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manleywoman
05-30-2010, 09:22 PM
Hadn't seen this posted anywhere here:

http://detnews.com/article/20100530/METRO/5300310/1409/rss36

So sad.

genevieve
05-30-2010, 10:51 PM
Freeman, who is married and still lives with her husband, said Bowman had lived in Lake Orion with her and her husband and two daughters for the last six years of his life. She said she met Bowman at the Detroit Skating Club, where he coached her daughter.

"We became friends, then intimate friends and also business partners," she said, adding her marriage was "one of convenience."
Nice. I'm sure her daughter appreciates knowing she was just a byproduct of convenience.

tangerine_dream
05-30-2010, 11:06 PM
Nice. I'm sure her daughter appreciates knowing she was just a byproduct of convenience.

Those types of marriages tend to work out better than those done for "love", to be perfectly honest.

I'm sure a kid would rather see a marriage that works, for whatever reason, than emotional or physical abuse between two adults, which happens in many marriages. There's nothing wrong with marrying out of convenience. Most people do this, whether they realize it or not. You can love someone all you want, if you don't want the same things out of life, it won't work.

No reason to be so judgmental. Marrying for reason is better than marrying for emotions in the grand scheme of things. Emotions aren't tangible, and non-tangible things shouldn't be used for life planning.

danceronice
05-31-2010, 12:11 AM
Those types of marriages tend to work out better than those done for "love", to be perfectly honest.

I'm sure a kid would rather see a marriage that works, for whatever reason, than emotional or physical abuse between two adults, which happens in many marriages. There's nothing wrong with marrying out of convenience. Most people do this, whether they realize it or not. You can love someone all you want, if you don't want the same things out of life, it won't work.

No reason to be so judgmental. Marrying for reason is better than marrying for emotions in the grand scheme of things. Emotions aren't tangible, and non-tangible things shouldn't be used for life planning.

...Marry me?

(IOW, ITA.)

genevieve
05-31-2010, 12:15 AM
No reason to be so judgmental. Marrying for reason is better than marrying for emotions in the grand scheme of things. Emotions aren't tangible, and non-tangible things shouldn't be used for life planning.
I'm not judging her marriage. I am familiar with marriage for reasons other than love. :rolleyes: I'm judging the tackiness of being so public about her business arrangement marriage, which I think will probably have some negative results for their daughter.

Prancer
05-31-2010, 12:30 AM
Those types of marriages tend to work out better than those done for "love", to be perfectly honest.

And you are basing your perfect honesty on what?


I'm sure a kid would rather see a marriage that works, for whatever reason, than emotional or physical abuse between two adults, which happens in many marriages

And they don't happen in marriages of convenience? And people don't change their goals or priorities if they marry for convenience rather than love? And people don't end up having the same problems that show up in any marriage if they marry for convenience? And you can so easily separate emotional reasons from reasons of convenience?

If only things were so simple.


No reason to be so judgmental.

Followed by:


Marrying for reason is better than marrying for emotions in the grand scheme of things. Emotions aren't tangible, and non-tangible things shouldn't be used for life planning.

Oh, the irony.


I'm not judging her marriage. I am familiar with marriage for reasons other than love. :rolleyes: I'm judging the tackiness of being so public about her business arrangement marriage, which I think will probably have some negative results for their daughter.

And there must have been something there besides business at some point.

BittyBug
05-31-2010, 01:33 AM
So sad.Truly. He could have had it all, but he just couldn't conquer his demons. :(

Iceman
05-31-2010, 02:32 AM
Most marriages in the world are arranged ones and the success rate of them is significantly higher than those which are not.

How absurd that his family thinks she would steal his body. She would need a court order to have him exhumed and those are not easy to get. $$$$$$$$. Love of money is the root of all evil. His ending was sad enough without being made more so by this. I do hope the autobiography is published or made into a film, assuming it is authentic.
Let's see who could play Chris and who Frank?

overedge
05-31-2010, 02:42 AM
How tacky on the website's part that this story comes up alongside a banner ad for "be a pharmacist" :(

Prancer
05-31-2010, 03:34 AM
Most marriages in the world are arranged ones and the success rate of them is significantly higher than those which are not.

A marriage of convenience is not an arranged marriage. Not sure what the correlation is supposed to be, but I suppose they are free of emotional and physical abuse, too. That's how you know they are successful!

Does any of this matter? No matter how you look at the relationships involved, it's a terrible thing that this is going to play out in the newspapers.


How tacky on the website's part that this story comes up alongside a banner ad for "be a pharmacist" :(

I doubt if the website has any more to do with the ads that come up on their website than we do for what shows up in the ads here. They're triggered by words on the site, no more and no less. There's one for diet aids at the top of this page right now, and I'm sure that was triggered by the story as well.

overedge
05-31-2010, 05:14 AM
I doubt if the website has any more to do with the ads that come up on their website than we do for what shows up in the ads here. They're triggered by words on the site, no more and no less. There's one for diet aids at the top of this page right now, and I'm sure that was triggered by the story as well.

Most newspaper websites are careful to put some controls on their ads so inappropriate ads don't show up with the content of stories. I know that ads are generated by keywords in the text, but it is possible to put limiters on the ads so, for example, the site doesn't get an ad for a gun shop showing up next to a story about a shooting death.

Iceman
05-31-2010, 03:39 PM
[QUOTE=Prancer;2776050]A marriage of convenience is not an arranged marriage. Not sure what the correlation is supposed to be, but I suppose they are free of emotional and physical abuse, too. That's how you know they are successful!

Not all, but some arranged marriages are marriages of convenience. The Van Snooties want their off spring to marry a Van Snob to significantly increase social and/or financial clout and/or political influence.

REO
05-31-2010, 04:53 PM
JMO but I think this Freeman person is kinda shady. I think she's a opportunist who thinks she's going to make money off his book draft. His family - parents and daughter are the one's who should profit from any book or movie deals. Was he estranged from them? I didn't really get that from the article. The body snatching thing is a little over the top. Also if he was so happy with the Freemans why did he "slip up" after three years? I don't care what her marriage is like she seems skeevy.

Prancer
05-31-2010, 09:48 PM
Not all, but some arranged marriages are marriages of convenience. The Van Snooties want their off spring to marry a Van Snob to significantly increase social and/or financial clout and/or political influence.

Again, I have no idea why such a thing is relevant, but if we are talking about parents making arrangements for offspring, we are talking about an arranged marriage--provided, of course, the Van Snooties get their way. Arranged marriages are usually arranged for the purpose of increasing or maintaining wealth and property, maintaining tradition, etc., etc. If you are equating success with the lower divorce rate, then you must also consider that the social pressure against divorce in countries in which arranged marriages are a tradition is very high.

A marriage of convenience is one in which two parties agree to marry because there are advantages for the two of them. Typical examples of this would be marriage for citizenship, marriage for insurance, "lavender" marriages, etc. I would be very surprised if such marriages lasted beyond both parties reaching the end of whatever it was they found convenient about the relationship, but I don't know that there is any way of knowing about such things, as I don't think anyone keeps records on marriages of convenience. That's why I asked tangerine_dream what she was basing her claims on. I've known of a few people who have made them and none of them were married more than five years--but that's strictly anecdotal.

I think this Canadian Immigration issue illustrates the difference quite well: http://www.cbc.ca/canada/toronto/story/2010/05/03/arranged-marriages.html

What I think this woman has is a marriage in which a married couple decided to not divorce because it was more convenient to stay legally married. It just seems unlikely that a marriage of convenience would produce two children, but I'm not a party to their agreement.

And for the record, neither of those two children belonged to Christopher Bowman; he fathered his daughter with his former wife, not April Freeman.


Also if he was so happy with the Freemans why did he "slip up" after three years?

Oh, dear, if you are going to blame other people for his behavior, you could say the same thing about his parents, as he was an adolescent when he started using drugs, and his former wife, as he used drugs when he was married, too.

Most habitual drug users and addicts use drugs no matter what else happens; it's only a few who ever stop. You can't love somebody out of an addiction.

Twilight1
05-31-2010, 10:54 PM
At times I think my marriage is one of convenience, other times out of love, but always with friendship as the continued undercurrent.

IMHO, the ones that really last and are successful have those three things.

I do feel bad that this is media fodder for the daughter though.