This! I can, at any point in time, decide I want to get a degree, a house, a job, move to another city, lose weight, gain weight, buy some nice clothes ... all these things I can do myself (with time and money). What I can't do is convince another person to ask me out or marry me simply because I want it to happen. It's not like there are 15 eligible bachelors knocking down my door, and I'm all "nooo gentlemen, not until I am older and wiser." Relationships are comprised of two people.