High School Reunions- Yay or Nay?

Discussion in 'Off The Beaten Track' started by SoNaoWat?, Apr 28, 2010.

  1. Veronika

    Veronika gold dust woman

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    My class had a 5-year reunion, but it was very poorly attended (about 25 people out of 400.) I didn't go to that one, I thought it was pointless since not much happens in 5 years.

    I did go to my 10-year reunion, and I had fun. But the odd thing was that people still stuck with their old groups/cliques when they were chatting...old habits die hard? When we sat down to have dinner, most people sat with their old HS groups. (My HS had a reputation of being very clique-y, and I guess that's still true.)

    I did end up talking to some people who I hadn't talked to since elementary school, which was interesting.

    If we do have a 15-year reunion, I will proably go. But we'll see.
  2. Aimless

    Aimless New Member

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    I went to a prep school and the reunions are held every five years over a weekend in the old dormitories. They are well organized and comfortable for spouses and kids if you want to bring them along. The experiences are close to magical. There's an intimacy and a knowledge and acceptance between us, even with people I did not know at all, that I never experience at any other time. These people can journey back with me to the dawning of adult consciousness. I've been reminded of things I did, said, or created that I'd completely forgotten. I know of instances where unhappy misunderstandings that plagued us into adulthood were cleared up in a minute or two. You are free to talk to anybody, even those super popular girls or football types who you couldn't approach when you were in high school. You can rewrite your own personal history. People will tell you, often generously and kindly, how they perceived you back then and that can be a real eye opener in a good way.

    Furthermore there are countless stories of romantic reconnections or connections at these events. It happened to me and was a really profound experience.

    Clearly, reading these responses and having talked to people about this before, the reunion experience is different and not fun for a lot of people. But I always come away from these reunions feeling connected and knowing myself better.
  3. Aceon6

    Aceon6 Get off my lawn

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    Haven't been to any, although I have been curious and was hoping to attend the 40th. I was a loner in HS with only a few, close friends. Most of the reunion folks are people I'd categorize as acquaintances.

    Unfortunately, most of the committee folks now live about an hour south of the school and pick restaurants in their communities, so what could be a 90 minute drive is closer to 2 1/2 hours, making it a tough decision. Our family doesn't live there anymore, so I'd have no place to stay. If they'd do something closer, I'll go to the 50th.
  4. PDilemma

    PDilemma Well-Known Member

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    I think all high schools are very clique-y. It's the nature of teenagers. Heck, I think it's the nature of being human. And I increasingly find it strange that we get bent out of shape when the kids in band hang out together and the kids in sports hang out together, etc...In all actuality, it is perfectly normal for people to seek out the company of others that they share common interests and abilities with. Somehow, though, when high school kids do it, we find it upsetting. As long as they are all being nice to each other outside those groups, we should relax about that.

    But...on topic--what you say about people staying in their groups is the exact thing my aunt says changes dramatically at reunions of 30+ years, making them a heck of a lot more fun, according to her.
  5. CynicElle

    CynicElle Well-Known Member

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    I went to my five-year reunion, and it was a complete waste of time; I hung out with my roommate (who had been my best friend in HS) for most of the evening, and nobody I was genuinely curious about showed up.

    I've reconnected with a lot of my old classmates via Facebook and it's been interesting to see where everyone's ended up, but I'm not sure that's going to be enough to get me to go to my 25th :)yikes::scream:) next year. I'm still the same old wallflower I was back in high school.
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  6. rjblue

    rjblue Re-registered User

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    I went to school with some of the people in my class for 12 years. We were friends, but I come from an area where probably at least half the class lives in other provinces now. I went to my 10 year reunion as a last minute whim (couldn't go to the banquet though) and had so much fun that I didn't think twice about going to my 25th.

    I think a higher percentage attended from those who had to come from afar, and many of the local people stayed away.

    The "guys in the band" even got back together and rehearsed 3 songs to perform for us, and we made them do the whole set twice.

    My class was 152 people. I think that is the right size to have enough people spread out to want to reunite, and yet small enough to mostly all know and remember each other.
  7. numbers123

    numbers123 Well-Known Member

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    DH's 40th class reunion is being planned by the woman who introduced us in high school (yeah, we were high school sweethearts and will be married for 37 years in August). I suppose we will attend just because she is planning it. I don't know that I am looking forward to it.
  8. BaileyCatts

    BaileyCatts Well-Known Member

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    Oh hellz to the no!! :scream: Couldn't pay me to attend. I attend two high schools ... went K-10th grade in one school system then moved to Connecticut for 11-12. I completely and totally despise anything and everything about that "other" high school I was forced to attend my last two years of high school and graduated from. Biggest bunch of arrogant, elitist, snobby, selfish, rude, stuck up bunch of people I've ever met in my life. There's not enough money in the world to make me ever attend a reunion with those people.

    We moved back to the same city I spent K-10 grade 3 months after I graduated high school. I've gotten invites to that one (because I consider myself a graduate of my real high school and put my name on the alumni lists rather than the one I actually graduated from), but I've never attended any of those either. It had its fair share of snobs as well, and really ... I deal with enough bytches at work every day that are even more clique-ish than high school was, I don't need to deal with the real high school ones as well. :lol:
  9. NeilJLeonard

    NeilJLeonard Well-Known Member

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    I'm going to say yay.

    My 50th anniversary reunion is on May 21-23 about 1/2 mile from where I lived during my Senior year in high school. This was the 2nd high school I attended and, of course, the one I graduated from. I had a few friends there, many from the junior class behind me. From what I gather many of the people I did know will be attending. Oddly, I believe that the best friend I had from the 1st High School I attended now live in the same County as the school I graduated from.

    I am attending the reunion. It's a 4 to 5 hour 1 way trip from my home, but I am curious about some of the people that will be attending. I'm also going to try to contact the people from the class behind me that I hear still live there. And, I'm going to try to find that other person from my 1st school, too.

    It may or may not be fun, but I think that it has to be interesting.

    NJL (Hopefully, driving over The Sunshine Skyway bridge won't be the highlight of the trip...;)...)

    ETA: Got word that 140+ grads will be attending, of some 400 or so in the graduating class. There is a rather extensive list of grads that are on the "In Memorium" list. The hotel it is in is sold out with all rooms going to the class of '60, as is the closest hotel to the high school itself, which has been built on the site of the high school's former football stadium....:D...The EMail I got also promised a grand time for all that attend. I hope so. We'll see.
    Last edited: Apr 29, 2010
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  10. GaPeach

    GaPeach New Member

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    My reunions were cancelled due to lack of interest, but even if they were not, there isn't enough booze in the world to get me to sit with those rednecks.
  11. SoNaoWat?

    SoNaoWat? New Member

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    I might have forgotten to mention that I went to the same school my entire 12 years. I mean in the same town, and so did probably the majority of the class. And for what it's worth, as much as I've been pushing the class reunion thing, I might have a harder time going, both financially and emotionally, if I had to travel a long way, but since I still live in the town where I graduated, I'm all for it! :) We don't have a lot of options for nice places to have the grownups only night, but I'm sure we'll think of something. My biggest issue is what to wear for the more dressy night!?
  12. Moto Guzzi

    Moto Guzzi Well-Known Member

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    My class reunion is coming up in another week, and I plan to attend. Our last one was 10 years ago. It's always interesting for me to go to one of our reunions because I've stayed in touch with only a few of my classmates. I went to a small high school where everybody knew everybody else. Many of my classmates stayed in the same state.

    I always get asked a lot of questions because people think my life is exciting, and I suppose it is to somebody who has never traveled and has worked a boring job since graduation. I was rather shy all through high school, and it amuses me to be thought to be so worldly now.

    I've never gone to a college reunion, though. I don't feel the same connection to my college friends as I do to my high school friends.
  13. overedge

    overedge Well-Known Member

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    I went to one high school until the end of Grade 10, and then went to a different school for Grades 11 and 12, but the first school is where all my friends from elementary and junior high went - so I get invited to grad reunions for both.

    Both grad classes had their 30th anniv. reunion two years ago. The school I actually graduated from had its reunion at a frickin' yacht club that was two hours drive from the actual school, and which was formal dress only. What this had to do with the school and the neighbourhood we actually were part of, I have no idea...other than that I think some of the organizers belonged to this club and wanted to show off how much they had "achieved" (which judging from the pictures seemed to involve a lot of Botox at this point). So I refused to go.

    The class that I'm informally part of had its reunion at a local pub that they rented out for the evening, casual dress was fine, and everyone had a blast.

    So I think whether a reunion is good or not depends on what the organizers' motivations are.
  14. arena_gal

    arena_gal New Member

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    My high school was split into two cliques, and at prom, one clique ruled the prom and the other clique ran the anti-prom. I went to the anti-prom, although I didn't belong to that clique, because you could go as a single and I had no interest in dating. The "real" prom required a date.

    Reunions have always been planned by the prom clique. They have been recreations of the prom night, and are always held at the same place as the original prom. Sorry, I don't want to relive any of that night because I, and half the class wasn't there. I would be interested in going back there, and have a tour of the school and smell the gym ! and see if the initials I put into the fresh cement are still there. The whole school is having a 50th anniversary, for all former students and I'll probably go to that one.
  15. cruisin

    cruisin Well-Known Member

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    I went to my 20th. It was okay, not great. I was very quiet and overweight in high school. Didn't have many friends and didn't keep in touch with the ones I had. I figure, if I didn't care enough to stay in touch, why bother. but I went out of curiosity. No one had a clue who I was :lol:, I'm thin now. What they did was make copies of the yearbook photos and as each person came in, they were given a yearbook photo of someone. They were, then, supposed to find the person in the photo. At the end of the night, the person who had mine finally gave up and they asked me to step forward. :lol:

    The funny thing was that all of the "hot" cheer leader types from high school looked awful. They were kind of stuck in their "high school look", had gained weight, and seemed like they just never moved forward. The ones, like me, who were either late bloomers physically, or nerdy types, all seemed to get better. I heard, through a former neighbor's mother, that lots of people who went to the reunion were commenting on my "transformation". I'd "transformed" 18 years before and it seemed so odd. I'm now 57, so my 40th would be coming up. Didn't go to the 30th and won't go to the 40th. Going to the 20th was a curiosity thing, not worth doing again.
  16. silverstars

    silverstars New Member

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    The best part of my high school graduation was the fact that I knew that I'd never have to see the people in my class ever again.

    So that'd be a nay.
  17. dobiesk8r

    dobiesk8r New Member

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    So true.

    My daughter is graduating from W&L in less than a month. She has loved her time there. One of the things that decided her on the school was the enthusiasm of its alums, one of whom is a very good friend of ours.

    As for me, I didn't go to my 5 year reunion, as I had a promising date that night. The date became my fiance 6 months later. I went to my 10th, and then to my 20th, and then said "Enough" when it came to the 30th.
  18. Ziggy

    Ziggy Well-Known Member

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    Why do people go to those?

    Self-harm I guess. :p
  19. VALuvsMKwan

    VALuvsMKwan Wandering Goy

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    Ummm, not always.

    For me, after living a certain number of years, and losing people close to me over the last few years, I hear the clock ticking a bit. So maybe for me, it's a bit of life coming full circle and seeing where the wandering paths in all of our lives have taken us.

    Growing up gay in a small Southern town in the early 1970s wasn't exactly a picnic, but I still had a tight group of friends to hold on to, did a lot of school activities, particularly band, and by senior year was having pretty much of a fun time - senior class trip to DC, senior night show where I entered a skit about reunions with 5 ladies on my arm (we were all spoofing our current reputations), and knowing/hoping that everything would change after that year.

    The 2 public high schools in my hometown (later merged into 1 after full desegregation - I am from SE Virginia, after all :rolleyes:) are having a combined reunion of all the classes from 1970 through 1980. This would technically be my 37th year reunion. :eek: I think my class of 1973 will have the most attendees, based on the list on the event website.

    There has been an organizing effort, largely on Facebook, and a lot of people has reconnected through that and learned what has been going on in each other lives. Both my younger brother's class and his wife's are part of the group, so they will both be there, and my older brother is class of 1969 and lives less than a mile from where the main party will be held, so I imagine that he and a few members of that class may show up as well.

    Some irony - the main employer for the area, existing over 100 years, will have just closed completely on June 30 (the reunion is August 11 -12). A lot of people at the reunion, including me and both my brothers, either work there now or have worked there at some point in our lives (in fact, both my parents, several uncles, a sister-in-law and cousins all did at some point, and the younger brother whom I mentioned earlier is losing his job when the plant finally shuts down). :(

    For a lot of people, this reunion, right at this time, is going to bring back a lot of memories of our hometown and the way our lives used to be, probably even more so than usual. I'm not sure that is such a bad thing, at this point in our lives, with enough separation from both the good and bad of our high school years.

    One more evidence of ironic timing - the Saturday event is 2 years to the day since my roommate and companion of 20 years died. I wonder if I could have talked him into going to it for shits and giggles - he might have finally seen part of why I am as nuts as I am. ;)
  20. vesperholly

    vesperholly Well-Known Member

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    I went to my 10-year reunion and had a blast. Several people who I was good friends with in high school were there, so I knew that at least I'd be able to see them. I was surprised at how un-cliquey it actually was. Sure, people still hung out in groups, but a lot of people that I was not friends with stopped me with "Hi vesperholly!!" and we had nice chats.
  21. emason

    emason Well-Known Member

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    Well, my mother's high school reunions were cancelled because there was an organizing committee of 3 - a married couple and another woman. Well, hubby dumped wife of 40 years for the other woman on the committee, so bye-bye committee and bye-bye reunions.
  22. jenniferlyon

    jenniferlyon Well-Known Member

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    Where I live, my school's alumni seem to have multi-class reunions on a regular basis. Everybody who graduated anytime near a particular class meets up at one of the bars or clubs in our hometown. So far, I haven't attended any of these gatherings or any of the more formal, official reunions. I've stayed in touch with a couple of my closest high school friends and I've found others more recently on Facebook. I had lunch with one old friend I hadn't seen in awhile, but I'm not really up for a large reunion of any kind.
  23. Moto Guzzi

    Moto Guzzi Well-Known Member

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    I just came back from my class reunion and had a wonderful time. We went to a small high school where everybody pretty much knew everybody. Enough time has gone by that all the old cliques are no longer important; I saw people talking to people they never would have spoken to in high school.

    The first night we met at a restaurant/club, and we closed the place down. Nobody wanted to leave because we were having too much fun. Our high school has an annual alumni dinner so our class met there the next day and talked for hours. We toured the school with a high school senior who showed us all the changes. She quickly learned that she had to shout to make herself heard and that we had a lot of crazy stories. In the band room, one classmate sat down at the drums and played a solo; she said she hadn't played in over 20 years but it came back quickly. In the business department, some of us remembered the time my sister came to visit me in class--outside on the ledge. She danced around 2 stories up, whacked her head on a window frame, and windmilled her arms wildly to keep from falling off.

    After the dinner, we went to a club and stayed until they threw us out. We voted to have another reunion in 5 years and to try to get together more frequently in the years in between when somebody comes home for a visit. Some of us are on Facebook and plan to stay in touch there, too. I've gone to several reunions, but this was the best one yet.
  24. IceKween

    IceKween New Member

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    I'm planning on going to 3 twenty year reunions (my parents moved me around alot). They start the last weekend of July. I can't wait. I went to a 20y reunion for the class ahead of me this past year and loved it. It's great when you don't really look different from high school and haven't gained weight or aged. I will lurve the reunion tour....
  25. SoNaoWat?

    SoNaoWat? New Member

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    Moto- That is wonderful! Sounds like you had a reunion experience the way it's supposed to be. We've got our second planning meeting tomorrow evening, and I hope we have a good turnout.
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  26. NeilJLeonard

    NeilJLeonard Well-Known Member

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    Mine starts this Friday evening, 5/21/10 & runs until breakfast/brunch on Sunday, 5/23/10. I'm driving to it on Saturday, about 250 miles +/-, and will leave after all the scheduled festivities that are happening that night. Before going I'll take the nickel tour of the town since I've not visited it for over 40 years. I'm actually looking forward to seeing these many people, about 140 are expected to attend, I've not seen for 50 years. I'm a bit nervous, apprehensive and excited. I can't wait until Saturday morning...:)

    NJL...:cool:
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  27. skatesindreams

    skatesindreams Well-Known Member

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    Moto, I'm glad that your experience was so good.
    It sounded fabulous!
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  28. Moto Guzzi

    Moto Guzzi Well-Known Member

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    We had 55 classmates show up which was not bad, considering the short time planning the reunion. The organizers threw it together in about six weeks. I wish I could say I hadn't gained weight since high school, but I have. There were quite of few of us carrying more weight. On the plus side, I'm not gray and wrinkled and people generally think I am younger than I am. ;)

    NeilJLeonard, no need to be nervous or apprehensive; I'm sure you'll have a blast! The class of 1960 was having their 50th reunion that same weekend, and they seemed to be having as much fun as we were. Nearly 400 people came to the school's annual alumni dinner. Somebody did a roll call of years and had class members stand as their year was called. The oldest attendees graduated in 1936! In some instances, three generations of graduates were there.
  29. NeilJLeonard

    NeilJLeonard Well-Known Member

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    Sounds like you had a pretty good day of it...:)...I like the roll call of the years idea at an annual alumni dinner. That could be something that could be done in conjunction with the schools homecoming football festivities. It could be a very good tradition to start.

    I did a bit of detective work online & was actually able to contact one of my best buddies from 1959/1961. I hadn't talked to him since 1965 or so. He's invited me to spend Saturday night with him instead of driving back the same day. I can attend the Sunday Brunch then and take a daylight return trip afterwards. Sounds like an offer I can't refuse...;)

    I'll report on the weekend on Monday. No matter what, it looks like it's going to be an interesting couple of days....;)

    NJL
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  30. Jayar

    Jayar Well-Known Member

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    So excited... mine 20th is in 2 weeks from tomorrow. We have a roster of who is coming, and I am stoked! There are a few who I would love to see that are missing, but :)
  31. Ziggy

    Ziggy Well-Known Member

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    I just don't get it.

    The few people from my school I would like to be in contact with, I am.

    The rest I really have no desire of ever seeing again. :p
  32. Debbie S

    Debbie S Well-Known Member

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    My high school's alumni office mailed the class photo taken at reunion (20th) a few weeks ago (which I did not attend), along with the obligatory annual fund end-of-fiscal year push letter (I already gave). Looking at the photo is scary - there are people I can't even recognize, lol. And our class was relatively small - 124 people - so I knew everyone at the time. Some (guys) are nearly bald, and some (guys and girls) gained a lot of weight. :eek:

    Aren't I too young to not recognize high school classmates? :scream:
  33. Lacey

    Lacey Well-Known Member

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    We had a reunion with my school's class year, that of the ones below and above us, and also the same from four other schools nearby, just about everyone we knew, complete with a band from our era with some of our best friends in it. Fabulous people and music. We did it 10 years and 5 years ago, and will definitely do it again one more time in another 5 years before we all get too old to dance.
  34. NeilJLeonard

    NeilJLeonard Well-Known Member

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    Interesting, hell! It was a blast. It was a hoot. I haven't laughed so much in ages or had as much fun. The old town has certainly changed a bit in 40 years but that just made it that much better. Great location for it & great people at it that all showed up just to have a good time. We did....:D

    The plan now is to have another one in 2 years. I'm going...;)

    NJL
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  35. Moto Guzzi

    Moto Guzzi Well-Known Member

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    How many people showed up? I'm glad you had so much fun and are already thinking about the next one.
  36. Marge_Simpson

    Marge_Simpson Well-Known Member

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    I went to my 10 year reunion, it was horrid.
    All the bitches in my graduating class were even worse bitches ten years later.
    At least 20 people had become physical therapists and were handing out business cards, trying to drum up business.
    Whoever organized the thing arranged with the DJ to play all the hit songs from our senior year. As I graduated the year "Saturday Night Fever" was released, this didn't go over very well. :lol:
  37. NeilJLeonard

    NeilJLeonard Well-Known Member

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    About 150 people, grads & significant others, attended the dinner Saturday night. There were a few others that did not make it Saturday night, but did attend the open bar/meet-and-greet on Friday night, dropped in the event's Hospitality Room at some time during the week-end, or made it to the Sunday morning "don't-hit-the-road-hungry'' Breakfast. Overall, 100+ grads attended some part of the weekend, as did many other grads from other classes near 1960.

    As I said, it seemed like everyone attended with the idea of having as much fun as possible. I'm fairly certain that they did...:D

    Two drove a fair distance, Kansas & California, to get there. Many still live locally. Only 3 of us live in SE Florida and we've vowed to keep in touch. Since we now have EMail and all that it should be easier to do.

    Evidently the next planned event is a graduate picnic for any and all that graduated from the school since it's founding in 1914 to attend on October 16, 2010. That may be worth the trip, but driving for 4 hours both ways makes it an overnighter because the drive exhausted me. Even crossing the Sunshine Skyway Bridge, one of the most remarkable and beautiful few miles of roadway on Earth, doesn't diminish the wearying effect of the miles driven.

    I'm getting more news about this, and the event in 2 years, later on this summer. I'm looking forward to it.

    NJL

    ETA: Actually, I found 5 of us that live in SE FL. I only met two of the young ladies I had crushes on way back then...;)
    Last edited: May 25, 2010
  38. Moto Guzzi

    Moto Guzzi Well-Known Member

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    I went to my 10 year reunion and had a good time, probably because I looked better than I had in high school and had a better job than many of my classmates. At a 10 year reunion, people are trying to impress everybody with how well they are doing. By the time you get to a 40th or 50th reunion, nobody cares so much about status. I'll never forget the reaction a friend got when she walked in the door at our 10 year reunion. All through high school, she was very shy. She didn't get much attention because she was on the chunky side, with mousey brown hair and thick glasses. She showed up at the reunion and nobody recognized her at first because she was thin and had traded her glasses for contacts and bleached her hair. She was gorgeous and the change really brought out her personality. People were still talking about it at our recent reunion. I had so much fun talking with her again.

    My mother went to her 60th class reunion, but it was the last one her class held. She says only 3 of them are still alive now, and she stays in touch with the other 2. She skipped 2 grades and had just turned 16 when she graduated.
  39. heckles

    heckles Well-Known Member

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    Ah, it's not so much that nobody cares about status by that age, it's that status--and hotness--are much harder to assert and fake by that age so you pretend not to care anymore.
  40. essence_of_soy

    essence_of_soy Well-Known Member

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    I think school reunions are an american thing.
    You only have to look at tv shows like GLEE or 90210 to see how social the education system is over there.