Barefoot Contessa Refuses to Meet with Make-a-Wish Child

Discussion in 'Off The Beaten Track' started by soxxy, Apr 1, 2011.

  1. soxxy

    soxxy Guest

  2. Kasey

    Kasey Loving on babies!

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    I don't know if I would liken it to Chris Brown, as some people have, but it is pretty bitchy. I understand that no one has time for all the charity requests they probably get, as celebrities; but turning this same child down twice? Pretty cold.
     
  3. genevieve

    genevieve drinky typo pbp, closet hugger Staff Member

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    I read the mom's blog and well...I'll say that having a very sick child understandably makes one a bit self-reflective and dramatic.

    But it looks like this has turned into another instance of the internet machinery deciding to right a wrong, and the mom has now asked people to stop:
    http://www.angelsforenzo.com/pleasestopthemadness.htm
     
    Last edited: Apr 1, 2011
  4. Cheylana

    Cheylana Well-Known Member

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    Don't know how I feel about the parents publicly calling out Barefoot Contessa on the internet. What was the point, other than to publicly shame and punish her? With their little kid sick, shouldn't attending to his needs be their priority right now? :confused:

    Poor little Enzo. Well, if it's any comfort, dolphins are freaking awesome. Dolphins >>> the vast majority of celebrities... they are cute and sweet and don't have an agenda!
     
  5. WindSpirit

    WindSpirit OmnipresentAdmeanistrator

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    I read some of his family's blog.

    It reminds me of a girl I went to school with. She had already had leukemia for quite a while when we started first grade. She died in third grade. She was our first reality check that kids die, too. I'm pretty sure she, like Enzo, had already been familiar with death. It just seems so unfair for kids to have such experiences.

    As for the Contessa's thing. I think it was blown out of proportion. Not that it was a nice thing for her to do, but if she doesn't have time, she doesn't have time. Too bad she managed to find some to help her reputation.
     
  6. agalisgv

    agalisgv Well-Known Member

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    I think it's kinda tacky of the family (particularly in this case the mother) to be blogging about it in the first place, personally. First choice wishes frequently don't work out, and it doesn't help the child for parents to nurse the disappointment by posting it on a blog and going on about it, implicitly supporting boycotts and backbiting and such. But then I think it's tacky of the mother to be blogging about the personal affairs of her child in the first place. This won't be popular, but her blog to me reads as one long expression of entitled narcissism.

    FWIW, my son also made a wish, and neither his first nor second choice worked out. Actually, not even his third choice did either, but we went with an alternate version of choice #3. We were very grateful for getting anything at all.
     
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  7. Rex

    Rex Well-Known Member

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    ^^^That's what I say too agalisgv.
    Also, I don't know too many kids his age who are interested in cooking celebrities. My guess is that one of the parents wanted to meet Ina and used the dying son as an excuse to meet her. I know, it does sound awful, but such are the times we live in.
     
  8. agalisgv

    agalisgv Well-Known Member

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    Just from personal experience, I will say that these organizations that grant wishes are on the lookout for parents trying to use their children to get a wish for themselves. So they do put some checks in place to try and counter that.

    I'm willing to give the benefit of the doubt on the wish itself. But the blog IMO is all about the mom, and to a degree is her way of capitalizing off her son's wish and illness.

    I'm trying to hold back a bit, but yeah, not kind thoughts on that.
     
  9. genevieve

    genevieve drinky typo pbp, closet hugger Staff Member

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    That's what I got from the blog too.
     
  10. Rex

    Rex Well-Known Member

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    That is even sadder.
     
  11. Jenny

    Jenny From the Bloc

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    In the old days, people going through challenges would talk it over with friends and family, and perhaps write a journal. Maybe it's just my age, but I don't get the need to share with an entire world of strangers, let alone all the people you actually know.

    I guess kids today are desensitized and less concerned about privacy, but if my mother had had a blog where she wrote about her feelings, me and my family, illnesses and the like, I would have been mortified. I used to cringe at the idea of her talking to other parents or my teachers about me. I can't imagine what it would be like to have everyone you know - no matter how well, no matter if you like them or not, no matter their relationship to you - privy to all that.
     
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  12. manleywoman

    manleywoman podcast mistress

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    People make a lot of money off blogging about their problems these days. Its how the woman who started http://www.dooce.com became the #1 mommy blogger, and she makes a fortune now. Her blog is more hilarious and snarky than when it started, but in the beginning she bitched (in a funny way)_ about her depression, her mormon upbringing, etc. She got her family very pissed at her as well. But now she makes $$$.

    Stories like that encourage people to make their problems public.

    On the one hand, I think it's a good thing for people who are looking for a community that has the same problems that they have so they can work through them with feedback and help. On the other hand, some of it is TMI.
     
  13. Coco

    Coco Well-Known Member

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    Who was the comedian who told Howard Stern about his cancer stricken son's meeting with the Make a Wish people?

    He had his son tell them his wish was to watch his dad have sex with Dolly Parton.

    I *think* he was kidding.
     
  14. taf2002

    taf2002 flower lady

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    About a month ago I was taken to task for assuming I knew the motives of a person who was a stranger to me but that's exactly what many of you are doing now. This woman's whole world is caught up with her son's cancer. I can't even imagine the torture she goes thru daily. And it's not just her son's physical pain; the mental pain of losing playmates is this 4yr old's reality.

    As a caregiver for going on 3 yrs she probably seldom has the time to keep in touch with friends or socialize. So who is this woman supposed to talk to? Her blog may be the one thing keeping her sane. Sure, she didn't need to call out this woman publically on her blog for denying his MAW, but for the rest, why don't we cut her some slack?
     
  15. BigB08822

    BigB08822 Well-Known Member

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    I heard about this on TMZ a little while back. I never once felt like Garten was to blame. I seriously doubt she said "oh no, let's break that kids heart.." If she had other engagements or plans then what was she to do? I think the organization said they have had a good relationship with her in the past. This is all about the mother going online and starting a smear campaign because without all the facts it is Garten who looks evil.
     
  16. IceAlisa

    IceAlisa Épaulement!!!

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    The blog and the mother's subsequent behavior online has nothing to do with Ina Garten initial decision not to honor the request. I think she could have found the time unless she is inundated by hundreds of similar requests every day, which I doubt. It's not a typical 6 year old wish to cook with Barefoot Contessa.

    Also, I know a parent who lost a child at about that age and blogged about their loss and grief. I think it helped them to deal with their tragedy. Having a child with cancer is horrendous. If the mother chose to talk about it online and the child is fine with it, what's the big deal? People deal with their burden in different ways.
     
  17. BigB08822

    BigB08822 Well-Known Member

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    And I suppose that you think Garten sits around on her fat ass all day with nothing to do? She could be out of the country or working in another state. She is certainly busier than the average person. She has a television show, she writes books, who knows what else she does. It sounds as if Garten simply couldn't do it when they asked and I am sure for good reason.
     
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  18. IceAlisa

    IceAlisa Épaulement!!!

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    She is busier than most people although I do know some extremely busy individuals who find time for charity. Was she given just one set of dates and not given an opportunity to name a date at her convenience? The POTUS finds time to make a call on behalf of Michael Vick and I bet he is busier than Ina Garten.
     
  19. BigB08822

    BigB08822 Well-Known Member

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    Making time for charity is different than coordinating your very busy schedule with a boy and his family's very busy schedule. He has tons of appointments, may be in the hospital, etc. She may be in NYC for a book signing, might be in Paris filming an episode of her show, etc. It is not easy to coordinate. I just think it is a HUGE assumption to think she just didn't feel like doing it which is what you are saying. The organization already stated she has worked with them in the past, so clearly she has found time for charity and clearly he is the not the only make a wish child to want to meet her.
     
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  20. IceAlisa

    IceAlisa Épaulement!!!

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    So are you saying they tried to coordinate and couldn't get their schedules to coincide? It doesn't sound like that to me--no mention of that that I've seen. It sounds like she refused without trying.

    What does she mean she has worked with them in the past? And if she has, why isn't she doing it again? I have a hard time imagining hundreds and hundreds of terminally ill children lining up to cook with her.

    I think people are being judgmental towards a person who is suffering the worst fate for a parent and is about to lose her child. And I see assumptions that Ina Garten had gone out of her way and tried to do this but the logistics were impossible to resolve. And then all of a sudden when this became public, IIRC (I haven't been paying close attention) Ina finds some time after all and time issues go away? Please.
     
    Last edited: Apr 2, 2011
  21. mkats

    mkats New Member

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    I've also read reports that her managing/organizing people turned him down without her ever knowing it and that it wasn't until this all blew up in the media that she became aware. I don't know if I buy that, but YMMV...

    The mother's blog doesn't seem all that weird to me. It doesn't sound to me like she was out to "get" Ina Garten, just was (understandably) upset and disappointed about her sick son not getting the wish he had wanted...and blogged about it, just as she has about every other part of his story. I wouldn't be surprised if she just thought it was another day, another update, another blog post, and then it suddenly all blew up in her face.

    Of course, anything you put out on the internet is obviously public...
     
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  22. IceAlisa

    IceAlisa Épaulement!!!

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    I think the blog is the mother's outlet as part of dealing with her terrible ordeal. I don't see anything wrong with it as long as it helps the mother keep her sanity. I am sorry but a mother with a child this sick who pours her pain out in a blog gets my sympathy over the ever-so-busy Ina Garten.
     
  23. BigB08822

    BigB08822 Well-Known Member

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    Yall are right. Ina Garten is a bitch from hell. It is so obvious, how could I never have seen it being a fan of her show? I am so stupid. Also, the mothers blog is not at all emotionally charged and possibly biased because of her stressful ordeal. Surely that is not a possibility. Finally, there is no such thing as a sensationalist news outlet that would possibly pick up on a non story and make it into a story by tearing down a celebrity? That's never ever happened, right?
     
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  24. IceAlisa

    IceAlisa Épaulement!!!

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    Why the :drama:, BigB08822? Are you Ina?

    How is the mother biased? She seems to be reporting the facts that are confirmed and has since asked to stop blaming Ina and move on. Yes, celebrities are targets for sensationalist stories but in this case I think there IS a story.
     
  25. BittyBug

    BittyBug Kiteless

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    Are you serious? Her entire blog is from her perspective as the mother of a sick child - of course she's biased. That doesn't mean she's wrong (or right for that matter), but she is most certainly biased.
     
  26. IceAlisa

    IceAlisa Épaulement!!!

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    So where does she express the bias? Does she say something that isn't true because of it? Of course she is on her child's side but the facts are that they've asked twice, were refused, public outrage followed, Ina caved, they went with the dolphins. I don't see any embellishments on her side, in fact she is asking for calm and to move on.
     
  27. dbell1

    dbell1 Well-Known Member

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    Damn. Let's take it down a notch and talk about the boy. His wish was to cook with Ina. Kids like different things. This child liked to watch her show and wanted to cook with his favorite chef. He's sick. He's watching his friends die. His wish is his wish. How it somehow became his mom's idea is a bit puzzling. Or is it okay to vilify a child and his parents because he's upset some of her fans? :confused:

    He got turned down. Twice. Frankly, if Ina tossed the requests into a flambe or some staffer went 'nope, we did the sick child thing a few times already', the outcome was the same.

    As a mom, if someone did that to my son, I'd get pissed off too. Doesn't matter if Ina cooks for the homeless every night, she's her son's protector and she's upset.

    I hope Enzo has a blast swimming with the dolphins. :) Because, in the end, it should be about the child.
     
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  28. agalisgv

    agalisgv Well-Known Member

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    There's a difference between blogging about a child's death (who is no longer around to be affected by whatever is blogged), and blogging about a live child's illness (to great detail). I'm sorry, but it's not just not all about the parent. It's easy for that kind of myopia to set in during trying times, but that doesn't make it right.

    A child of six (which is supposedly how old Enzo currently is) is not in a position to give informed consent for his medical history to be broadcast to the world. He's not legally at the age where he is even considered able to appreciate the consequences of his actions. Even worse, this blog started when he was all of 3 years old. Expecting a toddler undergoing major medical treatment to give consent to publication of his image, sufferings, emotional struggles, disappointments, and anything he communicates to his caregivers is mind-boggling to me.

    Just because a parent is under stress (including stress posed by a seriously ill child) doesn't give them carte blanche to do whatever in the name of coping.
    Apparently this woman is trying to as well. She has a page set-up for people to direct deposit money into a paypal or bank account.
     
  29. martian_girl

    martian_girl New Member

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    I wouldn't be too surprised if that were the case. It's impossible for a celebrity to do every request they are given, and quite often their people turn things down without the celeb even seeing it. She's probably done dozens of "wishes", but unfortunately she's getting raked over the coals for the one request she couldn't fulfill.

    Not saying that she's all :saint:, but things can sometimes be blown out of proportion for the sake of a juicy gossip item.
     
  30. BittyBug

    BittyBug Kiteless

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    Well, we don't really know that, do we? She presents the facts as she believes them to be true, but is what she presented the whole story?

    She doesn't have to embellish the situation to be show bias, and the fact that the mother is not asking for retribution but rather is asking everyone to move on is still irrelevant to whether she was biased in her interpretation of the situation. Our lens of perception is almost always personal, especially in a case like this. We selectively focus on a subset of facts because that's human nature. (Hence the saying - there are always three sides to the story - his, hers and the truth.)

    (And FWIW, I genuinely don't have an opinion about this situation. My first reaction was surprise, because Gartner comes across as a very warm person on her show, but after reading all these posts, my only conclusion is that we really have no idea why things went down the way they did so who are we to judge any of them?)