Things you hate about yourself!

Discussion in 'Off The Beaten Track' started by haribobo, Jun 29, 2010.

  1. haribobo

    haribobo Well-Known Member

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    Maybe my next post should be "Things you love about yourself" but I wanted to do this one first. :D So are there things about yourself that drive you freaking insane? I mean aside from physical flaws....more like character things. And how successful have you been at changing the things you don't like?

    For me, well there are so many things...I think the main one is my overanalyzing and stressing about how I'm being perceived to the point where I'm almost totally mute around strangers for a while. Or I force myself to make conversation but it often comes out totally dumb-sounding and I make an even worse impression than if I'd said nothing. I feel like I'm blowing opportunities left and right because I just cannot be myself until I get to know someone (which is just more time than most are willing to take) and even then I have trouble sometimes. Of course alcohol helps a whole lot but sometimes I wish I could be the way I am with 2-3 drinks in me all the time without having to drink at all. Some people are just so confident and out there right away and of course to some degree, I like not being annoying and obnoxious but other times its just massively frustrating to be so inside my own head. :wall: Anyone else?
  2. orbitz

    orbitz Well-Known Member

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    I have the same issue that you do, so I share your pain. Sometimes one can't separate one's physical flaw from one's character flaw though, which is a big problem with me. One is a direct reflection of the other.

    I wish I could be a type A personality but it's not in me.
  3. RockTheTassel

    RockTheTassel Well-Known Member

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    I totally relate to this! I'm awkward and easily embarrassed, so whenever I'm in a social situation, I always spend way too much time thinking about what to say and how to act. Just relaxing seems simple enough, but it's so hard.

    The worst part is when I'm with my family, especially my sister. It's not her fault, but she's so outgoing and fun to be around that my awkwardness seems much worse when I'm around her. I hate visiting people when she's going to be there because I know I'll either get ignored or asked questions about her.

    What helps me the most is trying to find just one or two other people to talk to. It's easy to fade into the background in a large group, but if I'm with just a couple of people it's much easier to talk and open up a bit.
  4. berthesghost

    berthesghost Well-Known Member

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    - I have a nervous laugh. It's like the Chuckles the Clown episode of MTM all the time. It's like "Lady Diana just died. Hahahaha" I don't know how to stop.

    - I have worked very hard to overcome my shyness, and have mostly succeeded. The one left over is I have trouble looking people in the eye. It's most awkward when meeting new people and shaking hands. I can't shake hands and look in the eyes at the same time. I always look at the hand I'm shaking and often, when I look up I catch the tail end of an odd look from the other person.

    - My expectations used to be so great that I'd ruin just about everything. It was most evident in my art work. I'd get so frustrated that it might not come out as I wanted, that I'd just trash it. One day I just decided to treat each piece not as a final product, but as a practice. Finally I could finish things for the first time and actually enjoy the process. Eventually this worked it's way into others aspects of my life, dating, work, etc... Now it's hard for me to listen to people's dating stories because they always start talking about a first date and if this person is "the one". It's so frustrating to watch them ruin new relationships because "he wore the wrong shirt" or "She ordered a wine cooler" etc..
  5. Anita18

    Anita18 Well-Known Member

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    I can't seem to fight the terrible habit of being late to everything. I think it mostly stems from the optimistic belief that I don't really take as long to get ready as I think I do, or that things don't take as long as I think they do. :eek:

    I missed a flight last week and spent 12 hours on standby in LAX (and another 6 hours on standby in MKE) because I didn't take "bad traffic" and "slow hotel shuttle service" and "long-ass TSA security lines" enough into account. :shuffle:

    That and the typical I'm shy/I stutter/I'm awkward stuff. (RockTheTassel, I totally know what you're talking about since my sister is a forceful, outgoing personality as well, and an overachiever to boot! :lol: But that's okay with me since she makes things interesting and I'm naturally a wallflower anyway. I don't like a lot of attention.) But I consider all those things part of my personality now anyway and I'm pretty okay with that. :lol:
  6. Ozzisk8tr

    Ozzisk8tr Well-Known Member

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    I hate doubting myself.
  7. immoimeme

    immoimeme having a nice day

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    Procrastination. I've been meaning to do something about that....
  8. MOIJTO

    MOIJTO Banned Member

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    Haha! That's for young people to be concerned about...I don't have time or want to spend the energy on silliness like that anymore! :)
  9. Holley Calmes

    Holley Calmes Well-Known Member

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    I overcommit. I can't say no. I get asked to do free stuff all the time, and rarely do I refuse. Then I get frustrated and crazy because I can't get it all done.
  10. Wyliefan

    Wyliefan Well-Known Member

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    ^This.

    ETA: Oh, and I forgot to add, my forgetfulness. :D Seriously, it's getting really bad. I used to be bad with names and faces -- now I'm bad with names, faces, and all kinds of other details. I'm starting to embarrass myself on a regular basis. :(

    Also, I wish I weren't afraid of/nervous about so many things.
    Last edited: Jun 29, 2010
  11. BlueRidge

    BlueRidge AYS's snark-sponge

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    disorganization :wall:
  12. vesperholly

    vesperholly Well-Known Member

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    omg, yes, me too. I can't stand it when people (invariably the always-on-time sort) accuse people who run late of being selfish or self-absorbed. Honestly, that's not it! It's just extreme optimism in my ability to move quickly. :lol:
    Jodi and (deleted member) like this.
  13. Angela-Fan

    Angela-Fan New Member

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    I can totally relate to being shy/awkward. I just never really know what to say, or I'll think of something to say, but the conversation will have already gone to another topic. Or, I will say something, and nobody really seems to have any interest in what i said. Or nobody even hears me because I'm so quiet. I can't stand having to shout or raise my voice to make myself heard.
    I hate that I compare myself to other girls and then feel bad about myself- I am too critical of my looks. I'm never satisfied with my hair, I'm not skinny enough, I don't look girly/feminine enough, etc...
    Oh, and i'm also pretty disorganized.
  14. Satellitegirl

    Satellitegirl New Member

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    I get really irritable if my blood sugar is low(haven't eaten breakfast or whatever) or if I haven't had good sleep. I hate being that affected mood-wise by something biological.

    ETA: I have had the nervous laughter thing get me in trouble as well before. I once told someone that someone they knew died. It wasn't funny, but I laughed....horrible horrible nervous reflex. Needless to say they were not pleased.

    And I procrastinate something awful.
    Last edited: Jun 29, 2010
  15. escaflowne9282

    escaflowne9282 Well-Known Member

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    I am disorganized. I procrastinate. I am extremely soft-spoken/shy/awkward when I really have no need to be.

    I never let things go when I should.

    I can relate to the nervous laughter, berthesghost; I giggled throughout the end of Titanic . I also have the worst tendancy to tell jokes at inappropriately sad times
  16. Aimless

    Aimless New Member

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    An aversion to making telephone calls that amounts almost to a phobia at times. Receiving calls isn't as bad. Why can't we all just email everything? I warn people that it's hard for me to make phone calls and it's rare that anybody believes me.
  17. BlueRidge

    BlueRidge AYS's snark-sponge

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    I believe you! This is one of my big issues too.
  18. manleywoman

    manleywoman podcast mistress

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    But as someone who is married to a spouse who is always late, I can't tell you how disrespectful it is, or at least comes across. Like your time is more valuable than mine, or the time of the people we're meeting. It's one of the real sticking points in our marriage. And I always lose out . . . it's not like the late person ever changes their ways, so the on-time person is always the one who has to deal.

    Things I hate about myself, and am actively trying to fix:
    1) I interrupt people.
    2) I have a prejudice. Not a racial one, but a "type" of person.
  19. Holley Calmes

    Holley Calmes Well-Known Member

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    I am so glad to hear that about phone call phobia....I have a very dear friend that has been close for 35 years, but she has rarely-if ever-picked up a phone to call me except in emergencies. I always call her, and I always think, "does she not care about me enough to initiate the contact? Why do I have to do all the work?" But I know in my heart that's not the case, so I just call her. I never considered "phone call phobia" as I am the opposite....I cold call strangers and ask for money! But I am certainly sympathetic. Thanks for enlightening me.
  20. nubka

    nubka Well-Known Member

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    Wow, lots of shy people at FSU - you'd never never know from reading this board!

    Things I hate about myself:

    Too thin-skinned (but posting at FSU had really helped that a lot - this place is not for the faint of heart, lol!)

    At times, I can be selfish.

    I talk too much.

    I love the spotlight.

    As you can see, I'm definately not perfect! :yikes:
  21. BlueRidge

    BlueRidge AYS's snark-sponge

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    Strange but true, some of the shyest people have the most posts on the board! :shuffle:

    We could start a shyness support thread if folks felt the need for it.
    numbers123 and (deleted member) like this.
  22. nerdycool

    nerdycool Well-Known Member

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    Wow, I have almost everything listed here. I'm painfully shy, have a phone phobia
    (yes, everything should be done via email!), am a procrastinator, am sometimes disorganized and often compare myself to others and find myself wanting.

    But the one I have the most problem with, is the fact that I'm a non-talker. It's not so much that I'm shy, but that I'd rather sit back and watch/listen to what's going on around me rather than contribute to the conversation. I never thought much of it until one of my co-workers mentioned that it was "creepy"... and now that's all I can think of whenever there's a group of people around. So then I try to include myself more, but generally fail.
  23. Stormy

    Stormy Well-Known Member

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    I agree about lateness. I get very anxious when I am late for anything, even by one or two minutes. It is completely disrespectful to be late when you're late because of something that's totally in your control. Lateness is a huge pet peeve of mine, can you tell?

    Things I dislike about myself:
    I procrastinate. Sometimes to the point where I get really anxious about something I haven't done (this is usually work related) and then I get angry at myself because if I hadn't procrastinated, I wouldn't be anxious. It's a bad cycle.

    I bite and pick at my cuticles. I've done it since I was pretty young so I've given up on ever breaking the habit.

    I don't worry enough about certain things.

    I am a supremely picky eater. This is probably the thing I hate most about myself. There are so many good looking things that I really want to like and I don't, like fruit and eggs. Don't get me wrong, I eat plenty. I just don't like a lot of foods, and unfortunately a lot of what I do like isn't all that healthy.
    Last edited: Jun 29, 2010
  24. MikiAndoFan#1

    MikiAndoFan#1 Well-Known Member

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    I'm shy, I stutter, I also hate to talk on the phone, I'm weird. The list goes on and on.

    :p

    One thing I love about myself: I'm very tall!

    :cheer:
  25. Veronika

    Veronika gold dust woman

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    I am in the exact same situation. I can't tell you many fights we've been in about his lateness and poor time management skills. I am someone who is usually early or on time. :angryfire

    I view being on time as very important, it's a sign of courtesy and respect to others. I don't think my husband will ever see it that way. :(
    Last edited: Jun 29, 2010
  26. mmscfdcsu

    mmscfdcsu Skating Pairs with Drew

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    ITA. And...Personality Disorders have time management problems. I can almost diagnose by what time someone shows up for their session. :(
  27. BlueRidge

    BlueRidge AYS's snark-sponge

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    Not talking is a facet of shyness and the introversion that goes with it. I have had the same problem in work situations. Its very hard to overcome.
  28. PrincessLeppard

    PrincessLeppard Well-Known Member

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    A person has to be a very good friend or a family member in order for me to call them. I always feel like I'm interrupting someone when I call.

    Also, I find talking on the phone a waste of time.

    Posting on the internet, however, is a perfectly fine waste of time. :shuffle:
    Southpaw and (deleted member) like this.
  29. snoopy

    snoopy Team St. Petersburg

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    Sometimes I don’t like to talk but it is probably more symptomatic of another flaw: laziness. But then I very rarely get mad at people mostly because of laziness too. It takes a lot of energy to be mad. So the laziness thing has its plusses and minuses.
  30. Veronika

    Veronika gold dust woman

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    Hmm, I have someone else in my life who has no regard for time, and I think she's batsh*t crazy! It all makes sense!!! :wall:
  31. PDilemma

    PDilemma Well-Known Member

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    I hate being introverted. I hate it. I wish I could change into an extroverted personality. So many people misinterpret introversion as creepiness (e.g. the not talking post above) or snobbiness or "negativity". My last boss (who is an a$$) would get angry at me that I wasn't "enjoying" something enough because I am not outwardly emotional which is a trait of introverts--things like mandatory staff bowling parties which I enjoyed plenty, I just don't jump up and down and cheer like some of the other women on the staff did. Then he would call that "negativity" and rip on me for it in evaluations (because the level to which you visibly enjoy a mandatory staff bowling party should be the basis of a teaching evaluation--but that's another issue entirely).
  32. Auntie

    Auntie New Member

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    Personality wise there is nothing that I *hate* about myself. I am far from perfect but don't obsess about things too much. I do hate my frizzy, curly hair and my saddlebags, which confront me every time I look in the mirror. Maybe if my personality issues were stamped on my forehead or attached to my thighs, I'd grow to hate them too.

    People who are chronically late? :angryfire
  33. Anita18

    Anita18 Well-Known Member

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    And that's one thing I love about my bf. He's always early to things, even when I tell him that I'm going to be home at a certain time, he's even early to THAT...and he doesn't have keys to my apartment so he has to sit by the curb and wait! :lol: He's honestly, perfectly okay with that. I can tell because when he's upset or displeased about something, you can really see it on his face (even if he doesn't say anything) and he never shows any anger at my always arriving later than he does.

    And so being late for him always makes me feel absolutely terrible, because he's so nice about it. :( Maybe he'll break me yet.

    Ugh, that sucks!

    Introversion is a huge part of my personality - I would be a completely different person if I wasn't as introverted as I am. I would have chosen different hobbies, done different things, have different friends, etc. It's really nothing to be ashamed of. (The only person who's viewed my introversion as a negative is my younger cousin who's completely socially clueless himself. :p )

    And I've been lucky enough to have friends/coworkers who understand that or are introverted themselves! Or at least we can see the "mandatory employee group stuff" as the BS that it is. :lol: Don't get us wrong, we're totally friendly and nice to people but we'd rather not spend non-working hours hanging out or whatever. :lol:
  34. mmscfdcsu

    mmscfdcsu Skating Pairs with Drew

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  35. Lionhart

    Lionhart New Member

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    I laugh at EVERYTHING. Baaaad habit. My boss once asked me to get something off of the "printy", but he meant to say "printer." I laughed so hard for a good five minutes :rofl: and then when I went back into his office later that day, I had to fight so hard not to laugh in his face because I was reminded of the printy! I realize to normal people these things really are not that funny, but I just laugh at everything.. I am cursed.
  36. mmscfdcsu

    mmscfdcsu Skating Pairs with Drew

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    You should have seen me in 8th grade when the teacher told us to "Take out a shit of paper" :rofl:
  37. triple_toe

    triple_toe Well-Known Member

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    I am a perfectionist and a control freak. On the surface, it seems like a good thing because whenever I do something, I make sure I put all of my effort into it, and I end up doing really well, but it's so... hard. People talk about crazy pressure from parents, but I had that internally. Sure, my parents always wanted me to do well in school, skating, etc., but I was the one who would freak out if I got less than 95% on anything in school, whether it was an exam, quiz, or homework assignment. I was home-schooled for a period when I was skating intensely, and it got to the point where if I got one question wrong on a quiz, I would feel like I was a failure.

    Skating did not exactly help my situation; I would kill myself day in, day out, and guess what happened? Injury. Major injury. Which brought up more control issues. I couldn't skate, couldn't walk even, for months. Fell into a major funk, and I basically felt like I was losing control of everything. I couldn't really go anywhere when I was injured, expect for physical therapy, and I slowly started becoming more and more of a recluse. I started to get panic attacks, which lead to agoraphobia because I was so anxious that I would have attacks in public places- something else that I believed was out of my control. For someone who craves perfection and control as much a I do, it felt like my entire world was falling apart. The more crazy I felt on the inside, the more I felt like I had to present an image of perfection on the outside. I was a basket case, but God forbid anyone see a slight crack in my veneer! Oh, and, tell anybody about these issues? Me? Strong-minded, driven, perfect triple_toe? Forget it. That would show weakness, a need for someone to help me, and an admission that I was NOT in control. I needed to control my control issues! :lol:

    During that time, I would never have even written on this board about these issues. It might seem ridiculous that I wasn't even able to write on an anonymous board, but there it is. I'm still dealing with it now, but I am getting better. Talking about it helps. Hell, admitting it helps. Even though I don't like that I am an insecure perfectionist who doesn't always admit I need help with *anything*, I am still ok with myself, and I am fine with taking babysteps (not going from 0 to 100% in one go) to get better, and having occasional failures. Sorry for the long-winded post, I am more of a lurker than I am a poster, but I just had to reply on this one! :)
    ChelleC and (deleted member) like this.
  38. Kasey

    Kasey Loving on babies!

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    I think there's a differentiation between "things you hate about yourself" and "things about yourself you would like to change". "Hating myself" is something I outgrew in junior high, thankfully! ;)

    That said, I am working at becoming more active on my days off instead of laying around like a slug with a book or on the computer.....and I'm neurotic about the size of my toes ;) (I have what my sister calls "preemie toes"....of course, she and my mom have monkey feet, so I don't think mine are all that tiny!)
  39. Wyliefan

    Wyliefan Well-Known Member

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    Well, it WAS kind of funny. :p

    (You have to understand, I thought that was one of the worst love stories of all time.)
  40. MR-FAN

    MR-FAN Kostner Softie

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    One thing I don't like about myself: I hate hate HATE offending anyone, even if it's not done on purpose. And so I never share my opinions on hot topics (or not-so-hot topics) in case someone around feels strongly against what I believe in. It sucks, because I have very balanced opinions and can always support my beliefs, but I'd rather not make other people uncomfortable, so I don't bother (and yet I have a great deal of respect for people who're not afraid to share and argue their opinions!)

    I also almost never share good news with others, in the off-chance that they might feel self-pity or a little jealous. and I don't share bad news cause I never need anyone to feel sorry for me. Boy I'm complex :lol: