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milanessa
07-27-2012, 12:26 AM
LETS GET BACK ON TOPIC, PLEASE!

Consensus seems to be to DTMFA - in actuality, I've been dumped and I can't understand why. Just because I wanted to get closer to this guy who gave me all this "space" that I never asked for. Drew this out for 5 months, and about 8 dates, several texts, couple long phone calls then prompty cuts off everything about 2 weeks after we had sex. I was not needy, didnt try to call/text him every day, didnt need to know his every whereabouts, thought I was playing it cool.

This really hurts and I know time will heal all wounds. That is why I came here for support. And my thread gets turned in a gay thread about magnolia's issues.

We've said about everything we can say to you. You just don't want to listen to it. I'm sorry for your loss.


Your profile would indicate that you've been on FSU for 7 years. You have to have figured out by now that a) FSU threads never stay on topic and b) FSU threads aren't a good place to get people to hold your hand while you make stupid mistakes. We're far too blunt, as a group, for that. This thread follows the pattern of a million other FSU threads: 1. OP asks for advice about topic, 2. everyone gives OP advice that she doesn't want to hear, 3. OP provides more details that just convince everyone that their original reaction was correct and question what on earth she's doing, 4. OP gets upset that everyone is not being supportive, 5. the thread gets hijacked.


This.

Anita18
07-27-2012, 12:28 AM
I didn't think any other thread would be able to outcrazy the Jackson one.
The subject matter was the thing that fueled the crazy. Nothing's as good as FSU-homegrown crazy! :D

Anita18
07-27-2012, 12:33 AM
We've said about everything we can say to you. You just don't want to listen to it. I'm sorry for your loss.
Also SceneIt...you'd have more sympathy if the relationship lasted longer than a year or you lived together or it involved children. Basically had some sign of seriousness.

From what you've told us, it seems like you guys talked for a while and only had 8 dates and then had sex. That's not a relationship, that's still in the dating phase. (Hell, I didn't consider my fiance and I an actual couple until he started to stay over on the weekends, driving an hour each way. :lol: ) Nowhere in there did I see there was some sign of commitment or even long-term serious interest.

That's why your situation isn't eliciting a lot of sympathy. Most of us would consider that a minor blip and then move on with our lives, and thus we believe you need some tough love to strengthen yourself for the REAL messy parts of dating and relationships. :P

TheGirlCanSkate
07-27-2012, 12:39 AM
That is the hard part - she thought texting and email and chatting was a real relationship. All of my friends who met spouses online did the initial intro and date and then stopped the online part. It's just to get you to meet someone, not to BE the relationship. For the guy, it was a little bit of a time investment on his terms and sex when he wanted it. When more effort was required (a face to face relationship without sex), there was nothing.

nubka
07-27-2012, 01:22 AM
So I guess than all beautiful Brazilian guys are gay?

She didn't say that... :shuffle:

leesaleesa
07-27-2012, 01:52 AM
You have no idea how hurtful it is to find out that there are great many men who are closet gays who only want to be paired off with a she-body because they want to be considered heterosexual.

Huh, and here I always wanted to be a beard, but sadly, gay Ft Lauderdale is out and proud, so there isn't much of a market for it here. Where do you live?

OP, this guy is into you-Like a cat into a mouse. He likes to play, and truth be told, it sounds like you do, too. Why is a good looking, financially sound guy single? Ugly personality? No social skills? Dehabilitating personality disorder? Some men do stay single for a long time and are neither gay or defective.

Magnolia, you really need to write a book. That story about the wild jam on Gay Mountain? Riveting stuff!

barbk
07-27-2012, 02:00 AM
Can we have a lesser gay emoticon? Please? peeping out of closet? disguised like Mr. PotatoHead?

heckles
07-27-2012, 02:42 AM
Consensus seems to be to DTMFA - in actuality, I've been dumped and I can't understand why.

It "seems to be"? Where did anyone here give you a sliver of a doubt that this guy is the Captain of the Good Ship Doucheypop?

PDilemma
07-27-2012, 02:49 AM
Captain of the Good Ship Doucheypop

This is my new favorite phrase. :rofl:

GarrAarghHrumph
07-27-2012, 03:07 AM
I just read a bit of this thread to my husband, and he asked me, "Is there any *skating* on the figure skating message board?" And I said, "Not in the off season, there's not. It's all either Olympic gymnastics or closeted lesser-bisexuals."

barbk
07-27-2012, 03:10 AM
....maybe he's one of those lesser gays you just haven't looked out for, GarAarghHrumph. :shuffle:

berthesghost
07-27-2012, 03:10 AM
Excuse me, but we never went off topic. Girl goes on bad date, can't emotionally recover from gasp the horror of life, so invents blizzar ways to help protect herself from ever being hurt in the same exact way again.

Alex Forrest
07-27-2012, 03:13 AM
This is exactly why a lot of support groups recommend that new members not date within the group for the first year. In the twelve-step programs there's a predatory type known as a "thirteenth-stepper" who takes advantage of the vulnerability of new members. After they get called out in one chapter, they move on to a fresh set of new victims in another. Maybe this is what's keeping Speedy Gonzales too busy to see you?

Haha. I started going to SexAddictsAnonymous meetings ten years ago. Not because I was a nympho but because I was always the type to go 'all the way' right out of the gate and I thought maybe I could learn something. It was disbanded because basically everyone there ended up sleeping with everyone else. :rofl: We didn't just 13th step, we 113th stepped. :)

Prancer
07-27-2012, 03:19 AM
It "seems to be"? Where did anyone here give you a sliver of a doubt that this guy is the Captain of the Good Ship Doucheypop?

And that ship has sailed.

GarrAarghHrumph
07-27-2012, 03:20 AM
....maybe he's one of those lesser gays you just haven't looked out for, GarAarghHrumph. :shuffle:

He does show some of the signs. He sings opera and show tunes. He's into theater. He's very outgoing and can be flamboyant. And he's a professional actor, which we all know is the kiss of lesser gayness. But he wears white socks with everything, even with dress shoes, even with *sandals*, so that pretty much does it for the lesser gayness - white socks completely counteract lesser gayness. ;)