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Mozart
05-30-2010, 10:41 PM
I have this problem as well! Mostly it is over little imperfections while performing or ruminating over the intentions of others/ trying to read between the lines. It is driving me crazy!

indicatoto101
05-31-2010, 12:08 AM
Distraction works for me too. One of my reoccuring thoughts is the time I made a fool of myself stating my opinion about brokeback mountain in college. I also try positive reframing, aka "it was a blunder but I've matured since then" and use mindfulness techniques to let it go.

BrokenAnkle
05-31-2010, 02:11 AM
I've gotten much worse about this problem as I age, sigh. Best thing for me is to stay busy and listen to some cheery music. Dones' always work though, but better than nothing.

Aussie Willy
05-31-2010, 06:06 AM
Solution 1. :nopryde:
Solution 2. watch a movie, better if a big drama. It makes me look at things in the "There can always be worse than my situation" :P
Solution 3. Talk to a friend, but avoid the negative nelly type. Even if you don't want to go into details, sometimes having somebody saying it will pass or give you some idea helps. People who dwell most of the times lack the ability to judge objectively or be constructive.
Solution 1: Pity I don't drink. I don't have an excuse outside myself for my problems.
Solution 2: Wish I had more money. But I totally agree because there is always someone worse off than myself. That is one reason why I get annoyed because I am not as bad off as some. Things shouldn't be such a drama.
Solution 3: Lucky that for a couple of situations, there are people I can talk to. Particularly one person who a couple of us both deal with who bugs us both just as much. Talking to this other person recently was great and turned negative energy into positive.

Thanks everyone for the words of advice. I knew I was not the only one and I hope that others can gain some useful tips from this thread. It doesn't require counselling but rather a sense of perspective.

Anita18
05-31-2010, 06:24 AM
Thanks everyone for the words of advice. I knew I was not the only one and I hope that others can gain some useful tips from this thread. It doesn't require counselling but rather a sense of perspective.
Counselling doesn't have to be just for people on the brink of a mental breakdown. My boss suffered from anxiety for years when he was working in NYC, but went to talk to "a shrink" and it helped him a lot. It wasn't anywhere close to debilitating anxiety, but he's A LOT happier now. He totally recommends that sort of thing.

If you think it can help you, go for it. :)

Aussie Willy
05-31-2010, 07:02 AM
Counselling doesn't have to be just for people on the brink of a mental breakdown. My boss suffered from anxiety for years when he was working in NYC, but went to talk to "a shrink" and it helped him a lot. It wasn't anywhere close to debilitating anxiety, but he's A LOT happier now. He totally recommends that sort of thing.

If you think it can help you, go for it. :)

I have done counselling before which certainly helped sort out anger issues and the family issues which caused them. Those were much more serious.

Bostonfan
05-31-2010, 12:37 PM
I hate to say it, but sometimes the only thing that will work in these situations is TIME. At some point, when you least expect it, you'll let whatever "it" is go. I've had this happen in my life many times. It's just a feeling that comes over me at some point where I have put the issue in perspective and move on.

Frankly, unless it's causing you health issues worrying or dwelling on it, sometimes it's not a bad thing for your heart and mind to dwell on something that's bothering you. Rather than distract yourself, allow yourself the time to work through it.

silverstars
06-01-2010, 02:14 AM
If it's something small, I love going for runs with music blasting until the only thing that I can think about is the run itself and nothing else. I've also come to view skating as a distraction (this was NOT the case during high school and earlier, when I was competitive and it was just another source of stress, but since I've sort of redefined it as something fun, I've learned to use it as a relaxation technique).

If it's something serious, I'm not sure how much distracting yourself can help--the issue is still there, you're just ignoring it, which is a fine temporary solution, but won't help too much in the long run. I agree with Bostonfan--let yourself think through it, especially the reason why you keep returning to that one thought, and try to let it go (or at least put less importance on it). I'm not one of those people who is fully capable of living without regrets (although I'm envious of those who can), but I find that this usually helps me.