High School Reunions- Yay or Nay?

Discussion in 'Off The Beaten Track' started by SoNaoWat?, Apr 28, 2010.

  1. emason

    emason Well-Known Member

    3,358
    537
    113
    My opinion, for what it is worth: I went to high school to get an education. It WAS NOT a country club that I joined with a lifetime membership. My association with the school ended the day I graduated and went out to make my way in the world. I haven't been to one reunion in 46 years and don't plan to start now. Can you tell I didn't enjoy high school much?
     
  2. SoNaoWat?

    SoNaoWat? New Member

    353
    73
    0
    Ok, I'll concede. I can see how if HS was total torture for you and you hated it, a reunion would hold no interest whatsoever. But if you were like me, generally well-liked, but not popular, friendly but shy, one of the brainiac group but not the valedictorian or anything, it might be kind of fun.

    I can't remember what else we did last time, program-wise, but I read a poem I wrote that made everybody cry, :D and at the 10 we had a video, I think.
     
  3. skatesindreams

    skatesindreams Well-Known Member

    14,552
    2,428
    113
    I went to my 10th (HS); saw only one person that I hoped would be there, (in a class of over 500), and said "Never Again"!
     
  4. orbitz

    orbitz Well-Known Member

    9,966
    749
    113
    It really depends on what kind of memories you have of your high school experiences, how fond you are of them, and how many people from those days you would truly be delighted in seeing again. If you are only so-so or meh on any of those then I don't see the point of going....unless of course you've become a superstar and want to go back to say "Neh, neh, neh. LOOK AT ME" :lol:
     
  5. Cyn

    Cyn Well-Known Member

    21,222
    5,556
    113
    That's kind of how I was in HS - I had a core group of friends who came from different cliques, but somehow the five of us got along famously. The five years I was there (our HS was 8th-12th - there was no Jr. High or Middle School until the year after I graduated), I never fully associated with any one group.

    My friends came from all groups - the brainiac/academic crowd, the burners :smokin: (it still cracks me up that our HS actually had a designated smoking section for students :rofl: ), athletes, the uber-:drama: arteests, band geeks, cheerleaders, etc. I was a majorette for 4 years and a cheerleader my Senior year, but I was also editor of our Literary "magazine" (one big issue done every year), in Chorale/Women's chorus, Interact (youth division of the Rotary Club), and so on and so forth. I blended fairly well until midway through Senior year when I decided I was pissed at the world and went punk (the attempted Annabella Lwin shaved head/hairstyle went over *real* well with the cheerleading squad :rofl: ).

    Matter of fact, some of the gals I've reconnected with on FB are planning a get-together for the females from our class for later this summer - sort of a mini-reunion, only without any of the guys. For the first time, I'm really looking forward to seeing a lot of the people I lost touch with following graduation.

    ***********

    My mother was president of her Senior class, and as such, she's usually in charge of planning their reunions (with help from the other class officers and a few volunteers. Last year was their 50th :wideeyes: , and they had an absolute blast. I actually went to Mom's 40th reunion with her as my Dad always felt like a fish out of water at those kinds of events (he was 13 years older than Mom, plus he had no interest in his own reunions), and that started a trend of many of her classmates bringing their daughters (having graduated in 1959, most of them did what they were "supposed" to do and got married and started breeding around the same time, so all of their kids are roughly the same age :lol: . I've made some good friends that way, and our parents think it's a hoot that they've passed "their" friendships down to the next generation.
     
  6. danceronice

    danceronice Corgi Wrangler

    6,485
    524
    113
    I really can't imagine bothering unless someone REALLY pestered me about it. (Someone where I actually felt something beyond indifference about them in a positive direction.)

    It may also be a family thing. My mother went to the same high school as me and has never done reunions (unless you count inadvertently as one of our English teachers is one of her classmates) and I doubt my dad's ever even though about going to his. I think he went to two different high schools, both in Detroit, and I can't imagine why he'd bother.

    I might consider at some point heading to my UNIVERSITY homecoming (we're very small and close-knit even when we don't actually know each other. W&L tends to create rather pathological devotion among alumni.)
     
  7. Debbie S

    Debbie S Well-Known Member

    6,428
    861
    113
    My 20th (how did that happen? :eek:) h.s. reunion is this weekend. I'm not going. I haven't been to any. I liked my h.s., but I just don't feel attached to my class, so I have no desire to see any of them again. It's not personal - I started in 10th grade (school is a K-12 private school) so I was always kind of on the outside. I got a great education, and I give each year to the annual fund, but I'm just not into my classmates. If I'd gone there since 1st grade, I'd probably be real gung-ho on reunion, but it's just kind of meh to me.

    I went to my 5th college reunion but not to the next 2. I had a good time at my 5th and it was good to see everyone, but I got kind of cynical about it approaching the 10th - why do I need to spend money for flight, hotel, meals, reg fee just to see people that I only see at reunion? At my 5th, I did reconnect with someone I hadn't been in touch with - she lives about an hour away - and we did get together a few times after that, but we lost touch again. Eh, whatever. In 3 years, if I feel I've accomplished enough in my life that I won't look like a tree stump in front of my classmates, I might go to the 20th, or I might not bother either way.
     
  8. Jayar

    Jayar Well-Known Member

    8,647
    2,177
    113
    While I can't say that I have lived every one of your experiences in high school, I can say that my experience was a mixed bag. I had those who loved me and those who wanted to beat me up... no in between. But I am going to my 20th reunion because I spent so much time with these people, and I want to physically see them again. There were only 102 graduates in my class, and I believe that there are only 92 of left. Of that, I believe that 50% are coming to the reunion. We are having a potluck at a park. It costs nothing to attend (I grew up in an economically depressed area), and our little facebook group is growing in excitement. Most of us know what we are all up to thanks to facebook, so we'll just focus on having a good time. WHEEE!
     
  9. bobalina77

    bobalina77 Duck Hunter

    7,061
    382
    0
    I can't believe some schools have a 5 year reunion.. I don't think enough changes in 10 years! Like I said.. I didn't go to my 10th but I did go to my best friend's 10th because that was who I hung out with in highschool. You'd be surprised how many people thought I had actually graduated with them. I had actually graduated the year before haha. The interesting thing was how everyone kinda mingled at the beginning but sure enough an hour in everyone was in their own little cliques again.
     
  10. Civic

    Civic New Member

    6,262
    657
    0
    I attended my high school class 10 year reunion and had a good time. I attended college half way across the country and hadn't really kept in touch with most of my classmates so it was nice seeing people again and catching up with one another. I started grad school shortly afterwards then moved to another state and lost touch with people again.:(

    OTOH, I've attended 4 of my college class' reunions and will probably attend our 30-year reunion next summer. The difference is that my college does a better job of keeping in touch with its alumni than my old high school and I've kept in better touch with my college classmates than I did with the folks from high school.
     
  11. Veronika

    Veronika gold dust woman

    4,144
    1,134
    113
    My class had a 5-year reunion, but it was very poorly attended (about 25 people out of 400.) I didn't go to that one, I thought it was pointless since not much happens in 5 years.

    I did go to my 10-year reunion, and I had fun. But the odd thing was that people still stuck with their old groups/cliques when they were chatting...old habits die hard? When we sat down to have dinner, most people sat with their old HS groups. (My HS had a reputation of being very clique-y, and I guess that's still true.)

    I did end up talking to some people who I hadn't talked to since elementary school, which was interesting.

    If we do have a 15-year reunion, I will proably go. But we'll see.
     
  12. Aimless

    Aimless New Member

    467
    96
    0
    I went to a prep school and the reunions are held every five years over a weekend in the old dormitories. They are well organized and comfortable for spouses and kids if you want to bring them along. The experiences are close to magical. There's an intimacy and a knowledge and acceptance between us, even with people I did not know at all, that I never experience at any other time. These people can journey back with me to the dawning of adult consciousness. I've been reminded of things I did, said, or created that I'd completely forgotten. I know of instances where unhappy misunderstandings that plagued us into adulthood were cleared up in a minute or two. You are free to talk to anybody, even those super popular girls or football types who you couldn't approach when you were in high school. You can rewrite your own personal history. People will tell you, often generously and kindly, how they perceived you back then and that can be a real eye opener in a good way.

    Furthermore there are countless stories of romantic reconnections or connections at these events. It happened to me and was a really profound experience.

    Clearly, reading these responses and having talked to people about this before, the reunion experience is different and not fun for a lot of people. But I always come away from these reunions feeling connected and knowing myself better.
     
  13. Aceon6

    Aceon6 Get off my lawn

    6,635
    1,108
    113
    Haven't been to any, although I have been curious and was hoping to attend the 40th. I was a loner in HS with only a few, close friends. Most of the reunion folks are people I'd categorize as acquaintances.

    Unfortunately, most of the committee folks now live about an hour south of the school and pick restaurants in their communities, so what could be a 90 minute drive is closer to 2 1/2 hours, making it a tough decision. Our family doesn't live there anymore, so I'd have no place to stay. If they'd do something closer, I'll go to the 50th.
     
  14. PDilemma

    PDilemma Well-Known Member

    4,872
    821
    113
    I think all high schools are very clique-y. It's the nature of teenagers. Heck, I think it's the nature of being human. And I increasingly find it strange that we get bent out of shape when the kids in band hang out together and the kids in sports hang out together, etc...In all actuality, it is perfectly normal for people to seek out the company of others that they share common interests and abilities with. Somehow, though, when high school kids do it, we find it upsetting. As long as they are all being nice to each other outside those groups, we should relax about that.

    But...on topic--what you say about people staying in their groups is the exact thing my aunt says changes dramatically at reunions of 30+ years, making them a heck of a lot more fun, according to her.
     
  15. CynicElle

    CynicElle Well-Known Member

    2,174
    373
    83
    I went to my five-year reunion, and it was a complete waste of time; I hung out with my roommate (who had been my best friend in HS) for most of the evening, and nobody I was genuinely curious about showed up.

    I've reconnected with a lot of my old classmates via Facebook and it's been interesting to see where everyone's ended up, but I'm not sure that's going to be enough to get me to go to my 25th :)yikes::scream:) next year. I'm still the same old wallflower I was back in high school.
     
    PeterG and (deleted member) like this.
  16. rjblue

    rjblue Re-registered User

    5,878
    864
    113
    I went to school with some of the people in my class for 12 years. We were friends, but I come from an area where probably at least half the class lives in other provinces now. I went to my 10 year reunion as a last minute whim (couldn't go to the banquet though) and had so much fun that I didn't think twice about going to my 25th.

    I think a higher percentage attended from those who had to come from afar, and many of the local people stayed away.

    The "guys in the band" even got back together and rehearsed 3 songs to perform for us, and we made them do the whole set twice.

    My class was 152 people. I think that is the right size to have enough people spread out to want to reunite, and yet small enough to mostly all know and remember each other.
     
  17. numbers123

    numbers123 Well-Known Member

    30,765
    5,026
    113
    DH's 40th class reunion is being planned by the woman who introduced us in high school (yeah, we were high school sweethearts and will be married for 37 years in August). I suppose we will attend just because she is planning it. I don't know that I am looking forward to it.
     
  18. BaileyCatts

    BaileyCatts Well-Known Member

    5,981
    472
    83
    Oh hellz to the no!! :scream: Couldn't pay me to attend. I attend two high schools ... went K-10th grade in one school system then moved to Connecticut for 11-12. I completely and totally despise anything and everything about that "other" high school I was forced to attend my last two years of high school and graduated from. Biggest bunch of arrogant, elitist, snobby, selfish, rude, stuck up bunch of people I've ever met in my life. There's not enough money in the world to make me ever attend a reunion with those people.

    We moved back to the same city I spent K-10 grade 3 months after I graduated high school. I've gotten invites to that one (because I consider myself a graduate of my real high school and put my name on the alumni lists rather than the one I actually graduated from), but I've never attended any of those either. It had its fair share of snobs as well, and really ... I deal with enough bytches at work every day that are even more clique-ish than high school was, I don't need to deal with the real high school ones as well. :lol:
     
  19. NeilJLeonard

    NeilJLeonard Well-Known Member

    3,980
    1,024
    113
    I'm going to say yay.

    My 50th anniversary reunion is on May 21-23 about 1/2 mile from where I lived during my Senior year in high school. This was the 2nd high school I attended and, of course, the one I graduated from. I had a few friends there, many from the junior class behind me. From what I gather many of the people I did know will be attending. Oddly, I believe that the best friend I had from the 1st High School I attended now live in the same County as the school I graduated from.

    I am attending the reunion. It's a 4 to 5 hour 1 way trip from my home, but I am curious about some of the people that will be attending. I'm also going to try to contact the people from the class behind me that I hear still live there. And, I'm going to try to find that other person from my 1st school, too.

    It may or may not be fun, but I think that it has to be interesting.

    NJL (Hopefully, driving over The Sunshine Skyway bridge won't be the highlight of the trip...;)...)

    ETA: Got word that 140+ grads will be attending, of some 400 or so in the graduating class. There is a rather extensive list of grads that are on the "In Memorium" list. The hotel it is in is sold out with all rooms going to the class of '60, as is the closest hotel to the high school itself, which has been built on the site of the high school's former football stadium....:D...The EMail I got also promised a grand time for all that attend. I hope so. We'll see.
     
    Last edited: Apr 29, 2010
    mmscfdcsu and (deleted member) like this.
  20. GaPeach

    GaPeach New Member

    834
    239
    0
    My reunions were cancelled due to lack of interest, but even if they were not, there isn't enough booze in the world to get me to sit with those rednecks.
     
  21. SoNaoWat?

    SoNaoWat? New Member

    353
    73
    0
    I might have forgotten to mention that I went to the same school my entire 12 years. I mean in the same town, and so did probably the majority of the class. And for what it's worth, as much as I've been pushing the class reunion thing, I might have a harder time going, both financially and emotionally, if I had to travel a long way, but since I still live in the town where I graduated, I'm all for it! :) We don't have a lot of options for nice places to have the grownups only night, but I'm sure we'll think of something. My biggest issue is what to wear for the more dressy night!?
     
  22. Moto Guzzi

    Moto Guzzi Well-Known Member

    1,781
    740
    113
    My class reunion is coming up in another week, and I plan to attend. Our last one was 10 years ago. It's always interesting for me to go to one of our reunions because I've stayed in touch with only a few of my classmates. I went to a small high school where everybody knew everybody else. Many of my classmates stayed in the same state.

    I always get asked a lot of questions because people think my life is exciting, and I suppose it is to somebody who has never traveled and has worked a boring job since graduation. I was rather shy all through high school, and it amuses me to be thought to be so worldly now.

    I've never gone to a college reunion, though. I don't feel the same connection to my college friends as I do to my high school friends.
     
  23. overedge

    overedge Well-Known Member

    18,167
    2,712
    113
    I went to one high school until the end of Grade 10, and then went to a different school for Grades 11 and 12, but the first school is where all my friends from elementary and junior high went - so I get invited to grad reunions for both.

    Both grad classes had their 30th anniv. reunion two years ago. The school I actually graduated from had its reunion at a frickin' yacht club that was two hours drive from the actual school, and which was formal dress only. What this had to do with the school and the neighbourhood we actually were part of, I have no idea...other than that I think some of the organizers belonged to this club and wanted to show off how much they had "achieved" (which judging from the pictures seemed to involve a lot of Botox at this point). So I refused to go.

    The class that I'm informally part of had its reunion at a local pub that they rented out for the evening, casual dress was fine, and everyone had a blast.

    So I think whether a reunion is good or not depends on what the organizers' motivations are.
     
  24. arena_gal

    arena_gal New Member

    84
    4
    0
    My high school was split into two cliques, and at prom, one clique ruled the prom and the other clique ran the anti-prom. I went to the anti-prom, although I didn't belong to that clique, because you could go as a single and I had no interest in dating. The "real" prom required a date.

    Reunions have always been planned by the prom clique. They have been recreations of the prom night, and are always held at the same place as the original prom. Sorry, I don't want to relive any of that night because I, and half the class wasn't there. I would be interested in going back there, and have a tour of the school and smell the gym ! and see if the initials I put into the fresh cement are still there. The whole school is having a 50th anniversary, for all former students and I'll probably go to that one.
     
  25. cruisin

    cruisin Well-Known Member

    17,561
    1,170
    113
    I went to my 20th. It was okay, not great. I was very quiet and overweight in high school. Didn't have many friends and didn't keep in touch with the ones I had. I figure, if I didn't care enough to stay in touch, why bother. but I went out of curiosity. No one had a clue who I was :lol:, I'm thin now. What they did was make copies of the yearbook photos and as each person came in, they were given a yearbook photo of someone. They were, then, supposed to find the person in the photo. At the end of the night, the person who had mine finally gave up and they asked me to step forward. :lol:

    The funny thing was that all of the "hot" cheer leader types from high school looked awful. They were kind of stuck in their "high school look", had gained weight, and seemed like they just never moved forward. The ones, like me, who were either late bloomers physically, or nerdy types, all seemed to get better. I heard, through a former neighbor's mother, that lots of people who went to the reunion were commenting on my "transformation". I'd "transformed" 18 years before and it seemed so odd. I'm now 57, so my 40th would be coming up. Didn't go to the 30th and won't go to the 40th. Going to the 20th was a curiosity thing, not worth doing again.
     
  26. silverstars

    silverstars New Member

    1,117
    76
    0
    The best part of my high school graduation was the fact that I knew that I'd never have to see the people in my class ever again.

    So that'd be a nay.
     
  27. dobiesk8r

    dobiesk8r New Member

    357
    74
    0
    So true.

    My daughter is graduating from W&L in less than a month. She has loved her time there. One of the things that decided her on the school was the enthusiasm of its alums, one of whom is a very good friend of ours.

    As for me, I didn't go to my 5 year reunion, as I had a promising date that night. The date became my fiance 6 months later. I went to my 10th, and then to my 20th, and then said "Enough" when it came to the 30th.
     
  28. Ziggy

    Ziggy Well-Known Member

    20,569
    1,599
    113
    Why do people go to those?

    Self-harm I guess. :p
     
  29. VALuvsMKwan

    VALuvsMKwan Wandering Goy

    5,027
    1,581
    113
    Ummm, not always.

    For me, after living a certain number of years, and losing people close to me over the last few years, I hear the clock ticking a bit. So maybe for me, it's a bit of life coming full circle and seeing where the wandering paths in all of our lives have taken us.

    Growing up gay in a small Southern town in the early 1970s wasn't exactly a picnic, but I still had a tight group of friends to hold on to, did a lot of school activities, particularly band, and by senior year was having pretty much of a fun time - senior class trip to DC, senior night show where I entered a skit about reunions with 5 ladies on my arm (we were all spoofing our current reputations), and knowing/hoping that everything would change after that year.

    The 2 public high schools in my hometown (later merged into 1 after full desegregation - I am from SE Virginia, after all :rolleyes:) are having a combined reunion of all the classes from 1970 through 1980. This would technically be my 37th year reunion. :eek: I think my class of 1973 will have the most attendees, based on the list on the event website.

    There has been an organizing effort, largely on Facebook, and a lot of people has reconnected through that and learned what has been going on in each other lives. Both my younger brother's class and his wife's are part of the group, so they will both be there, and my older brother is class of 1969 and lives less than a mile from where the main party will be held, so I imagine that he and a few members of that class may show up as well.

    Some irony - the main employer for the area, existing over 100 years, will have just closed completely on June 30 (the reunion is August 11 -12). A lot of people at the reunion, including me and both my brothers, either work there now or have worked there at some point in our lives (in fact, both my parents, several uncles, a sister-in-law and cousins all did at some point, and the younger brother whom I mentioned earlier is losing his job when the plant finally shuts down). :(

    For a lot of people, this reunion, right at this time, is going to bring back a lot of memories of our hometown and the way our lives used to be, probably even more so than usual. I'm not sure that is such a bad thing, at this point in our lives, with enough separation from both the good and bad of our high school years.

    One more evidence of ironic timing - the Saturday event is 2 years to the day since my roommate and companion of 20 years died. I wonder if I could have talked him into going to it for shits and giggles - he might have finally seen part of why I am as nuts as I am. ;)
     
  30. vesperholly

    vesperholly Well-Known Member

    7,663
    1,256
    113
    I went to my 10-year reunion and had a blast. Several people who I was good friends with in high school were there, so I knew that at least I'd be able to see them. I was surprised at how un-cliquey it actually was. Sure, people still hung out in groups, but a lot of people that I was not friends with stopped me with "Hi vesperholly!!" and we had nice chats.