils. We still use them every day. :)
  31. cruisin

    cruisin Well-Known Member

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    I did that for a friend of my daughter's. I got her the garlic press/slicer and the more unusual gadgets she wanted from Williams Sonoma. Wrapped it up in a neat basket with dish towels and a recipe using most of the gadgets (it was also her favorite thing that i make :)).
  32. DAngel

    DAngel Active Member

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    Maybe you should give him the apron and tell him to do the cooking? :shuffle:
  33. Anita18

    Anita18 Well-Known Member

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    My thinking too. :shuffle:
  34. IceAlisa

    IceAlisa Port de bras!!!

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    What's the dish, if you are OK sharing it.
  35. vesperholly

    vesperholly Well-Known Member

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    Actually, all the other people without a +1 were single women ... and a handful of male teenage cousins. So, that was a bust! :lol:
  36. cruisin

    cruisin Well-Known Member

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    Ribollita, I think I may have given the recipe before, so sorry if this is a duplicate. but, my pleasure:

    1 - large red skinned onion (chopped)
    2 - carrots (diced)
    2 - sticks celery (chopped)
    4 - potatoes (diced)
    10 - zucchini (diced)
    1 - bunch swiss chard (chopped)
    1 - savoy cabbage (chopped)
    1 - bunch kale (chopped
    2 - leeks (chopped)
    11 - oz. white dried beans
    1 - 16 oz. can tomato puree (to your taste)
    1 - large loaf 2 day old (stale) Tuscan/Italian bread (not semolina)*
    If you want to speed it up, you can use fresher bread, just cut it up and put it in a 150ยบ oven until it dries out.

    Soak the beans and cook over a slow flame, according to package directions. In a large pot, gently fry the onion. When the onion is soft add the other vegetables, except the cabbage, kale, and beans (which you will add later). When the vegetables have sweated out their juices, cover with hot water, and add the cabbage and kale. Cover and simmer for about an hour over medium heat. Add the cooked beans (some whole and some pureed), salt and pepper (to taste). Leave to simmer for another 20 minutes (stirring frequently, so that the beans don’t stick to the bottom of the pot). Add the tomato puree (as much as you like, I like to use the whole can).
    The rest can be done two ways:
    1. You can use a large casserole dish and slice the stale bread and layer it with the
    soup, cover it and let it sit in the refrigerator over night, then re-heat it.
    2. (Which is the way I do it, because I can’t wait that long - lol) You can grind up the
    stale bread and mix it into the soup. The advantage to this method is that you can eat it right away. It is still better the next day, though!
    I like to drizzle a bit of extra virgin olive oil over the soup in the bowl and sprinkle it with a bit of grated romano cheese.

    *Tuscan bread is made without salt. I've never been able to find it in the US. The lack of salt makes the bread denser and gives it a different flavor. You can either make your own bread or substitute with a dense, rustic bread. It will have a slightly different flavor, but it is still amazing!
    Cute article, with a recipe, on Tuscan bread: http://www.thekitchn.com/whats-the-deal-with-tuscan-bre-126519

    We're pretty lucky, in that, the single boys will be about the same as the single girls.
    Last edited: Apr 1, 2013
  37. Anita18

    Anita18 Well-Known Member

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    So the relatives that fished for invites from my mom and she guilt-tripped me into sending them invites 1 week after the RSVP date...they're coming to the wedding. :p At least I could be reminded of who they were, because they are definitely not close to me. (I only remember relatives by the names of their kids...)

    A bitter part of me hopes they'll give big :bribe: because of this last-minute invite thing. I seriously do not need any more surprises that are only indirectly related to the actual planning itself. But at the very least, they'll keep my nosy aunt occupied so she won't bother me when she's here! :p And a number of people aren't coming so it isn't like we'll be paying more than our original catering estimate...But fishing for invites still pisses me off!
    Last edited: Apr 3, 2013
  38. PDilemma

    PDilemma Well-Known Member

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    One of my aunts fished for invites for all six of her sons (yes, she had six boys, no girls), cousins I had not seen in 5+ years and whose wives and children I had for the most part not met at all. So we gave in and sent out the invites. Only one bothered to respond with a no RSVP and one other sent a gift but no rsvp. None of them came (although we didn't expect it due to distance) and to top it all off, their invite fishing mother decided she couldn't make it either at the last minute.

    Fun times.

    Hope your fishing relatives do better than that!
  39. Skittl1321

    Skittl1321 Well-Known Member

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    That reminds me, I need to buy a gift for my cousin's wedding!

    When people invite you to destination weddings (this year we've been invited to Costa Rica and St. Thomas by cousins on both sides of the family) do they expect you to come? Or do they hold the wedding there so people won't come?
  40. cruisin

    cruisin Well-Known Member

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    I think they honestly want you to come, but don't expect it. They realize that it is expensive and that not everyone can afford to spend the money or take time off from work. What I wonder is what the rules are for gifts at destination weddings. If you've already spent hundreds of dollars, just attending, what do you do for a gift? Or is your presence the gift?