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overedge
07-12-2010, 11:37 PM
And any woman who doesn't appreciate that by hitting some guy, you run the risk of escalating the abuse to physical, is foolish.

Please tell me you didn't just say that.

cruisin
07-12-2010, 11:44 PM
Please tell me you didn't just say that.

Why? Please tell me you don't understand what I meant. Do you think hitting someone is ever a good idea? Do you think that if you hit someone, there is a good possibility that they will hit you back? Do you think it's okay for a woman to hit a man? Do you think it is foolish to not consider they might hit you back?

I didn't say that a woman who hits a man is asking for it. I said, essentially, that before you hit someone, you had better consider that they might hit you back. And that it might be a good idea to control yourself.

Latte
07-13-2010, 12:07 AM
I agree with Cruisin. No one should hit anyone else.
Hey, you guys keep talking about all Mel's money, his wife took at least half of it and he is still paying child support for several of their children.
He can't keep on financing pictures that bomb for long.
I haven't been able to stand the sight of him for years. I feel the same way about Tom Cruise.

overedge
07-13-2010, 12:11 AM
Why? Please tell me you don't understand what I meant. Do you think hitting someone is ever a good idea? Do you think that if you hit someone, there is a good possibility that they will hit you back? Do you think it's okay for a woman to hit a man? Do you think it is foolish to not consider they might hit you back?

I didn't say that a woman who hits a man is asking for it. I said, essentially, that before you hit someone, you had better consider that they might hit you back. And that it might be a good idea to control yourself.

I did not say anything about the woman asking for it. What I can't believe is that you would essentially say a woman who's being hit by a man should just let him do it and not resist.

Of course it's not right for anyone to hit anyone else. But if you're being hit first, to sit there and just let yourself be beaten up is not a sound strategy either.

cruisin
07-13-2010, 12:19 AM
I did not say anything about the woman asking for it. What I can't believe is that you would essentially say a woman who's being hit by a man should just let him do it and not resist.

:eek::confused::eek:Where did I say that? I said that a woman should not hit first because she is likely to be hit back and that can never be good.

If the man hits first, the woman should grab whatever heavy object is near her and cream him. Or she should run as far as she can immediately and get help. I never, ever said a woman should not defend herself, I said she shouldn't start it.

Obviously, you misunderstood my post.

Latte
07-13-2010, 12:31 AM
I did not say anything about the woman asking for it. What I can't believe is that you would essentially say a woman who's being hit by a man should just let him do it and not resist.

Of course it's not right for anyone to hit anyone else. But if you're being hit first, to sit there and just let yourself be beaten up is not a sound strategy either.

She admits she hit him first. And I think it was more than once.
That doesn't make it right for him to beat her up, but, let's get the story straight.

rjblue
07-13-2010, 02:20 AM
In Vino Veritas. When you're drunk, the filter between your brain and your mouth goes away. Those thoughts were in Mel's head, and wine took away his inhibitions toward saying them.


That is an old wives tale. It doesn't work like that.Well, in my case, I lost my best friend for drunken behavior that I don't remember and can't believe I behaved so meanly. I'm pretty sure that nothing in my sober mind had any desire to bang on her door and call her names like slut and whore (because she wouldn't get up out of bed and give me the pint of vodka she had). I still remember that shocked feeling I had when I was wondering why she was avoiding me and several others in my residence told me they wouldn't speak to me either, if I'd treated them that way. I haven't been drunk since.

cruisin
07-13-2010, 02:42 AM
Well, in my case, I lost my best friend for drunken behavior that I don't remember and can't believe I behaved so meanly. I'm pretty sure that nothing in my sober mind had any desire to bang on her door and call her names like slut and whore (because she wouldn't get up out of bed and give me the pint of vodka she had). I still remember that shocked feeling I had when I was wondering why she was avoiding me and several others in my residence told me they wouldn't speak to me either, if I'd treated them that way. I haven't been drunk since.

(((rjblue))) I'm so sorry that happened. I do believe that sometimes the awful things said while drunk are not necessarily things that are covered up in our personalities. I think that sometimes, when drunk, we can get angry and say whatever we can think of to be the most hurtful, to get what we want at the time. Things we know are not true and things we don't really think. And, more important things that we are horrified by in the morning. But, in Gibson's case, I do think there is some underlying problem.

Were you ever able to smooth it over?

rjblue
07-13-2010, 03:43 AM
Were you ever able to smooth it over?No. It's one of my biggest regrets.

At least I never repeated the mistake. Mel hasn't learned anything from his, apparently.

Eden
07-13-2010, 04:19 AM
{{{rjblue, you maybe lost a friend, but at least you've learned from your bad experience}}}

IceJunkie
07-13-2010, 05:45 AM
Mel sounded fairly sober in the tapes I heard...if its true that he's manic-depressive, sounds like he was in a definite mixed episode during the calls (or he has extreme anger problems). Still that is no excuse for his behavior. If you're aggressive/mean normally, drunkenness exacerbates it, as does mania.

overedge
07-13-2010, 06:00 AM
Oh dear. Now there's an even longer tape with an even more out of control Mel:

http://www.radaronline.com/exclusives/2010/07/exclusive-new-audio-mel-gibson-admits-hitting-oksana-threatens-kill-her-listen-it

Japanfan
07-13-2010, 06:45 AM
Well, in my case, I lost my best friend for drunken behavior that I don't remember and can't believe I behaved so meanly. I'm pretty sure that nothing in my sober mind had any desire to bang on her door and call her names like slut and whore (because she wouldn't get up out of bed and give me the pint of vodka she had).


But your behaviour and words came from you - were conjured up in your brain.

It's true that alcohol can turn some nice people into very nasty people and I suppose that this might be caused by an adverse reaction to alcohol - stress, basically. But I believe that drunken behaviour is commonly the result of reduced inhibitions and that words spoken while drunk are honest words - even though the booze can make them louder and more passionate words.

Being drunk is never an excuse for bad behaviour and hurtful things said by someone drunk should not be forgiven or discounted as meaningless on the basis that the person was drunk.

My mother-in-law once went on a drunken tear accusing me of being "a bad wife" basically. The tear lasted for about a day and involved a bunch of phone calls, accusations and ranting/raving.

This occurred on New Years day and was the result of a situation on Christmas Day which caused her to have a very negative judgment of me. Here inability to cope with that judgment led her to hit the bottle aon the New Years morning.

Mom-in-law had a similarly nasty episode with her daughter some years back and the stress of Christmas probably contributed to her 'snapping' as she did. She said something very condemning to her daughter, who works in a bar and again, the judgment was formed in sobriety. IIRC the daughter didn't take it seriously because she was drunk.

I did take her accusations seriously, however, because they reflected her honest opinion. We had to talk it through, which led to her giving me a genuine apology. Since then, mom-in-law has not planned any family Christmases. :)

Satellitegirl
07-13-2010, 01:50 PM
I don't agree that things said drunk are what people "really" think all the time....I think many times the alcohol allows people's irrational or emotional thoughts that they would normally reason through, to come out as their definite opinion, when it most certainly isn't all the time. It's like when a non alcoholic person thinks something irrationally, but realize they're being idiotic....yeah you don't realize that when you're drunk. You really can't(and I say this as a daughter of an alcoholic) say that it's what they mean, because you don't know. Maybe sometimes it is, and maybe sometimes their just screwed up and ranting random bs. Is it an excuse for them? no...because they need to get help, regardless....but I wouldn't take everything an alcoholic told me, seriously.

If you get what I'm saying.....someone may "feel" something when they're drunk and angry....but when they're drunk, they can't rationalize through it like when they're sober. I think most people have an irrational thought here and there...and recognize it, but we don't go around spewing it like someone would who was inebriated.

Mel Gibson doesn't just sound like only a drunk, anyhow. He sounds mentally disturbed.

skatingfan5
07-13-2010, 02:51 PM
Mel Gibson doesn't just sound like only a drunk, anyhow. He sounds mentally disturbed.I agree -- I hadn't heard any of the earlier released tapes, but I did catch a few snips of the latest this morning when watching the news. :eek: is all I could think -- that, and :yikes:. When Oksana said "You need medication" he completely exploded in a raging rant. I also heard a snip where he said "I don't have any friends. My career is done!" I can well believe that -- if any of them have seen this side of him most would likely :slinkaway, if they hadn't already :scream:. He definitely has issues -- a lot of them.