View Full Version : Rebuildling trust in a work relationship

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05-18-2010, 09:26 PM
I value pitching in very highly but for the most prestigious jobs, I don’t see that it is about pitching in at all. It is about “will you be good at the job”?

And sometimes that is based just on someone’s perception of your skill level , leadership skills, or some other not so defined factor. For that book anyway, it wasn’t so much about getting a good performance review but how to get to top positions. There are administrative assistants who are GREAT at pitching in and being helpful. But it they aren’t perceived as having the right qualities (leadership, etc.) They are not going to get key promotions to truly move ahead.

05-18-2010, 10:46 PM
Joining all the others here who are keeping you in their thoughts.
I hope that everything went as well as it possibly could, whatever the decision.

05-18-2010, 10:57 PM
No. Worse. I'll just tell you. He caught me in his email. I never go into his email, just his calendar. But I really didn't realize what I was doing and didn't realize I was in his box ... I was thinking I was in my own, I clicked on a message that had chart only in it that he had just sent moments before. He was walking right by my desk at the time and saw it. I did quickly close it, but looking back, it was like I closed it quick because someone was walking by. Well, it was part "oh no" and part "someone is walking by" and he saw it on my freaking 21 inch monitor.

He waited about 20 minutes (I guess running to HR deciding what to do), came over and tersley said "can we talk", took me in the huddle room and told me "I just saw a doucment on your screen that I only sent to HR" (of course it had to be HR .. but it was just some stupid chart about nothing; not personnel issues or anything). He waited for an explaination, I panicked, I denied it, he said "are you telling me I didn't see that on your screen?", I still panicked, I said something like "I don't even remember what I was doing the last 20 mintues .. .I was talking travel, I answered some messages, I was working on org chart", I kept denying it. Then finally I was like "if I clicked on something I shouldn't have I apologize for that". He repeated several times "are you telling me I didn't see it on your screen", and something about "I have shared a lot of information with you that normally I wouldn't have. I feel like I have kept you in the loop (referring to reorginzation ..which he did)." I could tell me he was very angry and disppointed. Oh GAWD the look on his face looking at me! I never really said "yes I was in your email. it was a mistake", which is what I should have said. I continued to lie (I panicked!!) and then finally did say the lame fake apology.

I'm really scared. He is an ex-military, by the book man. I am really scared I am going to go back to work on TH and he is going to fire me! Can you get fired for that? When I started working for him, its just habit that I give myself access to everything on the delegate box, but when he said he didn't want me managing his email, I just never went into it, but I still had the access. This goes for two other managers as well. I have the acces, just don't manage it. One of those disappeared on Friday (like he went to her), the other was out on FR, but I bet its gone today. This is why I am scared. "They" didn't give me the access, it was automatic thing that I just click all the boxes in "delegate" so I have it.

Why didn't I just admit that when he confronted me! Why didn't I just say "yes, you saw it on my screen. I know you don't want me managing your email. I don't go into it. I really wasn't paying attention to what I was doing and I didn't realize I had clicked into your box". But I didn't .. I panicked and lied.

I'm really scared I am going to get fired. Can they fire you for that?

That is shameful behaviour. Your boss is the kindest soul in mankind if he allows that kind of behaviour to pollute the workplace. And you are on frickin' PAID LEAVE?! WTF. That boss of yours is a kind gentleman.

And the thing is, you're not 21 and is not your first job. I'm guessing...roughly, 55 years of age, why would anyone loyal employee do that kind of stuff? Hacking into boss' email (yes, hacking, as it was done with intent to view private messages), okay. Then friggin' thinking its a smart move to LIE? pfffffffffft.

Save the drama.:scream: I sincerely hope the boss fires these kind of people.

Admin Edit: No need to yell, especially in huge red letters. If there's something needed to be said in big red letters, we'll let you know. Thank you.

05-18-2010, 10:58 PM
:rolleyes: did you register just so you could make this post? :blah:

my little pony
05-18-2010, 11:00 PM
:rolleyes: did you register just so you could make this post? :blah:

it looks that way :blah:

05-18-2010, 11:03 PM
:rolleyes: did you register just so you could make this post? :blah:

And apparently in such a hurry that they couldn't even spell their user name correctly.

05-18-2010, 11:04 PM
arena_gal searches for ignore list feature.... Great Success!


05-18-2010, 11:05 PM
At least we know BC was correct in her opinion of her co-workers.

05-18-2010, 11:05 PM
forget the ignore list, i reported it to the moderators. i hope they do something

05-18-2010, 11:08 PM
I did as well. It's obviously someone who got an account just to be a jerk (probably one of those not-so-friendly coworkers we've heard about.

05-18-2010, 11:08 PM
She doesn't need to see your post!

05-18-2010, 11:08 PM
Shame on you, NoSymphathy. Everyone makes mistakes, and the point of BaileyCatts post was to get advice.

BaileyCatts, I'm terrible with time differences, but I have been thinking of you (it's 6 a.m. Wednesday here.) Do remember, that whatever happens, you have a supportive sister, you have friends, and FSU at which to vent. :) (((((((hugs)))))))

05-18-2010, 11:10 PM
I did as well.

Me three, in regards to the reporting.

05-18-2010, 11:10 PM
At least we know BC was correct in her opinion of her co-workers.

I did as well. It's obviously someone who got an account just to be a jerk (probably one of those not-so-friendly coworkers we've heard about.

I think we are on the same wavelength here.

05-18-2010, 11:11 PM
Me three, in regards to the reporting.