A bra?!

Discussion in 'Off The Beaten Track' started by myhoneyhoney, Sep 30, 2011.

  1. myhoneyhoney

    myhoneyhoney Well-Known Member

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    My 8 year old daughter just surprised me with this. She asked if she could start wearing one. I asked her why? She said her friends at school wear them and showed them to her. She said they have different colors and asked me if I could please buy her one, preferably pink or purple with sparkles on it. oye. I don't know... if I shaved her head you'd probably think she's a boy... aka, no boobies at all, lol. What do I do? She wears a size 10 in girls so I'm sure I could find some fun/cute (NOT sexy kind) ones. I honestly can't remember when I started wearing a bra. Anyone with daughters here to give me some advice, please?
     
  2. eusebius

    eusebius Active Member

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    I have an 8 year old too. I don't think I'm going to be buying her a bra anytime soon. She sometimes says she wishes she could wear one, but she also wants an iphone, a blackberry, high heeled shoes, and mascara, lol. I just think they grow up too fast as it is, and I don't feel the need to speed up the process. That's just my opinion about my own kid though and I would never judge other moms on this issue.
     
  3. myhoneyhoney

    myhoneyhoney Well-Known Member

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    My first thought was "way too young" too, but am I being one of those moms who wants to keep her babies "babies"? Now I'm scouring online mommy boards and looks like 8/9/10 are the ages when girls start wanting to wear them these days. Maybe I can compromise with her and buy something like these at Target, more like cropped camis/sport bra style than the classic bra. I just showed these to her and she ♥ them. I guess these will be ok, not trampy at all.
     
  4. eusebius

    eusebius Active Member

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    Those are very cute. The pink one looks almost exactly like my daughter's bikini bathing suit. I think you're a very considerate and concerned mama :)
     
  5. myhoneyhoney

    myhoneyhoney Well-Known Member

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    Thank you! Those kinds of bras seem more appropriate than the typical one for women. I saw these at Walmart. Your basic sport bra style. These should work too, of course she'll want to decorate them with fabric glitter or something, hehehe.
     
  6. AxelAnnie

    AxelAnnie Well-Known Member

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    Um....you really don't want to do things because her friends do. That is a place you don't. Want to even visit. Help her be a child...she is.
     
  7. IceAlisa

    IceAlisa Port de bras!!!

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    These are cute. I think it's OK.

    However, if you do it, I'd have a talk about doing what friends do and how it's not always a good idea, as AA has mentioned. In some cases it's fine and this is one of them IMO.
     
  8. michiruwater

    michiruwater Well-Known Member

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    I started at 10 but I also developed quite early.

    No point in buying one until they need them, I think.
     
  9. vesperholly

    vesperholly Well-Known Member

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    Those Target ones are freaking adorable. The cynic in me says this is the time to get her to do something for the bras :lol: any chores you want to add? Does she get an allowance to buy these with?

    I'm not a parent so grain of salt, yadda yadda.
     
  10. myhoneyhoney

    myhoneyhoney Well-Known Member

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    oh yeah, we've had that talk already. She was set on having those backpacks/binders/folders with those "tween/teen" stars plastered all over them like her friends are buying but I told her no. I've seen her classmates and wow, almost all the girls have those things, oye! Anyhoo, she knows that just because others do something, it doesn't mean she should also ans she's always been fine with that. For some reason this stuck with her.

    Vesperholly, she doesn't get allowance, the little chicky is flat broke, lol.

    funny, she just asked me to teach her how to knit so she can make baby hats. (I knit preemie caps/booties and donate them to NICU's) Maybe I'll have her do that as "payment" for her new bras.
     
  11. Southpaw

    Southpaw Saint Smugpawski

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    I'm not a mother, but I *was* an 8 year-old girl once and wow, I sure wasn't thinking about wearing bras at 8. But then again, I was kind of a weird girl. Maybe the other girls were thinking about wearing bras.

    We used to wear undershirts when I was that age, you know, those cotton tank top things. I don't see how these "bras" are really any different than a tank top. They may even be more comfy.
     
  12. myhoneyhoney

    myhoneyhoney Well-Known Member

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    I originally thought of those hanes tanks/undershirts but it's still hot here so layering that under even a tshirt would be uncomfortable.
     
  13. Aussie Willy

    Aussie Willy Well-Known Member

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    When they need a bra buy them a bra. If they don't need it then is it really necessary?
    Sorry but I am of the thought that kids need to be kids but also encouraged to be so until they get to the age where they need to take more responsibility and fend for themselves. Why do they need to grow up so quickly?
     
  14. Bonita

    Bonita Active Member

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    My first bra was a 28AAA when I was 13. I only got one because people made fun of me because I had no line under my shirt. Girls didn't develop so young in my peer group in the eighties, but most girls had "something" by then (I didn't). Until then I wore undershirts - I have been pretty cold my whole life and was trying to avoid "perky."

    I was a 34A when I graduated high school. I'm now a 36C and not any fatter, just suddenly worked out a lot (the 36 inch back/muscle mass) and got rewarded (the C, family genes, LOL) later in life.

    I honestly find it scary that any girl who isn't an early bloomer is thinking bras. I guess the early bloomers influence the normal/late bloomers these days.

    I can't stand bras to this day and rip mine off the second I get home - but if it makes her feel less self-conscious, a sporty one is probably okay.

    I feel for you. One of the reasons I never had a kid was this kind of stuff...damned if you do, damned if you don't.
     
  15. Southpaw

    Southpaw Saint Smugpawski

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    I don't see how one of those Target "bras" is really any worse than a dance leotard. Or a skating dress. It's not like the girl is going to be walking around with just the bra on, it's going to be worn under clothes.

    I'm in the "they grow up too fast why can't they just be kids" camp, too, but those Target "bras" just look like bathing suit tops to me.
     
  16. aka_gerbil

    aka_gerbil Rooting for the Underdogs

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    Granted, I don't have kids yet, but my inclination is to say that it's too young. My surrogate/ "un-biological" niece is 8, and I cannot imagine her in a bra to save my life.

    When I first started, ahem, developing, my mother pretty much had to force me to wear a bra. The first ones she bought (at Sears) were some of the awfulest, itchiest, scratchiest things ever. The thought of them still makes me itch.
     
  17. myhoneyhoney

    myhoneyhoney Well-Known Member

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    That's pretty much how it is as a parent. :rolleyes:

    I also see those Target "bras" as cut off tank tops. She will be wearing them under clothes and not parading them around. I already broke her heart at the start of the school year when I said NO on the cell phone. (uh, yes, the majority of her classmates HAVE cells!:eek:) Hubby thinks it's ok for me to buy her some as long as they're the girly kinds. I'm going to try and call my mom to see what she thinks.
     
  18. ballettmaus

    ballettmaus Well-Known Member

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    If she doesn't need a bra yet, should not wearing one really make her feel self-conscious? And would it really be the right way to go in buying her one then?
    You should wear what you want to wear and because you want to wear it and for no other reason. And getting your child something to feel less self-conscious sends the wrong message, in my opinion because that doesn't exactly help to become an individual and stand up for yourself.
     
  19. Southpaw

    Southpaw Saint Smugpawski

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    I don't see how a Target "bra" is any different than a slip. Or even a crinoline petticoat.
     
  20. IceAlisa

    IceAlisa Port de bras!!!

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  21. Lilia A

    Lilia A Well-Known Member

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    I wore those at age 8/9, but only because I truly needed them. I hated them because I was the only one in my class wearing a bra.
    by age 10 I was wearing a 30B, by age 12 a 32C and now a 32DD. Funny how my band size hasn't changed in 11 years lol
    .
    There is a certain degree of peer pressure when it comes to young girls and bras. The only reason I hated them was because noone else was wearing them, not because they were uncomfortable or anything because they weren't. In your daughter's case, the only reason she wants to wear them is because her friends DO wear them (regardless of whether they need them or not). The good thing here is that when she starts to develop she probably won't have a hard time adjusting to having to wear a bra for real.
    I personally think it's perfectly fine, but then again it's not my kid. As long as it's cute and girly and not sexy, then why not?
    Good luck.
     
  22. Cyn

    Cyn Well-Known Member

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    I getting your daughter one of those is fine - it's not a true "brassiere" with cups, padding, and adjustable straps.

    I'm not sure where it came from, but MiniCyn has always been fairly modest, and when she was in 4th grade, she asked if she could start wearing one. She wasn't starting to develop at that point, but she was becoming self-conscious about her upper chest (aka her "décolleté" - it feels strange to refer to the upper chest area of a child as such :eek: ) when she was wearing shirts that had a "V" or scoop neck (even though they weren't cut low enough to show anything :lol: ). We found a few pretty, youthful-looking (aka not sexy) ones for her to wear under her shirts, and she felt a lot more comfortable or secure (I suppose) with it. They also looked cute, but at the time, layered shirts/tanks with different colored straps were in style.

    When it came time for her to need a real bra, however, she fought tooth and nail about wearing one :wall: because she found them to be uncomfortable. Go figure :rofl: .

    Exactly.

    As long as she's not trying to grow up too fast and isn't trying to be all hoochie, I don't see any problem at all with getting some of those.
     
  23. myhoneyhoney

    myhoneyhoney Well-Known Member

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    Oh don't worry, she an individual and she does stand up for herself. I heard enough from her teachers at last night's back to school night that she's not afraid to voice her opinion!

    Really, should I be resisting something that will help her cover up? Shouldn't I reserve that for if she wants to cover less?
     
  24. taf2002

    taf2002 Texas slumlord

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    You're the parent & you know your kid so IMO you should trust your instinct. I'm one of those who think they grow up too fast as it is, but I don't see any harm in granting this wish. At 8 they need something...I don't see where it matters whether it's a bra or an undershirt.

    My mother said no to lipstick when I was 12 but I don't think she would have said no to cute underwear if she could have afforded it. Unfortunately I needed a bra at 12 so we'll never know. And no one had cute underwear back then. The fanciest they ever got with young girl's underwear was days of the week panties.
     
  25. Cyn

    Cyn Well-Known Member

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    :rofl:

    Makes sense to me. That's pretty much why I had no problem getting the cami-bra thingees for MiniCyn - what mother in her right mind is going to complain about her daughter wanting to expose less flesh? :lol:

    Now, if she comes home from school wanting to wear a thong or get a tramp stamp :yikes: :scream: …….
     
  26. taf2002

    taf2002 Texas slumlord

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    I'm out of it...what's a tramp stamp?
     
  27. myhoneyhoney

    myhoneyhoney Well-Known Member

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    Hah, that's when she'll hear me tell her, "oh HELL NO! You're sooooo NOT gonna be a freakin' hoochie!"
     
  28. danceronice

    danceronice Corgi Wrangler

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    Tattoo at the base of the spine/small of the back, visible if the person is wearing low-rise jeans...
     
  29. Angela-Fan

    Angela-Fan Well-Known Member

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    tatto on your lower back
     
  30. myhoneyhoney

    myhoneyhoney Well-Known Member

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    I'm pretty sure a tramp stamp is a tattoo on the middle of the waist/hip/back area that shows above the waistline of jeans.