The Mom Gene--do you have it?

Discussion in 'Off The Beaten Track' started by IceAlisa, Sep 28, 2012.

  1. gkelly

    gkelly Well-Known Member

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    And what would Gene Turner have to say on the subject?
     
  2. skatingfan5

    skatingfan5 Well-Known Member

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    What subject -- the Mom Gene or pie? Whichever subject, I would expect him to have opinions both for and against most every position, since he could evidently jump both cw and ccw. :lol:
     
  3. TygerTyger

    TygerTyger Well-Known Member

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    Okay, it all makes sense now. You had a staff.
     
  4. vesperholly

    vesperholly Well-Known Member

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    We would get along. I pick out all of the Chex and throw away the pretzels. :lol:
     
  5. Susan1

    Susan1 Active Member

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    I had one baby doll too, but I don't think I played with her much. I had a Baby First Step though, not the kind of doll you "mother". And Barbies. I never even thought about that being an indication toward how I've never really wanted kids. I did babysit for everybody in the neighborhood though. I had tons of stuffed animals, mostly dogs. (My second word was "Goggie", after "Dada". Mommy was third!) Hm.
     
  6. Lanie

    Lanie Well-Known Member

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    I meant to come back to this thread and say thanks to the encouraging comments. I appreciate it SO MUCH. I have bad PPD and add in being hard on myself and other things going on out of my control and I feel so inept.

    At least I have a happy baby, even when he has pants on his head!
     
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  7. TygerTyger

    TygerTyger Well-Known Member

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  8. HisWeirness

    HisWeirness Toes. You gotta keep 'em separated.

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    :D Great photo! A friend of mine posted this article today on facebook about motherhood, and I found it to be very touching.

    I've had the opposite experience. Probably the third question my coworkers/friends have been asking is how I feel (after when are you due and is it a boy or girl). Since I've been feeling generally ok now that I am in my second trimester (minus a couple of crappy days in the beginning), I feel that I am disappointing them because I do not have some morning sickness horror story to share. Of course, the really bad stuff :yikes: you don't want to share anyway.

    To be fair, I do try to avoid complaining about some inconveniences to others because I fear that when I am really not feeling well and need help I won't be taken seriously. It's just one of my personality habits. My husband, on the other hand, gets to hear all of the complaints. :saint:
     
  9. cruisin

    cruisin Well-Known Member

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    The worst - when you are in your 8th/9th month and you sneeze - you wet your pants! So embarrassing! :lol:
     
  10. MacMadame

    MacMadame Cat Lady-in-Training

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    NO!

    (There are too many threads about dogs already.) :mad:

    :confused: Unless you mean I had a stick that I beat people with.... ;)

    Personally I found a lot of AP practices like sleeping with the baby to work better with working than the non-AP alternatives. I'm all for being lazy and having to get out of bed to feed the baby in the middle of the night took way more energy than just having the baby right there in bed with us. And that's just for starters.
     
  11. oleada

    oleada Well-Known Member

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    HisWeirness, I didn't know a little Weird One was on the way. Congrats :)
     
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  12. TygerTyger

    TygerTyger Well-Known Member

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    I mean that, at times, someone other than yourself took care of the baby ;)

    I did the co-sleeping also, for a time. :)
    Family baths though? **** that! Momma needs her shower - sweet, sweet alone time....
     
  13. MacMadame

    MacMadame Cat Lady-in-Training

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    Well, of course. The baby had two parents after all... ;)
     
  14. TygerTyger

    TygerTyger Well-Known Member

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    :rolleyes:
     
  15. Anita18

    Anita18 Well-Known Member

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    Is it bad to assume that a baby has an involved father, or just assume that the mother is doing all the work for whatever reason, thus implying that the father is a lazy deadbeat? I think that's a lose/lose situation...:shuffle:
     
  16. MacMadame

    MacMadame Cat Lady-in-Training

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    Exactly.
     
  17. Lanie

    Lanie Well-Known Member

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    I see a lot of crap about how people just distrust men. Even fathers. Like, oh, girls only in the co-op day care? Dads can't supervise, they might molest the girls! Including their own daughter(s)! Ugh.

    My husband is way better at the parenting thing than I am.
     
  18. TygerTyger

    TygerTyger Well-Known Member

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    The eye roll was due to the fact that is is assumed that the father does his bit. That only an ass leaves the mother to do everything.
     
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2012
  19. Anita18

    Anita18 Well-Known Member

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    But then isn't it downright unfair to the fathers who DO do their bit? I prefer to assume the best of people instead of the worst...

    To be fair, my mother could only recount one male relative in our entire extended family who changed his children's diapers (the couple is now divorced and the children are estranged from their mother), but there's still a huge difference between "not knowing exactly what to do with a baby" and "ditching his children and their mother and providing no support whatsoever." :eek:

    I mean, my dad never quite knew what to do with babies, but he got into the whole fathering thing once we were older and could play baseball with him. Quite different from a deadbeat.

    My friends with twins...the dad obviously HAS to get involved. He can't breastfeed the babies himself, since he lacks the capability to do so, but mom can only physically handle one baby at a time! :lol:
     
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2012
  20. michiruwater

    michiruwater Well-Known Member

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    Should we just automatically assume that the father does not do his bit? I mean, shouldn't that be a pretty fair assumption to make?

    Um, yes. That is true. I would absolutely call someone who leaves the mother to do everything an ass.
     
  21. TygerTyger

    TygerTyger Well-Known Member

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    Ah, yeah...
    That is what I just said. It is to be assumed that the father does his bit. If he doesn't, then he ought to have to testicles removed with a rusty spoon.
     
  22. leesaleesa

    leesaleesa Active Member

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    I know a stay at home mom who seems to have it all-Wealthy husband, housekeeper, new luxury vehicles every year or so, vacations abroad, etc. I used to sort of hate her because she had it so "easy", until I found out that one of her daughters is special needs, will likely always need specialized care, and recently developed seizures. Most of her care is provided by her Mother, so she's not fobbing that responsibility off. She'll never be "free".

    The grass is not always greener. How do you think the Father of your children feels about having to bust his ass to support four people? Instead of envying others who have "more" than you do, why not make frieds with those communal Hispanic women in your area? Maybe you could meet someone you click with who could provide company and share baby sitting with.
     
  23. TygerTyger

    TygerTyger Well-Known Member

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    Whatever....

    I get annoyed at women telling me that I'm "lucky" - women who could easily afford to stay home themselves, but choose not to (which, of course, is perfectly fine) and somehow that means that I lack empathy?
    I'm annoyed at women who feel entitled to an opinion about lifestyle, in spite of the fact that they have made different choices in life.

    Boy, judging other women is sure a good time! Trying to see things from someone else's point of view? :blah:
    It's nice that you have so much sympathy for my "poor husband" though. I'll be sure to let him know. That ought to give him a laugh. He has a posh management job with low stress and a good salary. D
     
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  24. leesaleesa

    leesaleesa Active Member

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    If you don't want to be "judged" maybe you shouldn't post online how people are lucky they're not in the same room with you when they dare to comment on your public comments, wish people dead, and want to remove some poor guy's testicles with a rusty spoon.

    Yeah, I do feel sorry for your husband. A lot.
     
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2012
  25. TygerTyger

    TygerTyger Well-Known Member

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    :lol:

    Honey, are you married?
     
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2012
  26. Southpaw

    Southpaw Saint Smugpawski

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    TygerTyger, I would gladly watch your kiddies for a few hours in exchange for the entertainment of watching you detach some testicles with a rusty spoon. I don't mind watching kids as long as I get something useful out of the deal. Money isn't always necessary for me, I'm all for bartering and slapstick entertainment counts for a lot in my world. I don't even care whose testicles you detach, you pick.
     
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  27. TygerTyger

    TygerTyger Well-Known Member

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    DEAL!

    Rick Santorum is coming to WA to speak out against the legalization of Gay Marriage. Clearly his testicles need to go!

    Vote "Yes" on R-74!
     
  28. agalisgv

    agalisgv Well-Known Member

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    Just want to say I know some couples who adopted/raised babies born with drugs in their system. While it worked out long-term, for the first couple years it was complete hell. And that's with no other children in the picture. I don't know how much that applies to tygertyger, but anyone willing to take in a baby born to a meth addict has my respect.

    And yes, it does get better. So hang in there.
     
  29. numbers123

    numbers123 Well-Known Member

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    Yes, drug addicted babies are extremely taxing. I have only taken care of those babies for a very short time with lots of other people around to give me a break or two. If you are caring for an addicted baby 24/7/365 plus another infant, you may feel like no one understands what you are going through and the amount of energy is required.

    If you are caring for a drug addicted baby, you may not feel you can go out of your house/living room because you don't know what to anticipate or if you can handle everything - including the people who will tell you how you should raise your children. Comments such as "can't you control your children. You shouldn't take children out in public if you can't control them, blah,blah, blah..."
     
  30. leesaleesa

    leesaleesa Active Member

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    Not anymore, ma cher. Rather than stay and stew in misery and resent him, I left. I chose to remember the good and learn from the bad. Plenty of people have it much better than me, and plenty have it worse.
     
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